Matthew

Lincoln, Ne

[stickybunsvevo]

still obsessed with how i looked on halloween

[drinkpisspissblood]

Every time I talk to my roommate I feel my pineal gland calcify and my third eye close a little bit more

[drinkpisspissblood]

Last night she asked me how many days there are in a year and I said “why do you not know that?” and she said “why the fuck would I need to know that?”

[drinkpisspissblood]

She’s getting ready for work rn while listening to the Carrie Underwood song from the Super Bowl at full volume

[drinkpisspissblood]

She keeps hanging this shit up around the house

[drinkpisspissblood]

Last night she was telling me about a car accident she was in years ago and she said they had to use the “jar of live” and I was like. Do you mean the jaws of life and she said “you don’t know what the jar of life is?”

[drinkpisspissblood]

She’s sitting next to me scrolling through a facebook meme page scream laughing and showing me literally every post and saying “what’s wrong? Are you okay” if I don’t laugh hard enough

[drinkpisspissblood]

We’re at her dads house it looks like this

[anarchohellenism]

This is like the straight equivalent of Get Out

[porterr-robinson]

[devon-aoki]

dog:

[sizvideos]

[nopizza]

He committed to how pissed off he was

[cocochineal]

I love how petty this is

[quiet--batpeople]

I hope he brought the video to traffic court to contest the ticket lol

[doing-talking]

I love the poetry that this gifset ends with him running into a police car.

[gjallarmoth]

This is a tactic called Uncivil Obedience: where you follow the law so stringently that it exposes the injustice the law causes.

[stickybunsvevo]

[stickybunsvevo]

[davidsvlogs]

when youtube restricts your videos

[chill-itscool-deactivated201812]

This bitch is so fucking funny

[grobowce]

[frantasmellets]

[ahrtsock]

[aparative]

x

[vivoconcerti]

[britneyshakespeare]

“what would you do if your boyfriend cheated on you?”

[grilledcheese-samwich-deactivat]

i wonder what MY smell is????? when people wear my clothes or sleep in my bed…..what does it smell like?! WHAT IS MY SCENT

[rupaulsnextdragqueenoftheyear]

for when your friends ask you what drag race is

[mama-green]

important PSA about when your car is smoking

like literally smoking from the engine

white and you smell pancakes? it’s the coolant. panic and pull over, but you’ll live

a slight blue tinge? it’s the oil. panic and pull over, but you’ll live

grey, looks like fire smoke? gasoline; the most combustable and dangerous. pull over and leave the vehicle, pray.

sharing because i didn’t know this when my car started smoking white yesterday and i was so afraid for my life.

[alicatchrist-deactivated2019031]

Reblogging because a dear friend of my Moms with mechanic experience told me the same thing when I got my license.

[unitedforpeace]

[hairsolongthatitlooklikeweave]

[theoriginalblackbarbie]

Forever Reblog 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 RIP

[datyellanubian]

[leofitzo]

[livebloggingmydescentintomadness]

he’s trying to use a fucking Tide pen