We're not okay

Good evening | He/Him - She/Her | Here to cause trouble :))) miilw = mutuals I'm in love with ❤️

[doomsbury]

everyone lives/bilbo stays in erebor au and it's emotionally constipated thorin pulling balin aside and saying (utterly serious) “i think the sickness is back” camera pans to balin mentally crashing out interrogating him about the gold and gems etc etc and then thorin shaking his head profusely

thorin: no no, it's the burglar

balin: ... not this again

thorin: no. no, i don't want to kill him i want to... want to...

and then him making these weird constipated facial expressions and squeezing motions with his hands. balin shakes his head and tells him to visit oin. dramatic cut to the next day while balin is having his afternoon tea with bilbo and he realises, and feels quite stupid, that thorin went and fell arse over kettle for bilbo.

[lavenderbagginshield]

Bonus points if Bilbo also thinks he is a little ill because every time he is with Thorin he starts to sweat and stutter, almost passing out one time when Thorin got too close.

[fondesmode]

I think flinching is such a hit or miss reflex. Like yea a tiny bit of boiling water touched my hand but i dont think reflexivly throwing the water everywhere is a good defensive measure perhaps. might be even worse actually

[inthesensethat-deactivated20240]

[honeylemony]

FUCKING DEVASTATING

[arabian-knight]

The hatemail game on this website is insane

[eebie]

I just ate one

[eebie]

You can lie when you name things

[cloudabserk]

WARNING do NOT start reading books and comics or watching movies or looking at art!!! you will start wanting to create art yourself. or god forbid. writing.

[cambriancrew]

[slicklike007]

Begotten Son

[skodasforge]

“It’s photoshopped” honestly in the age of AI that has a homey sort of nostalgia to it. Remember when people used to put effort into faking things?

[kaosuqi]

photoshop fakers are like the villain with moral standards now

[mayday-guilt]

Bilbo loves maps, but he finds Dwarven tactical maps incredibly difficult to read because they focus strictly on minerals, defensive walls, and underground water veins. To help him understand the mountain, Thorin takes a giant sheet of parchment and personally draws a simplified map of the royal quarters for Bilbo. However, Thorin fills it with deeply personal notes. Next to the library, he writes: "Where Master Baggins hides when he is cross with me." Next to the eastern balcony: "Best view of the sunrise, though the Hobbit is usually asleep." And next to the royal bedchamber, he simply carves the rune for "Home"

[only-tiktoks]

[britney-j-christ]

[softservecanine]

You’re completely correct. Out of my way, able-bodied losers. Fuck you.

[lindleland]

"save me, substance abuse!" i cry. before you can moralize to me about the dangers of addiction, a noble and powerful steed gallops into the room - my horse whom i have named "substance abuse". you learn an important lesson about making assumptions. i snort a line off its back

[adeebobo]

this reminds me of me and my friend’s horse named Drugs

when i was in middle school me and my friends had a small yellow horse eraser we fondly named “drugs”. this led to a lot of middle school tomfoolery around his name and saying shit like “Ma’am, so and so took drugs from me” and other dumb shit like that.

eventually, our english teacher, Mr. R, caught onto the joke. instead of writing us up or sending us to the principal though, he played along, making similar jokes like “(name), stop taking drugs.” “hey. you three. you need to share drugs if he’s going to be at the table.” “no drugs today, guys?” so on and so forth.

by the end of the school year it had become a very fond joke between us and this english teacher, so we decided since we were moving onto our freshman year, we decided to give our eng teacher this little yellow horse eraser.

so we go find our english teacher, Mr. R, who was setting up cornhole with our principal and other “big important people” for our 8th grade graduation party, and we hand him the little eraser.

to which he yells as loudly (and happily) as he can: “YOURE GIVING ME DRUGS?!!”

i actually went back to visit him before i left for college, and to this day he still has Drugs on his desk, and regularly tells his new students about me and my friends. ty op for reminding me about Drugs the Horse

[dogpuppy]

I wish I could have heard you sing this… I bet you have a beautiful voice

[the-quasar-hero]

Honestly I miss the energy Tumblr had when the first Pacfic Rim movie came out. Everybody was talking about who they were drift compatible with and that was like a huge compliment. Ppl were drawing Kaijus, and Jaegers, naming ‘em. It was a better time

[mezzodical]

[drtanner]

The image won’t load but god I hope it’s Robopope, The Robot Pope.

[themakeupbrush]

Please witness this absolutely insane video of Cindy Bruna trying to get out of a car in a Giambattista Valli dress at Cannes

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

There somehow just keeps being More Dress

[dalniente]

[indigobluerose]

I genuinely thought this was some kind of cotton candy machine for a second

[str8aura-no-not-that-one]

Shitty things about being isekaied #34; every time I use the restroom I automatically reach for my phone I left in my jacket pocket back on earth, and my hand goes exactly where I keep my knives on my belt, so I always walk out of the john with a fresh hand wound

[str8aura-no-not-that-one]

Shitty things about being isekaied #49: dog came with me but the magic field uplifted her into an anime girl and I'm realizing our personalities just don't click (plus her sitting on my lap is weird now)

[str8aura-no-not-that-one]

Shitty things about being isekaied #64: the town blacksmith is an elf named Gay Simpson and I couldnt explain why that made me laugh and now she won't fix my weapons anymore

[str8aura-no-not-that-one]

Shitty things about being isekaied #75: my degree in russian lit is useless now

[str8aura-no-not-that-one]

Shitty things about being isekaied #83: the four dark lords of this world look almost identical to abba which cant be intentional but when they line up on horseback its so uncanny i cant help but wonder if someones fucking with me

[str8aura-no-not-that-one]

Shitty things about being isekaied #94: they dont make my meds here and health potions dont do shit for bipolar

[theconcealedweapon]

[depsidase]

[james-p-sullivan]

what the fuck is wrong with this movie