anna

27 • she/her • sporadic user of tumblr at the moment but never fully gone

[dogsdayilya]

Loyalty (1869)

— by Briton Rivière

Loyalty (2025)

— by Ilya Rozanov

[snailspell]

I really really want to see Shane Hollander have just one (1) interaction getting to come out on his own terms at some point. How insane is it that he's never really come out to anyone ever?? It's always been because someone figured it out, someone walked in on them, they got outed to the whole fucking world so now pretty much anyone they interact with already knows and the opportunity to come out to anyone basically got taken away permanently, it was never just his decision.

Maybe he makes a new friend (who doesn't give a fuck about hockey and somehow hasn't heard about the gay hockey royal wedding) at the gym and this is a gymbro type (but like, loveable himbo) and he and Shane are always there at the same time early in the morning and talk about their gym routines and stuff and some random day gym dude sees Shane put his ring back on after working out and he's like "yo i had no idea you were married?" because they're usually not coming in or leaving at the same time and Shane wears his ring on a chain around his neck while working out and I guess the guy isn't the most perceptive. And maybe Shane hesitates for a moment. who knows how this dude is going to react, Montreal still deep in his bones, even if everyone in Ottawa has been great. but he tells him about his husband. He's never hiding Ilya ever again. And this guy doesn't make it a big deal at all and just asks a very normal follow up like "your husband not a gym guy?" because Shane's always there by himself and Shane gets to talk about his husband (his husband!) all casually like "oh no he is, just not a morning person" and on the drive home it dawns on him, like, holy shit?? he just came out to someone? and it wasn't a big deal that he's gay? and there was no hockey discourse? no opinions about who Ilya is? no rivalry talk? this is so nice, what the hell??

I just need him to have one positive coming out experience completely on his own terms pretty pretty please he deserves the world

[snailspell]

listen, i love yuna and david with all my heart but i want to see shane grow more independent from them so badly. maybe he just grows apart from them a tiny bit gradually as he's building his life with ilya once they're married, maybe something happens and he kind of snaps, but give me shane who realizes he has never gotten to make a decision in his life just for himself ever. give me shane who snaps at yuna when she once again tells him how much of a role model he needs to be and that he can't afford to make a single tiny mistake. she's not wrong about people looking up to him and that he's judged with a lot more scrutiny than white players, but she also 100% exacerbated his anxiety levels by like a million the way she speaks about all the responsibility he has. give me shane who realizes how batshit insane it is to quit your normal job to manage your son's hockey career (i'm not sure this is the case in canon but the way she's presented in the show makes me assume it is?) so now like half the household income of the family depends on how well you're playing (and on you not saying something dumb in public because brand reputation) when you're still a teenager??

obviously they love shane and everyone is just doing their best but i think the dynamic yuna and shane have is inherently one that is going to create conflict and we've only ever gotten to see the tiniest glimpses of it and i want more

[isisisak]

Ilya grinned at him, hand already reaching into the bag for more chips. And Shane tried to not notice the orange hue to Ilya's fingers and where they came really close to his couch.

"What?" he asked. Ilya shrugged. "Is cute. You got all these for me."

Shane furrowed his brow confused. Then he followed Ilya's hint - who was waving a little with the chips bag on his hand (crumbs where gathering on Ilya's stomach. Shane had a sudden vision where he just vacuumed right over him). "Oh, these. No, I had them."

A smug nod from Ilya that said he clearly didn't believe him. "Sure. You eat these?"

"No? They have Red 40, Ilya."

"Oh, boo, Red 40. So bad for you."

"It is bad for you."

"Why do you have them then?"

"They were in one of the PR packages from the All Star Game. You probably got the same one."

Ilya's hand stilled. The smile vanished from his face.

"Someone send these to you."

"Yes." And Shane felt like he should point out "I put them on the counter for you." It had taken him a bit longer than he'd like to admit to drape them the way he wanted. The Orange One kept falling.

Ilya rolled the open bag up and threw it on the coffee table, lips pursed.

"Wha- Oh my god! Are you mad I didn't buy these for you?" Shane couldn't help his chuckle. This was rediculous.

Ilya huffed indignantly and shook his head. "No?"

Shane stood up to get a paper towel - he really wanted to go lay down on top of his boyfriend to make amends but that was not happening before that orange hand was cleaned.

@sillypenguinwitch this ones for you

[bleachblondephil]

whatever

[oknotgood]

I can be sooooooo normal about this. (It's not even a new interview. I'm only just discovering it.)

[snazzycicada]

[hollanovsgingermelt]

this parallel literally makes my stomach turn ugh. the confusion and nervousness on ilya's face in the firs clip vs him letting his guard down fully in the second clip, knowing its been almost a decade of them hiding and growing together before they earned a moment of peace and silence to be honest with each other ugh MY BABIES

[serenadeformice-deactivated2025]

I think maybe the first part of keeping others safe and making them feel safe is recognizing the ways in which you are capable of harming them, especially without even realizing it

[serenadeformice-deactivated2025]

If you imagine yourself as an innocent and pure thing incapable of harming anyone, I'm not sure I'll ever feel safe around you. Sorry. Because when you define your entire personality in being harmless, you will respond poorly when you do, inevitably, cause harm.

[snailspell]

there's something so beautiful about ilya being so confident in his sexuality. like yes, he's not out, but that's because of external forces and safety concerns, not because of internal struggle. having grown up in russia, with family that wouldn't have allowed any kind of softness, in a sport that's so hyper-masculine and straight, having to conform to that image for the public eye... you might expect him to have pushed all his feelings away and not engaged with them at all. yet he had the confidence to act on his curiosity with his coach's son even as a teenager, he's the queer fairy godmother to all the other characters in the books, he notices all the little details about shane, and is always making sure he's okay, and cares so much about everyone else around him as well. understands how much there is to be gained from being in community with others who share your experiences and engages in facilitating that community. will pet every single puppy he sees. will play the most ridiculous games and perform the silliest theatrics to make children laugh. ilya rozanov you beautiful, beautiful soul.

and obviously he doesn't let this show all the time and with everyone, but he does, and it's always there, even if it's hidden beneath the surface sometimes. and there's just so much strength in maintaining your softness when you've been forced to push it away for so long. in allowing yourself to care so much, feel so deeply. in opening up about things you've been taught over and over again are going to be met with ridicule and violence. to allow yourself to be vulnerable. in spite of it all.

[shamebats]

Cats getting caught doing crimes

[flipocrite]

it takes quite a bit of social intelligence for a creature to understand:

I know what I am doing is wrong

I know there is an activity that looks similar that is not wrong

If I am quick I can plausibly pass one off as the other

[gingerhastoomanyobsessions]

these cats are displaying remarkable theory of mind skills by not only registering that the humans can perceive them but actively trying to manipulate that perception! that requires one to be aware that other individuals have complicated interior thoughts of their own, to know that those thoughts are not always based on truth, and to quickly decide on the best possible “lie” for the situation. this is why I despise animal intelligence tasks based on obedience— some of the most clever moments stem from intelligent disobedience.

[eosphoroz]

Insane visuals. Need it.

[andhumanslovedstories]

Some of the categories for the NYT Connections fills me with hatred and wrath. What do you mean “dog breeds with the first letter changed” i’ll kill you

[andhumanslovedstories]

Fury. Rage. Flames on the side of my face.

[s-cullayy]

Recent ones that made me set my phone down and walk to the other side of my apartment

[andhumanslovedstories]

“homophones for places to park a ship” was one of the runner up entities for this post, it not only made me feel bad but also a little humiliated. ultimately I had to respect it for that. word puzzles are a passionate and sensual affair

[snailspell]

[holyfuckingweed]

Heated Rivalry incorrect quotes part 10/?

Part 9

[pseudophan]

it's literally whatever. like i don't even care

[snailspell]

somewhat unrelated but it is so precious to me how much phil wears this sweater. a true blue/green combo enjoyer since day 1

[shaunashipman]

-Anne Carson, Euripides

[therozanov]

His crucifix chain dangled between them

YOUNG ROYALS 1.04 || HEATED RIVALRY 1.02