Emmie's Calm Bloug

Emil/Emmie, main @homo--shinji He/Him, Not A Boy Profile pic by @mlmryo This is a happy blog created for myself If you found it, welcome If you are @mlmryo you can always ask for nice things http://softenbieshinji.tumblr.com/tagged/fav http://softenbieshinji.tumblr.com/tagged/absolutefav

[angstyvibes-deactivated20190313]

en garde, fuckboy

[shock]

and now we return to...................................

………………… the regularly scheduled

him

[regularlesbian]

[santas-clauze]

guess the full picture

[santas-clauze]

CORRECT

[tastefullyoffensive]

(via britneydortiz)

[rainhann]

ok this is “earring magic ken” who was introduced in 1992 (and discontinued shortly thereafter)

basically mattel had done a survey and discovered that girls didn’t think ken was “cool” enough

SO someone had the bright idea to research coolness by sending people to raves which, at the time, were mostly hosted & attended by gay men. so they went to these raves and took notes on what the fashions were and finally landed on this outfit, mesh shirt & all 

this doll became the best selling ken doll in history, mostly because gay men bought it in droves. (many of them said his necklace was supposed to be a cockring) but mattel and a number of parents weren’t very amused and discontinued the doll 

[muffinsandmatriarchy]

OH MY GOD YOU’RE LEAVING OUT THE BEST PART

SO

MAGIC EARRING KEN. This bitch gay as HELL. supposedly the aforementioned rings on him are for “magic earrings” and clip on charms. These charms are advertised as totally COMPLETELY heterosexual, not gay at ALL, see there’s a Barbie that also has Magic Earring Action with clip on charms! Ken wears them to match, because he’s STRAIGHT

Here’s the issue: THERE IS NO MATCHING BARBIE. Magic Earring Ken is out here straight up wearing cock rings on his jacket with a thinly devised advertising ploy to make it SEEM not-gay. But it’s DEFINITELY GAY. (And if you’re thinking, why cock rings? Well way back in 1992 gay culture was HUGE on wearing cock rings, it was the in-style. Everyone who was gay wore one, even women; you sewed them to your leather jacket, and the placement indicated some of your sexual preference. In case you were wondering, Ken is a Bottom.)

AND IT GETS BETTER. Magic Earring Ken was on the shelves for six weeks before they pulled him. In that short amount of time? Magic Earring Ken became the BEST SELLING Barbie Doll Mattel has EVER SOLD. LET THAT SINK IN. SIX WEEKS. And now every time these wheezy old hetero windbag execs go to look at their sales board, they’re forever haunted by Magic Earring Ken at the top of their charts.

Gay as hell, Cock Ring Bottom Ken, the Best Selling Mattel Doll. Pride.

[mago-emplumado]

[unflatteringcatselfies]

this is sam, he goes where he doesn’t belong.

[squeaking-deactivated20210710]

[pixaline]

[unflatteringcatselfies]

My three legged love, Sweetie and my merpie kitty, Lucky. They’re good babies.

[imgayjokes]

[imgayjokes]

[unflatteringcatselfies]

Dilminha, she just sleeps like this.

[lucatiel]

My Printer: ZZZZZZWZWZWZZZAAZWHHHHZZZZZAAZWWAAZKADJASKLJAAKSALFJSDKLJSDK

Me, afraid with tears in my eyes: Dont say that 

[lovelypupies]

[suffuse]

I walk this lonely road. in my bag, i have a giant toad

[cherenkovs]

Don’t know where it goes, but it’s only me and this giant toad

[unflatteringcatselfies]

This is Kendra! She is my favorite sink cat and is more of a dog. She makes alien noises instead of meows and is always at the door if she hears someone coming!