I’m dying at that little bit of water coming out the fire hydrant 😂
The air flip 😩😩😩
omfg
trying on a metaphor
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
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izzy's playlists!
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One Nice Bug Per Day
DEAR READER
occasionally subtle

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@sp00kbait
I’m dying at that little bit of water coming out the fire hydrant 😂
The air flip 😩😩😩
omfg
Me: is this job really worth it????
My bills:
Remember when that cop pepper-sprayed students in 2011? UC Davis paid $175K to scrub it from the internet’s memory https://t.co/5prbgrx1WL
— Xeni (@xeni) April 14, 2016
Nice try fuckers.
$175K wasted with every reblog.
Let’s sure they DON’T get their money’s worth.
my boyfriend’s cat, Luke Skywalker, sometimes sniffs the carpet and then makes this face
Don’t think they want it either way. They want him to just not exist…
special times for cat people
when they’re cleaning their feets and spread all their little toes out
when they smelled something weird and make a stinky face
when they walk up to you making little chirpy purrs of inquiry
when they get distracted by a noise mid-lick and a tongue blep occurs
when they see a bird and do that ekekekk thing
when they become possessed by the devil and tear around the house with demonic speed and then pause mid-vicious-attack of a scratching pole to whip their head around and fix you with their all-pupil stare of unhinged terror
OH MY GOOOOOOD WHAT’S HAPPENING
Yoooooooooo
i walked two kilometers to hatch an egg and its a zubat this is why i cant be a parent i cant wait 9 months for a kid what if its a fucking zubat again
“These are my children.”
“They look nothing li—”
“LOOK HOW BEAUTIFUL THEY ARE.”
tbh???? chickens are the best pets??
they
wag their tails (yes!!! like dogs!!!! they do it when they are exited or happy)
love eating treats and love whenever you pretend to peck things
get very attached to certain ppl, will think ur their mom
run around like dinosaurs??????? i don’t know if this is just my chickens but they are very dramatic when they run??
make VERY weird noises,,, like honking, purring, clucking, and peeping (soft peeping, they still think they are baby chicks)
will give you lots of pretty feathers
eat bugs
you can pet them, v soft
like a tiny pet dinosaur
@noivern
additions:
if u raise them from small (or sometimes just anyway) you are Forever Mum and they will jump up on ur back and go to sleep
and preen you, rearrange your clothes and hair sometimes
dont like dealing with spiders in house? go outside. pick up chicken. hold chicken in vicinity of spider. spider vacuumed up in about 0.3 seconds.
make amusing Warning Noise when a Bad Bird goes overhead. sometimes this is something sensible like a raptor. sometimes it is a startling blackbird, or maybe nothing (maybe chickens can see extradimensional birds? unsure)
when chicken mama has babby chicken and they get in her feathers and poke their heads out
rooster is Very Protective but also thinks that maybe anything that peeps is Potential Flock Babies. has been known to bring food for goslings and ducklings
actually roosters in general are very cute. find food and go beep beep beep so ladies can find it. if you give him a nice treat he wont eat it and will go find a lady to give it to.
ive been blessed
A surefire way for mothers to get their sons to tuck in their shirts, 1940s style (via Kitsch-Slapped)
The illustrated boy looks pretty darn pleased with his cute new lace edging.
I can see him now meeting his friends at the soda fountain.
‘Fellows, check out Mom’s latest effort at mind control.’ (spins)
(chorus of whistles and applause)
‘Why, Jimmy, I do believe you’ve started a fashion!’
‘Let’s go to the Woolworth and get lace edging for all our shirts!’
‘Doug can sew them on, he got his Handicraft merit badge last summer!’
‘Never regretted it.’
‘Jimmy, your mom has some internalised misogyny to figure out.’
‘Don’t I know it.’
I would read novels about these boys
Man though you know what makes me sorta sad is when nerdy, “quiet” kids latch on to me during camp and they just talk and talk and talk about a thing they’re into (Skyrim, Pokemon, Harry Potter, Doctor Who, dinosaurs, whatever). And I see the kids just light up when they say something and I can chime in with an ‘oh hey, are you talking about [x]? I love that thing! Tell me more about it.’
Like, their parents will warn me ‘so-and-so is pretty quiet and hard to engage’ but no, man, just listen, your kid is so smart and so into This Thing, they’ll engage like fuck and talk your damn ear off it you let them. Frame it in their damn terms. Or! Just! Listen to them about their Thing! And they will engage with the rest of the material! Because they know you care about them! Amazing!!!
Quiet kids are usually that way because either no one listens, or there is always someone more dominant speaking wise in their group that always talks over them and then they give up. Some quiet kids are starved for attention and really really want to talk, but don’t always get the chance to
this is one of the greatest jokes this show has ever landed
“Why do you take politics so personally.”
What if I told you
that these policies
affect me personally?
Sure sign of privilege if you think politics is just a game or a topic of conversation and not life or death.