#adhd me

[adhdbri]

[alphie-in-the-sky]

[arriathedragon-2]

No one:

My ADHD brain when I'm bored: mmm yes finger looks tasty let's just-

N O M

[queerlydivine]

I can't listen to podcasts because I have APD and can't see the words.

I can't read books because I have ADHD and there are too many words on a page.

I can't watch youtube because the subtitles/captions are auto gen and very wrong a lot of times.

Basically I an thirsting for knowledge in a desert.

[stoertebaker]

Ok, little PSA/CW ahead, I‘ll try and document a bit about my life with that still relatively fresh ADHD diagnosis from now on so I can see what/if something changes (but not every day, no worries). If you are annoyed/triggered/don‘t wanna read it, just block the tag #adhd me or #personal.

This blog is just the most convenient space for writing down (no way I make an extra blog or take the time to sit down and write stuff on actual paper).

#1: 2nd therapy session, 1st day meds

So yesterday was my second appointment with my therapist and despite one major revelation on how my brain works that I‘ll try tie more into my everyday routine (aka break tasks into infinitesimal smaller tasks, write plans and give rewards after everything bc it‘s ‚like a dog who only does tricks when it‘s rewarded immediately‘) I also got meds, yay!

Obviously there are only two brands for adults available here and one of them (Ritalin) falls short on supplies. So that left me with only one option (Medikinet). I start with the lowest dosage, 10mg per day. I‘m allowed to double up in a week.

My therapist also told me to not expect wonders (I really don‘t, but it can only get better from here, so there are probably hopes) and that it takes time to adjust and find the dosage optimal for every individual person. Some people take a much higher dosage everyday. She also told be to be careful bc, for some patients, one side effect can be, that traumatic memories are brought back present. I don‘t want those again, thank you, so let’s hope for the best :)

Today is day 1. I realized how I already procrastinated on taking the pill, despite me actually wanting to take it (it’s also a pretty color, very pastel aesthetic). Anyway, after a while of stalling I even ate proper breakfast with fruit and stuff and took it. Now it‘s almost evening.

If there already are effects, they are subtle. My head felt a little different over the day. A bit clearer maybe, like more tidied up? Until maybe half an hour ago I also stopped fidgeting so much. But. All of this doesn‘t feel like a major difference. In fact, it could just be me, having a good day and/or the expectations I probably have anyway.

I‘m still not sitting at my desk 6 hours straight, doing the stuff I‘m supposed to do, but I suspected for quite some time now, that I should also build a new routine on writing (like setting clocks, taking scheduled pauses and switch off every mobile device like, for real). It‘s hard to even make a schedule, if I‘m fully honest. Mine are always sloppy and leave to many loopholes for my sneaky bastard self. So if anyone has tips on that, I‘m up for it! :D

Insights so far: while I‘m not necessarily more productive today, my thoughts are clearer. A bit.

Conclusion: optimize workspace. Make/optimize detailed schedules.

[wolfsnape]

Someone: *gives me more than 2 indications at the same time*

ADHD me:

[queerlydivine]

Gets up to fix something to eat.

Use the bathroom first. Toilet needs to be cleaned. Pick up trash. Lie down.

Gets up to fix something to eat.

Refill altar glasses. Light candle and smoke for ancestors. Clean up dresser top. Lie down.

Gets up to fix something to eat.

Takes dog outside. Check mail. Get kids back on task in class. Lie down. Make this post.

Gets up to fix something to eat.

[hatewins]

i hate adhd