clorox huffing whore

29, she/they lamenting the slut I could have been if god hadn't nerfed me with OCD + figuring out what I like underneath my mountain of sex shame. if that's your vibe: I'm sorry, hi hello, be nice to me!!

[badluckslxt]

eat me out while i’m trying to take a lil nap

[xultraviolentlightx]

Be honest, can I rub your pussy through your panties until everything is just fucking soaked?

[louisegluckpdf]

weed strain called potatoes and molasses

[image-plus-official]

Yan Wei, Love from the Innermost of Marrow, 2013 [1280x1699]

[titty-kitty-cat]

A fun fact about me is that it feels really good to cum inside me

[maidthings]

[charl0ttan]

KISSING COUNTS AS SEX IF IT GETS YOU HARD💯

[anarqueeen]

you fucking idiot. you misread a social encounter. we're gonna fucking kill you

[stoatviet-union]

*at a therapy appointment* I mean sure, but what am I gonna do (doing a stupid voice) "heal?" *rolls my eyes and makes a jacking off motion*

[greelin]

offered to let my husband feel the back of my shirt after i worked out because it was literally drenched in sweat and he just said “no thanks”… so you hate me and want me to die. i see

[greelin]

meanwhile if the roles were reversed he wouldn’t even have to ask for me to be on him like this

[cosmicanger]

[thedeliaishere]

Hands you a drink that's so obviously spiked with love potion and looking at you with big wet eyes and starts to sniffle a little when you don't want to drink it

[winged-void]

the line between a good bit and a bdsm scene really just does not exist

[cottoncandylesbo]

i love "bite me" as a retort. your frustrating me, come put your spit and teeth all over me for it. and maybe lick me a little. because i hate you

[muggleassassin]

If you have a crush on me prove it and send me $100 😩😂

[bbyyygirl]

the tarot cards said you belong in me

[mumblesplash]

it's such bs that the whole guilt-ridden stoic self-sacrificing martyr thing doesn't work outside of fiction. repressing all your emotions and neglecting your physical wellbeing should make you god's most tragically beautiful morally unassailable little soldier of righteousness but all it does is give you bad skin and gastrointestinal problems

[mumblesplash]

like what do you MEAN the number 1 sexiest character trait of all time is just kind of offputting and bad for you in real life. next you'll tell me smoking has consequences other than looking like a mysterious badass

[whatdoesthevixensay]

correct

[eileenlufkin]

[id screen print of op mumblesplash tags #actually re: post i just rbed#sleeplessness should make you CHARMINGLY DISHEVELED AND GRUMPY#and HUMOROUSLY FOND OF CAFFEINE#not WORSE HEALTH OUTCOMES ACROSS EVERY MEASURABLE MARKER and DEPRESSED end id]

some other good tags:

by metanarrates #LITERALLY and also quite frankly it makes you behave in stupid ways#like man you're not some self sacrificing noble warrior you're being fucking weird in an aldis because you won't get the snacks you want

another by mumblesplash #stupid and unfair that self destructive tendencies don't do anything but destroy you#they should universally result in an 'all this time you lacked The Vitamin' scenario at minimum