Summary of Liam’s episode on Killing It podcast
Note: some of these issues might be triggering so please proceed with caution especially when you listen to the full episode.
Talked about Live Forever music video concept;
Why he wanted to discuss mental health and he mentioned that he went through different therapies trying to find the “key to his happiness”;
Being your own hero is an interesting concept to Liam. Mentioned Matthew Mcconaughey speech on an award show and how his hero was himself after 10 years;
Talked about his journey since he was 14 years old on the X-Factor;
Fun fact: Karen was his chaperone in 2008 at the show;
He did gigs by himself and he shares his bullying experience during those years;
Liam explained why he did go back to the show as “a way to get out of that town” and make his parents proud. Liam liked music at the time and he didn’t think he was that good;
Liam shared that he didn’t have many friends and it was difficult to deal with the 1D boys, with egos and adjusting to each other. Liam felt that at 16 years old, X-Factor that year was his last chance to make it;
The boys knew who he was already from his experience in 2008 and it felt like a “weird atmosphere”;
1D was crazy! Rehearsals, interviews together and separately;
Story: they had to go to a movie premiere and they didn’t want to do it. They wanted them to do interviews and in the end they had to go to the red carpet of the movie premiere;
At first they found it was really “funny” to have all that success. Liam thinks it’s beautiful and lovely, but he can’t understand it sometimes. They slowly spiraled and he thinks they were too tired and that’s why it was over. They were working relentlessly;
The adrenaline highs were too many and the crashes were hard;
There wasn’t any support from mental health specialists. Liam considers their team was good, but he believes that nobody can experiences the same thing in terms of mental health;
He felt very lonely and he developed agoraphobia. He could do anything, but he didn’t know what to do and he had nobody to do it with;
His brain was good when he was active, but then it would get “really dark really soon”. That’s when alcohol started to be used as a copying mechanism. Liam mentioned it wasn’t healthy;
It was difficult when he didn’t had anywhere to turn to and there was “no stop button”, especially with fame. It’s an ongoing thing;
He felt like the more success they got, the crazier he personally got;
STD happened and he felt weird because he didn’t know what to do with it;
Mentioned that 1D never celebrated their awards after so they started celebrating during. Mentioned the story at the BMAs when they cut him off and he couldn’t finish his speech. Awards became normal. Said that he usually was the one doing the thank you speeches and he felt a lot of pressure;
Considers that 1D were the “boss”. They were too young and listened to the adults that were around. They couldn’t understand it all and didn’t know how to do it;
Liam felt tired being in the band towards the end. He was drunk 90% of the time while he was there. It fel tiring to do the same songs every single night in different places, even though he always thought that this was important for fans as it was “their first time”;
Mentions that he hated singing WMYB by the end of it and he felt like at 22 years old it didn’t make sense to him personally. His idea of love and relationships changed;
He felt relieved during the last two weeks of 1D. Knowing that he didn’t have a schedule. Felt that it was weird after they went on break, like he was retiring. Shared the same story about his dad through his retirement and how he helped him dealing with it by sharing the experience;
Started working again and it was different to get a different team and label. He has the control, but he doesn’t know what to do with it;
What helped him during his mental health lows: speaking with someone, little role models around, learning to not be afraid to talk to people;
He worked with a psychiatrist and started questioning his decision making process and learnt to trust his own feelings;
A lot of voices questioning everything, but it’s important to know how your brain works. Helped him a lot;
Tried to figure out who he was;
It was important to him going to the gym and defining a goal. It made a lot of difference to him. The physical part helped him with the mental part;
Mentions that he might have gone a little overboard with the training because of the HUGO modeling;
The main goal to Liam is happiness;
Mentions that he usually thinks if he is in the right place in life and if he isn’t he “will get the hell out” to try and control his life;
Advice for a little kid wanting to be in the music industry: be careful to not be too obsessed with it and trying not to paying too much attention;
Dealing with criticism: he tries to tell that he won’t read it, but he will do it anyway. He sometimes go through trolls pages to see how their lives are. You wouldn’t take advice from trolls, but Liam would take criticism from somebody close to him;
Down days: tries not to do too many quick fixes (going out and partying). Good sleep, nice movie and pizza. Accept that you have bad days, deal with it and sleep on it. Tomorrow is a fresh day.
Liam feels that he hide so much of his life that he feels like it’s more effort;
Liam mentions that when he was in 1D he was “Mr. Boring/Vanilla” which was funny to him now because his life became a “media circus”. He feels like he is more carefree now and more confident as a solo artist;
Liam talks about how he writes on his notes what he wants to say to trolls, in extensive detail and then just leaves it;
When the criticism is about him he doesn’t care much, but when it’s about someone he cares about he gets “bitty”;
Feels like people pick up on different little things he says and looks over his should afraid that a little thing he said might become a big media story and has to deal with it;
Liam shared that he was driving around and listened to a Drake song and related to it;
He feels that it’s important to feel gratitude towards his life. Mentions the “Where We Are Tour” and how Louis used to say “Look around lads, look at where we are”;
Liam doesn’t meditate too much, he uses the gym as his “meditating” mechanism;
When he had a bad day after an interview he just walked home for like an hour;
Mentions the cast for West Side Story and making the audition for Steven Spielberg;
Feather tattoo similar to Jordan. Story about his grandmother and him and his mother finding the feather because he always thought it was his granny.
