"For years Black parents believed that getting our children into better schools and neighborhoods was the surest path to opportunity. But now many of us are wondering: what does it cost to be the only Black child in the room?
Look, our kids being in predominantly white spaces can open doors. There’s no question about that. But we must understand that there is an underside to those opportunities. The question many parents should be asking isn’t just what our children gain from these spaces, but also what they might lose if we aren’t intentional about keeping them grounded in their own culture.
Let’s face facts. When we talk about raising Black kids in predominantly white spaces, we usually focus on academics and future opportunities. What we also need to discuss is what constantly being “the only one” does to a child’s sense of identity.
Research shows us that Black children as young as 10 are viewed as older and less innocent than white children. (10! They are only babies.) That means many of our kids learn early that they have to think about how they’re perceived in ways their classmates who need sunblock 3000 to go outside in the summer never do. They become experts at managing how the present themselves to others before they are even old enough to understand why.
But there is another, greater danger. And it’s something much quieter that you might not know is happening before it’s too late."
Article HERE
Because I've been asked about it, Imma share this article that came across my dash. 👍🏾
'trans men are all seen as "confused little girls" without exception' preachers when a Black trans man exists. even Black cis girls are often not seen as little girls. have we heard of this.
Emotionally parentified/adultified kids learn that it is their job to grow up fast and swallow their own emotional and developmental needs to keep the peace at home and manage their parents. These kids may get “so mature for their age” or “so low maintenance.” While meant as a compliment, these phrases simply describe children who were asked to bypass their own developmentally appropriate role of child to become a little grown-up. And those roles take a toll.
( James Norton for DECIDER / Will I ever be good enough?, Karyl McBride / The Crane Husband, Kelly Barnhill / Dissonance, Megan Farison )
considering that siffrin canonically got separated from his island as a teenager & is in fact a canon victim of adultification, i think people should explore kidfrin thriving on anger to survive, i think people should touch on this point, i think people who already explore such dark themes in isat whitout shying away would have no problems with this approach, i think more angry kidfrin content should be out there
Act 5 Spoilers Below!!!
So What If Siffrin's Hugest Mental breakdown in act 5 wasn't just the loops trauma but behavioral regression? huhh??? have people considered this option?????
They run into the house by themselves when thinking the party's gonna leave them behind, behavioral regression at its fucking peak
ik due to the adultifcation of black girls, erica sinclair was perceived by the show runners as “too tough” to have people worry about her. however, the one of the few things about her character i think that was done well was the wardrobe department choosing bright colours for her colour theme. the pinks and purples looked amazing imo.
The question, by a nurse after a 13-year-old was raped, is a symptom of a larger societal rot.
The devastating impacts on reproductive rights and individual lives after the fall of Roe continue apace.
One study showed that as early as five years old, society perceives Black girls as “less innocent” and “more adult-like” than their non-Black counterparts, placing an unfair expectation on them to act more maturely.
The latest high-profile account to detail the gut-wrenching effects arrived in Time this week. The story—”She Wasn’t Able to Get an Abortion. Now She’s a Mom. Soon She’ll Start 7th Grade”—centers on Ashley, a 13-year-old girl from Mississippi who in the fall of 2022, according to her mother, was raped by a stranger in her yard.
The assault resulted in a pregnancy that she was unable to terminate because of the strict abortion bans in Mississippi and its bordering states, each enacted after the overturning of Roe. Ashley’s mother, Regina, told Time that she didn’t have the resources to take her daughter to the nearest clinic hundreds of miles away in Chicago.
This story, recounting Ashley’s trauma and highlighting the many systems that failed her, is an incredibly difficult read. But one line has especially stayed with me:
“One nurse came in and asked Ashley, “What have you been doing?” Regina recalls. That’s when they found out Ashley was pregnant.”
This is the question a nurse chose to ask when confronted with a Black child in clear distress, who had shown up to the emergency room unable to stop vomiting. Not “What happened to you?” or “Are you okay?”
The nurse reportedly asked a 13-year-old child, “What have you been doing?” It’s hard not to see the suspicion and implicit blame in the question. That culpability, deployed with equal amounts of derision and judgment, is something that I and many other Black women and girls are all too familiar with.
Victim blaming reaches people of all races. But Black girls stand at a uniquely horrifying intersection where both gender and skin color are weaponized against them.
One study showed that as early as five years old, society perceives Black girls as “less innocent” and “more adult-like” than their non-Black counterparts, placing an unfair expectation on them to act more maturely.
In 2017, Georgetown Law’s Center on Poverty and Inequality reported that participants in a study perceived Black girls as needing less nurturing, protection, and comfort than white girls. These virulent misconceptions, of course, can be traced back to historically racist stereotypes about Black femininity. GLCPI wrote:
“These images and historical stereotypes of Black women have real-life consequences for Black girls today. According to [Jamila] Blake and colleagues, “these stereotypes underlie the implicit bias that shapes many [adult’s] view of Black females [as] … sexually promiscuous, hedonistic, and in need of socialization.”
The results of this adultification are pervasive. Black girls are often punished more severely in schools and the criminal justice system than their white peers. The ripple effects can be found all over popular culture.
Huff Post’s Taryn Finley attributed this societal perception as a key reason why R. Kelly, whose accusers were primarily Black women and girls, was able to remain successful despite allegations of child sexual abuse surrounding him for several decades. And they can be found in questions like, “What have you been doing?”
Girlhood is a delicate period. It should be a time for crushes and school dances, not confronting the dark realities of misogyny and racism. It’s time for society to allow young Black girls to be girls, instead of forcing them into becoming women. Not ask, like the nurse in this story, “What have you been doing?”
