Today I Am Thankful For...

Keeping my eye on the ball since my long term relationship ended abruptly.

[stayingthankful]

Housekeeping

I just went through all the posts on my main that I had tagged “bf tag” bc I needed to clean it out. (I’m almost always on mobile and so had to wait to be on my tablet.) Out of 50 posts, I only deleted like 12 of them. The rest I just removed the tag and retagged as appropriate. Mostly it was just stuff I like and wanted to share. I did reblog one quote from myself before deleting the original -- it’s still relevant but in a different way. I feel really good about this, not angry or sad, just responsible. It’s good. 😊

[lovewishconserve]

Anger Rant

So after dumping me, and citing one of the reasons being that I wanted to move to Israel in the next 2 years (which has now been pushed to 3 bc life) and that he didn’t want to go for another 10 years, my Ex is now moving to Israel at the end of the month.

WHAT THE FUCK. no seriously WHAT THE FUCK?!

I can only assume that everything he has ever said to me has been a lie. That’s not great for my self esteem. whelp

[stayingthankful]

I put on the BEST outfit, took a shot of tequila, and went out dancing for Simchat Torah. I ran into my ex twice, and bragged about how awesome my life is. Now I'm home and my brain is screaming. I can't even tell if it's the good kind or the bad kind of screaming.

Also it's my birthday now.

[stayingthankful]

Some good news

Today I had an intrusive thought that was "I want my ex back." And my immediate response was "that feels like a lie." And so I tested it by thinking "I do not want my ex back." And that felt like the truth. Yay progress!

[stayingthankful]

I think it's safe to say that my ex has ruined pineapples for me.

[stayingthankful]

I don't wanna unfollow my ex on instagram because I wanna stalk his post-BAR trip. But also he is ruining my feed with his excessive posting.

[stayingthankful]

Today was a bad mental health day

It is Friday the 13th so I guess that's appropriate. But it was also the first day that really felt like spring and I felt like I couldn't enjoy it. I think it was a combination of wishing I had someone to share this beautiful weather with, and some unfortunately timed social media posts. But anyway I was struggling to focus at work and a day that could have ended at 5 is now ending at 6:30. Oh well.

[stayingthankful]

Thing I texted my best friend yesterday...

"I saw a flock of geese flying in a V and for that fleeting moment I remembered happiness."

Ugh how melodramatic can I be right? Haha. But anyway I'm thankful for geese. I like geese.

[stayingthankful]

Why Facebook decided to notify me that my ex is interested in a singles event on Valentine's Day is beyond me...

[stayingthankful]

It still feels like a very bad dream

And I'm wondering when I'm going to wake up.

[stayingthankful]

Stalking my ex on facebook has finally payed off

He wrote that he stepped in dog poo last week -- haha sucks for him.

[stayingthankful]

Well this is new

I'm listening to Hamilton and crying at "Take a Break". Huh.

[stayingthankful]

Sup Pals

Yea I know I kind of abandoned this blog with the whole "daily thankfuls" thing. But I ended it on January 1 so I'm okay with that.

But I still need this blog for some stuff because I'm working shit out.

For the past week I've been having super vivid dreams where really weird things happen. And my ex's family is always there. Like not even him, just his fam. And last night he finally made an appearance and it was just as weird if not weirder than the others. And I wake up and I'm like wtffffff????? And it just knocks my whole day off kilter.

It's just so weird because like I don't even like his family on a lot of levels (not all of them just a lot) and yet I miss them??? Asjkldooenlcogkp

[stayingthankful]

January 1

Today I'm thankful for the new year.

[stayingthankful]

Sooooo it's 2018 now

I was having a great time with my friends at the New Years party and then someone was like "1 minute til midnight" and I was suddenly overwhelmed by the urge to cry. And so there I was, sitting on the couch surrounded by great people, and crying. And I don't have the words to explain why. I just can't believe 2017 is over.

[stayingthankful]

December 31

Today I'm thankful for the awesome New Years party I'm at right now.

[stayingthankful]

December 30

Obviously today I'm thankful for my new haircut.