It's more woke to say "many men are the way they are because they are conditioned to act in ways that harm themselves and women" instead of just saying "men bad"
Wow yeah that mpreg joke was super freaky and funny! By the way, how long do you think you can hold a conversation about transmascs without implying their bodies are inherently fetishistic in nature?
It's funny whenever you see those memes like "transmasc music: uwu soft boi I wish I was a bug *ukulele solo* transfem music: *loudest sound you've ever heard* IM SLOWLY LOSING MY SANITY" because when you ask for examples of transmasc softboi ukulele bug music it's literally just cavetown. It's literally just one cavetown song because even most of cavetown's music doesn't sound like that. They literally only know one song made by a transmasculine person.
Honestly it feels a bit like one of those "le cringe girls vs le epic boys" memes except gender-swapped (except not really, because "uwu soft boi" is a coded way to call transgender men stupid little girls)
This image is funny, I'll give you that, but maybe part of the reason no one ever knows when conservatives are talking about trans men is because its never taken seriously.
"Haha, they're talking about men being pregnant, isn't that funny. Anyway, its like conservatives always forget that trans men exist. Wonder why that is?"
My brother in christ, YOU forgot we exist. Conaervatives are VERY aware that we exist, and they make sure trans men are very aware that they know we exist too.
I called someone out for making a post on the clock app talking about how much she wished mpreg was real, pointing out the transphobia in treating male pregnancy as a joke, and the consensus is that everyone knows we exist, they just don’t give a fuck about us and get really mad when you point that out.
Folks, if you don't know who Emi Koyama was, you should. Her website (eminism.org, which is a delightful pun) has a ton of her work entirely for free.
You can read the Transfeminist Manifesto in particular here. Emi considered it a historical document and she wrote a very good self-critique in 2008 (included in the document) on the subject of the Manifesto, white feminism, and the lack of inclusion of trans and genderqueer people who aren't trans women. I highly encourage everyone who wants to involve themselves in transfeminism to read her work, not because it is perfect, but because I do think Emi Koyama's Manifesto represents the best intentions for transfeminism: the desire to challenge cissexism, to take activism seriously and compassionately, and a commitment to being open and honest about where we fall short and how we can do better.
I really appreciate this quote from her, which I hadn't seen before, on the subject of feminism needing to "fit in" trans people:
Cis feminists do not own feminism. We don't need to "fit trans people into feminist theory"; we simply need to challenge cissexism in feminist movements and theories. Trans people do not need to be explained by feminist theory; we need to start from the fact that trans people exist and matter.
And it would be a crime to not mention how hard she fought specifically for women of color, to challenge racism and imperialism (white/western and non-white/non-western) in feminist spaces and in general, as well as her intersex activism, and far more. She had such a drive to contribute to, engage with, and push for more and better feminist discourse.
You will be remembered fondly, Emi Koyama. Thank you for all your work and for all your life.
"im not saying feminism is for everyone but-" the fuck? well im saying that. feminism is for everyone. yes even cishet men will benefit from feminism and cishet men should be feminists because cishet men are indeed harmed by the patriarchy; nowhere near to the extent that women are, but having a culture that is fully equal and anti-misogynist benefits everyone. have we forgotten that lifting up the disenfranchised people in society helps all of us as a collective? "im not saying that universal and unalienable human rights are for everyone but-" YES THE FUCK THEY ARE LOL
For every fragile cisgender woman who finds gender neutral language to be a threat to them when it comes to pregnancy and childbirth you have blood on your hands and you're a massive insecure hypocrite.
Feminists in the 70s understood—and researchers have since demonstrated—that “use of gender-exclusive language (e.g., using he [as the default pronoun]), is experienced as ostracism at the group level by women.” According to three studies analyzed by University of Massachusetts, Amherst social psychologist Nilanjana Dasgupta, “subtle linguistic cues that may seem trivial at face value can signal group-based ostracism and lead members of the ostracized group to self-select out of important professional environments.” That’s why we no longer use “he” and “him” when we talk about people generally, and we use the gender inclusive versions of occupations, like firefighters instead of firemen. Our language shows that we no longer think of maleness as the norm, and I guarantee that no one who’s moaning about the erasure of “women” have any concerns about that linguistic evolution. So, how is advocating for gender-neutral language any different? Aside from the fact that today’s language battles don’t directly benefit women like Atwood and her buds, of course.
You know full fucking well the impact of gender-exclusive language and it's consequences.
Providers don't know what to do with my anatomy as it is now, two years on testosterone, my pursuit of top surgery, my desire to start a family. I deal with dysphoria, medical discrimination, pregnancy classes, breast feeding, postpartum groups are seen as "women's spaces" at least that's the justification that was said to stop Kayden Coleman from being able to access them. You don't care if we fucking die as long as you can remain comfortable.
And to every transgender man who insists they're "doing something new" you are an insult to the men who have historically died quietly in childbirth without the amount of resources you have today.
And keep that mpreg shit out of my fucking face unless you're using neutral language and educating yourself. You call people you don't like gay and trans, you spread around the pregnant transgender man emoji as a way to demean or "joke" around. We're a fetish to you and you can't even admit it.
Fuck y'all, genuinely.
"Women shouldn't be defined by their ability to give birth" my ass.
Here's the article I took from By Stacy Lee Kong, it's great and I deeply appreciate the time and effort put into the piece. I'm thankful to every ally who has stuck with us.
https://www.fridaythings.com/recent-posts/margaret-atwood-rosie-dimanno-terf-definition
Well, you see. Since these people LOVE playing the semantics game divorcing words from their context. “Cuntboy” is referring specifically to a body part that can cause people severe dysphoria. “Femboy” is a presentation + a gender identity. Literally nothing in the term itself referring to a body or a specific demographic whatsoever.
Also if literally anyone wants to use / reclaim either one for themselves I don’t give a fuck actually. Just don’t use them as a slur / impose it on other people.
Folks, if you don't know who Emi Koyama was, you should. Her website (eminism.org, which is a delightful pun) has a ton of her work entirely for free.
You can read the Transfeminist Manifesto in particular here. Emi considered it a historical document and she wrote a very good self-critique in 2008 (included in the document) on the subject of the Manifesto, white feminism, and the lack of inclusion of trans and genderqueer people who aren't trans women. I highly encourage everyone who wants to involve themselves in transfeminism to read her work, not because it is perfect, but because I do think Emi Koyama's Manifesto represents the best intentions for transfeminism: the desire to challenge cissexism, to take activism seriously and compassionately, and a commitment to being open and honest about where we fall short and how we can do better.
I really appreciate this quote from her, which I hadn't seen before, on the subject of feminism needing to "fit in" trans people:
Cis feminists do not own feminism. We don't need to "fit trans people into feminist theory"; we simply need to challenge cissexism in feminist movements and theories. Trans people do not need to be explained by feminist theory; we need to start from the fact that trans people exist and matter.
And it would be a crime to not mention how hard she fought specifically for women of color, to challenge racism and imperialism (white/western and non-white/non-western) in feminist spaces and in general, as well as her intersex activism, and far more. She had such a drive to contribute to, engage with, and push for more and better feminist discourse.
You will be remembered fondly, Emi Koyama. Thank you for all your work and for all your life.
i do get pushing back on "mean girl nurse" being used in a lazy misogynistic way against a group of workers who are institutionally abused & their feminized labor underpaid.
that being said. can we not erase the fact the entire conversation began with disabled people talking about being medically abused pretty please. & also, iirc the post that first really blew up about "mean girl nurses" never said "ALL nurses are evil bitches who hate everyone and they deserve to be mistreated" it was saying "women who sought power over other people in high school go into careers where they can wield power over other people, same as men, and there are women who go into nursing and present themselves as kind and caring and maternal, who are motivated by a desire to have unquestioned authority over other people's bodies to make themselves feel powerful, again, same as men who do the same things in masculinized careers." & i just find it "interesting" how all that has been reduced down to "all nurses are mean girls")
i think nuance is always important & doctors and nurses do need better treatment and society frequently praises them while also supporting their abuse. and yet they are also universally recognized as vital important members of society & empowered to have immense control over the lives of people who are systemically vulnerable and seen as leeches who add nothing to society. and yet who has to deal with the impacts of their stress and their trauma and their anger and their burnout? the disabled people under their care.
again. Nuance! but i just cannot help but Side Eye In Cripple some things people say on this topic. it can both be true that nurses (& doctors) experience horrible working conditions and that, in my opinion, that any conversation about burnout and abuse of medical professionals needs to also criticize the authoritarianism of the medical field and how widespread medical neglect and abuse is, lest we simply fall back into "the poor beleagured doctor who is Jesus Christ On The Cross Himself, all-wise and all-knowing and forced to tolerate all these entitled know-it-all ungrateful patients!" which changes nothing for anyone.
like. look at this article. the actual context for the "mean girl to nurse pipeline" (that some women seek out power over people to control them and make themselves feel bigger, and women are likely to do this through caretaking in the role of nurse, teacher, mother, etc.) is not brought up at all. the fixation is entirely on "its mean to call nurses mean girls! they experience a lot of bullying! you don't REALLY know any mean nurses, just poor tired bullied ones!"
First, the phrase itself is unfair to women. Although nursing is a female-dominated field, this phrase focuses on women as being the “mean” ones to worry about.
like. do youuuu fucking see the erasure of medical abuse. the actual bullshit nurses do to real living human beings, which goes massively under-reported. & not just disabled people but people of color as well. god fucking forbid medical professionals are treated as anything but literal saints descended from heaven. god forbid white cisgender women are recognized to have the ability to be cruel and power-hungry and to hurt other people through traditionally feminine roles based on caretaking. like I genuinely do understand that nurses are subject to immense stress, bullying, and violence, and that providing better working conditions for nurses is vital to improving medical treatment for all patients.
but when the actual neglect and abuse nurses can do to their patients is ignored and drops out of the conversation entirely, in the name of complaining about nurses being called "mean"? sorry but it pisses me the fuck off.
(links to some sources on patient abuse under the cut since this is long enough as is)
Exclusive: Leaked internal document lays bare concerns of ‘toxic’ issues within watchdog that mean whistleblowers’ warnings are ignored — an
Nurses and midwives accused of serious sexual, physical and racial abuse are being allowed to keep working on wards because whistleblowers are being ignored, a damning new report has found.
Staff are too scared to report their concerns to the nursing regulator because of a “culture of fear” within the watchdog, documents seen by The Independent reveal.
One whistleblower, speaking to this publication, drew parallels with the Lucy Letby case, accusing the Nursing and Midwifery Council (NMC) of being defensive and trying to protect their own reputation.
They claim “deep-seated toxic conduct” within the NMC is leading to skewed and failed investigations.
A review of NMC guidelines was launched after The Independent highlighted concerns earlier this year by speaking to staff who complained that the NMC was leaving nurses accused of sexual assault and domestic violence free to work unchecked.
Incivility is one of the most prevalent forms of interpersonal mistreatment. Although studies have examined the full range of experiences of
Incivility is one of the most prevalent forms of interpersonal mistreatment. Although studies have examined the full range of experiences of incivility against nurses and other hospital personnel, very few studies examined the forms of incivility that patients face in a hospital. [...]
Participants most frequently reported experiencing insensitivity (38%) or affectively negative interactions. A majority explicitly used the word “rude” to describe their interaction. [...]
When the Doctor was a smart mouth and came in and said “congratulations you have a period” it ended up being a very serious infection. [Participant 290, 27 years old, Biracial, Woman].
Participant 290’s experience demonstrates some of the potential consequences of rudeness. In this case, the doctor was not only insensitive but gave an incorrect diagnosis. In addition, participants frequently indicated how insensitivity was also communicated through a “rough” touch when the doctor was examining them. The consensus was that insensitivity—verbal and physical forms—only made the participants feel worse when they are already in the hospital not feeling well.
Participants (15%) indicated experiencing rudeness because of their identities. Many individuals explained how their socioeconomic status (SES)—specifically lack of health insurance—was a significant factor in shaping the treatment they received:
I had a first time grand mal seizure and wrecked my vehicle. I do not have insurance, so the hospital I was taken to was so rude. I was brought in by an ambulance, they wouldn’t give me anything for the severe headache from the wreck and also from the seizure. They wouldn’t give me anything to keep me from throwing up. The only thing they did was give me an IV of Keppra to stop the seizures. After finding out I didn’t have insurance, they discharged me within 10 minutes. They took me to the bathroom to change clothes, they met me at the bathroom door, handed me my papers and pointed me to the door. I didn’t even get wheeled out after having a seizure and a wreck…[Participant 272: 28 years old, White, Woman]. [...]
…[I] was told in plain terms that those who don’t pay for their [insurance] have no right to complain about not receiving the best treatment [Participant 47: 34 years old, Latina/Hispanic, Woman]. [...]
Participants (26%) indicated what we categorized as containing elements similar to “gaslighting” or mistreatment in which participants’ experiences were minimized, doubted, questioned, second guessed, or denied by health-care professionals. [...]
…I was told I was lying about being sick. I was told that I had lost 45 pounds in 2 months because of a mild cold, and that I was wasting their time. They tried to make me feel like I was a burden, and I was taking away from other patients who they implied were sick. Turns out I was sick, and I needed surgery. Going to a hospital out of town, they diagnosed my problem within 1 visit. [Participant 275: 34 years old, White Man]
Patients adjust their behaviour based on what they experience in care relationships with nurses or the hospital care. It is crucial that pat
Most research on aggression in health care relates to staff experiences about patient aggression. Research on patients’ perceptions of aggressive and transgressive behaviour in care relationships with nurses is limited. [...]
When it comes to competent care, some patients told stories of how expertise of care providers was questioned. One patient described a nurse provided pain-relieving medication while he is allergic to that product. In response, the patient’s daughter attached a list to her father’s bed listing products he is allergic to. Despite this list, every time her father asked for pain relief, that same product he is allergic to was brought to him. Another patient described a nurse accompanied him for an examination. He asked where she was taking him to and when she said it was to Nuclear Magnetic Resonance, he said he was not allowed to because of his pacemaker. He indicated the nurse had not gone through his medical file and was putting him in danger [...]
Patients told stories of being ignored by nurses or not treated as human beings. One woman described the nurse criticized her for not having to have worked a day in her life because of her long-term illness. Another man described dinner was put in front of him without a single word, no ‘good afternoon’ or ‘enjoy’. Patients also provided examples of a lack of gen- uine involvement of nurses in the nurse–patient contact. Various patients mentioned they felt like a number:
. . .One thing that is very annoying is when two nurses are caring for you and they are conversing with each other over your head. That’s so annoying, you really feel like just a number. . .
Furthermore, various patients indicated nurses are more concerned about the way care is organized than they are about the patient’s request. Patients mentioned nurses stick to their routine and are reluctant to deviate from it. One nurse distributes medication while another checks parameters of all patients. Patients describe they cannot approach the nurse about matters that are not part of his/her task at that moment [...]
Various patients gave examples of situations where they were not acknowledged or heard with regard to their own appraisal or expertise concerning their illness and health. Patients stated they themselves felt what they could or could not do, but nurses kept emphasizing and imposing things, according to guidelines and protocols, they should be able to do at a certain point in time. Several patients felt they were not heard:
. . .I had two surgeries on my back. So the first day after the surgery, they said, ‘roll to the side and sit up’, of course that’s difficult. On the second day, they demand you get out of bed. But I felt worse, I couldn’t get out. And they didn’t believe me, the nurse didn’t believe it. ‘You’ve had surgery and according to the textbook, you should be able to get out of bed on the second day’. On the third day, they made a new scan and saw that those nerves had not been unblocked and on the fourth day I had another surgery. So they don’t listen, because that’s not possible, according to the ‘textbook’ you should be able to do this. . . [...]
When patients realize it is not self-evident to receive adequate care or do not feel in competent hands, they become more observant and vigilant. Patients describe they observe nurses carefully, check their medication and ask which examinations they are having and why. The care they receive is more outspokenly questioned:
. . .They came to collect me for my hip. Ah, you’ve got a scanner appointment. She says: ‘it’s an MR scan’. I say: ‘an MR scan? I can’t do that because I’ve got a pacemaker.’ And she says ‘And now you tell me?’ ‘Listen here, missy, you walk in here and tell me to come.’ You’d be in there if you wouldn’t have said something, wouldn’t you! The battery can generate voltage which could burn your heart, destroying your pacemaker. If you’re not paying attention, you’re done for. You constantly have to be on your guard. . .
You literally cannot find any information on abuse or racism perpetrated by nurses by searching up pretty basic terms, because the results are entirely full of abuse done to nurses. Which is important, but my god.
-_- a bunch of theater outlets are going "first trans person to win a Tony Award" despite multiple other trans people winning Tony's in the past few years.
Playbill has this bullshit to say:
While Jean is the first openly trans person to win a Tony, there have been a number of non-binary Tony winners: Cole Escola, Alex Newell, J.Harrison Ghee, and Toby Marlow.
a black trans woman won a Tony and that is not nothing! and I believe she's the first black woman to win one, period! good for her!
but literally every article is pretty outright that nonbinary people don't count and I'm mad about it
we will NOT be doing this to love of my life Alex Newell.
but more broadly, nonbinary actors in general. four nonbinary actors have won a Tony, but it only matters to the community when a binary person does it? Alex Newell (any pronouns) and J. Harrison Ghee (he/she/they) won their Tonys at the same time, the first openly nonbinary people to do so, and served while doing it
they had to put themselves in gendered categories (one other nonbinary performer opted out of the awards entirely because of the lack of a nonbinary option) and they chose to accept the award as actors, officially.
shout out to Qween Jean but was this not openly trans enough? Ghee literally did a trans interpretation of their character in Some Like It Hot. what more do you people want.
I just stumbled upon an Instagram reel that said something like "I'm probably trans but I'm too much of a misandrist to accept it" with thousands of likes (including a couple of irl friends of mine who know that I'm a trans man...) but sure the queer community doesn't have a problem with men and masculinity and the radfem rhetoric that's been allowed to prosper in queer and feminist spaces these past years is not harmful to trans men at all (/s)
You kill a racist bully that's been long term harassing you and threatening to kill you at school, you get a prison sentence that could span life (Karmelo Anthony).
You put a water bottle back, get hunted down by the store owner and his family who shoot you because they claim to think you were stealing (Cyrus Carmack Belton), and said murderers walk away not guilty. 😐
Days like this I hate being Black. You just supposed to lay down and die. No one wants you to snap, but no wants to treat you better. Sigh. Anyway, I'm sick to my stomach rn. Black boys deserve better. Black children deserve better.
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