How to dismantle your decluttering excuses
For many people when they hear the word decluttering the first thing that comes to mind is
But in most cases that can be the furthest thing from the truth.  Most are momma’s just like you and me, who have simply not developed the know-how to create and maintain our spaces.
It could be that we were never taught how to streamline our homes and as our adult lives took shape things simply got out of hand
It could also be that our fast-paced lives, with the introduction of kids and all their things overloaded our prehistoric societal understandings of what living is actually supposed to be like
What I mean is that -a lot of the way we live is dictated by what society has taught us. Right?
We need the big house and cars, we need to eat out and have all the snacks, we need to have all the gadgets that supposedly make our lives SOO much easier and, and not to mention all the clothing and accessories that we absolutely have to have or life just isn’t okay!
Like, we really have to have a jacket for this particular weather or that specific outfit!
So don’t be so hard on yourself for where you’re at in your life, at this moment. It doesn’t matter how the clutter got here, contrary to popular belief.  What matters is right now and why you’re choosing to continue living a life you do not desire to have.
That’s what we’re going to focus on.  The here and now because we can’t change the past, but we can begin dismantling the excuses you have about your current situation today.
Ready?  Let’s dive in!
Now, I’m going to take you through what I call The Process which is an adaption of a coaching model created by Brooke Castillo. I created The Process specifically for women wanting to unclutter their homes and simplify their lives and has a few other essential components needed to help you get to where you want to be-streamlined, feeling good and gaining back your time + space back for what’s important.
The flow of The Process is looking at-
Your Situation you find yourself in
Your Thoughts about the situation you find yourself in
The Feelings that come up because of your thoughts
The Actions/Inaction that are driven by your feelings
Your Results that obviously come from your action/inaction
(Here’s a diagram below)
Even though your thoughts are what drive everything.  I like to start with your feelings.  I find that it’s easier to dismantle your excuses by starting with how being in your current situation makes you feel.
So think about that for a second. What’s the one word that describes how being in your current situation makes you feel?
Some of your feelings may be-
Now, I want to share with you a truth.  It’s not the situation you find yourself in that is creating the feelings.  It’s actually your thought about the situation that are creating the feelings.  Let me say that again-
It’s not the situation that is creating your feelings. It’s the thoughts about the situation that are creating your feelings.
Let’s look at some of the thoughts that could be coming up about your situation-
I don’t have time to declutter and organize
I don’t know where to start
When you think those thoughts negative feelings are produced.
What are your thoughts about where you’re at right now?
The reason this is important is that your thoughts are what govern your results. Â It all starts with your thoughts.
Have you ever heard the saying “Your thoughts create your reality”? I know, it sounds a little woo-woo and you may be thinking what the heck does my thoughts have to do with the fact that the Governor has declared my home a state of emergency, but truth be told, it has EVERYTHING to do with your current situation so let’s continue The Process so you can dismantle your decluttering excuses.
So you understand that your thoughts drive your feelings.  Let’s talk about the next step in The Process and that is how your feelings drive your actions.
For me personally, this was a huge realization and game-changer in my life. Â When I was studying to become a Law of Attraction practitioner, I was totally in alignment with your thoughts create your reality. Â Then when I studying The Desire Map by Danielle LaPorte, it created the middle passage of how I get to my results from my thoughts. Feelings are the middle passage.
We don’t give our feelings enough credit.  As women we are taught “not to be so emotional” or “ you’re just all in your feelings”. Ever heard that?
Yep, I’m sure you have.  Here’s the thing!!  Women are feelings based individuals, so why in the heck would we disconnect from our feelings?  We have that invaluable
[] The “I just knew” factor
It’s our birthright and is the rope that ties us to the higher power of our understanding.  Men don’t have the rope.  They had to develop rules and regulations for the development of their personal relationship with their higher power. Â
Not us.  We are just naturally connected in a way they just don’t have. Society has been extremely influential in tearing women apart, limb by limb to severe the truth of just how powerful we really are.  Go read the book Witch by Lisa Lister and reconnect with your truth.  But anyway, I digress and all that is a conversation for another time.
I say all that to say, Feelings are powerful and drive the very actions (or inaction) you take every day. Â We do things because of the feelings we want to have.
We buy the fancy car, the diamond earrings, the sexy panties, the cake, the house, the clothes-
All because of the feelings we want to have. Our feelings drive everything.
Recall a movie that you’ve watched recently where you can see how the actions someone took were driven by the feelings they had.
Share them in the comments or review-I’d love to hear about the movie and the scene that popped into your head!
A child is kidnapped and the father goes off on a rampage to find the kid
A woman wants to be successful and works her butt of to get to the CEO position
Law and Order is filled episodes of crimes of passion
All the Actions you see going on in these movies are Feelings based. Â No different than real life. Â Feelings are really big motivators. Â Do you get it? Â Now think about a time when you took action on something because of the way you were feeling or because of the feelings you wanted to experience. Â
The other day my son was mad at me and he punched the pillows on the couch.
Actions=punched couch pillows
I think you’re starting to get a clear picture of how your feelings drive your actions and how those actions show up in the results you see.
So if you’re not producing the right feelings needed to create the right actions then the result you have won’t be desirable ones.
Let’s take the example of my son.  He got mad at me, he punched the pillows and the results were me kicking him out of my living room!  Did his actions produce the results he wanted?  Probably not. Â
So how can we achieve the actions we want to have?
If you remember I said that your thoughts create everything.  You can actually look at someone’s results and get a very clear indication of the thoughts they were having, just by looking at their results.
You have to retrain your brain to have a different thought in order to achieve the results you want to have.  You’ve heard the saying “Insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result!” Â
The concept is the same with your thinking.  If you continue to have negative thoughts about your situation then you’ll continue to have the same negative results.
Retraining your brain is about teaching your brain to come up with the answers to the right questions.
When you ask yourself a good question, your brain goes to work to find ideas and answers to support you in reaching your goal.  You teach your brain to go in “let’s win” mode instead of Negative Nelly is the star of the show and is always right.
When your brain starts having thoughts about why you can’t get your decluttering done, allow it to have all the thoughts.  Then look at how those thoughts are making you feel.  The feelings probably aren’t good ones so then ask yourself if you’d like to continue to feel this way. The answer will probably be no (or at least I hope it is) and then you can move on to the next question.  How do I want to feel and what thoughts do I need to have to create those feelings?
None of these questions will solve your problems overnight. Â This is a practice you have to nurture and create.
Start by just being aware of your thought throughout the day.  When you notice yourself having thoughts that don’t help you achieve your goal, just recognize it-without judgment.
I know, I know, being non-judgmental about yourself is a big ask.  I’m a Virgo, I’m the most self-critical person I’ve ever met in my life so I know how hard it is to look at yourself without judgment. But that’s what is required.
It’s not easy, but it’s not impossible either.  So give it a try. Just for a few days, be aware of your thoughts.  You can even say out loud “I see you” when you recognize those thoughts. Â
After a few days or week or so, you can then start asking the good questions.
Here’s why being aware and asking good questions is important-
Your brain will prove you right in whatever you’re thinking.  If you say you can’t declutter because you don’t have time, your brain will agree with you.  Negative Nelly will be like “Yeah, girl, don’t nobody got time for that! You have to get Cindy to the dentist and make it back in time for your client calls!”
But when you retrain your brain you can start to ask the good questions “What can I do to get some of this decluttering done?” Your brain will go to work to find a solution.  Your brain isn’t going to automatically switch lanes from negative to positive unless you help it to do so.
So, let’s recap what you learned today to help you dismantle your decluttering excuses-
You learned that it doesn’t matter how you got in your current situation but what’s important is figuring why you’re making the choice to stay in it today
You learned that your thoughts create your results and how to see the truth in your thoughts
You learned my signature step called The Process to help you get clear on what’s really going on with your decluttering excuses
And you learned how to retrain your brain so you can get out of the excuses and create the results you want to achieve.
Your next step is to let me know what you’ll be implementing by posting a comment or leaving a review.  Don’t forget to sign up to gain access to amazing resources available to help you conquer your clutter so you can create the time and space for what’s important in your life.
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