He turned on the television, and there was Shane fucking Hollander’s face, filling the screen. All sweaty and flushed and happy. Answering questions in perfect goddamned French. Ilya couldn’t even say a basic English sentence without sounding like a cartoon villain. He hated his stupid accent. He hated his asshole family.
Shane Hollander was speaking French and he was breathless and smiling and drenched in sweat with his hair sticking up in all directions. His cheeks were pink and his lips were dark and wet. He looked so fucking proud of himself.
Ilya told himself the twisted feeling in his stomach was just jealousy, but he was terrified that it was something much, much worse.
HEATED RIVALRY — CH. 5 / EP. 1
Make a Move by LavenderProse - (Rating: Mature, Words: 4,825)
"Fucking moron." Cliff mutters. "Who doesn't like eating pussy? Well. I mean." He darts a glance out of the corner of his eye.
Rozanov chuckles into the mouth of his beer. "Marley, you know how much pussy I've eaten?"
"I just meant--I wasn't trying to be insensitive. I know Hollander's gay."
"Mm. True, Shane would cry." He tilts his beer into his mouth then, so Cliff almost doesn't hear him say, "Different for him with cock, though."
Cliff laughs. "You're a fuckin' dog, Rozy."
"Whaaat? I'm just saying, my husband? Fucking lo-o-ves to suck cock. Loves it."
Cliff is just trying to be a good friend. He's not realizing anything about himself at all.
room 1708, 00:23 by sweethollanov - (Rating: Explicit, Words: 2,188)
someone at a sponsor party touches shane like they have any right to. ilya watches, says nothing, and sends a room number with a time.
what starts as a kiss turns into something slow, possessive, and impossible to ignore — until shane understands exactly what ilya was feeling.
or: ilya gets jealous in public and makes it very, very clear in private.
You Didn't Even Give Me Kiss by Yellowvelvetcake - (Rating: Explicit, Words: 4,657)
What if Shane didn’t send his ‘We didn’t even kiss’ text… but Ilya did.
Like a Russian by MoonChildBaby - (Rating: Not Rated, Words: 6,819)
Montreal comes into Ottawa looking for blood.
They get a rookie with a mouth on him instead.
It’s supposed to be just another tight, physical game against the Voyageurs. Hard checks, ugly chirps, Rozanov bleeding a little for dramatic effect, the usual. Shane thinks he’s prepared. Ilya is, as always, one mildly illegal hit away from throwing hands. Bood is having the time of his life.
No one, however, is prepared for Luca Haas.
Nineteen. Polite. Painfully earnest. Carries art supplies in his backpack. Has never had an on-ice fight.
Until he does.
A story about rivalry, locker room insanity, rookie feral awakenings, and the exact moment Ottawa realizes their baby has teeth.
Ibiza Interlude by RoknRollPumpkin - (Rating: Mature, Words: 2,529)
Ilya never saw himself as the possessive type, but realized he'd never been inspired to possess anyone except for Shane Hollander.
what's dying on the vine by dotsayers - (Rating: Mature, Words: 6,464)
Shane Hollander falls out of love with Montreal.
sins of the father by 917651827 - (Rating: Explicit, Words: 3,408)
What the public did know was this: despite all of the promos the league had done and despite all the interviews Shane had given over the years, despite all the talk talk talk about diversity in the league—at long last, the omega captain had done what all omegas were meant to do: breed.
Ilya on Retirement, WAGS, and the Worst Calls He's Ever Seen by that1friendguy - (Rating: Not Rated, Words: 3,693)
Ilya is enjoying retirement.
OR
There's perhaps nothing that is worse of a nightmare to a ref then a former hockey player in the WAGS box. Especially if that hockey player is Ilya Rozanov.
The One Where Shane is Drunk by WonderfullyWonderingAlone59 - (Rating: G, Words: 1,899)
The gang are out celebrating Scott Hunter's birthday. Shane is drunk. Ilya is possessive of him. That's it.
this river is wild by coffeecrowns - (Rating: Mature, Words: 6,345)
Ilya Rozanov does not make it two weeks on Zoloft before the worst side effect hits hard and fast.
or,
“Barrett, I fucked up,” he says.
“Roz?” Barrett sounds dazed.
“I fucked up,” he repeats, and he realizes how drunk he sounds. He’s in so much trouble he almost hangs up.
“Roz, what's going on,” Barrett says.
Bozhe, he’s going to have to say the words.
Now with part two, featuring buckwheat pancakes, psychiatry for millionaires, important conversations, and Troy and Ilya’s worst “your mom” joke.
One of these days I'm going to get together a set of HEATED RIVALRY fic recs solely that made me cry, because this fandom keeps doing it, again and again, and even though it leaves me a wreck afterwards, I apparently keep seeking them out, which I guess that means I gotta share. There's definitely some tearjerkers in this set, but also plenty of fic that made me ugly cackle in a way that was deeply embarrassing to do in public! And then topped it all off with a lot of porn. Feelings and porn, the perfect mix.
HEATED RIVALRY - NO I WON’T BE CHILL ABOUT THE GAY HOCKEY PLAYERS SHOW:
Captain vs. Captain by deliciousblizzardshark, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie & j.j. & rose & cast, NSFW, 64.8k
Following the internet success of Shane and Ilya's presentation at the NHL Awards, ESPN decided to contract with them to do a whole series. It goes far better than anyone could have dreamed.
Of all the Ships that Sail the Sea by forestgreen, ilya/shane & svetlana & cliff & bears, nsfw, 38.9k wip
"Holy shit!" Vic gasps, gaping at Ilya. "Holy shit," he repeats more slowly as realization dawns on him. "Shane Fucking Hollander is your Montreal girl?" OR: Ilya's teammates go with him to visit Hollander at the hospital and a high-on-painkillers Shane can't keep his mouth shut. Ilya learns that when it comes down to it, ice is thicker than blood.
(i can't get no) satisfaction by UglyGreenJacket, ilya/shane, nsfw, 5.6k
@/NHLInsider It’s been a rough week for Ilya Rozanov after a storybook start to the season. After suffering bruised ribs during Ottawa’s game against Montreal on Thursday, now one of his former flames has come forward claiming he was a less-than-stellar partner. TikTok user @/bostonbethany posted a video on Saturday detailing her encounter with Rozanov back in 2017. She says he didn’t pay for her drinks, was constantly checking his phone, could barely make conversation after leading her to believe he was interested in a relationship, failed to satisfy her in the bedroom after trying for nearly an hour, and never called her again. This comes as Rozanov is out for at least two weeks with his injury, while the Centaurs, including his husband Shane Hollander, head to Berlin for two games against Detroit as part of the NHL’s Global Series. We’ll let you know if we hear anything back from Rozanov’s camp.
he looks so cute wrapped round my finger by justhockey, ilya/shane & centaurs, 2.9k
“We’re just, well-“ Choui hedges, then glances round as if he’s looking for back up. “We’re worried that you’re a bit too controlling,” Hayes blurts out. “Of Rozanov.” Shane opens his mouth to respond, but he closes it again when he realises he has no fucking idea what to say. He’s - what?
Dinner Tonight? by FriPie, ilya/shane & hayden & rose, NSFW, 15.1k
There was nothing standard about Shane and Ilya's relationship, so it really shouldn't have been so surprising that they had their first date over a decade after meeting each other. It also shouldn't be surprising that it took roughly five minutes before it turned into a competition.
if by then you still remember by Ehlihr (ehlihr), ilya/shane & cast, 11.4k
Months after Shane experienced his own horrible 81 Tuesdays, Ilya is stuck repeating the worst day of his life: watching Scott Hunter win the cup for the Admirals.
one day i'll watch as you're leaving (and life will lose all its meaning) by hollidayparty, ilya/shane & david/yuna & hayden/jackie & svetlana & galina, NSFW, suicidal ideation/themes, 61.7k
What if Shane and Ilya don't make up so easily after the Boxing Day fight? The Centaur's plane never malfunctions, so Shane never proposes. Instead, Ilya gives him an ultimatum on coming out and going public. It backfires spectacularly.
Is this thing on? by ARustySpork, ilya/shane & svetlana & cast, 12.6k
“They need to return to a conference based system,” Svetlana said, slamming her hand against the table. “It was fucking fine the way it was, why are we handing out participation trophies to shitty divisions?” Ilya raised his eyebrows from where he hovered in the kitchen, cracking open another Red Bull. “This is fun,” he said, deadpanned. “You guys should start a podcast or something. I would not listen, you are both terribly boring.”
#janegate by deadmemewalking, ilya/shane, NSFW, 10.5k
zuko nation @/yaoionice tell me why the rozanov leaks have me sobbing into my pillow … god i see what you have done for others
Definitely, Probably by josie_ides (josephides), ilya/shane & hayden & j.j., nsfw, 11.1k
“Bella broke up with JJ.” Shane stopped dead. He swore the temperature in the kitchen dropped two degrees. “What? Noooooooo.” The neck of his T-shirt was suddenly too tight. He curled a finger in the elastic and pulled. Air. He needed air. Hayden’s voice was lowered to a frightened whisper, “We’re Code Red, buddy. Code fucking Red.”
God's Least Favorite Bisexual by kenopsia (indie), ilya/shane, nsfw, 5.3k
If Ilya had struggled this much to get off in his own body, he would have gone to the hospital. Well. He wouldn't have, actually, but he would have let himself have an insanely high budget to find a discreet professional to come to his home and consult about his dick. Point is, he would have considered it an emergency of the upmost importance and possibly a harbinger of his death. It was humiliating to type: Been touching my dick for one hundred years… nothing is happening. Before he hit send, he thought of Shane's shrill voice climbing to yell at him and deleted the message. He wrote instead: I have question. Private.
Is this about the cookies? by Goodkwuestion, ilya/shane & david/yuna, 6.3k
Ilya is upset, and Shane has no idea what is happening or what to do. He turns to the one man he knows can empathise.
the lily list by flairlies, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie, 7.6k
Jackie Pike wants to know everything she possibly can about Shane Hollander's mysterious girlfriend in Boston, so she starts documenting every piece of information she learns about "Lily". The list gets long, confusing, and eventually, Jackie figures a few things out...
cheater-cheater, pumpkin eater by anyabarnes, ilya/shane & hayden, 13.2k
The evidence is mounting. It’s getting very difficult to ignore: first that sweatshirt, then the definitely-not-a-dick-pic in the locker room, and now the phone call. It’s a shame really; Lily’s such a sweet girl. She makes Shane so happy. And Shane? Hayden’s almost positive Shane is cheating on Boston Lily with Ilya Rozanov.
Shane Hollander Hates Troy Barrett by rideswraptors, ilya/shane & troy, 6.5k
"Hollander." He nodded back. "Barrett." "So can we talk about why you don't like me?" Troy snapped. Then winced. Jesus, he sounded like a whiny bitch. But it startled Shane enough to get his full attention and a bewildered expression. "What?"
baby, you're not the only one by throughadoor, ilya/shane & troy/harris & rose & scott & cast, 5.5k
After they came out, Shane was ready for people to be weird. It was weird with other guys in the league, weird with reporters, weird with angry fans who thought his relationship had tanked their fantasy teams and their sports betting parlays, weird with sponsors and their very enthusiastic pride campaign pitches, weird on all the social media that he avoided like the plague. What he hadn't expected was for things to be so fucking weird with other gay people.
glimpses of adoration by diazette, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie, 6.8k
hayden finds himself at ilya rozanov's for the night with shane, sans ilya. with every physical memento around the house and every trace of shane in the corners, it's abundantly clear that his best friend is disgustingly and all-consumingly loved by his boyfriend. hayden finally understands too just why shane loves him right back.
of a certain age by gurlsrool, ilya/shane & bears, 7.5k
“Wait, I could totally see that,” Connors says. “She wears reading glasses and he’s, like, obsessed with them. Sometimes on the road, he calls her from the bathroom and I hear him begging her to put them on.” “The glasses! I heard that too.” Shit, it must be a fetish, right? She doesn’t just happen to be old. Rozy likes that she’s old. Or: Cliff figures out why Ilya’s keeping his Montreal girl a secret. She’s not a girl at all...she's an elderly woman. Or maybe an elderly man?
MORE RECS UNDER THE CUT because my screaming about the fic in this fandom will be somewhat contained.
does it make me better by smallestchurch, ilya/shane & david/yuna, 6.9k
After Ilya leaves the cottage, Yuna comes over to cheer Shane up. And maybe—maybe—excavate some shit she's buried inside herself. Basically I think Yuna and Shane should let their hair down and gossip a little. And, you know. Heal.
the art of long-term cohabitation by Anonymous, ilya/shane & david/yuna, NSFW, 5.5k
“Sometimes, I wish he was a worse person,” Ilya admits one night, while he and Yuna are doing the dishes. Shane and Ilya had come over for chicken parmesan, and it had been a lovely dinner, right up until David, clearing the plates, mentioned that he had met a guy at the store the other day who was a big fan of Shane’s, had a kid who idolized him. David asked if Shane could sign a piece of merchandise for him, maybe record a video. Shane said yes, because he had a rule, about doing things for child fans. Now, Shane was off shooting a video while Ilya did the dishes, and Ilya already knew the way it would require Shane to drag his public face up from the depths of his stomach, the work it would take him to shed it afterwards, the way it would taint this evening.
attachment: 1 photo by sohardtosay, ilya/shane, NSFW, 5k
Shane is sick and Ilya misses him. It goes about how you'd expect.
if you be the tears, i'll be the kleenex by Anonymous, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie & pike kids & david/yuna, nsfw, 3.5k
“Ilya, hey, hey,” Shane says, setting the plates down and hurrying around the table to Ilya’s side. “What’s wrong, why are you crying?” Ilya hiccups. “Is fine. Is nothing. I am just crying because Pike is so ugly,” he blubbers. “And it is so sad that these beautiful children have to look at his face every day.” Pike waits until Ilya’s got his hands over his eyes to meet Shane’s gaze and mouth 'what the FUCK'. — Or: after Shane moves to Ottawa, Ilya develops a habit of randomly bursting into tears.
contingency plans by anincompletelist (soldouthaz), ilya/shane & hayden/jackie & pike kids, suicidal ideation/themes, 8.3k
Shane's eyes squeeze closed again. “We had reason to put rules in place. Protocol. If ever—if it got to a place where, if he was ever feeling like he might—" Hayden’s body understands before his mind catches up. His blood runs cold for a second, stuck on the scrunch of Shane’s face, the clench of his fist, how desperate he’d been to see Rozanov—Ilya—just now. To make sure that he was okay. Here, in person. Not hurt. Alive. “Oh,” Hayden hears himself say distantly. “Oh, fuck, Shane.” -- or, Ilya needs a place to go, and Hayden's happens to be the closest. It turns out to be a good thing.
dirty play by Rizandace, ilya/shane, NSFW, 5k
He’s never wanted anything like he wants sex with Hollander, and it sort of feels like they’ve already been going at it for hours, every glance and chirp and hit on the ice has been building to this, working him, driving him fucking crazy.
love was a myth (now it’s my morning coffee) by justhockey, ilya/shane, 4.4k
“What were you doing?” “Oh.” A sweet flush colours Shane’s freckled cheeks, and his fingers twitch where they’re still resting on Ilya’s back. “I was just tracing your moles.” Ilya is going to die. His heart is actually going to give out on him because of this sweet, perfect man who he loves more than he knows what to do with. Who he loves more than anything in this entire world.
he turns off the big light by gurlsrool, ilya/shane & david/yuna & hayden, nsfw, 9k
Ilya knows firsthand that the world isn’t comfortable. It’s loud, bright, demanding, a harsh place in direct opposition to everything he’s recently learned about autism. Is it so wrong that he wants Shane to feel safe here? To carve out a space where, even if only for a few hours, he doesn’t have to grin and bear anything? He can just be? Or: Ilya Rozanov has a lot of good ideas. Telling his fuck buddy that he should consider getting an autism diagnosis isn’t one of them.
the hand on the back of your neck by Anonymous, ilya/shane & svetlana & scott & bears & cast, NSFW, read the tags, statutory rape themes, 15.7k
Ilya hadn’t known the video existed. If he had known, he would have paid someone to have it destroyed. Would have paid someone to murder Kuznetsov, maybe, just for redundancy's sake. But it was peak stupidity, to keep evidence of your homosexual perversion around in a country where that crime could get you sent to jail for several decades, and Ilya hadn’t thought that Kuznetsov would be that dumb. Now here Ilya was, watching a video of his fourteen-year-old self on Twitter getting fucked by his former hockey coach. So. There go the plans for the rest of his life. - Or: in 2018, during Ilya's last year with the Raiders, an old video is leaked on Twitter. Ilya reacts, or overreacts. Shane does, too.
JACKIE! NO! by nebulastars, (ilya/shane) & hayden/jackie, ~1k
Hayden overhears Shane having phone sex in the bathroom and has to share his feelings about it with Jackie.
frisson by floormusic, ilya/shane, 1.6k
They’d had an argument once, on the bus to Toronto. After they’d both showered, Shane had informed him, in a clipped tone, that he’d booked a separate hotel room, and that the space a night before a game might be what’s best for the team. Ilya, equally mad about something he can’t even remember now, had agreed. Shane had ended up at his door again twenty minutes later, with his mouth curled into a snarl, eyes glassy. “Were you really going to just let me go?”
to be Soft by Elpie (Horribibble), ilya/shane & david/yuna & oc, 2.3k
Ilya Rozanov meets his husband's great grandmother and certain understandings are reached.
frisson by floormusic, ilya/shane, 1.6k
They’d had an argument once, on the bus to Toronto. After they’d both showered, Shane had informed him, in a clipped tone, that he’d booked a separate hotel room, and that the space a night before a game might be what’s best for the team. Ilya, equally mad about something he can’t even remember now, had agreed. Shane had ended up at his door again twenty minutes later, with his mouth curled into a snarl, eyes glassy. “Were you really going to just let me go?”
Hayden Pike: Conspiracy Theorist? by WowbaggerForever, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie & cliff, 5.1k
Hayden Pike was not a conspiracy theorist. Not even a little bit. Unlike many professional athletes, he had not received quite enough head injuries to be won over by crazies on the internet claiming that the earth was flat or that jet fuel can't melt steel beams. No, Hayden was a straightforward man who believed in facts and logic. He didn't overthink events or analyze interactions for hidden meanings. He was generally content to accept things people told him at face value, especially if those people were his best friend of nearly a decade. So when Shane started driving to Ottawa more often, he didn't initially think much of it... at least at first. Or: A slightly canon divergent version of how Hayden finds out. Mostly book inspired. Set after Ilya moves to Ottawa.
Timeline Debates by Honeybees_n_flowers, ilya/shane, 3.6k
A few months after Shane and Ilya’s relationship is revealed, Twitter begins to speculate about the timeline of it all. Ilya fans the flames.
He's My Plus One (be nice) by anarchybeauty, ilya/shane & ocs, 19.1k
Shane gets invited to a reunion of the 2008 Juniors' Team Canada. He brings his husband, who just happens to be the captain of their Russian opponents. It goes better than expected.
who's that? by rowed, ilya/shane & centaurs, 2k
Ottawa Centaurs @/OttawaCentaurs WATCH: The Cens pair up to play teammate Guess Who! Full video up now on our YouTube channel 🐎🧔♂️
gonna make this place your home by writinginasnowglobe, ilya/shane & centaurs & centaur wags, nsfw, 7.2k
Or, five times Shane Hollander exposes that he's a little freaky in the Ottawa WAGs chat, and the one time it's not him.
what does heaven know ‘bout fool’s gold? by lunahollanova, ilya/shane & david/yuna, 4.8k
Ilya has his wisdom teeth removed. The sedatives have some unexpected effects, and Yuna feels like a mom again.
i could take away the salt from your eyes by PorcelainMortal, ilya/shane, NSFW, 1.9k
Shane can feel it the moment Ilya’s breathing starts to even out. He has no idea how much time has passed since he climbed into Ilya’s lap. Since they kissed. Since the moment he saw that first tear fall from Ilya’s eye. - OR - The missing scene from Episode 5, between Shane crawling into Ilya's lap and leaving the hotel room.
the friendships we made (and ruined) along the way by UglyGreenJacket, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie, 6.3k
Jackie: Just think of it like this: Jackie: Let Hayden and Ilya plan your birthday, and then it’s just a few hours on one day in one year that you might have to spend being a little uncomfortable being the center of attention. Jackie: …but it could bring us a lifetime of peace. Shane: You really think that’s even remotely possible? Jackie: Well. They either work together and find common ground, or they kill each other. Jackie: Either way, our problem is solved. Shane: That’s actually kind of genius. Jackie: I know it is. It’s me 😉
mic'ed up by hozanova (reymanova), ilya/shane & cast/entire nhl, 30.5k wip
Every time Ilya and Shane are on hot mics, Harris loses a year off his life.
Tuna Melt Rewind by Gnomey2001, ilya/shane, NSFW, 4.2k
Shane arrives in Boston with a familiar plan: go to Rozanov’s house, hook up, and leave before anything gets too complicated. It should feel exactly the same as every other time. Instead, the whole day feels… off. Like he's already been here. Done this. And at Ilya’s place, what should have been a simple, contained afternoon like any other, starts to look a lot like the life Shane never let himself imagine. What if Shane hadn’t panicked after the tuna melt incident? What if, just this once… he stayed?
you talk of the pain like it's all alright by perchancetosleep, ilya/shane & troy/harris & yuna & galina, nsfw, suicidal ideation/themes, 7.8k
As soon as Ilya realizes that he has to kill himself, his brain immediately latches onto one indisputable fact: someone is going to have to find his body. There is no way around that, but not even the premature guilt for whoever has the unpleasant task is enough to talk him out of it, anymore. If he hadn’t ghosted Galina, she’d probably tell him that he cares so much about it because of his own experience finding his mother. She’d also probably tell him that the fact that losing Shane Hollander is enough to make him kill himself means that he’s got a long, nonoptional date with a padded room clogging up his calendar for the foreseeable future. She already has a lot of fucking opinions about Shane and their fucked up situation, and Ilya really is fucking sick of hearing about it because he will not let her ruin the one good fucking thing he has. Had. (or: there is no plane crash. there is still a catastrophe.)
gay, super gay, other by Anonymous, ilya/shane & centaurs, nsfw, 2.3k
“I am not super gay,” Shane says for what has to be the fifteenth time tonight. “You are so super gay,” Ilya retorts. Barrett sighs. “For fuck’s sake,” he says. “This argument is getting real fucking stale. Just settle it once and for all. There's a strip club down the block."
Soap by nomsy, ilya/shane, NSFW, 2.2k
“Ilya,” Shane says. Enough is enough. “You know fucking well that we aren’t meant to have sex for another two days.” “I know,” Ilya says. “So I have a lot of free time. I wanted to be productive.” He draws the last word out. Shane clenches his hands. “Wanted to tidy,” Ilya continues, waving the cloth. “Make things very organised.” “You wanted to tidy,” Shane repeats. “Shirtless. In those shorts.” --- Shane refuses to have sex any earlier than Ilya is cleared to after hurting his ribs. Ilya resorts to desperate measures.
no one is asking for this but i have to make my one million hours on ao3 mean something
the texture of memory: to write a silly blurb would do it a disservice i think, but just read it i am so serious, completed
your presence has gone through me (like needle through a thread): ilya gets a family and i cry one million tears of joy, wip
the anatomy of a bird heart in slow decay: an impossible love story and meditation on grief, mothers and sons, and survival. featuring ghosts in the literal sense. completed
fall in love again and again: the classic tuna-melt groundhog day, with a house of leaves flavour, completed
Jessica: teenaged shane as seen through his relationship with his high school girlfriend, i love them both so unbearably much, completed
home economics: nhl lockout leads to hollanov living together in the situationship era-there's no way this could go wrong! completed
Route 96 Kanata: shane suffers a career ending injury before meeting ilya but where there's a will there's a tortured hollanov situationship nonetheless. full of fantastic ottawan idiosyncrasies. wip
World on Your Shoulders: what if shane had a queer rookie while deep in the midst of his internalized homophobia "i'm not gay" era? fascinating and wonderfully pessimistic characterization, this whole series is a dark comedy that i want to swallow whole, completed
wunderkind: breathtaking look into yuna hollander's inner world but everyone really shines through wonderfully here (ilya my heart i love you so much), completed
I have only two emotions (careful fear and dead devotion): shane disappears from hockey post prospect cup and hollanov meets again much farther down the road, gorgeous tender slow burn, wip
we'll make a home on the cracks: journalist shane fights his way out of an ethics torment nexus and finds true love <3 cute hollanov & fun shane characterization, wip
car wash redhead, tube top R.E.M. concert, juror #6: hollanov character study, power and love, i adore those freaks so much <3, completed
frequently, secretly fond of each other: boston! shane, you know it you love it, wip
some pacific wind: the pains of being asian in a nearly all-white sport and having to communicate to the world exclusively in your second language: a hollanov conversation, completed
side note: all of satorussuguru's heated rivalry fics are fantastic and are on here in spirit if not in actual text
It had to be you, Wonderful you: transmasc ilya you are soooo dear to me, completed
Offside: coach/player forbidden hollanov but it's sweeter than you would expect. wip
Honey, you're familiar like my mirror years ago: climbing inside your soulmates body is a thing that is both normal to want and possible to have (ft. painful but warming version of shane's life post. career ending injury), wip
dark out and still thirty degrees: one of the only a/b/o fics i've ever enjoyed (sorry), dives into the misogyny in the bones of the genre in a way that's very cathartic for me. ft. a fascinating trans shane journey. completed
head and body to you: tortured self-destructive shane character study, toxic? situationship hollanov, canon-typical emotion development through the lens of sex, completed
the soviet montage: obviously already popular but i had to, cold-war era hollanov post. ilya's defection from the soviet union, completed
i've been waiting my whole life to know i wanted you: deep dive into shane's militant self denial that also fleshes out a much more culturally-connected japanese-canadian experience for him. #lifegetsbetter(eventually), completed
pronoms possessifs: shane writes a love letter, just wonderful completed
Home Ice Advantage: another boston! shane but diving more deeply into how being traded would impact the hockey of it all, very perfectionism torment nexus, completed (with wip sequel)
Blizost: what if you could climb inside your lover and share one body between two souls?, wip
Mama's Boy, Mama's Boy: shane hollander's journey if the whole time he was also haunted by his situationship's dead mom, fantastic irina characterization, completed
cracked plexiglass: canon rewrite that fleshes out a version of shane's pre-NHL hockey career that's more realistic to the actual environment of high level Canadian juniors, very very good, wip
i know where to draw the line: older captain shane and younger teammate ilya, super cute, completed
there are like millions more that i will add once i remember them
Do you know why I'm a couple of weeks late with more HEATED RIVALRY recs? Because literally every day, half of the time I could be reading fic is being spent going through the absolutely bonkers level of new fic being posted and organizing them onto my reader. I spend over an hour every day combing through the tags and thinking, "oh, that one sounds cool, I'll snag that one, oh, this one seems funny, I'll throw that on there, too, oh, these thirty seven other fics posted just today look incredible, I've got to save them all and sideload them onto my reader, okay, now it's 2am and I have got to sleep, I'll make time to just read tomorrow!" And then it's tomorrow and oh no the tag has updated so I start my Groundhog's Day all over again.
And the thing is that I can't stop because this fandom has been putting out so many absolute bangers and I desperately need to gather them all up and then try to force everyone else to read them with me! My current thing is time loops. Well, and the ghost!Irina fic that is phenomenal and you 10000% understand that Ilya is Irina Rozanova's son. And fics that break my heart about Shane dealing with being outed and his internal struggle with that. Or every single Boston Bears!Shane fic I can get my hands on. Or fic that gives Kip the single best internal voice I could have asked for. Or-- Look, you guys need to read with me, because I cannot be left alone with these feelings, you gotta join me.
HEATED RIVALRY - NO I WON’T BE CHILL ABOUT THE GAY HOCKEY PLAYERS SHOW:
Game Day by Anonymous, ilya/shane & centaurs, NSFW, graphic depictions of gore and violence, 30.4k
On June 24th, 2022, during game seven of the Stanley Cup finals, Ilya Rozanov takes a skate blade to the thigh and bleeds out on the ice. The next morning, Shane wakes up in his husband's arms. It's June 24th again, and Ilya is still alive. Now Shane just needs to figure out how to keep him that way. Or: Shane gets stuck in a time loop.
Sinking While Swimming by CaffeinatedFlumadiddle, ilya/shane & hayden & alexei & svetlana & troy & cast, nsfw, suicidal ideation/themes, 28.2k
“Maybe you don't have to-” “Uh-uh. No backtracking now.” Hayden pointed a finger at him. “If you tell Shane, fantastic. Would love that, quite frankly, but until you do, I want those goddamn pictures, Rozanov. Am I clear?” Ilya wanted to make some quip about Pike trying to get a different kind of picture out of him, but given the circumstances... He just nodded. “Good. My kids tragically love the fuck out of you, so figure this out.” Ilya nodded again. “Alright then.”
Mama's Boy, Mama's Boy by WhimperSoldier, ilya/shane & ghost!irina & rose, NSFW, 68.3k
Shane's first mistake was going to talk to Ilya Rozanov before their game. His second was immediately, stupidly, meeting the eyes of Rozanov’s very much dead mother hovering at his side.
all that's built with time by laricina, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie & rose, nsfw, 25.6k
"I've been looking at this all wrong," Shane told Ilya. Or - Sometimes, the worst possible outcome turns into the best thing that's ever happened to you.
(We Could Be) Something Great by Anonymous, ilya/shane & bears, nsfw, 111.8k wip
When Ilya Rozanov goes down on the ice, the Boston Bears are already moving to defend their captain. No one expects Shane Hollander, captain of the Montreal Voyageurs, to be the one who throws the first punch. Or: the Boston Bears figure out Ilya and Shane’s relationship first—and decide that instead of letting their captain move to fucking Ottawa, they’ll just kidnap a his boyfriend instead. Shane Hollander would make a better Bear anyway.
Grady v. Rozanov by Pickle_Chips, ilya/shane & scott/kip, nsfw, 19.9k
Kip can't believe no one else can tell how outrageously gay Ilya Rozanov is, but he's not complaining, he's happy to have someone else to talk to at all the hockey functions. Or: Perfect gaydar haver Ilya Rozanov finally gets a taste of his own medicine. A series of looks into Kip and Ilya's friendship, starting after the cottage.
you were always hard to hold by Anonymous, (ilya/)shane & hayden/jackie, 19.9k
Hayden is on a one-man mission to decode Shane's mysterious and elusive romantic life. And by god, he's going to do it. And by god, he's going to make it Jackie's problem.
all eyes on me by gurlsrool, ilya/shane & svetlana & hayden & scott & vaughn & luca/oc, NSFW, 5.3k
6 times Shane and Ilya get walked in on, +1 time they walk in on someone else
heat of the moment by Anonymous, ilya/shane & david, nsfw, 2.6k
They’re in bed, spooning in the afterglow but still connected. Ilya’s face is red, his eyes half-lidded. He looks almost drunk, feral and raw. Shane feels like he’s melted into the bed and never wants to leave it. Like he could lie here, claimed and had, for the rest of his life. And then there’s a knock at the door. He recognizes the pattern, which is a blessing and a curse both. Tap–ta-tap. The way his father always does.
Finisher of Holes (Allegedly) by tintatalk, ilya/shane & centaurs, nsfw, 7.9k
Ilya Rozanov has been perfectly fine with keeping his relationship a secret. Mostly. He is also perfectly fine when an American reporter accidentally tweets 'Shane Holender', which Russian Twitter promptly translates into something that roughly means the 'Finisher of Holes'. He just did not expect to be outed by Google Translate.
7 Simple Rules for Surviving Hollanov as an Ottawa Centaur by rideswraptors, (ilya/shane) & troy & bood & wyatt, 2k
Denny Terry and his three fellow rookie teammates are invited to Bood's house for an unofficial but mandatory "orientation meeting." No coaching staff, no Captain Rozanov, and no Shane Hollander. Why does Troy Barrett have a white board?
you were always hard to hold by Anonymous, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie, 19.9k
Hayden is on a one-man mission to decode Shane's mysterious and elusive romantic life. And by god, he's going to do it. And by god, he's going to make it Jackie's problem.
Hi Lily, This is Hayden Pike from MLH's Catfish by formosus_iniquis, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie, 7.9k
Hayden knows he's not the smartest guy in the world. He's got a decent hockey IQ — good enough to make him the Metros second round draft pick the year before Shane — but he doesn't read for fun like some people. He's street smart, and if this Tracie chick can be a movie star and get cat-fished that means it can happen to any celebrity. Maybe even a celebrity that lets his momager handle the bulk of his social media. Maybe especially his sweet, sheltered friend who has a secret girlfriend he's never let anyone see. Or told how they met. Or even video-called — fuck regular called — in the hotel room he shared with his best friend and teammate.
MLH's Queer Conspiracy by totearup, ilya/shane & scott(/kip) & eric & ryan & cast, 9.5k
Welcome to the secure chat room. Chatting with 10 users. You are user AU08 Rozanov: I want to coordinate a mass coming out for a bunch of MLH players. If we all come out at once, no one has to be first. Or, after his father's funeral Ilya decides to gather all the queer hockey players for a mass coming out.
ten out of ten by gurlsrool, ilya/shane & scott/kip & eric/kyle & ryan/fabian & hayden & j.j. & centaurs, nsfw, 10.7k
Ilya: He should buy lottery tickets because he is the luckiest man on earth Ilya: He should get on his knees and thank god everyday that he got to fuck you Shane: Oh my God stop Ilya: What? I do that Or: The man who topped Shane in Mexico posts about his experience, Ilya contemplates murder, and the other queer NHL players get caught in the crossfire.
hayden and ilya cuddle (not clickbait) by goldengalaxies, ilya/shane & hayden & j.j., 3k
Then, a body slipped under the covers. Then, lightning quick, a strong, muscled arm wrapped around Hayden’s waist, and he was pulled into a warm, male, and very naked body. A hand moved down quickly to his ass before he could make a sound. He screamed, and shoved the body away. The man shouted back. Hayden froze. That was definitely not Shane's voice. Hayden ripped the covers off his head. “What the fuck-“ His voice cracked as he took in the face of the man behind him. No. Why the holy hell was he seeing Ilya Rozanov's face right now?
What The Fuck Is An Elder Queer by luulapants, ilya(/shane) & scott/kip, 5.8k wip
In which Ilya Rozanov adopts himself into Scott and Kip's household and refuses to leave. Kip finds this very sweet. Scott is going to kill him.
the cockroach of your heart by Anonymous, ilya/shane & centaurs, NSFW, 13k
Ilya died, yes, but then the doctors saved him. Cardiopulmonary resuscitation in the ambulance, three electric shocks, two emergency surgeries, twenty-six units of blood. Ilya died, but then he came back. If only Shane could get his subconscious to understand that.
something you can build by some1_around, ilya/shane & hayden & cliff & bears & cast, nsfw, 96.8k
It’s 2018. Shane Hollander has to figure out his new life, in a new city, on a new team, while being out to the world but not by his own choice. Ilya, along for the ride, also has to learn what it means to be connected to a place, to a person, and to his own inner truth. (Sequel to “something you can fix,” set post-Heated Rivalry, pre-The Long Game)
The Jane from Montreal Mystery by a_stray_thief (ashtraythief), ilya/shane & cliff, 6.7k
“So,” Cliff starts. “Ottawa.” “Ottawa,” Roz repeats, and the way he says it, half-amused, half-quizzical, gives Cliff nothing. “It’s not Montreal.” Roz looks offended. “Why would I go to fucking Montreal?” Cliff shrugs, going for casual. “Montreal Girl? I thought, you know, if you ever go to Canada…” Roz scoffs. “You and Montreal girl. You say I am obsessed with her, but is you who always talks about her.” “Yeah, because you’re always texting her!” “Well, I like to get laid.” And there’s Cliff’s opening.
MORE RECS UNDER THE CUT because the only restraint I have is in sparing your dashes a little. Screaming about hockey assholes will not be restrained, however.
Vibrate by NotEvenCloseToStraight, ilya/shane, NSFW, 6.6k
One day, Shane will learn not to take the “you are scared.” bait from Ilya. Today is not that day.
Everybody Loves to Gossip by katzell, (ilya/shane) & scott/kip & eric/kyle, 6.1k
After the announcement that Shane Hollander and Ilya Rozanov have started a charity together, Scott needs to get something he's suspected for a very long time off his chest.
Bring Back the Homophobia by Lossit, ilya/shane & troy/harris & centaurs, 1.8k
Or, the Cens contemplate a world without homophobia to determine if banning Hollanov PDA after 3 years would count as a hate crime.
bad press by Marmeladeskies, ilya/shane & hayden/jackie & centaurs, 3.4k
They’re driving back from Montreal, Shane behind the wheel, when Ilya gets the text from Harris. There is a link attached to it. The text reads, This just came out. Literally just saw it, and wanted to give you a heads up. Can you check on him?
my angel by wolfsbanex, ilya/shane, 1.6k
Shane stares up at him, awestruck. “You’re an angel.” Ilya freezes. “…What.” “An actual angel,” Shane insists, reaching up with clumsy reverence and cupping Ilya’s face. “They sent you down. Because I’m—” he swallows hard, suddenly emotional, “—I’m such a good person.” Ilya blinks at him.
Ilya Rozanov breaks his silence on the Scott Hunter Kiss by Airuna, ilya(/shane) & scott & carter & eric & cast, 2.6k
Is the first day of the new season and Scott's a bit afraid of how his team will act now that he's out. Unfortunately, he cannot dwell on that because there's a video that Carter just has to show him. Or. Some reporter tries to get Ilya to comment on the Scott Hunter Kiss, he does not get the answer he was looking for.
No doubt this Rozanov had lots of hidden charms by oatmeltyou, ilya/shane & scott/kip & troy & cliff & ocs, 8.2k
Ilya Rozanov was an asshole. Everybody knew this. Sometimes, though, secretly, he wasn't. Or, 4 times strangers were kind to one another, plus a few times Ilya Rozanov started publicly bashing bigots online.
Shane Hollander vs The Dildo by isto4u, ilya/shane, NSFW, 3.5k
Anyways so I wrote it: Here’s how Shane bought his dildo and his first time trying it out.
Jane‘s Phone by viridescented, ilya/shane & cliff, 6.7k
As soon as he looks at his phone, he realizes he fucked up. The lookscreen he is looking at is not his. The phone he's holding is his exact model, so it can't be Rozanov's, — that guy has some random Samsung for some reason — so the only phone he could be holding right now… is Jane's. And look, he didn't plan on unlocking it. It would be wrong to encroach on someone's privacy like that when he had already noticed that it wasn't his phone. But unlocking his phone had become muscle memory at some point, and it's not his fault that Jane doesn't have a password.
A Very Chompy Emergency by contemplativepancakes, ilya/shane & hayden, 2k
Hayden already has his emergency key to Shane’s apartment out when he hears it. It’s a weird, muffled sound, almost like… whimpering? Then he hears Shane shout in a strangled sort of way, and that’s when he gets really freaked out. Hayden’s distracted by a thud, followed by muffled cursing in a - man’s voice? “Is someone trying to kidnap you?” Hayden asks. He’s only half joking. “Hayden,” Shane says, and he’s almost whining. “Just—” Shane takes a deep breath. “Don’t be mad, okay?” - When Ruby forgets Chompy at Shane’s apartment, Hayden takes her back to go get him. Unfortunately, Shane wasn’t expecting them.
Chirping 101 with Ilya Rozanov by sleepixgstars, ilya/shane, 1.7k
In which Shane and Ilya are mic'd up during a Voyagers v Centaurs game. They get into a chirp-off. That's is.
Ilya is a Slut Support Group by tenderbleubells, ilya(/shane) & ilya(/all of boston) & ocs, 3.3k
Following the tuna melt diaster, Ilya goes out to a bar in Boston and sees a poster for an Ilya Rozanov support group. Posing as Lily, he joins a group chat of his past consquests and discovers that he's not nearly as hard to figure out as he thinks he is.
Nine Lives by theskywasblue, ilya/shane, 3.6k
It’s hard for Ilya to hate anything that Shane loves as much as he loves the stupid cat. Not impossible, though.
Hayden Pike Is An Idiot by lucahaas, ilya/shane & hayden & j.j., 3.6k
Hayden unlocked Shane’s phone a second time, wanting to confirm what he was seeing and– yep, it was still there. He couldn’t help but scroll back up again in the conversation, too curious to know what could possibly make Lily send Shane a dick pic. More recent messages stared at him, and Hayden instantly started feeling worried for Shane. Hayden stared at the messages, the only thought going through his mind was Shane’s gonna get beaten up by Lily’s husband.
I would bet the house on you by Bugslibrary, ilya/shane, 3k
The first time Shane calls Ilya baby, he barely even thinks about it.
i don't need to know where we begin and end by sargeantwoof, ilya/shane, NSFW, 4.3k
Ilya, golden-haired and laughing on the ice. Ilya, his eyes glinting with smoldering, amorous desire. Ilya, fast asleep, curled up next to him, his mouth open, drooling on the pillow. Even when they fight, Shane will occasionally have to bite back that knee-jerk reaction of want, that sharp pang of need that rises when Ilya gets so annoyed he slips into Russian, when he throws his head back, his curls rustling, and gestures at Shane like, can you believe this shit? Shane doesn't think he'll ever get tired of looking at him, of soaking him in. What a relief it is to be able to.
Hi, I'm Shane Hollander by ItsDaddyMaddy, ilya/shane, 1.1k
“Hi,” he said timidly, then shoved his arm out of the blanket for a handshake. “I’m Shane Hollander.” Or, the one where Shane is put under anesthesia and when he wakes up he can't believe his luck.
affection (in all the wrong places) by shrimpedchip, ilya/shane, NSFW, 3k
“No, no, wait.” Ilya scrambles out of the bed and begins rummaging through his bag. Bewildered, Shane opens his mouth to speak, but every nerve in his body freezes when he sees what Ilya pulls out. A large black and yellow jersey, with the big numbers 81 plastered on the back. Above the digits, almost in a mocking tone, white letters spell Rozanov. “You’re kidding,” Shane sputters, reflexes failing him when Ilya chucks his jersey at his gaping face with an absurd amount of precision. “Very serious,” Ilya replies cooly, still wearing that stupid fucking grin Shane simultaneously wants to brutally punch and tenderly kiss off his face. “Is my prize.” or, shane loses a bet and wears ilya's jersey. they both learn something about themselves that night.
The Citizenship by dntat, ilya/shane & cast, 3k
Ilya had known a public relationship with Shane meant no more trips back to Russia. And that by becoming a Canadian citizen, he had effectively severed his last official tether to the land where he had been born. To the frozen ponds where he had learned to skate. To the home of the language that shaped his thoughts. To the place where his mother had been buried. Or: Ilya learns that change doesn't always have to mean leaving the past behind.
in the negative space by PorcelainMortal, ilya/shane, nsfw, 4.4k
“You really wouldn’t mind if I had sex with someone else?” Shane demands, ignoring the careful phone manners his mother drilled into him from childhood. “Of course not. If that is what you want,” Ilya replies easily. Shane is so fucking angry he could explode. “I don’t want, you fucking moron,” Shane spits. “I can’t believe you’d think that I’d ever want anyone but you.”
the language of flowers by PorcelainMortal, ilya/shane, 1.8k
Shane has no idea what the rules are for boyfriends. He doesn’t think flowers are only for women, but what would Ilya think? He imagines giving Ilya the beautiful bouquet and can’t picture his reaction. Shane takes out his phone and looks around the store. It’s mid-morning on a Tuesday, so it’s relatively quiet. Just him and a few elderly people milling around the nearby produce section. Nobody notices him at all. He opens a private window in his browser and types, Do men in relationships give each other flowers?
you hold my dreams, kid (I burst at the seams cause of you) by addendum, ilya/shane & david/yuna, 6.2k
Yuna Happy birthday, Ilya!!!! We’re so happy to have you in our family. We love you! David Love you, Ilya! We have some gifts for next time we see you. Shane 28 years ago the best and most annoying person I’ve ever met was born ❤️ Ilya Thank you everyone! Except for Shane who is very mean to me. Shane I’m literally in the McDonald’s drive-thru buying your disgusting birthday breakfast right now. Or: Hollanov’s July 2017-July 2021 relationship timeline as told through texts on Yuna Hollander’s phone.
i will woo you, so help me god by Anonymous, ilya/shane & cast, nsfw, 2.3k
Ilya is very easy to flirt with… in theory. That doesn’t stop him from making it as difficult for Shane as possible. -OR- 3 times Shane tries to make his husband weak in the knees, and the 1 time he accidentally succeeds. (But really 4 times he succeeds because who are we kidding)
guess (the tape measure incident remix) by rowed, ilya/shane & harris & centaurs, nsfw, 1.4k
“See if you can pull out exactly nine inches,” Harris had said, nodding to the tape measure in his hand. Shane was the last one to give it a shot. He hummed and knitted his eyebrows together in concentration. His first instinctual pull had reeled out just over 8 ¼", but he corrected himself after a moment. When he was satisfied, he nodded, let go, and dropped his hands back to his sides. He walked away without a word. The video dramatically zoomed in on Shane’s pull, which showed just under 9 ¹⁄₁₆", then twisted and cut abruptly to an edited photo of Shane with antennae and a bright green face, while the X-Files theme played in the background. --- the Cens try the tiktok tape measure trend. now with 100% more tape measures!
california tsatsa and the silver cabriolet by lastdanceandgo, ilya/shane, NSFW, 5.8k
Ilya only wanted a quiet evening at the Ritz-Carlton Los Angeles after the game. But one shamelessly beautiful and dangerously bold tsatsa had entirely different plans for him. -- *tsatsa (Russian slang) — a spoiled, pretty, high-maintenance darling who knows exactly how irresistible they are and isn’t afraid to use it. playful, seductive, and a little bit dangerous ;)
David H has been added to the Group Chat by quietafterdusk, ilya/shane & david & centaurs, nsfw, 8.3k
Ilya’s method of saving contacts is perfect, Shane strongly disagrees, and the two make a deal to fix it. Too bad it doesn’t prevent Ilya from adding the wrong David H to the group chat on the one night the Centaurs are off. OR: Ilya accidentally invites David Hollander to the Centaurs night off and of course David shows up.
2025 cdrama year in review - a very subjective post
This is only going to cover cdramas that aired in 2025; if I watched it but it was made in a different year, it’s not on the list. As always, very subjective. Also, a bunch of potentially interesting dramas are going to drop in the remaining sliver of December and I was gonna wait for at least Speed and Love and The Vendetta of An but patience has never been my strong suit so here we go. (I guess I might update this at the very end of December if I feel like it)
Brace yourself, this one is a doozy - I have watched in part or in full 106 cdramas this year.
DRAMAS WATCHED
(In order of liking from least to most as opposed to pure quality; I am including if I’ve seen enough to make up my mind; yes I realize that’s inaccurate, but that’s my list. Also, as always, if I hated your faves or loved something you loathed, taste is subjective blah blah.)
106 Feud - and the winner of worst drama this year goes to!!! If you've distilled everything I loathe about characters, narratives, relationships in fiction into one drama, this would be it. A xianxia made by someone who dislikes the genre, characters and relationship that make no sense, a narrative that lurches like a starving zombie. With the bonus of a fandom that claims that if you don't like it, it's because you do not get how amazing it is. It is a testament to how much I adore both Bai Lu and Zeng Shunxi that I still like them after they starred in this mess.
105 Fight for Love - one of my favorite novels adapted into a monstrosity whose only interesting aspect is them somehow making their Male Lead basically an extended cameo. Victoria Song is utterly miscast and so is Ding Yuxi (an incredibly solid actor who nonetheless has script picking skills so abysmal it should be studied. He continues his rampage of terror through my favorite novels) but the true culprit is the nonsensical, shrill, atrocious script. Avoid.
104 Serendipity - if boils were a drama, this would be it.
103 A Prime Minister’s Disguise - it’s stupid, it’s cheap, it’s a waste of anyone’s time.
102 Everlasting Longing - more like evelasting boring with some truly terrible acting and nonsense writing (at least they did us a mercy and put two equally wooden actors opposite each other.)
101 The Journey of Legend - legend of where the money that was supposedly spent on this mess went. It wasn't to script, costumes or cinematography.
100 The Seized Destiny - at one point a man wears cat ears. That’s it, that’s the highlight.
99 Love Beyond the Curse - dumb even for a vampire mini and that’s a low standard indeed.
98 Destiny and Saving - sounds like a bank branch, would probably be more fun if it was.
97 I am nobody 2 - I loved the first season but this just didn’t click for me.
96 Filter - I love you, Tan Jianci but not even for you. At one point, FL is a llama.
95 Destiny of Love: and snoring.
94 Phoenix’s Gambit: Love or Crown - just like its name, couldn’t make up its mind what it wanted to be.
93 Touch of the Frozen Heart - I literally remember nothing about this drama except that I watched some of it. Even reading the description barely refreshes it. And that sums it up.
92 Flying Up Without Disturb - even dumber and more incoherent than that title.
91 Moonlit Order - FL who kills people because they annoy her is ordered to kill ML's family (including the old and handicapped) which gives her no pause whatsoever. As he thwarts her to funny music, they somehow decide family murder is a great basis for a romance. This drama is made by an AI Bot and not trained on anything done by humans either.
90 The Prisoner of Beauty vertical - the only vertical on this list. Two words: hand job.
89 Love and Sword - Gao Weiguang is hot. Unfortunately not hot enough to melt one’s brain which is what you’d need to enjoy this dumb mess.
88 Les Belles - More like La Bete. Because it’s la bete of a drama.
87 Eat Run Love - tried to go for Lighter and Princess, Walmart edition, failed at even that.
86 Love Never Fails - until it does.
85 Reborn From the Ashes - the typical "woman gets a second chance at life, gets revenge on those who wronged her, with help of hot powerful dude" drama but done zzzzzz ok what was I saying I fell asleep.
84 Second Chance Romance - for a drama with that title, surprisingly little romance, second chance or otherwise. It's a crime to waste Wallace Chung so but the main question is how something with such a melo premise is somehow so boring.
83 Youthful Glory - cute and harmless. So is a bunny and that’s at least nice to pet.
82 Dominion and Devotion - a mini tried to be a proper palace drama which is I suppose praiseworthy but not what I watch minis for.
81 Si Jin - A girlbossing story that made me decide I’d rather watch a drama with not a single woman than this type of female centric story and also that Jing Tian is a beautiful woman who doesn’t click for me and Zhang Wanyi really needs to stop playing the same role over and over.
80 The Best Thing - fluffy and plotless but oddly soothing.
79 Treasure at Dawn - snore at midnight. Poor Li Hongyi continues his losing streak.
78 A Dream Within a Dream - this is like a boyfriend who lovebombs you but then when you start dating him, turns out to keep a serial killer basement. It started out so brilliantly but then just stalled and then just enraged me. You know that drawing of horse, which is great in the beginning, OK in middle and stick figure by the end? That's this drama.
77 The Queen of Attack - ML's chest is, as always epic. That's it, that's everything that's worthwhile about this drama.
76 Time Reveals the Prince's Heart - let's make Blossom In Heart a mini but remove any sense from it and make it stupid and make ML a psycho. Yay?
75 Love's Ambition - while I am glad for Zhao Lusi's sake that the success of this drama allowed her to continue her career, this has the vibe of an overcaffeinated lotion commercial so no thanks.
74 Blemish Flaw - interesting concept and execution but not really my genre.
73 Coroner's Diary - Ao Ruipeng, in the immortal words of Aeryn Sun: "it's not you, it's me. I don't like you." (The fact that this is as historical as a can of coke does not help.)
72 Love and Crown - what would you get if you put a 100 monkeys at a 100 typewriters? Something that would still be better than this drama. Ren Jialun meanders through this drama with the look of a man suffering from a toothache and still manages to outact anyone else in this mess.
71 Our Generation - girl, he ain't worth it. Yes, even if he looks like that.
70 The Princess Decree - watching this particular sexual fantasy of the makers brought to screen is like watching a discount pastiche of Tigers Sniff the Rose x The Grand Princess x Spring Banquet only with a lot more BDSM and less sense.
69 Blazing Elegance - this is like the trashiest 1980s romance novel imaginable but set in 1930s China. I had so much fun but did I respect myself in the morning? Hmmm.
68 Guardians of the Dafeng - too goofy for my liking for most of its run but that ending!!!!!!
67 Flourished Peony - solidly acted but alas the narrative did not grab me and ML really made no sense as a period character.
66 Moonlight Mystique - main story pointless, the palette vomit inducing but oh the secondary OTP stole the show and my heart.
65 Bound by Sin - softcore with submissive ML and domme FL. Wild for most of its run until it tries to acquire respectability late in its run.
64 Such a Good Love - tried to be artsy ended up just boring.
63 To Love or To Defy - FL is an assassin getting distracted by an honorable prince. The logic is utterly absent but the fun is fun.
62 Litchi Road - this is a gorgeous, well acted and competently written drama, it's just very much not my thing.
61 The Fallen Lady Returns - the typical "woman gets a second chance at life, gets revenge on those who wronged her, with help of hot powerful dude" drama but done competently, if not amazingly part 2.
60 Luminosity Behind the Palace - it started out stronger than it ended but it was gorgeous for a mini and interesting. The ending pissed me off though.
59 Lust and Lies - if a 1980s Harlequin novel was made into a drama set in 1930s China, it would be this drama.
58 Once Upon a Dream - fakecest is the flavor of the day - why date out of the family when your adopted brother is right there, has great hair and dubious notions of consent? This one is very pretty.
57 Kill to Love - toxic yaoi, hi!
56 Returned Master - somewhat less toxic (but incesty?) yaoi, hi!
55 Legend of the Female General - yet another soulless, bland, dumb adaptation of a favorite novel. But the OTP has crazy chemistry, some really fun scenes, and I am happy Cheng Lei finally got to be a ML.
54 The Prisoner of Love - he tortures her, then she tortures him and on and on and on - the usual. Featuring a couple where FL rides off into wedded bliss with the man who murdered her parents.
53 Threads of Destiny - the typical "woman gets a second chance at life, gets revenge on those who wronged her, with help of hot powerful dude" drama part 3.
52 Destiny of the General's Bride - the typical "woman gets a second chance at life, gets revenge on those who wronged her, with help of hot powerful dude" drama part 4 but done really really well and the OTP is gorgeous.
51 The Cross Dressed Union - it largely flew under the radar but this little drama about a ML who lives as a woman and FL who lives as a man and then enter into an arranged marriage, is adorable.
50 The Ascent of Ling Yun - fakcesty eunuch Qing romance in a harem? More likely than you may think with this Temu Yanxi.
49 Stolen Love - someone watched Kunning and decided to write a Yan Lin AU, honest. I liked it but it did get repetitive and FL is kinda brain dead.
48 Sadistic Love - despite the name, a surprisingly not psychotic love story with fakecest and a lot of gay vibes.
47 The First Frost - a modern about broken up lovers reconnecting, this was a masterpiece for ¾ of its run and then made a narrative decision so stupid it ruined the drama for me.
46 Echoes of the Self - an interesting premise and the fun of having Qian Yilun as ML but the ending kinda falls apart (what else is new?)
45 Sword and Beloved - first 40% are amazing, perfect, no notes. Last 60% are amazingly, perfectly, no notes awful.
44 Hidden Love - not the ZLS flufffest, this is full on fakecest delight. FL’s two choices are ML who she thinks is her half brother (he turns out not to be) and her actual half brother. As it goes.
43 The Maid - more of a QSCK novel adaptation than any actual QSCK adaptation has been so far.
42 Reborn - a hard hitting, nuanced story about a young high school girl haunted by the suicide of her older sister and a boy with his own troubles who helps her in her quest for the truth. Usually not my genre but so well done, I couldn't help but watch.
41 Yummy Yummy Yummy - despite the awful name, this is just a fun, sweet, lovely story with some tasty food and a side of cute romance, even if overall the story really doesn't go anywhere.
40 In the Name of Blossom - an incredibly uneven drama that I nonetheless like much better than the first season. The performances are uniformly top notch (especially Wei Zheming who continues to stand out as FL's ex husband - monstrous and magnetic by turns) and this season finally gives Li Xian something to do and tones girlbosssssss rhetoric of Yang Zi's character. But some plot points are fascinating while others drag. Still, worth a watch.
39 Shadow Love - dumber than a bag of shirtless hammers and gets boggled down in the second half but overall a good, hormonal time was had by yours truly.
38 Love in the Clouds - gorgeous and chemistry filled but except for a few episodes in the middle, it really failed to be intense or complex or gripping.
37 A Love Never Lost - I think, if I were objective, this is the best drama this year. It is not my favorite for very subjective reasons but God, what a masterpiece about an epoch. Bleak ending, characters who ranged from complex and controversial to complex and unlikable (still in awe of Li Xian taking on THAT role - Liang Xiang was complex, larger than life, driven, smart and a monster who was a rapist and a betrayer) and the death of Yang Kaizhi (Wei Daxun) a rare moment that made me cry when I rarely get this moved by dramas.
36 The Tower of Whispers - adaptation of Redeem Him with serial numbers filed off (no, seriously, they are being sued!) that will likely be way more accurate than the actual planned proper adaptation. A perfect example of "psycho only soft for one woman."
35 Qingchuan’s Veil of Vengeance - FL is a former, tortured general, ML her sweet disciple who wants to help. Gender reversal of all the best tropes in this gorgeous gorgeous drama.
34 Whispers of Fate - this seems to be a meandering picaresque narrative with a giant cast but at its heart it's a story of loss and grief, with some incredible performances.
33 The Wanted Detective - it's probably objectively not as good as I think it is, but Wang Xingye has never been hotter, I like the story and FL is a total BAMF.
32 Love on the Turquoise Land - if someone would tell me I'd be rabid for a fantasy modern actioner starring Dilraba and Chen Xingxu, I'd have thought they were nuts, but here we are.
31 The Princess's Gambit - there are draggy portions in the middle and the story has its flaws, but the beginning and the ending are epic and Liu Xueyi and Meng Ziyi are perfectly cast as ruthless schemers who soften for each other. The chemistry and the vibes are INSANE.
30 The Glory - a Gothic and female-centric tale of vengeance and dysfunctional families, this is a story with characters shockingly manipulative and dark. It made Chen Duling a bigger star and well-deservedly so - her abused, violent and brittle protagonist is the person who the show rests on. It did drag a little in the middle but then came back swinging in the end.
29 Deep Affectionate Eyes - a lovely older woman/damaged younger man romance that has some insane chemistry and role reversal. MMMMM
28 Sniper Butterfly - what a total delight of a much older woman/younger man romance done right. Swoony and tropey and perfect. MMMMMMM
27 Nine Yin Sutra - Meng Ziyi gets to be a damaged vengeful woman and He Yu the formerly sunshine boy drawn into her damage, with Zhou Yiwei as the their master in this gorgeous, short, romantic, heartbreaking drama.
26 Always My General - like some of my favorite web novels made into a drama. FL is a woman pretending to be a man and becoming a legendary general, ML is a prince who loves her either way - so delicious. One of my fave minis of the year.
25 Kill My Sins - a thoroughly adult story of loss and vengeance, with Liu Shi Shi and Shawn Dou sparking with each other as equally ruthless and equally damaged souls who find kinship (this is a drama where they never even kiss or confess but when they call each other “soulmate” you FELT it.) So good!
24 Strange Tales of the Tang Dynasty 3 - third season and still utterly solid. Who knew I'd love a period procedural so but here we are.
23 The Five - packs more punch and interactions and complexity and character beats in its short run than most dramas manage in 40 eps.
22 A Moment But Forever - in a year that gave me a lot of awesome xianxias, this one does not disappoint. A depressed and abused philosophy major meets a literal and cheerful engineering major - xianxia style. Liu Xueyi is gorgeous and Tang Yan a delight but what really hits is a surprisingly solid story about divinity, life and forgiveness.
21 Gemini - an epic unhinged mini about twin assassins in love (no, they are not related), transmigration, insanity, gorgeousness, ride or die, unhinged ML, equally unhinged FL, trust and makeouts.
20 Perfect Match - Jane Austen but frothier, this tale of a widow moving with her four marriageable daughters to the capital where the fifth married daughter lives, this is a souffle with a love story for every taste and delightful bit of sisterly love on top. Pick your favorite romance! (Mine is fourth sister and her judge husband.)
19 Love of the Divine Tree - it’s like someone watched TTEOTM and went “this is how it should go instead.” Our heroine is a master who finds feral, hot, abused demon child and cat hero and decides to give him therapy via a petting zoo and chores.
18 The Demon Hunter’s Romance - just a solid lovely tale that includes some genuinely adult, common sense interactions and characters and a wildly creative take on demons and their stories.
17 The Prisoner of Beauty - finally released out of the dungeon, this story of arranged marriage between members of feuding clans turned to love is a delight, held mainly by sane interactions and insane chemistry between Liu Yuning and Song Zuer.
16 When Destiny Brings the Demon - not as strong by the end as in the first half (when it was pure unvarnished perfection) but still a great drama with a refreshing heroine, unusual story, and crazy, OP very damaged ML who can heal or be healed through sexxxxxx.
15 Fated Hearts - I would excise the silly sister storyline utterly if I could, but the main story is so logical, so well paced, and the OTP is a perfect pair of feral generals who do enemies to lovers, fighting to perfect trust, flawlessly.
14 Blood River - Gay Assassin River. Seriously, this was smart and fun and well paced and with epic battles and vvvvvv gay.
13 Love in Pavilion - do you like gorgeous pain? Come right in. Do you like doomed love in many varieties and incredible visuals and a totally gonzo set up? This is everything Red Moon Pact should have been but was not.
12 This Thriving Land - an artsy, serious, heartbreaking masterpiece about the life of villagers in the first half of the 20th century; this is anchored by Yang Mi giving an incredible performance as a relatively well-off young woman who marries a poor farmer out or rage at being assumed to have been despoiled and Ou Hao, who plays her amazing husband. But all the performances and the writing are exquisite. Oh, how I ugly cried.
11 A Dream Like the True Love - the best mini on this list, and possibly the best mini I've seen, this tale of a peasant girl who is rescued by a scholar and ends up repaying his and his family's favor when he's taken as a princess' plaything to protect his family is solidly written, full of characters and interactions that make sense, and has an adorable OTP at the center of it all together with some of my fave tropes.
10 Moonlit Reunion - like an intense dream; so beautifully filmed, so sensual, such a swoon, but with a solid story. This tale of a demon queen and demon hunter who fall in love is EVERYTHING.
9 The Blossoming Love - the best xianxia of them all in a very solid xianxia year, this story of a demoness and the perfect saint of the cultivating world goes hard on an incredible OTP and some glorious destroy the pantheon energy. Our Male Lead is not an atheist who does not believe in gods. No, he knows they are real and he WILL end them.
8 Twelve Letters - if it was only the past story, it would be in the running for n1, but modern day portions didn't grab me. This said, the original narrative about two abused, lonely teens who somehow find hope and protection with each other just broke my heart in the worst, best way. Zhou Yiran and Wang Yinglu give insane performances.
7 Eternal Brotherhood 2: second year in a row a season of this drama misses top spot by the skin of its teeth. This grim, smart feudal-world-at-war and the three sworn brothers who deal with it drama comes back with more hard choices, brotherhood, love kept and lost and some insane cinematography and acting
6 Under the Moonlight - came out of nowhere to own my heart. This tale of a former courtesan assisting in cases in the yamen, a sheltered noble son who gets involved and the upright commissioner is everything - smart and moving and with so many points about class and gender (that is not preachy in the least.) It’s realistic in a way most dramas are not and deals with portions of society dramas often don’t, but it makes you both think and feel.
5 Light Beyond the Reed - this slim, harrowing tale of an office worker with a stifling life and crumbling marriage who gets raped and then needs to deal with the aftermath is close to perfect. Mao Xiaotong as the heroine and Zhang Bin Bin as her husband, both damaged by life in different ways long before her rape, are amazing and I rooted for them so utterly.
2 (tie) Eastern Heretic and Western Venom - Zhou Yiwei and Gao Weiguang are mesmerizing in this story of two different martial artists meeting and striking a friendship (and ZYW falling for Chen Duling's character.) It's poetry in motion, it's a meditation on friendship and loss and love and life and what it means to let go or to hold on. What honor is and what it means to be in the world. And it's filmed like a poem.
2 (tie) Legend of Zang Hai - sometimes a huge hit starring a big star IS actually all that and a bag of chips, and this is that rare example. Ostensibly a story about vengeance, this is actually a smart, emotionally riveting character study about selfishness and selflessness, damage, kindness and evil. The script is tight, the direction impeccable and the performances out of this world. Xiao Zhan as the containedly insane focus and maelstrom of all the madness gives a performance I will long remember.
2 Legend of the Magnate - so smart and beautiful and emotional. Chen Xiao is the smartest man in any room, but he's so afraid, so full of decency, so vivid he does not feel too much. The setting is gorgeous, the other characters complex (it features my favorite secondary OTP of the year to boot) - it's WOW.
1 The White Olive Tree - a modern is my n1 drama of the year? The world is coming to an end. The story of a journalist and bomb disposal expert who meet, fall in love in, and are destroyed by trauma in a war zone is a masterpiece. It’s delicate, it’s hopeful, it’s heartbreaking. It also is a vanishingly rare portrayal of trauma that does not have pat solutions or easy outs. It’s a romance and a tragedy in the classic Greek sense of the word, especially for the ML whose very idealism and goodness are what make him both perfect and unsuitable for helping and that ultimately take him down.
FAVORITE DRAMA
The White Olive Tree - for the first time in ever, since I first started watching cdramas in 2007 - my favorite cdrama is a modern. Yeah, I know. Flawless from beginning to end, with literally nothing I’d change, this love story and character story is unflinching in its portrayal of love and trauma. Everyone gives a great performance but it’s anchored by a genuinely jaw dropping performance from CZY as shattered idealist Li Zan.
RUNNER UP (or maybe co-winners, depending on my mood):
Legend of Zang Hai - that rare beast - both smart and emotional, with gorgeous cinematography and impeccable acting, this really shows the cost and burden of revenge and makes you hope against hope for happiness and healing.
Legend of the Magnate - this is smart and funny and terrifying and heartbreaking and is very much about idealism in hellworld. All the characters, even minor ones, feel real and complex, the filming is gorgeous, and oh the relationships - friendships, familial, adversarial, romantic - are pitch perfect.
Eastern Heretic and Western Venom - a short (only 8 eps) drama, this has some of the most stunning cinematography and acting, but it's also a tale about loss - friendships found and lost, love found (but under imminent threat of loss), of joining the world and removing from it and it's just - a tale that is more a character meditation than anything.
WORST DRAMA
Feud - if I could cast the evil eye on it, I would.
FAVORITE SCENE
So many, so I am going to limit myself to one per drama - the confrontation between the general and his son and Zang Hai wandering like a lost soul in the aftermath of his revenge in Legend of Zang Hai, Li Zan in the aftermath of his torture (and especially his hospital breakdown) in The White Olive Tree, the siege of Hefei and the aftermath in Legend of the Magnate, Huang Yaoshi telling of his upbringing to his future wife in Eastern Heretic and Western Venom, outside the asylum scene in 12 Letters, the jailhouse wedding in Under the Moonlight, Di Lin to the rescue in Eternal Brotherhood 2, ML of Fated Hearts just breaking that man's neck at the city gates in Fated Hearts, shower scene in Light Beyond the Reed, "I am gonna kill all the Gods" scene in The Blossoming Love, XiuXiu at her mother's funeral in This Thriving Land.
FAVORITE MALE CHARACTER
Li Zan (Chen Zheyuan), The White Olive Tree - one of the ultimate male performances and characters of the year for me. Li Zan starts the story as a shining light and ends a broken wreck and it’s an epic performance throughout - it shows how uncomfortable it is to love a saint but it also shows this saint as human in all his complexity and drive; it makes idealism human - it’s intense and haunting and you can’t look away whether you are swooning or crying.
Zang Hai (Xiao Zhan), Legend of Zang Hai - I so rarely find actors with such huge and intense fanbases worth the hype, but XZ really is worth it. This performance of traumatized, vengeance-driven but unable to get rid of his soft heart Zang Hai was incredible - so many scenes that just had me jaw-droppingly in awe.
Liang Xiang (Li Xian), A Love Never Lost - Li Xian owns the role of a magnetic larger than life monstrous mover and shaker of the end of Qing. The man is a rapist and a murderer; he’s also a filial son, a supremely competent leader and a terrifying kind of an idealist. This is not a role any idol-adjacent actor normally takes but Li Xian is incredible in the role.
Gu Pingyuan (Chen Xiao), Legend of the Magnate - if Fan Xian had a queue and lived in the decaying Qing Dynasty of the 19th century China, he'd be GPY. The brains, the fear and yet proceeding despite it, the inability to allow wrongs to stand, the temper, the tenderness with loved ones. AAAA.
Huang Yaoshi (Zhou Yiwei), Eastern Heretic and Western Venom/The Five/Nine Yin Sutra - the most powerful man in any room and also the calmest, ZYW plays Yaoshi as someone with the naivete of a child, an ability to look at the world sideways, and a certain alien quality. And yet you cannot help but root for him desperately and want him to get what he wants, whether it's to save his wife or keep his shoes clean.
FAVORITE FEMALE CHARACTER
Luo Shu (Hu Bingqing), Under the Moonlight - she is so complex, so strong, so haunted. Very much a gender swapped “haunted, tough man with a cause falls for a sheltered kind woman” set up for her and her OTP but what I love even more is she’s not defined by romance.
Ye Sibei (Mao Xiao Tong), Light Beyond the Reed - a woman ground down by life long before the rape that wrecks it, watching her try to process trauma and then fight for dignity and happiness was raw, uncomfortable, and amazing.
Liao Tingyan (Wang Yinglu), When Destiny Brings the Demon - this is a role and character that could have gone so wrong, but WYL made her slacker so endearing, so warm, so sane that you completely got why the most powerful (and totally traumatized and nuts) man in the Universe was willing to lean out with her.
Ning Xiuxiu (Yang Mi), This Thriving Land - I have almost given up on Yang Mi before this role. Used to love her but all her recent dramas and performances just didn't hit for me. And then this came and I couldn't look away from this complex, complicated rural woman.
Chen Baoyin (Na Yi), A Dream Like the True Love - clearheaded, clever, compassionate, full of common sense and so warm while never coming across as weak or OP or anything but utterly wonderful.
NEEDS TO BE MURDERED
99% of the people in A Moment But Forever and When Destiny Brings the Demon - I am Team Apocalypse for that one. Truly awful horrors, whether the torturing selfish immortal sect, the useless deities, the evil war demons who created the worst society possible or the gross humans. Kill them all!
BEST BAD GUY
When Deng Wei’s character in Tree, Zhang Bin Bin’s in TBL or Liu Xueyi’s in Moment go evil, they automatically become 10x hotter and seeing they were already hot to start with…but my favorite is Lord Jiuhuo (Charles Lin) in Love in Pavilion - that man was willing to wreck the world for love and he was epic doing it. My favorite part of LiP.
If we are going for not (to me) sexy, the Marquis from Legend of Zang Hai. That man was a monstrous force of nature.
"YOU TRIED" AWARD (aka a good performance in a hot mess)
Liu Yuning, A Dream Within a Dream - his performance, his character and his get up deserved a much much much better drama.
“HAROLD, THEY ARE LESBIANS” AWARD
And Chen Duling is in this one for the second year in a row - Zhuang Hanyan (CDL) x Chai Jing (Jinna Fu) in The Glory are 100% a couple, with frankly as many couple scenes and set ups as the ostensibly canon het OTP.
"WHEN GOD CLOSES A DOOR HE OPENS A WINDOW" AWARD (aka China banned BL but these martial brothers are awfully...brotherly)
Blood River and Whispers of Fate tie (and narrowly edge out Returned Master since that was a mini and has more leeway) as the martial brothers at the center of the narrative are very very "killers in love/as straight as a crooked line/you are my soulmatey soulmate" gay for each other.
“HOW DID CENSORS NAP THROUGH THIS” AWARD
Honestly, any mini would be on this list (have you SEEN the sex scenes in Blazing Elegance?) but if we are talking “proper” dramas, let’s go with The Glory, which let all sorts of awful, murdery characters get a happy ending and the seeming relaxation of "no emperor can be awful" rule.
MALE LEAD MOST LIKELY TO BE BROUGHT HOME TO MOTHER
No, thank you! The few modern ones she’d not approve of (Li Zan is likely to leave you a young widow, the poor ML of 12 Letters needs a wrap around support services not dating, and Sang Yan from TFF would never decouple from his girl anyway) and the period ones are no go since few moms would be keen on wild-eyed, bloodied sons in law however hot and long haired they may be. This said, maybe the Sniper Butterfly ML if we change the category to "brought home FOR mother," since the man is gonna want her instead of you, let's face it.
"BEST STABBED BY A MULTITUDE OF SWORDS FOR THE CHANCE TO DEFY CELIBACY" SCENE
Sword and Beloved was impressive with its 10K swords and whatever, but at least Xu Kai in Moonlit Reunion actually got laid (and laid and laid and laid) after he was similarly penetrated.
FAVORITE SHIP
The White Olive Tree - idealists who love each other more than life but that love is not enough to fix them.
Kill My Sins - they don’t kiss, they don’t confess, they barely touch. And yet the soulmate compatibility and the chemistry just pour off the screen. I was feral whenever they were within two feet of each other.
When Destiny Meets the Demon - he's a demon lord, she's an overworked modern worker. The chemistry and the ride or die and the EVERYTHING.
Fated Hearts - enemies to ride or die lovers does not get any better than that. Battle Couple forever.
Moonlit Reunion - the chemistry, the reverse role vibes, the everything. I am willing to believe they will die if they don't touch each other the next moment.
Legend of Zang Hai - not a ship centric show and sometimes these make the best ships. I would lose it when they even touched palms. They are both damaged and wary (and he’s borderline nuts from trauma) and watching them dance around and get their hearts broken and healed was…
The Blossoming Love - taking on Gods in any life and form and so ride or die and sexy and AAAAAAAA
Legend of the Magnate - it's as if Fan Xian and Lin Wan'er went Qing. Honestly, I adore them. He's brain, she's brawn, they are the most decent, selfless, loving darlings with each other.
This Thriving Land - the formerly wealthy, embittered, tough FL and her illiterate, poor, tenant farmer husband are amazing in every way.
FAVORITE SECONDARY OTP
Many excellent choices this year - Fourth couple in Perfect Match who were amazing; the dysfunctional, intense, doomed secondary OTP of Moonlight Mystique - I finished that drama solely for them; secondary OTP of Love in the Clouds - better than the mains, but ultimately this title belongs to the gorgeous, doomed, everything couple of Yimei x Li Cheng in Legend of the Magnate - a proper lady and a millenarian peasant general. They made me swoon and bawl in equal measure.
NOTP
Feud. 'Nuff said.
HOTTEST SCENE.
The wedding night makeout in Moonlit Reunion (and their subsequent married ones too tbh).
BIGGEST CRUSH
We are gonna go in the most opposite way possible: the law abiding, incredibly decent, rather rigid Fourth Husband, Perfect Match, the millenarian peasant general Li Cheng in Legend of the Magnate who made ME want to pick up a pike, Huang Yaoshi in the Eastern Heretic/The Five/Nine Yin dramas - with that deadly innocence and that voice - and Di Lin in Eternal Brotherhood 2 - the man is ideal husband, a terrifying beast in battle and just all around sex on legs.
BEST DOOMED LAST STAND SCENE
The Marquis in Legend of Zang Hai was a monster and the General Prince in Legend of the Magnate was a hero, but both their last stands were epic beyond words, and I totally got why armies followed them.
BEST SCENE STEALER CHARACTER
Zhuang Zhixing (Zhou Qi), Legend of Zang Hai - the sole decent person in that family of monsters, he stole my heart and his arc OMG!
General Li Cheng (Zhu Yawen), Legend of the Magnate - the rebel general who stole not just ML's fiance but also my heart.
BEST COSTUMES AND WIGS
Costumes: Legend of Zang Hai and Legend of the Magnate - real embroidery, and costumes that look real.
Wigs: I am gonna be weird here and say Kill My Sins.
MOST EXTRA OUTFIT
That one dude in Feud:
FAVORITE SECONDARY ML
(in the old fashioned sense of OTP interloper, because if we did supportings, we'd be here all day.)
General Yun in Eternal Brotherhood 2 - Si Yilin x Ka Dan were my n1 OTP in s1 and yet the man’s honor and willingless to risk his life to protect Ka Dan without expecting anything has got me almost switching ships.
MOST BLATANT INNUENDO MOMENT
FL gives ML a hand job (no really!) in the vertical version of The Prisoner of Beauty. No wonder it got yanked (pun!)
Actually, I'd have to exclude minis or we'd be here all night (heeee), so we are gonna go with Sun Zhenni and Zhang Bin Bin in The Blossoming Love in this scene:
The chemistry but also those vibes are eyebrow-raising in the most unhinged way!
She's a sexy demoness and he's the purest knight type and I
FAVORITE 2025 CDRAMA SONG
Chen Xueran’s Moonlight Dance from The White Olive Tree. You have no idea how much I listened to it.
Love and Crown - the drama was trash but that opening song I adored.
MVP OF THE YEAR
Song Zuer, who beat her tax allegations (already a miracle) and came back with two awesome dramas.
Wang Yinglu - who vowed me in three very different roles in very different dramas.
ACTING SURPRISE
So many great performances, but I am gonna go with Chen Zheyuan in The White Olive Tree and then Fated Hearts. He’s been solid in so many awful dramas but I never knew he could be such a revelation as he was in Olive and then he followed up with a very different but crazy magnetic role in FH.
Zhou Yiran - I've heard of him but have never seen him in anything before. But then he was incredible in Reborn and 12 Letters and I will now watch this guy in (almost) anything. He reminds me a little of Chinese Lee Do Hyun.
I AM SO SO TIRED OF THIS DUDE (OR DUDETTE, WE ARE EQUAL OPPORTUNITY HATERS HERE)
Ai Mi - girl can act but she's a minor who keeps getting cast in all these romance-centric dramas with adult dudes, instead of actual adult actresses. It becomes awful because you cannot film a proper romance with a minor, her costars (who don't have much choice) get flack for being opposite her, and she is doing that instead of plenty of other genres she could be in (non-romance centric dramas are plentiful, or she can be in a supporting romance where there isn't much focus on the ship.)
Ao Ruipeng - stop trying to make fetch happen.
NEEDS A SEQUEL
Eternal Brotherhood 2 - it really stopped in medias res. But probably just as well since doom would happen in part 3.
NEEDS SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT
Serendipity - in addition to all its other sins, this simply cannot support 40 eps. A Dream Within a Dream - it would have been much more tolerable as a 24 ep drama.
TOO MANY SCISSORS TAKEN TO IT
I don't think it had scissors taken to it, but among its many other problems, Legend of the Female General really needed more room to breathe.
TROPE THAT NEEDS TO DIE
Ahistorical girlpower stuff - where period women espouse modern feminism without being transmigrators or with any other believable explanation and without any consideration how it would fit in-world.
FAVORITE TROPE WE’VE SEEN A LOT OF
Men (and women) knowingly fighting for a doomed cause because otherwise they’d cease to be who they are. Or if we are being shallow all the beautiful men in chains.
BIGGEST DISAPPOINTMENT
The First Frost: it was so exquisite for about 2/3 and then the Hong Kong arc happened (and was not in the book; the adaptation was faithful so far so nothing heralded it) and ruined the whole drama. It negated the development, the themes, the characters - it made me dislike both leads and the way the narrative never addressed it made the whole story utterly fall apart.
A Dream Within a Dream - started so well and then was just WHAT WAS THAT POINTLESS MESS.
BIGGEST GOOD SURPRISE
The White Olive Tree, Under the Moonlight, A Moment but Forever, The Demon Hunter’s Romance, Sniper Butterfly, 12 Letters, Love on the Turquoise Land - this has been a year of surprises, so many of my top dramas weren’t on my radar at all. Perhaps the biggest surprise though is Legend of Zang Hai, because despite the heavy hitter cast, I did not expect to like it - I rarely like revenge narratives and the first few eps did not grab me (and then they did, and the first few eps made so much sense in retrospect; not a second wasted.)
2025 DRAMAS I HAVEN’T SEEN THAT I MOST WANT TO WATCH
I have honestly watched everything I wanted so far.
BEST NON-2025 DRAMA I’VE WATCHED IN 2025
This is not something I watched in 2025, but I did watch it at the very end of 2024 and it didn't make it into my 2024 list because I already posted it by then - Riverside Code at the Qingming Festival - an amazingly acted and wonderfully written drama about people dramas normally don't bother about (the mains are middle aged married couple who are small time clerk and shop owner in Song Dynasty), this is ostensibly a mystery but really a character study, indictment of monstrosity of power and an utterly tender look at a wonderful love story of middle aged, long married couple.
FAVORITE KOREAN/TAIWANESE/JAPANESE DRAMA THIS YEAR
Moon River (Korea) - I have almost given on kdramas because this year was so utterly abysmal and then comes this - a gorgeous, tender, romantic tale of second chances and loss and love and in a beautiful period setting to boot. This story of a tormented Crown Prince and his lost and then regained Crown Princess is everything.
Had I Not Seen the Sun (Taiwan) - as bleak as it is gorgeous and insanely well acted, this is a story that delves into the background of shocking serial killings. I have not rooted for a serial killer this hard since Mawang and the tentative love story (in the past) is just soul crushing and luminous at once.
Lessons in Love (Japan) - a dyslexic host and a much older formerly suicidal teacher who decides to teach him how to read is the tenderest love story you will see all year.
MOST ANTICIPATED
Hmmm: all the heavy duty historicals - Two Capitals Fifteen Days, Swords into Plowshares, that Qin Shi Huang drama with Chen Xiao, the one with Hu Ge, one with LYX and Shawn Dou, and also the idol ones like In the Moonlight, Mo Li, Hidden Shadow, Liang Chen Mei Jin, Wishing You Eternal Happiness adaptation, A Ming Dynasty Adventure, Rebirth, Love Beyond the Grave and Tigers Sniff the Rose.
CONGRATS: YOU'VE MADE IT TO THE END!!! Have a cookie. Or a hot man in chains. Your choice.
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