From the Pen, Her Lifeblood Flows @sometimesarikethtaewrites - Tumblr Blog

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valtsv

hero: IS THAT THE BEST YOU CAN DO???

villain: *choking back tears* uh, yeah, i'm actually trying really hard here man

hero: *now looking uncomfortable* oh

dreamterlude

hero: hey man its okay that was good you uh you did good back there

villain: i did good??

hero: i mean- bad!! you did bad!!

crack--attack

villain: I did BAD?!?!

official-lucifers-child

hero: i mean... you did good at being bad!

villain: oh... thank you?

hero: *awkwardness intensifies* no problem...

fagsystem

villain, tearing up again: no one has ever told me I'm good at anything!

hero: where are your parents I just want to talk

candace-gertrude-flynn-deactiva

broadwaytheanimatedseries

All the best hero - villain dynamics just lead right back to these two

pekomelon-oldblog-deactivat-blog

the reason old memes always come back is because, in order to truly destroy a meme, you must cast it into the fires of mount doom and sadly

canyouclarinot

oh my god

luisonte

draconym

I think one of the funniest things I’ve accidentally taught my parrot is yelling “WHAT?” The best part is that if he says something weird and and someone else says “what???” he usually repeats what he just said. Like just now, I was cooking in the kitchen and he heard me boiling water so he asked “you wanna noodle?” but I couldn’t quite hear him so I yelled “WHAT” and he repeated “you wanna noodle?”

Mostly he just likes yelling it, though.

draconym

Less funny things I’ve accidentally taught my parrot:

to make the smoke detector noise every time someone makes toast

to make gross eating noises at us when he wants us to share our food

to announce that he is about to poop just about every time he poops

to demand payment in the form of peanuts for every instance of good behavior

no seriously he says “I get a peanut” every single time and gets VERY MAD if not given a peanut

anonymus-maximus-er

……LESS funny??!??????

mrsbeef

The thought of this parrot declaring “I get a peanut” for good behaviour like he’s stating an immutable natural law that must never be disputed is sustaining me through this day. I was a good parrot. I get a peanut. That is how it is. That is how it always has been.

draconym

That’s exactly what he means when he says it. It’s not a request. It’s a statement of fact. These days he says it preemptively as a way of ensuring that he will be paid for his efforts. Like if you ask him to step up somewhere or go back in his cage he’ll say “I get a peanut” before he does it to make sure you agree to give him one.

you-can-hufflefuck-right-off

My question is… Does he revolt if you DON’T give him his peanut?

draconym

He used to get really angry if he did something expecting a peanut and we said “no, no peanut” because he’d been really rude (bitey, screechy, generally hostile body language) about it previously or he’d already had a whole bunch of peanuts. Since he’s started saying “I get a peanut?” beforehand, if we respond with “no peanut” he generally just decides not to do it.

He often announces something like “step up and get a peanut?” if he’s already had a bunch of peanuts and he knows he’ll have to do something to earn one. Unfortunately, he also causes trouble (furniture destruction, usually) explicitly for the purposes of suggesting “Ripley go back and get a peanut?” when we scold him, because he knows we’re going to want him to go back in his cage, and he always wants a reward for going back in his cage.

seven-oomen

that parrot is running a hostage situation

draconym

We do literally refer to him “holding the couch hostage” when he decides he’s going to make holes in the cushions until we attempt to bribe him to go back into his cage.

draconym

Ripley: I go back in cage, get a peanut? Human: Sorry, we’re out of peanuts Ripley:

fuckyeahgoodomens

Neil Gaiman, the signing ninja :)

whitepeopletwitter

70slesbian

i do care if someone hires someone to clean though like you can’t just throw that out there as if it isn’t well known that those people that are hired to clean your home exist because they’re poor. wash your own dirty dishes

raging-fan-human

I understand what you’re saying, but you also seem to be ignoring the fact that people who are hiring these poor people to clean their houses are giving those people jobs. If they weren’t hiring them to clean their houses, these people may not have a job at all.

70slesbian

i don’t agree with this logic. i don’t think we need to settle for a job or nothing, is the same to be said for women who work under slavery like conditions in clothing factories in poor countries? why can’t we fight for change instead of accepting that some people just have to be maids

jellybeanforest-a-go-go

Before she moved in to take care of her, my aunt hired a maid to come to my disabled grandmother’s house once a week to clean for like 2-3 hours and paid her $80 every time she came over. There’s no way my grandmother, who had a bum hip from a car accident and hobbled around with her walker (back when she could even walk), could clean her own house. Maids provide an invaluable service, especially for the elderly and disabled, and they shouldn’t be eliminated just because you think their jobs are somehow not good enough for anyone to be doing. Many jobs like housecleaners, gardeners, etc., are great for people who may not speak the local language, who may have had a limited education, or who came here as adults with limited opportunities. My grandfather, who could speak four languages fluently but his English sucked, became a janitor at the age of 58 to support his family when they first came to America, and his kids always advocated that you should treat blue-collar and traditionally low-paid workers with respect because those jobs are valuable and even someone who cleans toilets is a person who is trying their best. Basically, we shouldn’t try to eliminate these jobs; they should just be better compensated.

unashamedly-enthusiastic

There are like 6 cleaning companies in my local area and they’re all run by local women who just LOVE CLEANING

We really need to stop thinking that some jobs are ‘beneath’ people.

If you can’t/don’t want to do something that needs done, hire someone.

But PAY THEM for their value and RESPECT THEM as people

sonneillonv-deactivated20220218

It isn’t humiliating to do basic labor as long as you’re treated with dignity.

fooligandan

list of cinematic moments of all time (incomplete)

- spiderverse ‘whats up danger’ scene

- shrek 2 i need a hero sequence

- the incredibles; both the ‘bob discovers syndrome’s plan’ and the entire plane sequence bcs i cant pick just one of these

- prince of egypt deliver us

- the part in napoleon dynamite where the guy runs over the tupperware bowl with his car and it shatters

- iron giant you are who you choose to be

fooligandan

excellent addition thank you <3

thou-creature-of-the-deep

The kitchen scene of emperor’s new groove

official-lucifers-child

that scene in ratatouille where the critic tries the ratatouille and is transported back to his mum’s kitchen

c0rpseductor

saw this on twitter and i’m not quite sure about the process here, but figured it could be helpful to anybody who’s homeless and needs the check, so i thought i’d repost it here. if anybody has corrections or things to add, please do! the thread doesn’t contain a lot of information about when you can expect to see this money, unfortunately, so i’m not sure if it’s the fastest or best method for this, and i’m hoping maybe someone else knows of more options.

i’m unfortunately not sure how to do image IDs correctly. however, to summarize, this thread says that anyone who is homeless should go to a tax preparation office, do their 1040 and file an EIP return. if you have a debit card, you can have the stimulus check put on that card. it’s also possible to use a homeless shelter address for this process at the tax preparation office, and to go there to pick it up. tax preparation offices charge a fee, but there is also an IRS program called VITA that can help you file for free, which i link later in this post.

here’s the link to the IRS VITA thing.

the whole thread is here for anyone who wants to get more information from twitter.

tarot-sybarite

Not just for homeless! This also works for low-income people who don't file taxes. There's also several nonprofits that will do tax stuff for free for the low-income and/or disabled like United Way. Also, see this document from the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau about helping people get their stimulus: https://t.co/COsJ3C1v8i?amp=1

goddamnshinyrock

client was running late to a conference call and texted the meeting coordinator “one second, finishing up setting a hog trap.”

this is my new favorite remote work mishap

nicolodigenovas

Inspired by this post, a short drabble Immortal Nicky+Archeology student Joe (fluff, no death separating anyone)

His first theory was that Nicky was a vampire. No, Joe is not proud of his line of reasoning, being a man of science who devoted his life to the study of the past, but, among other things,

1) Nicky is pale during winter,

2) He’d never seen Nicky eat garlic, even though Nicky is Italian, and

3) Twilight was back on Italian tv as it happened every three years right after the Harry Potter marathon, and Joe and Booker had indulged in some terrible cinema while drinking non-alcoholic fruity drinks and eating small cucumber sandwiches. It was a good tradition that had substituted football matches after that time Booker and Joe didn’t speak for two months following a football-related argument. Turns out Twilight could be very persuasive and yes, Joe had asked Nicky point blank if he was a vampire. Blame the Cullens.

Thank God Nicky can be just as embarrassing as him because that conversation plagues Joe every time he tries to fall asleep. His brain will say: “I know we’re trying to sleep, but I really think we should revisit one of your Greatest Hits. What about the Vampire incident?”

And then it will ignore Joe’s cries for mercy and click the play button.

kalyug

i came here to win. i came here to become tumblrs next top mutual

relationshipcrimes

not to tell people what to do but as someone who’s been in fandom since i was like twelve, i promise that the only good fandom experience involves limiting your friend circle to, like, seven people. when you’re in a city, you don’t make friends with every douchebag on the street. stringently vet the people who are allowed to influence you. in an age of people and companies constantly demanding your attention and energy, your happiness will grow best like flowers in a greenhouse in a terrible city; a contained, curated space allows happiness to flourish. keep it small and don’t be sorry to tell people to stay the fuck out of your greenhouse.

relationshipcrimes

you get it

fanonical

dumbledore: am i recklessly endangering my students?

dumbledore: no, it's the children and minerva who are wrong

spageddy

therapists don’t want to tell you this, but the best thing you can do for your mental health is to be a hater

crimsonblazw

Lmao who's juvenile ass wrote this

spageddy

yes that’s it! keep it up!

fanonical

jk rowling wrote a book in which putting a man in a dress made him silly, ridiculous, and comical

jk rowling wrote a book in which a different man voluntarily wearing a dress was treated as a hilarious joke

jk rowling wrote a book in which women who were villainous were described with ‘masculine’ traits, essentially as looking like trans women

jk rowling wrote a book in which dmab people are treated as ‘impure’ while dfab people are automatically ‘pure’

jk rowling wrote a book in which dmab people are physically barred from entering the girls’ dorms but the reverse isn’t true, because dmab people are apparently always a threat in her worldview

jk rowling wrote these books for children

but tell me how her transmisogyny came out of nowhere?