Aghora - At the Left Hand of God
"Every morning when I wake up I do three things.
First, I remember that I'm going to die. This gives urgency to the way I will live that day.
Second, I spend five minutes in thanksgiving to Nature for being permitted to live, to have this chance to experience, to learn, and to achieve.
And third, I resolve not to cheat my consciousness during the day. As long as I don't cheat my consciousness nothing I do during the day can stain me, [...]
And there is a practice which I follow every night before going to sleep. It is very simple, but it has helped me immensely and it can help anyone who uses it. It involves only three questions:
Have I lived? Have I loved? Have I laughed?
Have I lived? - Have I made the best use of the time provided me during that day to grow, to learn, to develop?
Have I loved? - Have I reached out to everyone I met and made them aware of the love in my heart and eased their burdens of self-mistrust and self-doubt?
Have I laughed? - Have I seen the humorous side of even the most painful incident?
If the answer to any one of these questions is no, then it is a matter for remorse. One more day has passed and I am another day closer to my death, and I have not exerted myself to my fullest potential. This is enough to make me work harder the next day and try to make amends, before Mahakala comes and catches me unawares. It is this intense desperation to live life to the fullest which is the hallmark, the stamp, of a true Aghori."
- Robert E. Svoboda: Aghora. At the Left Hand of God.
Krishna Das recommended to his listeners who wanted to read the most relevant book about Karma to only read Aghora III. He specifically said to NOT read the first two books because "they will mess with your head and give you nightmares.
Well, that was motivation enough for me to get started with the first one. And I didn't regret it.
My interest in Tantra (more specifically, vedic tantra and left-hand tantrism) had increased recently (especially since my vedic astrologer read in my chart that I must have dabbled in tantra and kundalini practice in past lives and seem to have 'unfinished business' there) and together with me leaving the self-righteous brotherhood of the "Golden Dawn" and its right-wing acolytes behind during the dawn of the covid19 crisis, I started to open my eyes to the forbidden paths - that is, forbidden for those who self-identify as "white magicians" and condemn the likes of Aleister Crowley to the deepest pits of hellfire.
Going back to Asian traditions was warranted - monotheistically indoctrinated Westerners are too "black and white".
A Brahmin would never condemn an ascetic, half-naked Sadhu - he would recognise the same seeker, the same Atman in him and bow before a brother of a different path.
Blaming and finger-pointing is the way of the west, it is not conductive to spiritual advancement.
But I disgress. Robert Svoboda was the personal disciple of an Aghori - a particularly wild specimen of a tantric holy man. Aghoris worship the female divine, often in its ferocious forms. "Ma", the great mother, may come in the form of Bhairavi, Kali or Durga - the names and the particular forms are secondary. Behind them all is the play of the divine male (Shiva) and female (Shakti) in all its forms.
Aghoris are extreme Sadhus - they go to great length, often practicing for years in the smashan, the cremation fields, living among corpses and human bones, searching for that inner light beyond the forms of our physical existance.
The book is a collection of stories of Svoboda's master, losely grouped around different themes, and it gives a fascinating glimpse into that world that is hidden also to most Indians.