Stuairi's Stories

My internship wants me to write business, but dammit I gotta be me!

[stuairi675]

Following the style of Apparently, Sir Cameron Needs to Die I've decided to share some passages of my work-in-progress fantasy novel about a shoddy wizard who accidentally manages to bring back two zombies from the dead in a feat of apparently "true" revival, souls and everything. Since he doesn't know how he did this, he can't answer any of the other necromancer's questions, which is the typically the point at which they pull out the scalpels and go find out for themselves.

[stuairi675]

Everyone knows that the natural enemy of the automated machine is the shoe. Put a shoe and a printing press near each other, and they’ll flat out refuse to work on principle.

[stuairi675]

Paradoxes were for people who didn't try hard enough.

‘Enter,’ she spoke, this being in response to the knock on the door that was about to happen, but then didn’t as a direct result. This was the trouble with premonition, which was precisely why Penelope didn’t truck with it, instead making destiny work for her by holding it to a very tight schedule. 

Paradoxes were for people who didn’t try hard enough.

[stuairi675]

Not a Euphemism!

One of the most important things I learned as a baby writer was only including passages absolutely vital to the story, its essence and its themes. All else can be discarded as mere fluff.

[stuairi675]

[stuairi675]

[stuairi675]