I'm lowkey becoming an insomniac because every single time I try to sleep I'm having a trauma or stress nightmare. I used to be really excited to sleep and take naps. Now I try to power through my afternoon dip in energy with caffeine, and I'm staying up as late as possible reading or playing games. None of my usual tricks (asmr, imagining I'm a cat that's being pet, taking an allergy pill, thinking about yaoi) have been helping lately. I'm so fucking cooked. I really don't want to go back to therapy because everything about therapy pisses me off. Why is sleeping the hardest part of being alive right now.
#I am SO COOKED#insomnia posting#tw vent#drug mention#my head hurts so bad and it's almost 2am#my stress dreams usually involve me being responsible for a child or animal#and then I forget to take care of it for an extended amount of time#something wrong with me on god#every night I'm either a foster kid again or an incompetent waste of space#would it be bad for me to start drinking before bed
