Caution!

this is awful

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"They kicked you out to teach you what a man is. I don't think I'll ever know what that means. They'll put a gun into your hand and call you weak until you're violent. Don't believe it. They're hateful because they're empty."

-I wanted so badly to be brave, the Wonder Years

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I need all the fight club girlies to read Leech by Hiron Ennes

Similar levels of trippy mindfuck unreliable narrator, beautiful story of revolt, and a big fuck you to the ruling class. You're going to love it. It has also changed my life the way Fight Club did.

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Hehe edit brain rot

Song: Dive In by Pierce the Veil

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Too sick to do shit so I thought I'd learn how to make edits

This is to Serpents by Grieves

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This is my petition to get emos into Fight Club and Fight Club fans into emo music.

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Can we agree that as much as Jinho would disagree, when he see's Seongjun getting up to some Villainy(tm) he wants that shark ass.

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I keep seeing this trend of talking about fanfic writers notes and how much traumatic shit they go through...so like

I want to add by saying you don't have to be traumatized to write good fics.

And also,

I think this resides in how some trauma is so unprocessable. Like, traumas that talk therapy, EMDR, acupuncture, whatever, cannot solve or help you figure out.

Instead, some of us who can't process these things turn to our art.

Some of us do it in a way that conceptualizes what happened to us and changes the narrative. Or it breaks them but it helps them to process it.

I cannot write this way as it would cause a lot of pain that I'm not ready for. However, I do it on a small scale.

In some fics I create people who are comfortable, who have normal lives but are trying to figure out what keeps them from being close to others or what they need to change in their lives to feel better.

Other times I write about fantastical moments. I get into characters minds that are so different from mine that I don't need to think about myself. I see the world from their perspective and try to get it right. Sometimes I fail and put too much of myself in their stories, but I think that's fine.

I think writing is a fabulous way to process and learn how to deal with your emotions. I think it's a great tool to explain to yourself how you see people and moments. And overall, it's a fun pass time. It doesn't need to be traumatic to be deep. It doesn't need to be good to be cathartic and important.

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Gays for the straights

Gays for the gays

Gays for mentally ill girlies and traumatized queers

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One thing that will always characterize Jinho for me is that he will say the most batshit insane thing with the most unfazed expression.

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Me: I'm over them! They're both dead! No one even Cares anymore!!!

Also me: writes 3k words in porn for them because I Can't Stop Loving Them.

Dead Friends - Chapter 2 - Wet_Floor - How to Fight (Webcomic) [Archive of Our Own]

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can you fucking believe I've been writing for these men for 3 years of my life?

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Me: I'm over them! They're both dead! No one even Cares anymore!!!

Also me: writes 3k words in porn for them because I Can't Stop Loving Them.

Dead Friends - Chapter 2 - Wet_Floor - How to Fight (Webcomic) [Archive of Our Own]

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Blue toned action webtoons with overpowered protags my beloved.

Mm yes, beat up everyone, be so uncomplicated. I hate tension, I hate real plots.

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"A drowning boy with no voice prays someone up there's telling me,

You'd better not get back up"

Besitos - Peirce the Veil

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Oh My God It's Over

Alright, so I just spent today finishing How to Fight, and I have lots of words.

First off, this was the first webtoon I truly fell in love with. I was seventeen and just needed some dumb comic to get through community college and living with my parents. It was the stupidity and sensitivity that each character brought to life that intrigued me, and the creative mess that it became that kept me hooked.

I lost interest and gave up on the comic around the first time Jinho was captured. Simply because I really did not like where they were going with his character, turning him into something very serious and flawed. To me, he would always be an interesting side character that did not make sense to be the main villain of a comic about teens calling out bastards on Newtube. (I was truly in love with Hobin and his crew until Jinho became a character, he was so much more interesting to me than them and it was odd to know he existed to be "beaten")

However much I could not bring myself to care about his little group of 20 somethings at the end, I was still very interested in what they would do with him. How would they end Jinho lee? How would Hobin finally "beat" him?

I was not expecting much. I was expecting some over the top Hobin has become sooo strong bullshit. but I was pleasantly surprised at the Jinho death scene they pulled off.

First of all, he dies because of his own mistake. He does not die because someone else was able to kill him, but because of a decision that went super poorly on his part. Like karma, the explosion frees him, but he drowns anyway. This kind of death makes sense for him. He's alone, there's no one to get him out of the water, there's no phone to call for help, there's no one else to hurt to keep living.

It is at this point that we realize just how lonely Jinho is. The people he sees as he's dying are those who could have been important to him, but he hurt and screwed over for his own gain anyway.

He sees Seongjun first, as the person who holds him down to his death, then as maybe the person that saved him. The few panels with them two are a lot to unpack.

At their core, they share with us just how important Seongjun was to Jinho. In a sick little way, Jinho in death imagines himself as the person who "saved" and abused Seongjun. He sees them in the boat again, but this time he's the one on the stretcher telling the only person he ever thought equal that no one ever appeared human to him. Only to hear back that everything he sought out was for nothing but a sad lonely death.

It's a crap load to think about that was really satisfying to read. I think it was a well done death scene, and I may have more words about it in the morning.

Anyway. It's over. Wow. How are we feeling Htf homies?

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Are you gonna post any fanfics anytime soon 😢 No rush ofc just asking 😋

Hi dude, I'm mad depressed over this ship so idk if I can really write them well anymore. Basically, I have not written anything worth posting and am dry out of ideas for them. So as much as I wish I was writing more, it may be my time to retire as sad as that is to say :(

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Okay I haven’t read HTF since like after 244 backstory crap but I have unfortunately stumbled upon another song that makes me think of sushibird so here I am again,,,

I hated this song when it came out for many reasons, but leave it to a fucked up little ship to make me go crazy for shitty music.