Revolutionary Enby Swanmay @swanmay-that-got-away - Tumblr Blog

mysillycomics

how to have a sturgeon summer:

1. be quite large

2. use your barbels to find prey among the gravel along the bottom of the river

3. extend your siphon-like mouth to eat small fish, shellfish, and crustaceans

4. launch yourself out of the water and make a big splash just for fun

5. show off them scutes!

you can now enjoy your sturgeon summer

jewfrogs

falling asleep during the day: slipping away on a clouds so easy

falling asleep at night: I heard an ant gasp downstairs

stealingpotatoes

I followed bc of your dishonored 2 art. I especially love the ladies of that game!

ah so you were playing dh2 with the true emily mentality

(links // tip jar!)

drysqu1d

this video's meant to be creepy but this part just made me laugh. go off spongebob

#I will endeavor to improve sponch bob

maidthings

the entirety of the metroid franchise is nintendo attempting to gaslight you into thinking that you played and enjoyed metroid II

pickypicnic

carry-on-my-wayward-butt

literally nothing and i genuinely mean absolutely nothing in this world quite encompasses corporate detachment from the consumer quite like peggle_2_ode_to_joy.gif

carry-on-my-wayward-butt

upon its release to the xbox live arcade in 2009, peggle was THE top selling game for two solid weeks. within a month, more than 100,000 players were on the leaderboards. before it got to live arcade, it had been downloaded 50 million times.

and when it released for ios? holy fuck were they DROWNING in money. when they took a weekend to put the game on sale for a dollar, down from five, a couple months after release, they made as much in that one weekend as they did since its release. it was among the top paid apps for weeks.

with critics, peggle was among some of the top downloadable, mobile, and general best games of all time at the time of its release in 2007 and onwards, and it only shot up in popularity as they made it more accessible to more people. and this was in a time before candy crush.

the thing about simple addictive puzzle games is that they make you feel competent, confident, smart, and cool for being good at them. not everybody can learn how to aim in a shooter or the best strategy in an rpg. but anybodys grandmother or baby brother can play a simple puzzle game, and the nature of these games and the way they make you feel only makes you want to play more and more.

however very very fucking few people who play simple puzzle games that you can master on the toilet would be going to E3 in the early 2010s. remember in 2012 when every ~hardcore gamer~ would screech about ‘fake gamers’ who only play candy crush? thats what peggle was. it was THE crack mobile game from the pre-candycrush era.

no one who was excited about peggle was going to E3. the hundreds of thousands of people who played peggle were not the type of people who would consider going to (or even giving a shit about) E3.

but it sold like hot cakes, and candy crush was churning out content like a madman, and EA owned popcap now, so because the game sold amazingly, and because they wanted to keep cashing in on it, and because corporate drones who controlled the scripts didnt comprehend that their consumerbase isnt one homogeneous mass, they decided to announce peggle 2 at E3 2013.

but not just “oh by the way peggle 2”, no. peggle sold like skyrim, it sold like black ops, clearly they should be saving the best for last, they should announce it like it was the craziest most incredible announcement of the night!

thus:

but in all honesty it doesnt quite have the same impact without hearing ode to joy overtop of the deafening silence of the crowd. so heres a link too. timeless.

dragirlinstall

taking my gamer dog out for a walkthrough

maykitz

no! cozy games will kill the patient. she needs violent dogshit to live

maykitz

catgirlforeskin

bwunniart

answer the question!

my links 🌸

dopamine-direwolf

"Making a better burger is literally so simple, I don't know why McDonald's doesn't do it this way. First we're going to begin by craft dry-aging this A5 wagyu beef with the sho-shu-ryuba technique that I learned at a restaurant you're only allowed to work at if your parents are bluelinked on wikipedia..."

dopamine-direwolf

This post continues to occasionally strike a nerve in the trust fund baby influencer fandom.

stealmyheartaway

paws at you. whines at you. awouf

stealmyheartaway

awrruf... c'mere

stealmyheartaway

rrawrf

yugirimistwalker

Little wolf youre our last hope... our best driver just had a tummy ache

You are our last hope to win the Daytona 500...!

bluesturngold

aw fuck *fastens seatbelt*

winged-void

"not to be that guy, but" im gonna stop you right there buddy. no one is allowed to be that guy. no one is allowed to be ANY type of guy. firing squad.

winged-void