#ahaahahahah

[jadeydoodlebug]

RAHHHHHHHHHH I AM AN UNSTOPPABLE FORCE!!!! 💪💪💪💪🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️❗️⚠️⚠️⚠️🦅🦅🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸 I CANNOT BE CONTAINED!!!!!!

(I managed to tell a family member “I don’t like being touched” at the family function)

[helenapsent]

Okay, after reviewing "The Mandela Catalogue" again, I realized that my theory with Gabriel turning Jesus into an alternate has a point.

I am also in awe of the fact that. Gabriel is Lucifer. Like, I had this clear fucking story up until the last episode that Gabriel is Lucifer's helper, they're "messing around," going ahead of God, everything's okay, and then I watch the last episode and I'm like, "Lol, the Archangel Gabriel is actually Lucifer, but he still has his face on."

And I'm just like, "Oh, shit, are you serious?? Although... basically nothing's changed except for the point that Gabriel has become an imbo specifically."

So... in connection with this I can just briefly voice my thought:

God and his angels were living in heaven, hanging out, and then the Archangel Gabriel started noticing that God was acting weird. Does everyone know the phrase: "God works in mysterious ways"? Well, that's exactly what it is.

And so for all the time Gabriel was watching what God was doing with the weather and the execution of people (we all remember the 10 executions of Egypt), and to put it mildly, he did not like it very much, saying that God is supposed to be so righteous, instill authority in all living things, in general he's kind of a big heavenly boss, but only the ways of it all are kind of weird, or rather, he'll rage if he doesn't like something, and kind of vent his anger on people and the environment well. ...unethical or something?

So, Gabriel and God had a pretty good quarrel on this subject, in connection with which God took offense at him, so he shanked the Archangel with a thunderbolt and he poured a stone down (his wings fried, it hurt).

Once on the ground, Gabriel somehow came to his senses. And he held such a grudge against God that he wanted to take revenge - to exterminate all his creations, people in particular, so that he would correct his actions and, if possible, bring him back to heaven. While the Fallen Angel was contemplating his plan, he wandered into the depths of Hell.

Satan took him in, gave him his own place in the ninth circle, and made him look more or less presentable. Gabriel changed his name to Lucifer, and made a nice home in the Abyss of Hell.

After a while he decides to tell Satan about his revenge on God, and at the same time suggests that he thus glorify his power. The Lord of Darkness is very happy with this arrangement, and so he gives him the go-ahead.

And so it began: Gabriel began to conjure up similar creatures, called alternatives. He shoved all of them down to the ground and watched as one by one they died, suffering from headaches and depression, and then killed themselves, and his "offspring" received a human shell as a reward for their work.

God saw all this, freaked out, and decided to warn Noah about the coming flood, which should wash away all these demons and monsters that crawled to the surface from under the core of the earth. "Save yourself and your family, and take the animals with you-they are my most precious possessions," God uttered.

However, Gabriel (Lucifer), sensed the "warning bell" and quickly took care of the matter. He gave Noah one of the alternatives so that their race could continue to exist. Noah obeys and takes the alternate.

Again, after several centuries of joy and triumph, God again decides to get rid of the Alternatives, and sends his son Jesus Christ to earth, assuming that he is to save the entire human race. However, our dear Gabriel still gets ahead of the curve and steals Jesus, posing as the real savior. Everyone believes him without question.

So Gabriel wins and God is stuck on the loser's bench.

All that remains is to figure out what to do with Jesus. So Gabriel had an idea: to make some kind of initial view of the alternatives, so to speak, the "first stage" of their development. Gabriel turns Jesus into an alternative. The result was quite good: an unsightly baby with a distorted baby face, whose name was given to "The Malefactor.

To the glory of Satan!

That's it for me guys, I've squeezed everything I can out of my brain.

[circusd0g]

*me irl* : calm, confident, pretty(?), will fight you if need be

*me online* : UNHINGED, GREMLIN, VENTING!!! "screaming and crying and shaking" "OMG GUYS THE LORE THE FUCKING. THE LORE OF THIS CHARACTER I MADE" "i want him so much he is so fucking.... he's so??? SCRUNGLE, HE'S JUST A LITTLE MAN I WANT TO SCOOP HIM UP AND PUT HIM IN MY POCKETS AND SAVE HIM FOR LATER" "god this goofy guy makes me feral" "oh yeah he's cool ig *proceeds to learn everything about him thru fanfiction and becomes obsessed and starts writing fanfiction*"

[aquakris]

y’all talking about grits and oatmeal and then grayson posting that on his story wha- listen here grayson WE KNOW YOURE ON HERE

gave me a shiver down my spine like it’s a possibility this man knows what I look like, what I be saying, & shit....LORD

[ytfordeyes]

“I knew they were going out but Alfie was trying to hide it from me (…) We were doing a big job together and me and Alfie were sharing a room and in the night he was always skyping Zoe (…) One time when we were on set (…) he was messaging her all the time and I texted her pretending I was him and I said to her “Can’t wait to be cheeky tonight ;)” and her response was “We can’t because Marcus is in the room”.

[sunflowersteves]

i think a sex bot thought I was steve 💀

[optimisticcoffeedelusion]

I like Girls5Eva and Renée Elise Goldsberry almost as much as I dislike the expression Big D*ck Energy, especially when used about women, and even more especially when used by lesbians and about lesbians. Like yikes.

[toby-141]

Guess who did get up till 3pm?