♡ sweet baby boys ♡

나는 가뭄임, 넌 비, 난 종이, 넌 시 ♡ el, she/they, ‘99 ♡

[sweetkpopmusings]

hi lovely ! thank you for stopping by my comfort corner of the internet ♡♡♡

♡ el ♡ '99 ♡ she/they ♡

⟡⋆˙this is a gender-neutral & smut-free blog⋆˙⟡

𝜗𝜚 anime sideblog @leviackmyman 𝜗𝜚

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚ masterlist | recs ˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

♡ writing + best friend svt (8/13 complete) + boyfriend svt (6/13 complete) + skz coworkers to lovers (0/8 complete) + cuddly!skz (1/8 complete) + coworker!ateez (2/8 complete)

[sweetkpopmusings]

miserable (you & me) | k. seungmin <3

a/n: sometimes you break your cyclical hiatus by writing angst that eerily mirrors an experience you are going through currently :,-) manifesting my own happy ending via this fic <3 pics not mine~

content: angst, happy ending | wc: 1.4k | warnings: none really! | pairing: seungmin x gn!reader

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

다 꿈이었음 좋겠어 i don't feel alright / “i’d rather wish it was all a dream i don’t feel alright”

it felt so sudden, the silence. the second seungmin dropped his things in his entryway, the second your apartment door latched behind you, each moment felt like a threshold. when his keys were in his hand, the world still made noise. when air was filtering in through the gap in your door, you were keenly aware of everything around you. but then, once the separation was punctuated by physical distance, you both had the exact same feeling of being dropped to the bottom of the ocean.

the argument, of course, was stupid. the conversation was supposed to go how they usually did. one of you snaps at the other, or says something wrong, and you go back and forth a little until you both take a breath and realize not only was the transgression harmless, but neither of you wanted to fight because you had nothing to prove, so the conflict disappeared as quickly as it started. unfortunately, there was always an exception to a rule.

seungmin had made a decision without you–what was it, anyway? a dinner reservation? declining an invitation?–and you didn’t like that. he questioned why you were upset since, ultimately, you wanted to make the same decision. you told him that it wasn’t about the end result but the principle of it. he said whenever someone claims the issue is “the principle” of the thing, it’s because they don’t have a solid argument to stand on. you told him that his response was a cheap excuse because he couldn’t deny that making a decision for both of you without consulting one of the two people involved was unfair and crossed a boundary. he said this decision was nothing serious, so it didn’t matter. but, you pointed out, it mattered to you, and, at the very least, he should respect that. the conversation spiraled and spiraled until the tension between you two felt like a brick wall that grew taller with each word that came out of your mouths. you were simultaneously furious and deflated, as was seungmin. his stubbornness was endearing until it caused something like this. so, rather than destroy everything, you suggested that you two take a beat. cool off, take some time to yourselves, and come back when you feel ready to have a conversation about boundaries and feelings and whatever else was on your minds without having to punch through a brick wall. seungmin agreed. within a minute, he left.

seungmin walked away fast enough so you didn’t hear the frustrated sigh or defeated curse that fell past his lips. once you pointed out what he did wrong, he knew you were right. but his compulsive pride meant he pressed on, begging the conversation to fall apart like it usually did. clearly, this was his karma for all the other times he let his pride get in the way. and yet, he was still letting it get in the way because it was his pride that was pushing his footsteps away from you. if it were up to seungmin–or, rather, if he weren’t a coward–he would turn around immediately and apologize.

instead, he pretended not to notice the silence. he went through the motions of his night, acting as though there wasn’t a you-shaped hole in every activity. he even rolled his eyes at his instinctive glance toward his phone. the notifications didn’t matter. none of them were from you. so be it. he convinced himself it was possible to fall asleep without your goodnight text. 

your movements were practically a mirror image of seungmin’s. standing to the side of the sink, even though there was no one to share it with. fluffing up the pillow that wouldn’t be used. glancing at your phone again and again, ignoring the growing ache in your chest at the lack of seungmin. it was only one night, right? maybe more, depending on how long it took seungmin to come around. you could do this. you were an adult, after all, and sometimes adult relationships had friction. this wasn’t the end of the world, even though the lack of his breathing next to you felt like an apocalypse all on its own. 

seungmin spent the night in agony. lying there, staring at the ceiling, the wall, the floor, the bedspread, while the dull ache in his chest spread to the rest of his body. his limbs were filled with cement. his eyes stung. no matter how many deep breaths he took, the tightness in his chest never dissipated. and his thoughts never left you, regardless of how hard he tried to find a distraction.

not long into his endless night, he decided that, rather than berate himself for his behavior, he should think of the best thing to say to you. he was the one who needed to reach out since he was the reason for all of this. yet, this felt like this most impossible task anyone had ever asked him to complete. seungmin hated himself in this moment. the consequences of his actions were staring him in the face, and all he wanted to do was look at you. what was the best way to break the ice without sounding like you were making excuses? what could he say to make it clear he wasn’t looking for comfort, but was looking to provide it? what was the point of being a successful musician if you couldn’t even figure out what to say to your partner?

sunlight crept between the curtains. the shift in the air relieved some of the pressure on seungmin’s chest, enough for him to reach over and grab his phone. instead of letting himself sink back into his mental pity party, he typed out the best message he could come up with: i’m sorry. can i please call you?

a lightness emerged in his body when, a few minutes later, his phone buzzed with yes. you had said this simple word to him many times before, but this was quite possibly one of his favorites.

the phone ringing sounded far too loud in the fresh dawn, so you answered just after the first ring, “hi, seungmin.”

“hi, y/n,” seungmin sighed, “i hope i didn’t wake you.”

you shook your head, and then remembered he couldn’t see you, “no, it’s okay. i…i couldn’t sleep.”

he chuckled, “yeah, me neither.”

you hummed in agreement. seungmin fiddled with the fabric of his blanket, wracking his brain for something to say.

“i am sorry. like, really sorry, you know? i…” he swallowed, furrowed his brow, rearranged the words so they came out correct this time, “i was wrong. how are you feeling?”

it was as simple as that. everything from the night before, even from the moments before his message, melted away. your own pride meant you wanted to stay mad, to prove a point. but what was there to prove? the person you cared about the most in the world was extending an olive branch, and you wanted nothing more than to reach out and grab his hand instead.

“i’m okay. well, you know what i mean,” you heard seungmin hum in agreement, “i feel a bit better now. thank you.”

“it feels unfair for you to be thanking me when all i’m doing is giving you the bare minimum of what you deserve.”

you laughed softly, “hmm, i guess you’re right. what would you need to do to deserve my thanks?”

“i think that’s for you to decide. but, maybe i could start by bringing you breakfast?”

“i like the sound of that.”

your smile was audible through your voice, your warmth strong enough to wrap around seungmin from just your voice in the phone. seungmin couldn’t stop smiling either.

“text me what you’d like, and i’ll be there as soon as i can.”

“or we could stay on the phone and chat? it feels like i haven’t talked to you in forever…”

the gentleness of your request split seungmin’s heart in two. if he hadn’t loved you more than everything before, he certainly did now.

“i feel the exact same way.”

there was a pause, and you both relished in the sound of your breaths syncing once again. then, as if you hadn’t just spent a night in your own separate agonies, you fell into the rhythm of your conversation, a new day and a stronger relationship dawning between you two.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[sweetkpopmusings]

miserable (you & me) | y. jeongin <3

a/n: and we're back (sort of)! my life is...entirely different since i last posted on here (hence the random hiatus in writing), but i simply cannot leave this series unfinished. please enjoy some angsty jeongin content (with a happy ending of course) <3 pics not mine~

content: angst, happy ending | wc: 1.5k | warnings: none really! | pairing: jeongin x gn!reader

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

집 밖은 너무 차가워 돌아가 네게 바보같이 / “it’s too cold outside i return to you like a fool”

jeongin’s hands trembled while he watched his breath swirl around the air in front of him. the time between his i’m here message and you opening the door felt like an eternity, or at least a few centuries of agony. a soft smile graced his features when your eyes connected with his. you returned a small smile, mostly out of instinct, stepping to the side to let him in. even though jeongin knew these motions were a habit, he pretended that you were as comforted by his presence as he was by yours. he pretended that things were what they used to be.

discarding his shoes and jacket, he followed you to the couch, your blanket discarded and drink half-finished. you had been watching tv when he texted you an almost expected are you busy? you, unsurprisingly, replied not really. want to come over?

colder days often brought you two together, and, despite the recent fights before tonight and attempts at minimal contact since, he ended up here again. the silence that remained between you two proved that something was different, as did the gap between your spots on the sofa. 

jeongin hated angst. he hated any situation that could be described as angsty, and he hated feeling it a million times more. he never believed in being half-hearted in relationships. he was all-in, all the time. yet, things with you were unclear. one small fight turned into a handful of bigger fights. you said you needed time to think, and jeongin said he’d give you space. tonight, however, he couldn’t handle the space. life was stressful, and, without you, he felt completely disoriented. these days, more often than not, he felt like he was floating aimlessly, unable to touch the ground without you there to greet him. jeongin respected your wishes, but, right now, he needed you. honestly, he always needed you. which is why he kept coming back, in spite of his promises to stay away. he felt better with you around, even if you felt far away as you did now, sitting on the opposite end of the couch.

“thank you for letting me come over,” he whispered.

you nodded, “yeah, no problem. what’ve you…” you glanced at him briefly, heart aching at his slumped shoulders, “are you okay?”

he winced at the discomfort in your voice. how could he be the reason you weren’t comfortable? how could your endlessly flowing conversations turn into stilted questions in the span of a few weeks? how could you still treat him with care when he couldn’t find it in himself to do the one thing you asked? how could you worry about him when he didn’t deserve to take up the space you needed, the space he promised to give you? 

“it was just a hard day. you know how it is,” jeongin shrugged.

you sighed. jeongin could never lie to you, and this was a lame attempt at masking his pain. part of you wanted to take the out and not pry any further, avoid comforting him like you always did. but the other part of you, the part that cared for jeongin so deeply, knew you wouldn’t be able to sleep if you didn’t know what was on his mind.

“innie,” you turned to face him fully, “what’s going on?”

jeongin swore he could have broken down right then and there, hearing you call his name sweetly. it was the closest he had felt to you in ages. he swallowed hard, pushing back the tears that came with the overwhelming feeling of safety you gave him again and again, even when he knew he didn’t deserve it.

“it’s nothing really. it’s that, well,” jeongin sighed, the frustration he felt toward himself abundantly clear, “i hate this. i hate that, after all the fights, all i can think about is how much i miss you and how i’m not supposed to be near you. i’m not saying i don’t respect your space; hell, the more time i spend with my thoughts, the more i understand why you asked for it. i think what i’m trying to say is…”

jeongin paused. he knew he couldn’t half-explain himself if he had any desire to get out of this ambiguous stage of your relationship. but he also knew that he couldn’t just dump everything on you without thinking it through. so he stopped talking to look at you. to see the evidence of your own exhaustion, your own confusion. if his heart wasn’t already broken, it was certainly shattered now, seeing how the time apart had taken a toll on you too. it wasn’t fair, any of it. but, jeongin knew that, one way or another, tonight had to end with some clarity. even if it wasn’t the answer he wanted, he needed to hear it.

“i can’t do this. i can’t have us be half in a relationship, half out of it. i tell myself that the space is temporary, but i don’t even know that for sure. so it’s like i’m spiraling every second of the day, wondering over and over again what’s going to happen to us. maybe this makes me a jerk who is pressuring you to sort out your feelings quicker than you can, but it hurts too much for me to keep going like this. on nights like tonight, i feel like i’m going crazy. and i know it’s unfair, but the only way for me stay sane is to be next to you. i’m sorry. i’m sure it doesn’t seem genuine, and i’m sure i’m being the most selfish person in the world right now. but i mean it. i am sorry. i just…i really miss you.” 

you felt the urge to hold him so deeply at that moment that you almost threw away everything you’d been feeling. one of the most difficult things was keeping your hands in your lap, but you did it. because you knew that, if your relationship were to get better, you had to start by not immediately fixing his problem by disregarding your own. even if it meant he had to hurt a little longer. even if it meant you had to hurt a little longer.

“what do you want me to say, jeongin? i asked you for space because i needed that to sort out my thoughts. it’s hard to do that when you keep asking to come over, just to sit in this uncomfortable silence for a few hours until i go to bed and you go home. it’s not that i don’t want to see you, but i…why do you keep coming over?”

jeongin frowned. he’d be lying if he said that question didn’t hurt his heart. but he understood. every time he asked to come back to you, he was breaking the no-contact rule. there was no way to answer without revealing everything. jeongin hated sentimental confessions almost as much as he hated angst, but, for you, always for you, he’d make an exception.

“i’m sorry. again, i know that can’t mean much when i keep breaking the promise to give you space, but it’s true. i…i’m so lonely without you, and i feel lost. y/n, i know i had a part in us turning into this. i want to be a part of the solution too. please, even if only for tonight, tell me what i can do. even if you stop feeling the way you felt before all of this, i want you to know that i’d follow you to the ends of the earth. ever since i met you, i don’t know how to do anything other than be with you. i don’t want to be anything except be there for you. you’ve been there for me, so many times, and you continue to be there for me on nights like this. i guess what i’m trying to say is…” jeongin sighed, running a frustrated hand through his hair, “i’m sorry, and i love you.”

leave it to jeongin to make your desire for space disappear with a late-night confession. he could be puzzling and frustrating, but he was always, always genuine. his earnestness is why you kept opening that door for him on cold nights, even when you were so upset that you didn’t want to admit that it felt colder without him by your side. 

“okay,” you whispered.

the tone of your voice gave jeongin a burst of hope, the first lightness he felt in his chest in far too long, “okay?”

you nodded, “i still need a little more time to figure out exactly how i feel and what i need. but i understand how this limbo isn’t helping either of us. you can stay tonight. tomorrow, i’ll need you to follow the no-contact rule. then, the next day, i’ll have my answer.”

jeongin nodded, solemnly agreeing to this plan, even if there was a chance it all ended with you going your separate ways. 

“thank you,” he stopped to make sure you saw how serious he was, “i really mean it. thank you.”

instead of saying anything massive, you reached out your hand. jeongin wrapped his fingers around yours embarrassingly quickly, nearly jumping out of his seat when you asked, “do you want to watch a movie?”

jeongin realized he had never wanted to say “yes” more to anything in his life.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[sweetkpopmusings]

Omg hi! I saw your name pop up in my notifs! Nice to see you! Hope you've been well!! :))

omg hello lovely!!! you're so sweet to drop a message :,-) what a lovely surprise, especially since i love seeing you on my dash! so nice to see you too, and i hope you have quite literally the best day of your life <3333

[sweetkpopmusings]

asking best friend enhypen to be your fake boyfriend <3

a/n: el not take a 6 month hiatus challenge failed again </3 wanted to try something new, so please enjoy my first ever fake texts !! my eyes hurt from staring at my figma board for hours but it was v fun so more to come~

content: fluff, bestfriend!enhypen | warnings: mentions of men being creeps, jay (and me) being delulu, slight suggestiveness in sunghoon's, silliness all around | pairing: bestfriend!enhypen x gn!reader | requests: open

[sweetkpopmusings]

hongjoong coworker headcanons <3

a/n: a whole bunch of people got laid off at my company today, so it only seems right that i cope by escaping into thoughts of coworker!ateez <3 please enjoy the precious gem that is coworker!hongjoong :,-) pics not mine~

content: fluff, nonidol!au | wc: 1k | warnings: none really! one mention of food | pairing: coworker!hongjoong x gn!reader | requests: open

everyone, and i mean absolutely everyone, wants to be mentored by hongjoong

they don’t care if they aren’t even in the same department as hongjoong

they just KNOW that he is the best ally and support system to have in the office

everyone also says his face is a workplace perk most people are too scared to say thing within earshot of hongjoong lmao

hongjoong knows everything people say about him, but he doesn’t let on

instead, he simply does his job and minds his business

things change when you start working at the company

you were hired in not only the same department, but same team as hongjoong

so your supervisor assigned hongjoong as your mentor

hongjoong, ever the professional, happily accepts and promises to train you well, so you can succeed in your new role

this all happens before you have a chance to learn hongjoong’s lore at the office

so you are wildly confused by the shocked and jealous stares from your coworkers as hongjoong walks you to your desk

it also feels suspicious that seemingly everybody is walking by your desk while hongjoong gives you a brief introduction to workflows, programs, etc.

but you, like hongjoong, are just trying to mind your business and do your job

which is actually super easy because hongjoong knows every single hack, automation, etc that means you can get your work done without being slowed down by tedious tasks

he’s a genius but so casual about it that you’re just sitting there like :-0 ??? how does he know everything ???

he chuckles when he sees your face and assures you that it’s just because he’s been there for ages and that soon enough you’ll be exactly the same way

you doubt it but appreciate his confidence in you LOL

at the end of your first week, hongjoong offers to take you to lunch

he says your boss is paying for it because it is “team bonding” so you agree 

what you didn’t know was that this team bonding would include hongjoong spilling ALL the tea in the office

he wasn’t gossiping in a cruel way, but he felt it was his duty, as your mentor, to give context on all the looks you were receiving

hongjoong finds it hilarious and adorable when you look at him with an absolutely shocked face

he just sits back while it sinks in for you, and, based on your reaction, hongjoong knows for sure that he finally has a friend in the office

he can tell that you won’t treat him like he’s different, which is a massive relief for him

so, from that day on, he makes it his mission to be both an amazing mentor AND a good friend

he stops by your desk for little check-ins and spends his breaks with you, whether sipping on coffee or walking around outside

hongjoong remembers everything you tell him about your life like he’s an incredible listener

you joke that it’s creepy he pays SO much attention to every detail you share and he says his resume didn’t say “detailed-oriented” for nothing

that is the moment you realize he is a complete dork LOL

speaking of dorky hongjoong

whenever he offers you a “cheer up!” or “you’ve got this!” it feels so much like a proud parent cheering on their child

he complains when you say this because “at least i should be an older brother but a DAD?!?!”

hongjoong is sulky but that goes away as soon as you buy him his favorite drink

you also changed his contact to “dad” but he doesn’t need to know that <3

he isn’t beating the dad/older brother allegations any time soon because he nags you once he gets comfortable with you 

it’s always with a smile on his face and full of care

but he will nag you about keeping your desk clean, using better handwriting, making your presentations more stylistic, etc

like sorry when did he become a judge instead of a mentor ???

it’s okay though because he lets you return the favor by nagging him constantly <3

hongjoong pretends not to like it when you nag him, but it fills his heart because that means you’re comfortable with him too :,-)

it also adds to everyone’s jealousy because you two are CLEARLY close and hongjoong finds their envy ridiculous and hilarious 

he definitely brags about how close you two are like he thinks you’re incredible and that everyone should be jealous they don’t know you like he does

somehow dating rumors start of course and when asked about it, you and hongjoong always reply with “wouldn’t you like to know”

hongjoong made you promise to give that answer because he thinks it’s fun to mess with everyone LMAO

he has so much fun with you that, to show his appreciation, hongjoong gets you a gift for your one-year anniversary at the company, including a handwritten note

he makes you promise not to open it while he’s with you because he doesn’t want either of you to feel awkward

later, once you read the note, you understand exactly why he requested this

the note starts with him praising your work ethic and improvement because he’s a proud mentor :,-)

at the end, he confesses that, before you started working there, he felt pretty isolated

it was like he was on an island or in a fish bowl, being watched from afar by everyone else

after that first lunch, and the many, many conversations you shared afterward, hongjoong finally felt like he belonged there

you made hongjoong feel like he belonged

that was something he was immensely grateful for, so he promised to pay you back by supporting you as a coworker and person, so you never felt like you were alone or an outsider

hongjoong tries to play it off the next time he sees you, but the sparkle in his eye when you thank him for being such a good colleague and friend reveals just how much he cherishes you in the workplace and beyond <333

[sweetkpopmusings]

minghao best friend headcanons <3

a/n: given how SLAY minghao's comeback was, i needed to honor him by posting something. he is an absolute gem, so hopefully these hcs reflect the joy and appreciation minghao brings me :,-) pics not mine <3

content: fluff | wc: 0.9k | warnings: none! | pairing: bestfriend!minghao x gn!reader | requests:open

where to even begin with the AMAZING best friend minghao??

as a best friend, he is ALL heart. super caring, kind, and warm <3

with plenty of sass to balance out all the sappiness

he’s like a wise but playful elder why do i feel like he’d hate me comparing him to an elder…sorry minghao

he simultaneously knows what’s best for you while constantly making things lighthearted through jokes, silly conversations, and nonstop giggling

you’ll always have the time of your LIFE with minghao by your side

he is equal parts joy and peace

friendship with him is the perfect balance of being uplifted and grounded

every time you comment on this aspect of him, he always says it is because of you 

usually you two playfully argue about who is the one making everything so calm and secure until you agree that it is thanks to both of you

minghao finds these little debates endearing because it’s a way for him to express his love and appreciation for you without the tone being too serious

he doesn’t shy away from serious conversations, though

communication is very important to him, and he is always willing to dedicate time and emotional space for you, whether that’s a check-in over the phone or a whole night discussing what’s going on in your lives/relationship

truly, no one could be more attuned to your needs and moods than minghao because he has spent your entire friendship observing you and learning everything there is to know

you, of course, have done the exact same, so you two basically have a special intuition about each other :,-) 

it is incredibly special, and everyone is EXTREMELY jealous of your bond

because you two are naturally a perfect fit AND you both put in the work to keep yourselves aligned with each other

minghao holds himself to high standards of friendship which means that, while he may require a lot of things to be closest friend, he 100% returns the favor and is always working to be his best self with you 

given how much effort he puts into loving and caring for you, he is not afraid to tell you if he thinks other people in your life are not treating you the way you deserve

whether it’s a partner, friend, coworker, etc., minghao will not stand any subpar behavior of those in your life

he knows how valuable you are and refuses to let that be diminished or ignored

he is always, always respectful when he discusses these things with you though

like he is stern sometimes very stubborn but he is so very kind

he loves and cherishes you more than anything, after all <3333

minghao also fully listens if you comment on how other people are treating him

in his eyes, your words should be 100% believed, even if he disagrees with them from time to time

because you of all people know his heart, so who is he to doubt your thoughts and feelings?

at the end of the day, it isn’t about which of you is right. it’s about you two being cared for and safe, and minghao always trusts that you will fight for his safety and wellbeing 

truly, you two are each other’s fiercest protectors

everyone, and i mean EVERYONE, knows that 

no one crosses you, not even to tease you lightly, because minghao will attack them like a guard dog

rip to chan that ONE time he made the mistake of teasing you too much

like he survived but minghao really terrified him to his core LOL

minghao regrets nothing though <3 he’ll do anything for you <3

his members are also jealous of the way he looks at you with such kindness and care

when they complain about it, minghao just glares at them so they give up quickly LMAO

of course, we cannot forget the style and fashion perks of having minghao as your best friend

he is never one to force a specific style on someone else. rather, he supports you in finding and expressing your own style

minghao wants you to feel beautiful and confident 25/8, and he knows that how you dress, do your hair, and adjust your appearance really contributes to a powerful sense of self 

he is down to go through your closet with you, find unique thrifted items, or even take you on shopping sprees for special occasions aka any time he wants to treat you to something special

he also LOVES to give you some of his accessories to borrow and/or keep :,-)

he gets a sense of pride when he sees his influence and personality in your style

to him, it is a reflection that he really is an important person to you

so he makes it a point to intentionally reflect parts of you and your style in how he expresses himself

minghao views it as an act of gratitude for your overall influence on his life

and, admittedly, he ADORES it when you two stand out together

nothing fills him with confidence quite like the way people turn their heads when you two walk by

he also never feels more grounded and energized than when you two are doing wellness activities or self-care together

the first time you two did facemasks together, minghao SWORE his skin had never been so bright

you thought he was being dramatic, but there is something to the happiness you two bring each other :,-)

[sweetkpopmusings]

miserable (you & me) | h. jisung <3

a/n: jisung unlocks a part of me that is deeply emotional and romantic like ...... i love and cherish him so much :-( i really got in my feels with this one, and i hope you enjoy a glimpse into what i think being loved by jisung is like <3 also yes i gave him my favorite lyric of the song as a treat because his lyrics pull me apart and put me back together every time :,-) pics not mine~

content: angst, happy ending | wc: 1.3k | warnings: none really! | pairing: jisung x gn!reader | requests:open

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

“i don’t wanna lose a part of me, you are my heart, you know?”

jisung couldn’t believe he was living out an overplayed scene in every book, movie, song, and tv show ever created. maybe some clichés were just universal experiences. if that were true, staring out blankly at flashing lights on the tarmac after the plane touches the ground must be a rite of passage for every modern human. his body barely registered the number of hours suspended in the air, as his mind only focused on one thing: you. if asked about the music he listened to during the flight, he wouldn’t know how to answer. truthfully, he didn’t listen to anything other than the internal chant of your name mixed with alternate beats of i’m sorry and i wish i said so sooner. 

jisung barely survived the past few weeks. existing with love and heartbreak in one body simultaneously sounds made-up, but that was jisung’s reality after he walked away that night. a reality he created and regretted more than anything.

it was classic. both of you were stressed from too many things going wrong in your lives, and the agitation bled into your conversations and actions. even your facial expressions were tinged with negative emotions not meant for each other. then, as it so often happened, one wrong sentence ruined everything. 

you knew jisung didn’t mean it when he said “if you’re so unhappy every time you see me, then why do you keep inviting me over?” 

but he said it, and you heard it, and it hurt. 

though jisung’s face fell at the sound of his words, all you could think to say was, “i think you should go. you have an early flight tomorrow.”

jisung stood there, mouth open, waiting for words–the right ones–to come out of his mouth. the silence hung in the air for too long. he saw your eyes glistening with tears, and he didn’t want his presence to be the reason the tears fell. again, out of exhaustion and fear of a fight, he said the wrong thing.

“okay, i’ll go.”

jisung’s heart broke when all you replied was, “safe travels.”

neither of you made a promise to see each other after jisung returned. both of you assumed you would see each other as soon as he was back, but both of you feared that the other person wouldn’t want to reunite. somehow words unsaid weighed on both of you more than the misspoken ones. but it felt too late. neither of you knew if continuing the conversation tonight was right, so neither of you said anything. jisung’s plane took him away the next morning, and you couldn’t find the courage to close the distance between you two any time soon.

that fear hung over jisung for the entire trip. it ate him up inside, yet he didn’t have the courage to face it. for weeks, he felt frozen. then, perhaps from the adrenaline of finally being in the same city as you again, he found the courage.

as soon as he unlocked his front door, jisung threw his bag on the floor, and, without a second thought, he turned on his heel and rushed to your place. he didn’t care if he had to wait at your doorstep all night and well into the morning. jisung could not, would not rest until he apologized to your face. you deserved that. if his words were what hurt you, then you deserved a million more kind words from him until you were healed. 

his heart was about to burst out of his chest during the seconds between his knock on your door and you pulling it open. you were so beautiful to jisung, and your beauty became more profound when he saw you again. he felt he could cry looking at you in your doorway. even he hadn’t realized how deeply he had missed you until you were within arms’ reach. 

everything had felt so far away for so long, but, with you, finally, jisung felt connected to everything around him. he felt like he could breathe for the first time when he heard your soft hello. he felt the world start spinning again when you said his name. he felt his heartbeat return to his chest, replacing the dull ache that had filled it since he turned his back to you that night. 

“i’m sorry.”

a small, instinctive smile flickered on your face at the sound of his voice, “come inside.”

jisung nodded, shaking from the desire to spill his heart out to you. thankfully, you sensed this, and you gave him the space to make things right again.

“i’m so, so sorry, y/n. i know i shouldn’t have left that night like that, and i know i should’ve apologized sooner. there are so many things to say to you, and you don’t owe it to me to listen. i just need you to know i’m sorry and i regret what i said and did that night. you didn’t deserve that.”

jisung paused. he held your gaze, eyes very clearly filling with tears. he waited for your permission to continue speaking, which you gave with a nod. he blinked, took a deep breath, and filled himself with equal parts courage and love for you.

“i also regret not saying anything, anything at all, sooner. i got in my head. i was so scared that saying ‘i’m sorry’ over text wasn’t enough, and i felt it was unfair to talk like normal when things clearly weren’t normal. i needed you to know how sorry i am. then, as the days passed, i realized a phone call wouldn’t be enough either. well, that, and i was so scared you wouldn’t answer my call. i would’ve deserved it, but a rejected phone call somehow felt more painful than a prolonged silence, so i didn’t call. i’m a coward, i know, and i am sorry for that too. that’s why i’m here.” 

jisung paused again, wiping his tears before gently holding your hands in his own, “you can kick me out as soon as i say my last word. i won’t fight you on it. i hate that i hurt you right before getting on the flight. i missed you so much that i lost my mind. i never want to feel that lost again. i never want to lose you. so i’m sorry. i will do everything you need me to, just so i can make things right again. you are my everything, and you deserve more than everything i can give you.”

tears fell from your eyes this time, which made jisung cry even more. the way you looked at him as you took in his apology gave him hope. he raised his hands to wipe your tears and then cradled your face softly. you were enveloped in his love and the relief that, despite the mistakes, he chose to come back to you. he kept his promise to choose you every time. that was more than enough proof that his apology was real.

your hands covered his, and you smiled despite sniffling, “i forgive you, jisung. thank you for apologizing, and thank you for coming here tonight.”

jisung felt as though he could sob and shout from the rooftops in joy. you forgave him. he hadn’t lost you. his heart would be complete again. 

“thank you, y/n. that means more to me than you’ll ever know.”

a comfortable, tender silence washed over you in your living room. you held each other, cherishing the distance disappearing. this was how things were meant to be. this was what you and jisung would always work for, no matter what got in the way, because the shared space between you was the strongest center of gravity you knew.

once all of the tears dried, jisung smiled brightly and confessed, “i really missed you so much. you are my heart, you know?”

familiar butterflies filled your stomach in response to jisung’s sweet, romantic words, “i missed you too, jisung. i’m so happy to have you back. more than you’ll ever know.”

the way jisung smiled at you made you think that maybe, just maybe, he knew exactly how happy you were.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[sweetkpopmusings]

miserable (you & me) | l. minho <3

a/n: oh gosh, don't even get me started on minho. i love this man so much it is truly certifiable. this is probably the fluffiest of the angst, mostly because i'm so soft for minho these days (and every day) <3 pics not mine~

content: angst, happy ending | wc: 1.1k | warnings: none really! | pairing: minho x gn!reader | requests:open

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

감히 내가 조언 하나 할게 후회 땅을 치지 / “let me dare to tell you something, you’ll regret it so bad”

minho gripped his phone tightly in his pocket. he felt as though he was going to burst open, but he held his tongue. you walked next to him, chatting about this person you were interested in. you were actually so interested in them that you considered going exclusive. though he listened intently, minho coudln’t stop thinking that he hated that idea with every fiber of his being. 

he’d met the person in passing and knew from the jump that they weren’t good, let alone good enough for you. minho’s judge of character was revered amongst his closest circle, and maybe that’s why you hadn’t asked him his thoughts on your potential partner sooner. given how much you care about and trust minho, you knew whatever he said would impact your feelings toward your new love interest. after all, minho was always right when it came to you.

the air chilled any exposed skin as dusk turned the corner to night. you turned your head toward minho, aware and wary of his silent, forward-facing gaze. his statuesque face looked abnormally rigid, like he was made of stone. you weren’t sure what was wrong, but you didn’t like the way his current silence made your heart rate rise.

hoping to clear the air, you finally asked, “what do you think of them? is it worth making it official?”

minho turned his head toward you, observing every familiar, precious detail of your face in an attempt to calm his nerves. he felt his hands shaking, and not just from the cold that slipped in under his shirt sleeves. he sighed and wrestled with whether letting the weight of his feelings off his chest would help or hurt you. this time, he really wanted to be selfish. more than that, though, as always, he wanted you to be safe and happy. when you locked eyes with his, however, his resolve collapsed and the words fell out before he could even recognize it was his voice speaking.

“if you do it, you’ll regret committing so much of yourself to them. maybe not right away, but i know you will.”

your jaw dropped. it hurt to hear. a sharp pang hit your chest when minho rejected the only person you had been properly interested in after who knows how long. you were about to admit how it stung and to demand clarification. but minho, seeing the pain twist your features ever so slightly, spoke again.

“they don’t look at you the way you should be looked at. y/n, you deserve so much more than what they could offer you. i know they’re funny, smart, attractive, and…nice enough,” he grimaced, clearly not fully believing his description of them, “but they’re not anywhere near enough for you. i just don’t think they could give you what you need in a relationship.”

“and what do i need, minho?” you asked, a slight edge in your voice, despite your best efforts to remain calm.

minho stopped walking and faced you directly, so you could know that every word he said was full of meaning, “you need someone who tends to your heart. you need someone who wants to help you grow, someone who is willing to grow with you. you need a person who cherishes you and is willing to do anything for you. you need someone who loves you, actively and intentionally.”

the care that poured out of minho left you breathless. the softness and certainty of his eyes melted away all your confusion about his intentions. he wasn’t being a jerk, and he wasn’t saying these things because he didn’t like that person for petty reasons. minho, like countless times before, was protecting you. immense gratitude and fondness washed over you.

you sighed, half frustrated and half relieved, “you say this like you know there’s someone out there who can be the person i need.”

your voice came out as barely a whisper, but minho heard it with perfect clarity. he also knew with perfect clarity that there was only one correct response in this situation.

minho nodded, “i’m right here. i’ll stay here forever, if you’ll have me.”

at first, a light chuckle escaped your lips because the confession was so blunt it felt like a witty joke. as the words and his tone settled into your bones, however, you felt breathless again. almost a dozen words from minho shattered you into thousands of fragments and rebuilt you into an entirely new person. 

well, maybe not entirely new. maybe his words and the feeling of his warm voice breaking through the cold night air made you feel like who you were at your core. the way minho looked at you revealed your barest self, and nothing had ever felt more right. minho, as always, was right.

“there’s no version of my life that doesn’t have you with me,” you confessed, smiling despite the intensity of the conversation and the pounding of your heart.

minho nodded sternly, “well, that settles it then. you’re not going exclusive with them.”

he turned and started walking again, pace full of excitement. you quickly fell into step with him, reaching out to hold his hand. after his muscles tensed briefly in surprise, his hand relaxed, falling into place against yours. you tugged on his sleeve to get his attention again, which he happily obliged. 

“so, minho, do you want to be exclusive with me?”

minho turned his face to the side, not fully, just enough to haphazardly hide the quick upturn of his lips at your question. from this angle, you could see the pink hues coloring the tip of his ear. you smiled too. 

minho avoiding your gaze answered your question clearly, but your heart still fluttered when he replied, “anything for you, y/n.”

you hummed, pleased with this turn of events. minho observed your face, all smiles and sparkling eyes. his heart melted, and he practically giggled at the sight of you being so happy. happy because of him.

your brow furrowed, smile never fading, “what’s so funny?”

he sighed happily, “it’s funny how everything works out in the end.”

“oh really?”

minho nodded and squeezed your hand, softly and securely, “absolutely. no matter what got in the way, we still ended up right where we’re supposed to be. here, side by side.”

you turned your face away from him, failing to hide your blush and lovestruck smile from minho. you couldn’t see it, but minho smiled just as sweetly and brightly as you did. even if his confession hadn’t come out as well as he had hoped, he would never regret daring to say what had been on his mind since the moment he met you.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[sweetkpopmusings]

yeosang coworker headcanons <3

a/n: i am FINALLY starting the coworker!ateez series !!! i had written a note about coworker!yeosang in my phone over a year ago, so it only felt right that i started with this angel <333 pics not mine~

content: fluff, nonidol!au | wc: 0.9k | warnings: none really! | pairing: coworker!yeosang x gn!reader | requests: open

as soon as yeosang starts at the company, you hear constant conversations about him

everything from descriptions of him looking like a greek god to stories of his babygirl nature, you are WELL aware of everyone’s new favorite coworker

despite knowing so much about yeosang, you never see him in the office

you’re starting to think that he’s an urban legend or some shared delusion

because how could he have been working here for months without coming into contact with you ??? 

the office building was certainly not big enough for that to make sense

and so, when your paths finally cross, you think you’re hallucinating

because he is in fact 1) stunning 2) radiating the energy of an angel

like you KNOW it’s yeosang immediately

you consider running away because he feels like the office celebrity and you’re not sure what the protocol is in this situation lmao 

before you can, though, yeosang turns around

he offers you a sweet smile and a somewhat shy hello

heart = melted

it turns out he too is shocked that you haven’t met before, and the conversation becomes you two trying to figure out how you managed to miss each other at every turn

within minutes, you are laughing with yeosang and joking about conspiracy theories

immediately an office friendship is formed

it’s almost as though a curse was broken because now you see yeosang CONSTANTLY and are a witness to all of his habits

for example, he is always carrying packages for the office

he likes showing off how strong he is

people literally tell stories of his rise to being the office superman like somehow employees across the entire company know when he started working out and his current workout routine

and sure he has some….fans….in the office who are a little obsessed with his muscles and his looks because obviously he is the definition of beauty

but mostly it’s in good fun and people are really grateful they don’t have to hurt their backs anymore

once you and yeosang become close, though, he is showing off CONSTANTLY

you literally never have to lift a finger in the office again

yeosang is carrying EVERYTHING for you

he says that he accepts compliments in return or coffee/snacks as payment he wants the compliments more let’s be real lol

but deep down he just really wants to help you because he appreciates you so much :-(

especially since you see him do embarrassing things all the time and you never tell anyone about it

yeosang feels like he owes you for keeping his dreamy coworker reputation intact lmao

like every time he spills coffee, drops his pen, runs into doors, and even says something strange, you are somehow there

it’s a gift of right place, right time

you are probably the only one in the office who knows just how human he is

you giggle to yourself whenever you hear people describe him as “perfect” and “godlike” and “intimidating”

because, of course, you think he’s perfect and stunning still

but you also know that he’s a dork who lives in his own world and lowkey needs to be taken care of because he’s a goofy, precious babygirl

knowing the truth behind reputations goes both ways in your friendship, though

unfortunately, yeosang is also always there when you do something embarrassing 

and boy will he not let you forget about your faux-pas EVER.

he loves to tease you about it 

he finds it so endearing that you too are a little bit of a mess despite your professionalism

sometimes most times he will laugh so hard at something you’ve done that he’ll be in tears before he can even remind you of what happened

and you’re just standing there like -_- because hello ??? yeosang ??? it is 9 a.m. on monday morning you can’t be having a case of the giggles this early

yet he IS having a case of the giggles once again

because you are just so giggle-worthy (yeosang’s words, not mine)

yeosang also secretly loves when you tease him 

it humbles him LMAO and also reminds him of how close you two actually are

in spite of how much he enjoys teasing you, he also hypes you up all. the. time.

being your #1 fan is actually his full-time job

he’ll compliment every piece of work you do, applaud after you give a presentation or make a good comment in a meeting, and even tell coworkers about how talented you are

everyone’s jealous of how much he loves you

yeosang follows you around like a sweet puppy and gets so excited when you pay attention to him

people know you and yeosang are a duo, and they WISH they were you

because who wouldn’t want yeosang by their side during the workday and even at office events ??? 

he’s an absolute JOY to be around

he loves to be silly with you too, and he doesn’t care how much he distracts you because he thinks silliness is a high priority for you every day

he always tells you it’s about “work-life balance”

but you see right through him like you know he just wants to enjoy being friends as opposed to being just coworkers

sweet boy never found work fun until he met you

like he genuinely looks forward to seeing you every day, and he hopes he can be the favorite part of your workday too

on stressful days, he tells you this and reminds you that, while your friendship transcends the confines of the office, he is so grateful to have this job because it brought you into his life

and, just like the moment he said “hello” to you for the first time, your heart is entirely melted

that’s just the yeosang effect <333

please know you melt his heart constantly too :,,-) y’all are a match made in heaven (or, in this case, talent acquisition lol)

[sweetkpopmusings]

dokyeom best friend headcanons <3

a/n: back at it again (finally) with best friend seventeen !!! one day i will finish all of these hcs and the boyfriend ones too.....until that day, please enjoy hundreds of words that represent my love for sweet dokyeom!!! pics not mine~

content: fluff | wc: 0.9k | warnings: none! | pairing: bestfriend!dokyeom x gn!reader | requests:open

dokyeom is sunshine personified which means he is literally the best friend anyone can ask for

like hello ??? a happiness virus by your side at all times ??? an angel being just a quick text or phone call away ??? a dream come true if you ask me 

he is a very sweet, casual best friend

he is so thoughtful, and he’s always checking up on you

but it’s not through grand gestures or cinematic speeches

he will text you during the day to see how you’re doing, remind you to drink water, or even ask about your chores (and if he can come over and “help” aka distract you lol)

dokyeom just cares so much about you :-( like you’re his BESTIE and he refuses to accept you having anything other than a perfect day every day

which means he is the absolute best source of comfort

he will always be a shoulder to cry on or a listening ear

and he comforts you in the ways that you respond to best

want advice? he’ll stay up for hours talking through all the possible solutions with you. want to vent? he will listen intently and validate every single feeling you have. want to forget about the world for a while? he’s taking you out to do your favorite activities or staying in with you and binging your favorite content to escape from the stresses of reality

dokyeom isn’t afraid to ask how he can support you best either like he’s always working to be the best friend he can be

and he is HONORED every time you support him

sweet baby actually cries whenever you’re there for him like he is so so grateful 

he can’t believe he’s lucky enough to have an amazing person like you as his closest friend

usually while you’re comforting him he’ll thank you profusely, cry, laugh at the fact he’s crying over how much he loves you YET again, and smile like everything is fixed

everything IS fixed when you’re by his side actually <333 dokyeom tells you this constantly and he means it.

okay back to him being literal sunshine because im getting emotional lolol

dokyeom laughs at EVERY. SINGLE. JOKE. YOU. MAKE.

like even if it's not that funny, he finds you trying to be funny so hilarious that he's giving you no less than a hearty chuckle for every joke or joke-adjacent thing you say

if you say something particularly funny, he is throwing himself onto the nearest surface (which could very well be you, if you're standing/sitting near each other) and cackling while smacking his hand down repeatedly because he just can't take The Comedy

deadass you're his favorite comedian 

and he LOVES to do bits with you!!!

y'all have a whole repertoire to pull out at any moment that calls for it or whenever you're in the mood

lowkey hoshi gets jealous but it’s fine because you and dokyeom let him in on the bits sometimes 

obviously he is THRILLED any time you laugh at one of his jokes

which is constantly because hello ?? he is a strange and silly boy like you are entertained 25/8

sometimes you two have to ditch your plans entirely because you get so caught up in joking around with each other you lose track of time

these are dokyeom’s favorite hangouts <33 he LOVES being in your own world together :,,,-)

lowkey he gets jealous if you spend a lot of time with any of his members

it’s not super serious, but he definitely pouts

that’s MY y/n !!! they’re MY best friend !!! not YOURS !!!

it’s so endearing because he’s like a little kid who doesn’t want his friend playing with anyone else on the playground

he becomes the most excited puppy when you pay attention to him again though

the members tease him for this behavior but he just reminds them they don’t get it because you’re not their best friend >:-)

talk about a hype man

dokyeom is 1384302094503% dedicated to making you feel confident

he thinks you are incredible inside and out and he will not accept it if you don’t agree

whether he needs to buy you an entirely new wardrobe or script a full presentation on why you are the best person ever, dokyeom is Locked In on the loving y/n agenda 

your reputation absolutely precedes you whenever you meet someone from dokyeom’s life

they know all about you and are immediately obsessed with you because of everything dokyeom has told them

dokyeom will be by your side, smiling brightly, relishing in how much they already love you

he’ll even suggest stories for you to tell when you’re having conversations in a group because he knows how to highlight your best moments

honestly he would totally have a stan account for you and make “y/n funniest moments” compilations and things of that nature

he’s your #1 fangirl and he takes that role VERY seriously

why ?? because one of the proudest achievements in dokyeom’s life is being your best friend :,-) <333333

UGH i love dokyeom so much he is the sweetest boy ever and i need to look at pictures of his beautiful smile and cry because i’m so grateful to be in the world at the same time as him <3333

dokyeom if you’re taking applications for additional friends please let me know i’m eager to take advantage of this exciting opportunity

[sweetkpopmusings]

miserable (you & me) | b. chan <3

a/n: for some reason, i always have the urge to write angst for chan. this scratched that itch, but hopefully it still satisfies you with a happy/hopeful ending :,-) pics not mine~

content: angst, happy ending | wc: 1k | warnings: none really! | pairing: bang chan x gn!reader | requests:open

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

내가 변한 거라면 다시 돌아가 그때로 / “if i’m the one who’s changed, let us go back to the way it was”

it was not as though chan wanted to end up here either. that was apparent to you by the way his eyes were glassy with tears, by the way he breathed through clenched teeth, knuckles white and begging himself to hold it together. he knew that if one tear fell, if one word cracked, it’d all be over. he’d cry until there was nothing left, and, if he wanted to fix this, he needed to be as close to whole as possible. that was nearly impossible, though. being his whole self when he was on the verge of losing you felt like the biggest paradox he could imagine. yet here he was, living it. 

“chan?” your voice was quiet, wanting to bring him back to the conversation but not wanting to scare him away, “we can talk about this later. i know we both have work soon, and i–”

“please,” he whispered, “don’t go yet.”

you nodded, sniffling quietly yourself, hoping he didn’t hear. he did, of course. chan never missed anything when it came to you. except, he learned earlier tonight, that a distance had been forming between you two. 

you knew it wasn’t intentional, but it was starting to hurt. the way he kept forgetting small promises he made, the way he was late to ninety percent of your plans, the way he was only partially present half of the time he was physically with you. it all added up to a dull ache in your chest. that, mixed with the weight of missing him, meant you couldn’t hold it in anymore. that’s how i know it’s not your fault, and i know you’re trying, but i feel like i barely see you now. even when you’re here with me, it’s like you’re a million miles away. i don’t know how much longer i can handle missing you like this. slipped out of your mouth this morning.

his heart broke when that truth entered his reality. chan felt that he had betrayed not only you but also himself. he cared about you more than anything. how could he be so blind to the fact he wasn’t showing up for the person he loved most? how could he not notice that, despite you filling up his mind and heart constantly, he wasn’t proving that to you through his behavior? 

his heart broke even more with how understanding you were. as soon as you said it, you started rattling off the ways his life got in the way, acknowledging that it wasn’t all his fault. how could you be so forgiving of the stress he was under when it was hurting you? how could you be so patient with him when he had been oblivious to this for who knows how long?

chan held your gaze for an eternity, trying to figure out what to say, finally landing on the simplest truth, “y/n, i am so sorry.”

“i know,” you rubbed your hand gently on his shoulder when he cleared his throat, failing to hide the crack in his voice, “i know.”

he sighed and looked at you, risking the tears to take you in fully, to show his apology through his broken expression, “i hate that i’ve hurt you. i hate myself for it. i…i don’t know. it doesn’t even seem fair for me to be hurt in this situation, and i’m not trying to make this about me. i’m just trying to say that you’re so, so important to me.”

chan paused, pulling your hands into his own to reiterate that you were at the center of everything for him. you were his everything.

“i’ve made a huge mistake, and i hate that this mistake left you isolated. you’re the last person i’d want to feel alone. you’re the last person i’d want to lose. you’re the absolute last person i’d want to feel unloved because i love you more than i can grasp. i understand if you have to leave; i understand if you can’t wait around for me to show up in the ways you deserve. i understand…” he paused, willing himself not to fall apart so you didn’t feel the need to comfort him, “do you think we could go back to before i hurt you? i’ll do whatever you need. i swear; i’ll try anything to fix this before it’s too late.”

chan’s tearful gaze held onto you tightly, and you had to put in as much effort as chan to keep yourself from breaking down into a mess of tears and apologies. his unwavering accountability gave you the hope you had lost. the grace and tenderness with which he treated you never ceased to amaze you. he cared for you; there was no doubt about that. his willingness to grow and his acceptance of your decision pushed against the doubts you had of whether he loved you. sitting there, beside him, holding him and his apologies in your arms, you had no doubt that you loved him enough to forgive him again and again.  

“i think we both know that there’s no going back to before. but, chan, i’m not asking to go back, and i’m not leaving. i’m just asking you to come back to me.”

chan sighed with relief, and the tears fell softly and abundantly. the promise of you not leaving was enough to make chan feel as though he could turn the whole world over, just to ensure you knew how grateful he was for you. a small smile formed on his lips, euphoria in the face of your forgiveness. though he couldn’t be too happy, not yet, not when he felt he hadn’t earned it. you could tell, however, by the look in his eyes, he would not rest until he believed your happiness had returned tenfold. only then could he be fully happy himself.

“what do you need? how can i be there for you? please, tell me, so i can make sure i never leave you alone again.”

you smiled, wiping a few tears off chan’s face. already he was proving to you that he’d come back to you every time, no matter what pulled him away. that, you thought, was enough to know you weren’t alone, not when chan was in your life.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[sweetkpopmusings]

miserable (you & me) | s. changbin <3

a/n: i currently have a long weekend thanks to the thanksgiving holiday, so i'm in a bit of a writing frenzy. since i just posted some ateez fluff, i figured i should give into the stray kids angst demon again >:^) please enjoy a moment with changbin <3 pics not mine~

content: angst, happy ending | wc: 1.4k | warnings: none really! | pairing: changbin x gn!reader | requests:open

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

어떻게든 같이 걸어가려, I feel so tired but I can't give you up, my babe / “somehow try to walk with you / i feel so tired but i can’t give you up my babe”

changbin stared at some indiscernible object in the distance–or, rather, the direction opposite you–biding time until he absolutely had to respond to the information you just shared. sure, he was happy for you, but he couldn’t ignore the burning in the back of his throat as he tried to say encouraging words. the inner conflict was eating him alive, yet he felt he had no other choice than to be here and listen, like any good friend would. 

it wasn’t the first time he had been in this position. he ended up here, again and again, because he didn’t know how to get out of it. behind every i’m rooting for you and they’d be crazy not to say “yes” was an i can’t get you out of my head, you know? every time i look at you, i feel my whole self coming undone, only being put back together when you look at me begging to be said. but he couldn’t. changbin wished he could. he practically pleaded with himself each time he saw you to finally say something. changbin pretended it wasn’t his fear of you rejecting him that held him back. he swore that once he had figured out the right words, he would find the right moment, and then, once everything fell into place, he would bare his soul to you. changbin convinced himself he wasn’t a coward by reminding himself that someone as perfect as you deserved the perfect confession. even if it meant he spent years hiding and hurting. 

“changbin? did i lose you there?” the corners of your mouth upturned as you gently and playfully waved your hand in front of his face.

instinctively he smiled back, laughing a little despite the growing pang in his chest, “no, no, i’m right here.”

“good! because i haven’t gotten to the best part of the story yet,” you grinned before continuing to tell changbin all about the cute interaction shared between you and the coworker you were crushing on.

he couldn’t believe the beaming look in your eyes could hurt him so much. jealousy would do that though: make something so beautiful of yours hurt because he wasn’t the one igniting that beauty. that wouldn’t stop him from relishing in it though. your energy, your presence, it was always a gift, even if it broke his heart.

“so that’s when i figured, what the hell? i asked them out right then and there. they got flustered–it was so cute–and then they said ‘yes!’ we’re going out this saturday. can you help me pick out my outfit?”

changbin, who always turned to putty when he saw your puppy-dog eyes, let out a breathy laugh, “yeah, sure, i can help pick out the outfit that will get them to fall in love with you, just so they can break your heart in a few months like everyone else.”

changbin’s face filled with shock and regret before you could finish processing his words. it hurt you, but, judging by the slump in changbin’s shoulders, what he said hurt him even more.

“i’m so sorry for snapping, y/n, i–”

“no, it’s fine. i talk about them too much. i’m sure you’re tired of hearing me ramble on about all my crushes, especially when my dating life is so unlucky,” you forced a smile, aware that changbin saw right through you, as he always did, “i should probably go, so you don’t have to suffer through my rambling any longer.”

the way changbin looked at you kept you frozen in place. you wanted to turn and walk away before tears slipped down your cheeks, or, worse, before either of you said something that would hurt the other. but the way changbin watched you, the way his breath staggered, the way his eyes revealed he had no intention of every looking away from you…it all kept your feet firmly planted on the ground. 

changbin, knees weak and trembling, felt adrenaline coursing through his body. he stood in front of you, hands in his pockets, unsure if this was the moment to finally reach out to you. when he saw you break your gaze away from him to glance toward your route home, he knew, deep down, that it was now or never. he may have already ruined things by snapping. he figured it was better to ruin your friendship by showing you how much you were loved, rather than leaving you hurt with harsh words.

“y/n,” changbin took a deep breath when your eyes once again locked with his, “that was rude, and i hope you know that i never get annoyed by your rambling. i could hear you talk forever, even if it’s about someone you like, as long as that someone makes you happy. i just…it can be hard for me sometimes because…well…i like you. i have liked you for so long, but the timing never feels right, and everyone else seems to have the courage i don’t because you keep ending up with other people. if you’re happy, i’m happy. i guess i just can’t hide it anymore. i like you. i always will.”

changbin paused, eyes brimming with tears, and he mustered up a smile so you didn’t feel forced to comfort him, “i know you like them, your coworker. if your feelings for me aren’t the same, that’s fine. or, i mean, i at least can live with it, as long as you’re still my friend. i can’t give you up. if you need time away from me because of this, i understand. i hope this hasn’t made things too weird. i hope, more than anything, that we can still be friends. a life without you just doesn’t feel like the right life for me.”

you bit your lip, keeping yourself quiet until changbin finished. it was only fair to let him ramble after you had been talking his ear off all night. then, once you were sure he had said everything he meant to, you smiled. changbin, despite himself, let hope bloom in his chest when he saw the smile grow on your face.

“changbin,” you shook your head, laughing quietly in disbelief, “why didn’t you say something sooner? i like you more than everyone else.”

changbin’s eyes got so big you couldn’t do anything other than giggle. a few words from you, and he looked like he was over the moon.

“you…like me?”

“of course, changbin. are you free saturday? i just have to cancel some plans, but then i’m all yours.”i’m all yours turned changbin’s chest into a fireworks show, so, rather than answering you, he broke into a fit of giggles and wrapped you into his arms. he was, always and forever, all yours. he did not need any courage to tell you that, over and over and over again.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[sweetkpopmusings]

heart-fluttering moments with ateez <3

a/n: trying to clear through my very long list of drafts/ideas, and i desperately needed to write some more for ateez. hopefully these give you a nice little boost of serotonin (even if they propel you into your feelings, as they did to me) <3 pics not mine~

content: fluff, can be read as nonidol!ateez | wc: 1.4k | warnings: none really! | pairing: ateez x gn!reader | requests: open

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

seonghwa♡‧₊˚

when he says your name. 

seonghwa, always eager to catch your attention, had plenty of nicknames for you. you loved each and every one of them because, on top of classics like love and darling, he crafted special ones for you and only you. when he really wanted your attention, though, he said your name. whenever he called out to you, you’d be met by his big, sparkling eyes. his voice was always a sweet coo when he said your name, like it was his favorite word in the universe. seonghwa adored the way your whole body responded to him, alight with affection, whenever he called out to you. you never felt more like yourself than with seonghwa, and all it took to make you feel like the only person in the world was him saying my y/n~~ if only you knew that seonghwa folded twice as hard whenever you said his name. one day, maybe soon, he’d tell you his name never sounded perfect until he heard it in your voice.

hongjoong♡‧₊˚

when you tell him about your day.

hongjoong, though subtle about it, was completely and utterly enamored by you. he was not one for grand romantic gestures. he would partake in these on special occasions, particularly if you were fond of them or at least got a good laugh out of it. hongjoong, however, preferred to express his love for you through everyday actions. in particular, hongjoong loved nothing more than asking you how was your day, my love? he could happily sit there for hours, cherishing the way your voice engulfed him. he’d smile brightly, eyes locked on yours, listening intently to every word you said. if you ever felt as though you were talking too much, hongjoong would insist that his favorite part of the day was talking to you. inevitably flustered by his casual confession, he’d tease you playfully, quickly asking you to tell him more and more because he can never get enough of you.

yunho♡‧₊˚

when he tells you stories.

yunho thought about you constantly. while he was too shy to confess this unless you two were feeling extra soft for each other, it was clear to everyone around yunho that you were always on his mind. everyday, yunho would make mental notes of things he wanted to tell you. sometimes, if a day was full of anecdotes he knew you’d love, he’d actually write them down on his phone, a list full of nonsensical reminders of how he saw you in everything. as soon as he could get to you, yunho would reenact every funny moment just to hear you laugh. his heart soared whenever you called him ridiculous after a dramatic retelling of an almost unbelievable story. you thought this was how yunho was with everyone, until, when speaking with other members, you joked about a story no one else had heard before. yunho explained it to them, but not as energetically as he did for you. this was the moment you realized that he was your storyteller. yunho made you feel special in every way, and this special habit of his was no exception. you were, after all, his favorite audience.

yeosang♡‧₊˚

when he remembers.

yeosang is more often than not on his own plane of existence. his mind is one of a kind, and you are frequently entertained by the way he thinks, especially when it takes your conversations and ideas into entirely new territory. despite being a little “airheaded” sometimes, yeosang never forgot a thing when it came to you. he would remind you to restock groceries–somehow he always remembered exactly which items you tended to forget–and he always asked you about upcoming plans he knew you were excited about. one time, when he asked you about an event that you had only mentioned once months prior, you joked that it felt like he was your personal assistant. yeosang, smiling, said i might as well be. i keep a calendar of your life in my head all the time. you laughed because it sounded ridiculous, but the look in his eyes revealed that this was not a joke. when you asked him why, he answered i never want to miss a thing about you. 

san♡‧₊˚

when he tells you how much you mean to him.

san’s heart was undoubtedly the biggest on the planet. his love was generous and open, never letting anyone feel anything but their best. in san’s eyes, however, your heart was the most beautiful thing he’d ever had the pleasure of knowing, and he was honored every day to have a place in it. his terms of endearment for you always reflected how much he adored you: my angel, my star, my world, and so on. san didn’t stop there. on nights he was feeling especially soft for you, san would melt your heart with the sweetest words of adoration. after laughing at your joke, he’d smile widely and say no one makes me laugh like you do. you are so special. before saying goodbye on the phone, san would sigh contentedly, asking you to promise him that you’d never forget how much you mean to him. of course, you promise him, because you would promise him everything. you can hear the joyful look on his face as he says my y/n, you are more precious to me than you’ll ever know. 

mingi♡‧₊˚

when he carries things for you.

mingi was everyone’s princess, including yours. mingi, however, did not think it was fair that only he got the princess treatment in your relationship. he loved when you took care of him, all blushed cheeks and giggles and butterflies in his stomach. what made him feel on top of the world, though, was reciprocating your kindness and care. his heart almost burst out of his chest every time you smiled and said thank you. mingi thought there was no greater honor than being helpful to you. you changed so much of his life and him for the better. he wasn’t quite sure how to express that gratitude and amazement, so he figured the least he could do is carry your groceries, lift heavy objects, or hold every item as you shopped through your favorite stores. any time you asked if he wanted help, even if he was struggling to balance himself, he’d deny it. if you pushed back, saying you could carry things too, he’d look at you with a small pout and shining eyes and ask, shouldn’t i be the one who takes the weight off your shoulders? from that moment on, you let him carry whatever he wanted.

wooyoung♡‧₊˚ 

when he thinks of you first.

wooyoung never, ever shied away from showing his affection toward you. he’d compliment you endlessly, tease you to make you laugh, buy you thoughtful little gifts, and overall make you feel special. you were his beloved, after all. a habit wooyoung developed as you became an even bigger part of his life was thinking of you first, always. it was instinctive and subtle, but it reflected just how deeply wooyoung cared for and cherished you. he would hand you a water before you even realized you were thirsty. he’d bring your coat to you as you stepped out the door because he knew it was cold outside. he’d cover corners and guide you through tight spaces so you never got hurt. when deciding on something, he would ask for your thoughts on it, giving you his undivided attention as you spoke. wooyoung didn’t even notice that he did this, until you thanked him one day for always being so caring. he shrugged, failing to bite back a heartwarming smile, and told you no need to thank me. caring for you is my favorite thing to do. 

jongho♡‧₊˚

when he acts silly.

jongho did not take long to show off his silly side to you. from early on in your relationship, he felt so safe around you. to jongho, it was very clear that you were his person. this mean that he felt like he could truly be himself, so long as you were with him. as he grew more and more comfortable with you, he acted goofier. jongho loved to see you laugh, and his favorite sound was your laughs mixed together. he always fell into a giggling fit whenever you joked around with him too. he adorees how silly you can get because, in his mind, it is even more proof that you two are on the same wavelength. whenever he is laughing with you, jongho feels at home in a world only shared with you. everyone who knows jongho can always tell when he has been with you because he is brighter. you give him energy, even on his most exhausting or difficult days. there is a reason jongho always calls you my happiness. 

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[sweetkpopmusings]

miserable (you & me) | h. hyunjin <3

a/n: i have had these blurbs in my drafts FOREVER. "miserable (you & me)" is a song i've had on repeat since it dropped. i'm also a sucker for angst, so please enjoy these self-indulgent posts (they all have happy endings, i promise!) there will be one for each member, so stay tuned <3 pics not mine~

content: angst, happy ending | wc: 1k | warnings: none really! | pairing: hyunjin x gn!reader | requests:open

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

난 가망이 없는 미래에 손을 뻗어 날 부었네 / “i stretched out my hand towards a hopeless future and poured myself out”

of course it would be raining right now. the day’s weather had been normal, a smattering of clouds above and an overcast glow hinting that the weather might take a turn for the worse, but nothing was set in stone. that turned out to be true in a more literal sense, hyunjin realized, while watching people mill about on the street below with freshly opened umbrellas. he scoffed. what did you think would happen? what did you think would change?

the answer was nothing. but i had no choice.

you and hyunjin met up for your usual weekend get-together, returning to a favorite drink spot of yours after a few weekends of schedules keeping you apart. he had missed you so dearly, something that became achingly clear when his whole body lit up from seeing your face peek through the entrance. you noticed the buzz in his body when he greeted you, a sweet laugh escaping your lips. hyunjin’s heart melted at the sound, collapsing even more into endearment when you said, “i missed you a ton, too.”

a moderate number of people took up the tables and seats in the building, so there was a comfortable hum of casual conversation surrounding you. hyunjin, as always, was so closely tuned into the sound of your voice, he would’ve believed you if you said the place was completely empty. it was clichéd for sure, but he was enraptured by every single thing you said. he loved listening to all your thoughts, stories, jokes, anecdotes; whatever you were willing to share with hyunjin, he’d accept with open and grateful hands. you both laughed as you finished telling him an embarrassing story your friend shared with you the other day, and, so you could take a sip of your drink, you asked hyunjin, “how are you?”

without skipping a beat, hyunjin answered, “i’ve liked you for the longest time.”

seeing as that was quite the unexpected answer to your question, you froze. your brain buffered, face showing barely any expression, except maybe shock or confusion. hyunjin, perhaps realizing what just occurred, reacted with wide eyes and frantic apologies. if his confession hadn’t stopped you so sharply in your tracks, the endless refrain of i’m so sorry! i don’t know why i did that. i’m so stupid! would have drowned out the words he spoke so naturally. you didn’t have time to process, but you tried to protest against hyunjin’s incessant apologies. this, it seemed, was fruitless.

hyunjin, with shaking legs and fumbling hands, gathered his things. 

“hyunjin, what’re you–”

“i should go, y/n,” he responded quickly, too quickly for him to mean it.

your heart broke at the way his voice cracked when he said your name, “no, just stay for a minute. please, i–”

his chest tightened when please fell from your lips, but he couldn’t bear the idea of you begging him to stay, only to tell him you didn’t feel the same. yes, it was immature, and, sure, it was probably selfish. yet all hyunjin could think to do was leave. so he did, his goodbye all staggered breaths and darting eyes.

you turned in your chair, barely catching his gaze as he raced to who knows where, “hyunjin?”

his eyes caught yours, and he ripped them away before he lost his foolish resolve. he hoped he offered you a soft smile, something to say i’m sorry for this. i just want you to be happy, and i guess this is me trying to make sure you stay that way. the adrenaline rush meant he couldn’t feel his face, though. he had no way of knowing what he looked like when he looked back at you. 

hyunjin’s whole trip home consisted of pleas for his legs to move faster. if his steps hit the ground hard enough, he could ignore all the scolding voices inside his head until he was safe in his room. if he were honest with himself, he was outrunning the look of shock on your face, and the way your voice fell when you asked him to stay. hyunjin, as he caught his breath in his room, realized that running away from you meant he ended up in front of his window, facing a future of heartbreak. a sardonic laugh broke free from his lips. maybe if you did it the right way, at the right moment, you’d be looking at them instead. maybe you’d be thinking of something other than angsty plotlines for the strangers passing by on the street below. 

“or maybe i could be hurt much worse,” he whispered to himself. 

that was the last sound that shared space with hyunjin in the room. he sat, mind racing and leg bouncing, completely silent. until someone knocked on the door.

hyunjin shuffled to the entryway, instinctively opening it at a familiar knock, only coming to when he saw you standing before him. of course, no matter how hard he tried, his body would always end up right in front of you.

ignoring the way his deflated figure twisted your chest up in all the worst ways, you chided, “you know it’s rude to confess to someone and leave immediately after, right? you didn’t give me a chance to respond.”

you huffed as you spoke. hyunjin couldn’t help the endeared smile that graced his face when he watched your frustrated, furrowed brow turn into a cute, unintentional pout. 

he thought, they are more precious to me than they’ll ever know, and he admitted, “you’re right. it was very rude of me. while i may not deserve to hear it after the way i acted, would you mind telling me what you were going to say?”

your shoulders relaxed as the familiar shine in hyunjin’s eyes returned. his beautiful smile came back too, as he watched your face light up with a reply he’d only ever dreamed of before.

“i like you too, hyunjin. i have for the longest time.”as though his hands weren’t shaking from anxiety a mere five minutes before this moment, hyunjin reached out to you, pulling you into his home and into his arms. when you accepted his invitation and melted into his embrace, hyunjin thought, i’ll pour my heart out to them again and again, if it means we’ll always end up right here, together.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

[sweetkpopmusings]

Hi 👋😊Can you please do Stray kids 9th female member and her and Lee know are dating and the other members don't know until they suspect them or maybe her and Lee know are going to tell them in a group meeting

hi lovely ! thank you for taking the time to request some writing from me!

i do not write gendered readers, per my rules, and i also do not feel comfortable writing about dating within the group. if you have any other ideas that align with my rules/style, feel free to request it!! i'm always happy to consider new ideas!

i hope you have the loveliest of days and the sweetest dreams of your biases :,-) <3

[sweetkpopmusings]

HI IDK IF U TAKE REQS BUT COULD U DO A HAN BF IMAGINE WITH A FEMALE 9TH SKZ MEMBER OF THEM IN THAT SKZLOG THEY DID IN MILAN FOR STAYWEEK

hi lovely ! thank you for taking the time to request some writing from me!

i won't be able to fulfill this request. i do not write gendered readers, per my rules. i also do not feel comfortable writing about a 9th member or dating within the group overall. if you have any other ideas that align with my rules, feel free to request it!! if i feel that i can write it well, i'll be happy to post it.

i hope you have the loveliest of days and the sweetest dreams of your biases :,-) <3