A Pair of Scissors, Made of Glitter

I studied HTML for 5 months and I still can't work out how to make my icon bigger. artwork/insta: @lvmhart

[withoutyourwalls]

[savethelifeofmychild]

kneeling down beside my bed and folding my hands and closing my eyes: dear god please let me have some gay sex soon and also maybe let me win the lottery so i never have to get a job again. okay goodbye i mean amen

[ratcoffin69]

[hellomelancholic]

Honest-to-god think that the Gameboy Advance SP is the best video game console ever made. Like we should've just stopped trying after that. We should've just kept shoving more and more powerful hardware into it's guts kept and adding more buttons until you could run Doom Eternal on it. That's all we had to do and we fucked it up.

[hellomelancholic]

Look at this bad boy. Perfectly square. Compact. 7 buttons. Fits in your pocket. You can play Doom on it! Runs games from every Gameboy generation bc they all use the same cartridge architecture and backend!!! Tetris!!!!!! Whip it out anywhere. Built like a fucking brick. Hurl this man at a wall and it'll come out fine. Mine only broke bc the charging port rusted out bc I lost it for like four years. The peak of design. We should've just left it with this. No need to go further.

[fuckyeahgoodomens]

Neil Gaiman: I loved Terry’s craft. Terry became, somewhere in there, before the arrival of J. K. Rowling, the bestselling novelist in the UK.

Tim Ferriss: Tens of millions of copies.

Neil Gaiman: Millions upon millions of copies. This was before that. This was, you know, he’d just retired from the electricity board to become a full time writer.  I knew how good he was, and I’m like, “This is a fabulous apprenticeship.” So, even though I didn’t have the time, I said yes, and my life, when I look back on it, I’m just really glad that I was 27, 28 when I was doing this, because I couldn’t do it now, I mean, just physically and mentally couldn’t do it now, but I would write Sandman until midnight, I would write The Books of Magic from midnight until about 2:30, and I would write Good Omens from 2:30 until about 6 a.m., and then I would get up at one o’clock in the afternoon and my answering machine would have a little blinking light on it and I would press the button and the tape would rewind and then Terry Pratchett’s voice would come out of it and he’d go, “Get up, get up you bastard! I’ve just written a good bit!”

- Interview with Tim Ferris 2019

[mariacallous]

[egberts]

They're going to cap the cost of insulin for unisured people to $35 for a month's supply. If you don't have insurance, this is the website to see what prescribed insulins are approved and to get the discount card.

INSULINAFFORDABILITY.COM

Lilly is committed to helping people with diabetes get the medicine they need, regardless of whether you have commercial insurance or no ins

[assiraphales]

petition that instead of making new lord of the rings films they should just re release the original trilogy in theaters. have world premieres. press tours and interviews with the cast. new lines of official merchandise. drop unseen content and behind the scenes footage. I promise we will all go ballistic

[wisefireobservation]

[lexicalnoise]

you can cross stitch whatever you want. no one will stop you

[robomartyr]

This is the funniest thing I have ever seen. If I were a professor I would pin this to my office door.

[zanabism-deactivated20200529]

LMAO

[nitewrighter]

There were like 30 seconds where I was like, “Ah the joke is that Orcas are technically the largest member of the oceanic dolphin family–this is a joke about the whale making false claims about its whale heritage on an admissions form, hence why its lawyer is also a dolphin.” And then I realized, “Oh. KILLER whale.”

[tae-fox-cryptid]

The best jokes work on multiple levels

[paulsebert]

[tony-the-tigers-juicy-armpit]

Wet beast wednesday IF you even care

[bearotonin-international]

We always care about Wet Beast Wednesday

[tony-the-tigers-juicy-armpit]

New beast unlocked 🔓: shutterstock leopard!

[catasters]

[depsidase]

[leviathan-the-boy]

it says the actual flavour right here :/

[paper--machete]

gonna dump 2 litres of this stuff into my humidifier and see what happens

[paper--machete]

Hospital

[niceinchnails]

What the hell man

[niceinchnails]

[everythingfox]

Good boy

(via)

[alltheladiesyouhate]

second favorite part of 2005 pride and prejudice is when lizzy tells darcy that lydia ran off with wickham and he’s like “can i help” and she’s like “no” and he’s like “then i have to go do something unrelated immediately” and she totally falls for it

[thenatsdorf]

Cat sounds compilation.

[drtanner]

Don’t let the short duration of this video fool you - it is VERY good.

[tucsonhorse]

One of those cats definitely said “thank you”, that’s a human noise *suspicious face*