hey there, fluffy! (hope you don't mind if i use that as a nick-name ><)
what would you think of an au where zim and dib have been rivals for almost a decade before finding out that the one time they gave in and spent a night together in high school ended up in zim becoming pregnant (maybe with dulce or another oc). zim keeps this a secret from dib for nearly five whole years before dib finally learns he has a daughter (purely from accident - i blame gir trying to sneak in baby clothes for the child's upcoming birthday when dib catches him).
he confronts zim, which opens up a lot of feelings between them especially ones of anger and frustration from dib not being able to even know about or see his own child, while zim still harbors shame and confusion about what happened that night, not knowing he could still get biologically pregnant.
while the two keep bickering on and on, and can't seem to meet eye to eye together on anything, the child comes out from a nap, blinking their eyes in confusion and wondering who is zimmy's new friend. dib seems a bit taken aback that the child doesn't seem to think of zim as a father, and zim also doesn't appear to have raised her like a proper dad would either.
eventually dib ends up losing almost all of his frustrations because he is overcome with a sudden urge to help take care of the girl (partly from guilt because he hadn't meant to knock zim up and leave them both on their own, and partly because a very messed up part of him is fascinated by the idea that the kid is half alien and half human both).
they agree to play-act as parents (ironically!) to help their child adjust so that they can be allowed to leave the house more often and have more of a real life, but while they are still argumentative and bitter over each other, they eventually start softening up whenever their child is around.
Fluffy! Omg!! A nickname!! Yay!! I'm so okay with that yes!
I love this idea of a passionate one night stand leading to consequences that Zim and Dib can never forget! Maybe they could have moved on from that night, pushed it to the back of their minds and focused instead on their feud with each other, brushed the incident off as a moment of weakness and nothing more.
Except that the evidence of what they did has manifested in the form of a child with undeniable proof of both of its parents. And despite how much Zim tries to hide her from Dib and the rest of humanity, he just can't. Damn it Gir! You just had to buy them clothes for their birthday didn't you? (-_-) (I'm honestly surprised he didn't eat the child before this point. Maybe because they're his master's smeets? Or maybe he tried to before and Zim stopped him before it got to far? Lol)
As for Dib's feelings of frustration and anger, I think they would be very valid and in character! Imagine not knowing you had a whole ass child that you didn't get to raise and watch grow, many people would be rightfully pissed at having that information withheld from them. That choice taken away! Especially those who have parental issues/abandonment issues, which Dib certainly has due to his own upbringing. It would further incense him to learn the truth so many years after his child was born.
On Zim's side, I can imagine there was a lot of confusion and shame like you described. Confusion regarding his body and the changes it was going through throughout the pregnancy. Shame regarding his actions and the fact that he wasn't aware of his own fertility and ability to get pregnant. Here he is, the supposed mightest Irken alive and he couldn't control himself for one night or even understand what his body was going through until it was already too late.
Not to mention the healthy dose of fear he must have been feeling as well! Like what does Zim know about pregnancy, birth, and smeet raising? What does he know about human smeet raising? Hybrid smeet raising?!? Yeah no , he must have felt hella stressed in this au (most likely worse than in Irken Empire Collapse AU because at least there he had Dib's help. Here he didn't). He was probably also very stressed regarding being found out by the Empire for fraternizing with the enemy and illegally reproducing. Oh that's not even taking into account the fear of being found out by the Earth Authorities! All of a sudden all of Dib's talk about dissecting him that he'd never really worried about, dial his anxiety up to 10 because while HE'S never had to fear much from those threats, he IS a trained soldier with experience under his belt, HIS SMEET ISN'T!! (Imagine this might be one of the reasons, if not the main reason, Zim never reached out to Dib regarding the pregnancy and the smeet, he was afraid of Dib turning on the both of them and revealing him to the authorities and being taking in to be experimented on/dissected. Oh the second Dib figures out Zim's reasoning for keeping the child hidden from him he's gonna feel sick)
I can totally see Zim completely failing Iin regards to raising his kid in a semi normal fashion, like I said, he doesn't really have much to go on when it comes to Irken raising their young, and human childrearing would probably just confuse him, so without someone (or even a basic instructions) to guide him he'd fail spectacularly (that is not to say he doesn't love them or want to protect them it just means he's not raising them in a very healthy and secure way that will lead to a healthy adjusted adult).
The smeet walking out and being confused by this stranger in their house with the adult that's taking care of them (Zimmy) is so freaking cute omg!!!
The two of them deciding to coparent after they both decide they care about their smeet and want what's best for it makes me wanna cry!! ｡:ﾟ(;´∩`;)ﾟ:｡
I think there is a level of guilt on both sides, Dib for not being able to contribute to raising his own kid after his own neglected childhood has shown him how important having a present parent is. Zim for taking away another person that could have loved and cared for his smeet when they very much needed it (and he could not provide an adequate amount of either of those things when he simply does not know how to).
Of course Dib's fascination with the paranormal and aliens would naturally steep into his view of his child. That's a child that literally represents his interests in a singular being (and he helped make them!).
I think the idea of them essentially fake dating to give their kid a nicer childhood than either of the two ever got and in the process softening up and falling in love is the cutest damn thing ever! You know their asses are whipped when their attempts at domesticity end up feeling too real. I'm just imagining the two of them settling in at the base after a school night where they had to help the smeet with their homework (not math or science because these two smart boys for sure made a smart scientifically inclined baby) and after going and finishing out the bedtime routine, they linger around each other talking to each other about their own day, despite the fact that they don't have to, that the agreement was to only put on a front of happy parents when the smeet is around. Otherwise they'll just tolerate each other when they're not around. But instead they find themselves enjoying being together when their child has already been put to bed, just talking and spending time together. Before they know it they're much closer than they have ever been before. But that's not a bad thing right? Getting along with the person you're coparenting with? Being friends won't hurt anyone. And nothing more will come from this!
When they find themselves in bed again (purely by accident!) one random night they'll think back to those thoughts and kinda regret them (liars)
@pinksugarpeach thanks so much for sending this ask in! I loved hearing your idea and giving my own input!
