Just Too Sleepy

Hi there! I'm Jessie, she/her pronouns, this blog has no cohesive themes unless you count "stuff I thought was fun/funny/relatable/pretty" as a theme. Thanks for stopping by! My avatar was made by the wonderful, spectacular, and skillful anonbea!

[mclennonyaoi]

i have felt weird and terrible all day. what is happening

[mclennonyaoi]

someone take me out back and shoot me like a sick horse

[mclennonyaoi]

alright well fuck you too. i’m going to escape my pasture at night while you’re asleep and break all my fragile horse bones

[qvackjack]

you arent in a pasture at night you are locked in a stall in a barn with a blanket on. bitch.

[mclennonyaoi]

ok well the blankets not so bad. i like the blanket. and the straw and the oats. dickhead.

[qvackjack]

do u want a sugar cube. do u want to chill and eat some sugar cubes together

[mclennonyaoi]

this is fucking great things are all looking up for me. a sweet little treat

[escapismsworld]

[charlesdclimer]

I like em both! ~ : )

[morethanonepage]

[i-fernanda-dias]

[iamoutofideas]

I will consider this suggestion

[anonbeadraws]

I deeply respect your commitment to making all of your characters so devastatingly, extravagantly, and truly almost pornographically sexy

It's just a side effect of being a devastatingly, extravagantly, and truly almost pornographically sexy artist <3

[sonaea]

Um....except no joke you are actually all those things??? Just throwing it out there you're absolutely amazing??? And if you say you're not I'll fight you???????

[kingcatnine]

sorry for being so weird it's my first time being alive

[skydepot]

NOT sorry for being so weird it’s my ONLY time being alive

[skydepot]

you can do whatever you want forever

[kingcatnine]

hell yes. realest shit ever said

[greelin]

yeah i’m doomed by the narrative but i have a little time to be absolutely gay

[greelin]

putting my inevitable death on pause to be homosexual for a second

[beardedmrbean]

[mapsontheweb]

Parts of the country where self-service gas pumping is illegal.

[unterwaesche]

I didn’t know about New Jersey’s law so imagine my shock when a pump jockey sprinted at my car and kicked my door shut when I tried to get out to get gas. I rolled down my window and asked him “Is there a law against pumping your own gas or something?” And he looked at me like I’M nuts and just said “…yes?”

[humanityinahandbag]

okay but imagine this in the reverse. when i left new jersey as a driver for the first time and sat in my car for about ten minutes wondering where the attendant was until a nice man tapped on my window and just said the words “New Jersey?” and when I nodded he told me to get out of the car so he could teach me how to pump gas (and nicely didn’t laugh at me when I shot gas out of the nozzle across the side of my car).

[anonymousalchemist]

me and the boys (all from new jersey) went on a road trip out of state and had to get gas and it ended up being sort of a Group Puzzle for the gang as we huddled around the gas pump and nozzle and tank and whatnot. just picture five people standing around the gas tank opening like its part of an escape room. it was very silly.

[otherwindow]

Vampires today aren’t as bloodthirsty as they were centuries ago because the average modern human provides more nourishment than 5 sickly Victorian chimney sweepers combined. Woman who eats 3 square meals a day with dessert: are you okay? The vampire who bit her:

[fifthmambo]

[otherwindow]

Some great tags lmao:

#food coma from a pint or two

#they go for countryside humans because their blood is “less polluted” only to find out their blood is full of pesticides

#saw the pizza and caption before the explanation at the top so at first i thought the joke was that the woman ate a shit ton of garlic bread

#vampire’s cardiologist insists they have to cut back on salt #vampire resentfully installs instagram and subsists on influencers who shill unhealthily restrictive diets

#wonder if the microplastics theyre getting from her are combining with the coal and lead poisoning #they got from drinking blood from the industrial revolution to present day

#me shoveling down iron pills for my vampire significant other so they can always have a lil snack

#atm my doctor says i produce too much blood #so i think a vampire would be passed out like they had a thanksgiving meal probably

#it makes a certain kind of sense yeah #pellagra was super common in the US in the early 20th century for instance

#vampire food comas

[therunwayarchive]

Georges Hobeika, Spring 2022 Haute Couture

[fashionfaguette]

Project Claude photographed by Venfield8

[animal-moments]

[deathgasmic]

“why would we make plans in front of you if you weren’t invited?” babe i was left out of everything growing up, i need 100% confirmation you want me there or i simply will not go

[vampireopossum]

[bipolar-bubbeleh]

Better make it two invites - one when the plan is made and another the day before

[enki2]

[i-am-dulaman]

Kinda in love with the idea that different places on other sides of the world can look so similar. Something something universal human experiences

[i-am-dulaman]

Like. Kyrgyzstan and Switzerland?

Miami and the Gold Coast (in Aus)

New Zealand and Oregon

The great plains and the Russian steppe

India and fiji

[i-am-dulaman]

Gonna consolidate a couple additions/recommendations from others

Napa Valley, California and Tuscany, Italy

Appalachians in America and the Grampians in Australia

Black sand beach in Iceland and New Zealand

Aurora borealis and australis

Congo and Amazon rainforest/river

[i-am-dulaman]

desert roads in Australia, South Africa, Argentina, and Mexico

Mountains in France and Korea

[fuckyeahchinesegarden]

西湖 west lake, hangzhou, zhejiang province by y19920218