PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
hello vonnie
Kiana Khansmith
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
YOU ARE THE REASON
Sweet Seals For You, Always
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Game of Thrones Daily
let's talk about Bridgerton tea, my ask is open
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@t0rnado0fs0uls
what's the origin of 'oily josh'?
“Jesus” is derived from “Yehoshuah,” and the English version of Yehoshuah is Joshua.
Christ (as far as I understand it) means anointed. Anointing is a ceremony where you make someone king or priest or something and it involves pouring olive oil on them.
So Jesus Christ = Anointed Joshua = Oily Josh
And it’s a conflict-free way to talk about Jesus without actually saying the word Jesus, which is taboo in many Jewish circles
I JUST CHECKED THIS IS REAL IM SCREAMING
When you’ve spent 92 years on this earth with the name “Dick Van Dyke” and you’re only just now hearing the dumbest possible joke about it.
god i laughed waaaay harder than was necessary
tumblr peaked when we were able to cyberbully john green
this is the post that got me my first anon graphically telling me to kms
that was john green
HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS I’VE GOT 7 DAYS TO FIGURE OUT MONEY. OBVIOUSLY I’M WORKING WITH INSURANCE AND THE BANK TO BUMP THAT NUMBER DOWN BUT FOR NOW i’M PUTTING UP A GOFUNDME
https://www.gofundme.com/44dk6u-help-me-pay-for-top-surgery&rcid=r01-154394855837-1e28212ab0844ef2&pc=ot_co_campmgmt_w
Any amount, even just a few dollars, would be a big help from you guys!
Why not both?
Theory: JK Rowling is actually Barty Crouch Jr taking polyjuice potion. The real JK Rowling is locked in a suitcase in Scotland. I pray daily for her release.
My conspiracy is she pulled a Gilderoy Lockhart and the Harry Potter series isn’t hers and now she’s writing bad fan fiction to pretend like she actually wrote it.
This is also good.
This is never not funny
rebloggin’ cause that is the actual look on my face when that happens
trying out passwords
What the fuck
I cannot believe….
y'all are messing with the nature of things!!!
Donald Duck with a normal voice will always feel unnatural and wrong.
Since once in a blue moon I actually discover a decent rule for adulting, and since I know I have followers a few years younger than me who are just entering the workforce, I want to tell you about a very important phrase.
“I won’t be available.”
Imagine you’re at work and your boss asks you to come in on Saturday. Saturday is usually your day off–coming in Saturdays is not an obligation to keep your job. Maybe you were going to watch a movie with a friend, or maybe you were just going to lie in bed and eat ice cream for eight hours, but either way you really, really don’t want to give up your day off.
If you consider yourself a millennial you’ve probably been raised to believe you need to justify not being constantly at work. And if you’re a gen-Z kid you’re likely getting the same toxic messages that we did. So in a situation like that, you might be inclined to do one of three things:
Tell your boss you’d rather not give up your day off. Cave when they pressure you to come in anyway, since you’re not doing anything important.
Tell your boss you’d rather not give up your day off. Over-apologize and worry that you looked bad/unprofessional.
Lie and say you’ve got a doctor’s appointment or some other activity that feels like an adequate justification for not working.
The fact is, it doesn’t matter to your boss whether you’re having open heart surgery or watching anime in your underwear on Saturday. The only thing that affects them is the fact that you won’t be at work. So telling them why you won’t be at work only gives them reason to try and pressure you to come in anyway.
If you say “I won’t be available,” giving no further information, you’d be surprised how often that’s enough. Be polite and sympathetic in your tone, maybe even say “sorry, but I won’t be available.” But don’t make an excuse. If your boss is a professional individual, they’ll accept that as a ‘no’ and try to find someone else.
But bosses aren’t always professional. Sometimes they’re whiny little tyrants. So, what if they pressure you further? The answer is–politely and sympathetically give them no further information.
“Are you sure you’re not available?” “Sorry, but yes.”
“Why won’t you be available?” “I have a prior commitment.” (Which you do, even if it’s only to yourself.)
“What’s your prior commitment?” “Sorry, but that’s kind of personal.”
“Can you reschedule it?” “I’m afraid not. Maybe someone else can come in?”
If you don’t give them anything to work with, they can’t pressure you into going beyond your obligations as an employee. And when they realize that, they’ll also realize they have to find someone else to come in and move on.
IMPORTANT!! PLEASE READ!!
Just like with many other parts of life, learn to say ‘no’ to people. You are important. Don’t kill yourself for another person, esp. if they are your boss.
Just a heads up right now: on the day when Trump dies, I’m going to be extremely tasteless about it. It’s going to get ugly. You are going to see a side of me I am not proud of. I don’t want any call-outs in my inbox, I’m stating right now that lines will be crossed.
How disgusting can someone be
I wouldn’t even say this about my worst enemy
Forget the fact that its trump. If you agree with this youre fucking evil. Evil literally lives inside you. Wow.
Anyways all of y’all AND the evil that literally lives inside of you are invited to the sick ass house party I’m throwing when lord dampnut kicks the bucket
I feel like all you Americans need to take a look at what happened here in the UK after Maggie Thatcher died. Because when it comes to tasteless celebrations fuelled by anger and the death of a hated political leader, we REALLY pushed the boat out. We had street parties. We had burning effigies. We pushed “Ding Dong the Witch is Dead” to the top of the charts out of sheer hatred. Bone up kiddos, and I really hope you manage to do that truly American thing, of dramatically outdoing us with your celebrations.
Reblogging for last comment.
They’re making Hannibal evil… I shoulda seen this coming but still…
I was hoping he’d be an anti-hero at least. :(
HE EATS PEOPLE
Broke: Judeo-Christian
Woke: Judeo-Islamic
every time i see this post i think abt the time when i listened to a bunch of muslim and jewish students spent their entire 10 minute break arguing abt whether god actually cares you eat gummy bears (made with gelatin derived from pork) or not, standing by the vending machine and eating gummy bears the whole time
Instagram: animals_lover_ig
Please credit the actual photographer Tanja Brandt who took these beautiful photos of Ingo (the dog) and Poldi (the owl)!
greekgodsarestrange
replied to your post
“movies that have some asshole or monster claim to be a god and so some…”
I can’t help but feel that the Jewish people should not be proud of israel meaning “he who fights with G-d.” It’d be like Christians being called “those guys that really hate Jesus”
Your big mistake was taking xtianity and trying to apply it to Jews, Judaism, and our relationship with G-d.
You can not on a fundamental level apply xtianity to Judaism because they are nothing alike and highly incompatible.
To understand this concept of fighting G-d you have to solely look at Judaism otherwise it won’t make any sense.
See xtianity sees fighting with god and takes that to mean one hates god.
Jews see fighting with G-d and we go ah that person loves G-d.
Fighting with G-d to Jews is an expression of love. It is a massive aspect of relationship with G-d.
There is a reason that there are many atheist Jews and those Jews are some of the most like hardcore Jews ever.
There is a famous story of two Rabbis arguing about something in the Torah and finally after much back and forth The Voice of G-d speaks to them and says Rabbi A is correct.
So Rabbi B says to The Voice of G-d that might be, but You gave us the Torah for us here on Earth to understand and interpret so what you say is correct has no bearing on this argument.
G-d starts to laugh and says “Look at how wonderful my children are”
To Jews, G-d is not necessarily necessary to the equation.
So to fight G-d is rather an expression of love rather then hate.
Fighting G-d whether you be like Yakkov who physically fought G-d or if be a battle of words like pretty much every Jew ever is a basic core of Jewish culture.
No matter where in the world we are, no matter how far we are from each other, no matter what the one thing you can always count on is that fighting G-d will always be apart of Jewish culture, Judaism, and the very nature of every Jewish person.
Why is one the most important words in Judaism. Why allows us to explore the world, ourselves, and each other. Why helps to debate and to understand. Why lets us argue with G-d and Why helps to become closer to G-d.
One of the fundamentals of Judaism is to ask questions and question everything.
Question your leader, question yourself, and question G-d.
When we question and fight G-d we don’t come away hating G-d or rejecting Judaism. Rather we come away with a deeper understanding of everything and with a further love of G-d.
To G-d there is nothing as wonderful as when a Jew comes and fights with G-d.
And to a Jew it is one of the most fundamentally Jewish things they can ever do.
So this is why I ended up wanting to convert. You question and argue and are encouraged to think and speak up. We fight with G-d to gain understanding.
And because G-d is a good teacher, who wants us to grow and learn for ourselves, G-d loves it when we end up going wildly off-topic in a debate about the parasha. G-d wants us to question and try and make sense of the world.
Seriously, I saw an argument on Tumblr about whether or not vampires could keep kosher. I told my rabbi about it and he was DELIGHTED. “What conclusion did they come to?” was his immediate question. Not “that’s silly” or “that’s irrelevant” or “vampires don’t exist” or “that’s blasphemy.” No, given the existence of vampires as a preemptive condition for the argument, he wanted to know how these other Jews came to their conclusions, what sages they referenced in making their arguments, and how their conclusions might apply to other halachic rulings.
Why? Because it meant we were THINKING about Torah and the Talmudic teachings, and learning them in a way that was relevant to us. In other words ARGUING A MOOT POINT MEANT WE KNEW OUR STUFF.
Compare to Xtianity, where you learn what the pastor read that week and you’re not to question his interpretation of it.
@greekgodsarestrange Like, no offence, but this is just such a goyische reading of Jewish culture. Arguing is one of the major cornerstones of our culture. If you don’t have heated debates with your loved ones or at least tell them their opinions are wrong and here’s why on a regular basis, it’s like…how do you even have a relationship with that person? Fuck yeah, we wrestle with G-d! G-d came over for dinner and gave us a special book and we were like “G-d, you know you’re the best, we are so grateful, but also here’s a 72-volume treatise on everything we don’t like about that book you got us, because honestly, WTF, seriously we need to talk about some of this. So anyway, when you come back for Shabbos dinner next week, please bring your notes because THERE WILL BE A DISCUSSION. Also some of us don’t think you exist, so jot that down.”
#self care is drinking four glasses of manichewitz and fighting hashem in the parking lot behind the synagogue (tags via @quicksilverware)
My Rabbi just gave me this resource: it’s the whole Talmud online!
https://www.sefaria.org/texts Check he out!
What’s really great is you can highlight verses and find all cross references (it also has a gazillion other texts - Maimonides’ writings, Torah, Tanakh, Rashi’s commentaries, the Zohar, Shulchan Arukh, etc etc etc) *and* if you have an account, you can create study sheets to provide citations for a certain topic (and you can see other people’s pages too!). You can even search to make sure you’re only seeing things with English translations, or tell them you don’t mind pure hebrew/aramaic.
You can even tag source sheets by topics covered by the sheet: https://www.sefaria.org/sheets so like you could tag it “Art” or “Kavanah” or “LGBT” or “Purity” or whatever else - want 22 “sheets” that are related to Elul? Well it’s there. They also have a neat page now about “visualizations” of Torah and Talmud https://www.sefaria.org/visualizations in case you like big data. And from there, the Responsa Anthology is pretty cool.
It’s!!!! an amazing website!!!!
it really is the best site.
also you reminded me I need to do my Torah study and drashing Thursday.
