Lucas 🚀

[did-you-know]

On the Pottermore website, J.K. Rowling explains how wizards poop. There’s an excerpt about the Chamber of Secrets that says wizards didn’t need toilets because they ‘simply relieved themselves where they stood, and vanished the evidence.’ Source Source 2

[w-r-o-u-g-h-t]

i fucking hate jk rowling so much because years and years after this franchise has ended she is still continuing trying to make it bad to the point where she said that every character in harry potter canonically shits themselves and then casts a shit vanishing spell 

[zahnegott]

fuck this is b a d

[postingmachine9000]

This reminds me of the hufflepuff group masturbation tweets

[gun-toting-greyshades-deactivat]

The what?

[postingmachine9000]

[drinkpisspissblood]

[stinkibabi]

Just imagine you’re taking a test for potions with Snape and the guy sitting next to you just fucking shits himself the nastiest, slimiest shit of his life out of stress. And you literally have to sit there with a straight face while fuckin Todd JingleJangles cleans himself up in the dead quiet room with some stupid ass line like “vanish me poopum” and you just gotta live with the knowledge that some kid just shit himself beside you during a fucking test.

[urulokid]

how do you delete someone elses post

[autoharpo-deactivated20221011]

I am in tears

[notlostonanadventure]

Joe what the fuck did you make me read

[hurleyquinnzel]

This gotta be fake

[hurleyquinnzel]

They literally have bathrooms in Hogwarts like theyre pretty important to the plot too did jk just forget about that? The bathroom where myrtle lives (she literally dives into a toilet)? The prefects bathroom? How can she claim there’s no bathrooms??? this post gave me mesothelioma and I feel entitled to compensation

[thebootydiaries]

friend who lives hundreds of miles away: i made food

me: can i have some

[slothgangang]

friend who lives hundreds of miles away: yes

[boomstab-papa]

[somecutething]

Doofus level 100

[mostlygibberish]

My brain, at 6 AM on a Monday: I wonder if you can order those little soy sauce fish shaped bottles in bulk, except without soy sauce in them. You should spend 30 minutes trying to find them instead of sleeping.

[mostlygibberish]

Must… resist…

[mostlygibberish]

Cons: Waste of money, waste of time, stupid, pointless, unnecessary, foolish.

Pros: Hrrrruuugruhruh, little plastic fishies…

[mostlygibberish]

I’ve lost control of my life.

[mostlygibberish]

Update:

Feesh…

[sjfhsahfkaksfhfk-deactivated201]

[noura-pal-deactivated20190308]

[mulukhiyah-deactivated20200604]

[love-personal]

[nowyoukno]

Now You Know (Source)

[oreos-in-a-parked-car]

NOW I CAN BE A TRUE MERMAID

[autisticsorey]

I actually did a report on this last year! The substance is called perfluorocarbon and because of its unique nature, it can hold enough oxygen inside of it for you to breathe it. You can breathe safely while inside it, but sometimes the transition from breathing in the perfluorocarbon and the air can be painful or uncomfortable as your lungs try to push the liquid out of them. In Dan Brown’s book The Lost Symbol, the process of reverting back to breathing the air can feel like being birthed.

[oreos-in-a-parked-car]

thank you friend

[mephistos-cafe-lattes]

how the fuck do they know what being birthed feels like

[firebreathingeli]

FACT:

This liquid is used in modern torture. It is similar to water boarding. A victim is placed in a small completely dark box. The box is then filled with the liquid. The victim thinks they are drowning as they breath the liquid in. Most pass out from fear at this point or they just sit there in the liquid in pitch black, apparently breathing ‘water’. Often it leads to the thought that they are in fact dead. It is completely terrifying. Then the box is opened and they are violently pulled from it. As said before the transition from liquid to air is none too pleasant. You might be told something like, they resuscitated you and to tell them what you know or they will “drown” you again.

You can “drown” someone and be sure that they won’t be harmed

You all needed to know this. 

[shiraae]

holy shit

[princealigorna]

That went from cool to horrifying is 0.05 seconds

[tomorrowsofyesterday]

Ghost in the Shell (2017) starring Scarlett Johansson

[sfdfddfsfd-deactivated20181001]

[ey-b0ss420]

[thefuzzydave]

howdy

[startrekdeepspacenine]

so last night when i was trying to sleep y’know it was dark and quiet and my eyes were closed but then i suddenly started laughing because i remembered this gif

[cutedatesuggestions]

cute date idea: we go to a botanical garden. you point out a flower and i immediately eat it

[memesandlaughs]

[bettydraperlookingpissed]

[goldkat-g0negrey-deactivated201]

reblog the Don Draper of getting a job he’s unqualified for and you’ll have 10 years of getting jobs you’re unqualified for

[richassness]

90s babies we’re getting old

[inso-uciant]

i don’t want to talk about it

[untrusteveryone]

SHOUT OUT TO EVERYONE WHO STILL TRIES TO GET BACK INTO THE SWING OF THINGS AFTER DEPRESSION HIT THEM HARD. THERE ISN’T ENOUGH RECOGNITION FOR THOSE PEOPLE WHO KNOW THAT THEY’RE GOING TO LOSE INTEREST AND MOTIVATION AGAIN BUT PUSH THEMSELVES TO DO STUFF ANYWAYS. YOU ARE FIGHTING A DAILY BATTLE WITH YOUR OWN THOUGHTS AND YOU’RE STILL COMING OUT ON TOP, YOU’RE ALL BRAVE AS FUCK