on april fools day we should all change our icons to this
Next month is the 10 year anniversary. You know what I’m suggesting.
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on april fools day we should all change our icons to this
Next month is the 10 year anniversary. You know what I’m suggesting.
a collection of my favorite tweets regarding the Ever Given in the Suez Canal
happy 1st bday to... this.
I personally am declaring this to be a new International Holiday
Happy 2nd anniversary to the Suez Canal blockage!
Ever Given Week, 22 March to 29 March (observed)
22 March - Ever Given Eve. Many celebrate by completing some small task they’ve been putting off, symbolically clearing blockages in their own lives.
23 March - Blockage Day! The main celebration. The exchanging of memes.
24 to 28 March - Hilarity ensues. Memes continue to circulate. The best are saved for next year’s observances.
29 March - Clearance Day. Festivities wind down. A more solemn occasion.
god the way people talk to their pets
like i’m calling myself out here but i just uttered the words “you did the stretch and now the rare and powerful double pets” (two hands at once!!) to my cat without a trace of irony
like i do not believe my cat understands a word of what i am saying but he absolutely knows my voice and i think also my tone? but also all day i’m just randomly looking over at him like “good boy!” or “are you fluffy?” or singing little songs about his current fluff levels. to an animal. a wonderful animal but a creature who absolutely does not speak english and probably only vaguely is like “this creature is communicating with me” when the strange noises come from the person’s mouth
like i just think about this sometimes
i never wanted to baby talk this cat, i dislike the whole “i am a cat mom and this is my baby” thing, he is a cat, i am a person, and yet i just spend all day talking at him. while typing this he rolled over to show off his tummy and i had to restrain myself from saying “you got a tummy?” aloud. and then i did it anyway
(he is indeed in possession of a tummy)
Considering how fight-y most junior hockey skaters are, I am not in the least bit surprised.
This is a very powerful life hack.
Use this. Use this. Please use this. There are 7 billion people on this planet and "challenging" or "changing the minds of" all the fuckwaffles will kill you before you enlighten one of them. Your life is meant for much better things.
8 billion.
anyway i looked up the post about seeing your grandma's boobs and tumblr has deleted the screenshot of the story where the finnish dude says that americans are "like that" because they haven't seen their grandma's tits
good job tumblr 👍
there it is!
my comments on that post were (sorry for shamelessly copy-pasting them):
american attitudes about nudity are fucking wild, and the worst part is that because they're american, they just assume that everyone everywhere thinks the same. i will never forget seeing people on a left-leaning, progressive site saying that families bathing together is creepy and gross and clearly a sign that something is wrong with the family, that they'd never seen their siblings or parents naked and would in fact rather die. meanwhile to this day i bathe and go to the sauna with my sister and mother and have been bathing and sauna'ing with various family members - and even strangers! - my whole life. but yes, can confirm, seeing your grandma's tits as a child does you good, and not just because it teaches you that "beauty is fake and temporary", but because it broadens your ideas about what beauty even is in the first place. my sister and i used to spend our summers at our grandma's house by the countryside and frequently bathed and went to sauna with her. we saw not just her breasts but also her flabby skin, her moles and liver spots, her body hair and varicose veins, and we didn't see any of that as weird or ugly because they were a part of our grandma who we loved very much. and when we see those things in other people - ourselves included! - we think "well it wasn't ugly on my grandma's body, so why would it be ugly on anyone else's body?". it makes you much more understanding and "forgiving", if you will, towards the completely normal bodies of strangers as well as your own body.
A woman came into my work a little while ago loudly complaining about her (perfectly well-behaved) son, saying how he was ten years old and didn't know how to listen, and I nodded along like "yeah I totally remember being that age", and she looks at me and goes, "no, seriously, he's Autistic," and I spread my arms and go, "Hey, same! Twinsies!"
And this woman's eyes. My God, it was beautiful. She goes, "Really? And they let you WORK here?"
And then she turns back to her kid to nag at him and over her shoulder little dude and and I make what I can only describe as the purest form of eye contact I have ever experienced in my life
She snapped at him to stop running around and hold still so I froze in place like a terrified statue and he copied me and we both grinned and he's my favourite customer now
One experience that has not changed my whole life is the joyous vindication that comes from an adult communicating to a kid that yeah, you're not stupid, this other adult just needs to untwist their pants
this post just made a full trip back to my dash and reading it over again two years later I feel the need to add that when this happened I was working as uniformed security personnel
and I really really hope that the memory of "person in position of authority thinks that you're doing great and your mom is wrong about you" sticks in their head for when they need it most
Round and round
(via)
The thing is that the portrayal of Neanderthals as having been inherently grotesque and alien to H. sapiens is something we will never have proof of. But we do have proof that, in different locations and in different populations across time, we all found eachother desirable. We saw eachother and wanted to touch. And the offspring were held by their mothers and raised and had their own offspring in turn.
When you look for the first proof that H. sapiens found Neanderthals repulsive, you have to wait until the Victorian era, when the white masters of empires were busy portraying Neanderthals as stupid, brutish, and (of course) dark-skinned.
In more modern times, we’ve had people arguing that instead of seeing Neanderthals as Benighted Savages, they should instead be seen as Noble Savages, (allegedly) cruelly destroyed and driven from their lands by H. sapiens. Which one of their two you believe says more about your modern political views than it does about ancient H. sapiens.
And, whether we construct Neanderthals as Savage or Noble Savage, the fundamental assumption we project into the unfathomably distant past is still that H. sapiens saw Neanderthals as an Other, with the language we use being almost explicitly that of modern racial dynamics.
But we have no proof of any of that. We have no proof of hostilities. We know we co-existed and we had sex. That’s it.
Humans obviously have sex with some humans and kill others. We also know that, when small groups of humans occupy vast spaces with infrequent contact with others, unique cultures will always form, some more hospitable, some more neophobic/xenophobic. But many cultures of small settlements placed among huge unpeopled landscapes place supreme emphasis on hospitality to strangers. Plus, we fucking love other social animals, as evidenced by how we befriended wolves.
I’m a humourless weirdo and a wet blanket about popular constructions of Neanderthals as “monstrous”, and I freely admit it. But that’s because it’s tied up in legacies of imperialism. Not only that, but it also privileges one culture (yours, mine, modernity’s) as being most human by implicitly assuming we can project it onto people in the past. Since you don’t pretend that all global cultures share exact same values as you do, it doesn’t take more than a few moments’ reflection to realise you can’t do that to the past.
We also have more and more proof of how inventive, social and caring the Neanderthals were. So I really don't believe that the Homo sapiens would have found them particularly weird and unlikeable or hard to get along with.
Homo sapiens on twitter, 90,000BC:
Can I say something? 🥴😳
sometimes I think about the fact they probably wouldn't have known neanderthals were particularly different from them
Like, idk, we have a wide phenotype variation, idk why someone back then wouldn't have just been like Those Guys Have A Slightly Different Shaped Head.
Yeah if anything, rather than being “monsters”, they were the original Short Kings.
Compare the two Neanderthals examples on the left with the H. sapiens skeleton on the right:
rebloging but not letting this be ommited
I knew this website wouldn’t let me down
Guy Faeri
I will never forgive the bots who send me fake messages.
I see that [1] next to my messages and I am like "FRIEND??? MESSAGE FOR ME???" and then I see a bot. There is no greater betrayal. Stabbing me in the back would hurt less and also be less lethal. 10 000 agonies upon me. Unbelievable.
Nothing like a trip to the uncanny valley to boost your mood
Goddamn. Okay
Did you have a kid in your neighborhood who always hid so good, nobody could find him? We did. After a while we would give up on him and go off, leaving him to rot wherever he was. Sooner or later he would show up, all mad because we didn't keep looking for him. And we would get mad back because he wasn't playing the game the way it was supposed to be played.
There's hiding and there's finding, we'd say. And he'd say it was hide-and-seek, not hide-and-give-UP, and we'd all yell about who made the rules and who cared about who, anyway, and how we wouldn't play with him anymore if he didn't get it straight and who needed him anyhow, and things like that. Hide-and-seek-and-yell. No matter what, though, the next time he would hide too good again. He's probably still hidden somewhere, for all I know.
As I write this, the neighborhood game goes on, and there is a kid under a pile of leaves in the yard just under my window. He has been there a long time now, and everybody else is found and they are about to give up on him over at the base. I considered going out to the base and telling them where he is hiding. And I thought about setting the leaves on fire to drive him out. Finally, I just yelled, "GET FOUND, KID!" out the window. And scared him so bad he probably wet his pants and started crying and ran home to tell his mother. It's real hard to know how to be helpful sometimes.
A man I know found out last year he had terminal cancer. He was a doctor. And knew about dying, and he didn't want to make his family and friends suffer through that with him. So he kept his secret. And died. Everybody said how brave he was to bear his suffering in silence and not tell everybody, and so on and so forth. But privately his family and friends said how angry they were that he didn't need them, didn't trust their strength. And it hurt that he didn't say good-bye.
He hid too well. Getting found would have kept him in the game. Hide-and-seek, grown-up style. Wanting to hide. Needing to be sought. Confused about being found. "I don't want anyone to know." "What will people think?" "I don't want to bother anyone."
Better than hide-and-seek, I like the game called Sardines. In Sardines the person who is It goes and hides, and everybody goes looking for him. When you find him, you get in with him and hide there with him. Pretty soon everybody is hiding together, all stacked in a small space like puppies in a pile. And pretty soon somebody giggles and somebody laughs and everybody gets found.
Medieval theologians even described God in hide-and-seek terms, calling him Deus Absconditus. But me, I think old God is a Sardine player. And will be found the same way everybody gets found in Sardines - by the sound of laughter of those heaped together at the end.
"Olly-olly-oxen-free." The kids out in the street are hollering the cry that says "Come on in, wherever you are. It's a new game." And so say I. To all those who have hid too good. Get found, kid! Olly-olly-oxen-free.
— Robert Fulghum, "All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten"
in a rare moment of "huh i can maybe contribute to this", i was reminded of this exerpt from Tim Kreider's We Learn Nothing, a collection of his essays.
this one was written about a deceased friend of his, Skelly, who was known to spin tales about his life to hide the shameful parts from others. at his funeral, when all the secrets inevitably started to unfold, Kreider writes:
The worst part, for me, is imagining how alone he was. This is the most poisonous thing that secrets do to us—they isolate us from everyone around us and make us feel even lonelier than we already are. I wish he could’ve somehow brought himself to talk to us. I sometimes fantasize about how I would’ve reacted—what I would’ve said to him, how I would’ve tried to help. As Kevin once complained, “I wish he coulda just told us so we could’ve mocked him for it!” But not everybody gets to be free. Some have to stand guard at their own prisons for life. Some secrets we must take with us, as the melodramatic old idiom has it, to the grave.
time to waste the last month of 2013 on the internet
Elizabeth Blackadder (Scottish, 1931 - 2021) - Amelia Sleeping