23.04.26 and i'm in Vietnam
Too early to celebrate 10 years of me being Germany. It's the same way of saying, it has been 10 years of me being away from home, creating a new one far away, falling in love, falling out of love, falling in love again, accepting the fact that I'm no longer "running away" while constantly running away...
I am older, not as much wiser, but I could say that I am every day better in interpreting myself, translating my needs, and focusing on what really matters. Of course, with time, sooner or later, i march forwards.
I find myself in many different positions everytime i visit. this time was to heal, not the old me, but i current me that i recently curated due to overworking and long burnout periods. My stress is eating me inside out day and night, and as a result, my relationship. I started seeing my therapist 9 months ago, we've been talking mostly every week about my PTSD and my longterm depression. Up until one point when i needed help with my burnout periods, everything felt out of touch, i am out of touch, i am no longer sure that my therapist could still help me from this point on... I'm losing hope and trust, and hope.
Being in Vietnam keeps my head away from things "I almost have 0 control of" but it also opened a new jar of worms (not even sure if this was even the right impression)

















