#actuallytramatized

[apathyakaza]

I hate it when my parents say “i know you better than you know yourself!” Like hon you only know personality #5 and #7 but good to know that my acting is convincing ig

[system-rights]

When someone with trauma apologies, let them apologise, assure them, thank them. Don’t just reject it and tell them “you dont have anything to apologise for”. Due to trauma, they think they do, accept it, assure them in a way of “thank you but everything is okay”. 

I know personally being told I shouldn’t apologise makes me feel worse as I don’t know what I can do to ‘fix’ things. Outright telling them theres nothing to apologise for can accidentally come off as rejecting the scenario that they feel an apology is needed for.

[cauldronsystem]

A lot of people have an issue with "making your illness your whole personality" and here's my take on it. It's a good thing to accept that long term, treatment resistent, or otherwise impactful illness can and will change the way you view the world and interact with it and that's totally fine. What's not fine is acrediting your mental illness with your positive personality traits. You are not a deeper thinker because you're depressed, you were before and you will be after. that's not depression- that's you! You're not more intelligent because you have anxiety. You were always intellegent! You always will be! You are not more fun and spontaneous because you're bipolar- you've always been fun! You're wonderful. You're not tough and withstanding because you were traumatized. You were tough to begin with, and you wouldn't be weaker or more empathetic or soft without your trauma. they didn't make you anything. Your mental illness effects you, your perceptions, and is a part of you that doesn't deserve to be shunned. But it is not all of you, and there will still be a you there when you start to heal.

[princerain114]

[apathyakaza]

I love recovering from abuse and slowly understanding why I do certain things, 98% of the time it’s a defense mechanism lol

Like the reason why I’m more prone to consider lying to people when they ask me a question about something I’ve done, they’ve done or generally about the surroundings is because my parents often couldn’t handle the truth, when my opinion wasn’t sugarcoated or aligned with theirs they often guilt-tripped, gaslit, and ignored me for making them uncomfortable with my emotions! And not because I’m an inherently bad and mischievous person

[heavens-guilt]

i desperately need someone to understand how fucked up i feel.

i feel broken beyond repair

[actually-abused]

no, you don't deserve to die.

you deserve to be used

again and again and again

until you dont know who to trust

and you're shattered like glass

just like me.

[cauldronsystem]

Hey, if you have triggers that seem tiny or stupid or weird, you are not being unreasonable by asking people to respect them. People can and will respect them. We have a trigger related to puppies. Not just puppies, but extremely specific circumstances with puppies. And we were able to tell our roommates and they didn't ask intrusive questions or tell us it was stupid. They only asked how they could help us. Those who are intrustive or disrespectful are assholes, and while they are the norm in some cases, they aren't everyone. People can respect your triggers, you deserve to have them respected, and you will find people who respect you and your trauma history.