Something I wish I knew when I needed it:
When someone is trying to pressure you into something that violates your boundaries
The response to “If you loved me you would do it.”
Is “If you loved me you wouldn’t ask me to.”
Now, if you actually DO love each other and want to continue a relationship, that should be the beginning of a conversation, not the end.
Not everything a person wants is their partner’s responsibility to give them.
So… They have needs that they feel aren’t being met. The way they want you to fill that need is objectionable to you. Is what they want really what they need? Is there a way to change the situation that would make you comfortable with what they want?
To dig deeper, what is the core of that need and what other ways could that need be filled, that you can both be happy with?