A Homely Mess

Hey! I'm glad you stumbled upon my blog. My name is James, and this where I store literally everything I'm vaguely interested in.

[postplus-protest]

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Enjoy!

[sirartwork]

Accidentally flash-banged myself talking to a coworker today.

[elusivist]

Guys 2014 is in two months

[gayvampyr]

shoutout to boring queer people who don’t do shit. just go to work or school and then come home to watch shows. while gay

[werecreature-addicted]

people are always like "Oh a vampire wouldn't get horny while drinking someone's blood, that's like getting horny while eating a sandwich" and like man have you never had a really good fucking sandwich?

[radio-jupotter]

The sandwich i had for lunch didnt moan and scream and squirm against my body and then become limp and pliable when i was done now did it

[radio-jupotter]

(Via @morganpdf )

[pupucino]

[g781]

[imperfectlibrarian]

"kill them with kindness" WRONG. chair attack 🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑🪑

[imperfectlibrarian]

This post is now about a far-right politician and one of the best moments of Brazilian live TV:

[askfordoodles]

appreciating the added context

[amethystsoda]

[soupmoss]

took a depression nap and all i remember from my nap dreams is a nonsensical t-shirt design that left me feeling dazed and confused after i woke up.

[soupmoss]

[slimegirlslugwife]

she’s right

[galaxywarp]

that’s her. the Task Manager

[willgrahamscock]

you’re not alone, someone else is reading this post at the same time as you

[fanfic-fucker]

[insomniac-arrest]

never stop the grind 😤💪

[stealingpotatoes]

zevran just invite your friends to brunch or smt you can't keep using assassination attempts as good excuses to visit them

(commission info // tip jar!)

[lordgeneralsix]

more kcd2 out of context

[mortalityplays]

tumblr group project: get better at discerning whether you don't like annoying [microidentity] people because of the microidentity, or because you don't like people who are annoying. this will save us all time in a number of exciting ways.

[mortalityplays]

R E A L

[planefood]

some days you cannot help but pity some people

[cottoncandylesbo]

they call my dick excalibur. because it sat in a lake for a long time . no other reasons

[translatingpostsinfrench]

cottoncandylesbo

ils appellent ma bite excalibur. parce qu'elle est restée dans un lac pendant longtemps . pas d'autre raison

[cottoncandylesbo]

FOLLOW-UP QUESTIONS (BONUS POINTS)

1.) Do you think OP would allow the French near their posts? Why or why not?

2.) Does translating the post add any additional humor? If so, how?

3.) Would another language affect your chances of survival?

3.) Are you in danger?

3.) How fast can you run?

[translatingpostsinfrench]

QUESTIONS SUPPLÉMENTAIRES (POINTS BONUS)

1.) Quelque chose me fait dire que non.

2.) Le français n'est-il pas une vaste blague ?

3.) Je ne crois pas, jusque là, l'anglais n'a que des effets secondaires minimes sur ma santé.

3.) Apparement.

3.) Pardon.

[reikacchan]

don't give up

[mornington-the-crescent]

[hobgobknowsbest]

makes me just think of this poem by Caitlin Seida

[nudityandnerdery]

[iraffiruse]

[grawly]

who is that lol

[grawly]

if this post gets a million notes i will buy another vibrator