hi, so idk if this is the right place, but I like your blog & you seem friendly, so: is it really that bad if I wear a JSK that’s above my knees (and by that I mean by like, 10 cm)? Most of the time I only see pictures of dresses, skirts etc that are longer but I’m quite tall and sometimes already have trouble finding clothes that fit properly here in western clothing shops :/. which makes me quite self conscious, and I can never wear shoes like anything with platforms or heels, bc I’ve heard multiple times (especially in school) how weird it is for a woman to be my height. Ok but this isn’t a place for “trauma dumping”… but just thought I’d let you know my thought process and why it isn’t as easy as just saying fuck them haters, lol. There’s a dress I really want to get but I’m worried I’ll look inappropriate or ‘ita’ or something
I had a very long post about short skirts in lolita before realizing that that's not the right answer here.
First of all, you can find examples of above-knee skirts in every lolita substyle. I'll have proof pics when I make the long post about that. 10cm/4" above the knee isn't really unheard of.
diagonal stripe JSK: models A&B (shortest, red dress) - size XS, 85cm. models C&D (tallest, mint dress) - size S, 87cm.
Here's Summer Fairy showing their same dress on five models of different heights. The model on the right is 174cm tall (5'8").
And here's a similar one from Haenuli, showing the same dress on different models.
Not all major lolita brands are going to offer a dress in different sizes. Some JSKs have adjustable straps, or are easy to add adjustable straps onto.
I know that these models aren't actually all that tall by a lot of Western standards, and it's hard to find examples of Japanese or Chinese brands that have taller models. However, that doesn't at all mean that tall lolitas (Tallitas) don't exist or aren't welcome in the fashion.
Anyway, here's like 30 something pictures from Gothic & Lolita Bible, spanning from 2002 to 2014, showing skirts that appear to be roughly 4" above the knee:
In this board are examples of sweet, classic, gothic, punk, and old school lolita fashion. You can wear skirts above your knees! You can wear them in any substyle.
The one thing to note is that not every substyle is as open to bare knees. You can wear tights with an above-knee skirt in pretty much any substyle, without much of a question. It's actually a great chance to show off printed or patterned tights, because you can see more of the design.
If you want to wear socks, it's generally helpful to wear lace-trimmed bloomers that peek out of the skirt, and under-knee socks with trim on the top. This look makes the coordinate look more like you built it with modesty in mind (a key element of lolita style). It allows you to add detail into the look and tie everything together.
Generally, I advise people to stay away from over-knee socks if they're concerned that their skirt will be too short. This is because of the sock gap (SFW link) concept in a lot of non-lolita fashion. It's possible to pull it off, but it's not something you should attempt until you're confident and won't care if someone tells you that it's wrong.
Another thing that's really common is an underskirt that either has a decorative lace or a ruffle on the bottom. These are meant to be worn under an existing dress, often to give it some additional length. The nice thing about these is that you can buy a couple of them and then wear them with everything. They're also pretty easy to make, and since the waistband isn't seen, they make a good first project to sew yourself.
If you're tall and also have a long torso, you can look to see if your dress you're looking into buying has straps that button in the back (if it's a JSK). Even if it's not adjustable, if it has that button in the back, you can pretty easily extend the straps to make the whole JSK a little bit longer. You can do this on a JSK without button straps, too, but it's a bit more involved.
On the subject of ita, a lot of things can go into something being considered ita. Generally, ita is actually a manifestation of behavior, not actually about a single garment of clothing. Buying a really garbage replica isn't inherently ita, but insisting on wearing it to an event, and then calling everyone a meanie and a gatekeeper when it's not accepted well is a behavior that you can choose not to have. The opposite of ita is humility.
If you bought a decent-quality garment, and someone talks about your outfit negatively, it natural that it hurts, so give yourself some space. But, when you're ready, go back to that conversation and ask yourself a question: was there anything constructive in that critique? If you asked someone what they thought about your outift, and they couldn't find a single nice thing to say, and they decided to just give you a solid Reasons You Suck speech, you're not the ita one. We as a community call concrit "concrit" for a reason, and that reason is that we generally aren't afraid to politely discuss with someone the cons and the pros of our outfits. If there's no con in that crit, they're just being a dick. You know how I said ita is behavior, and not fashion? The person doing the con-less crit is the one behaving painfully. You're not the ita there.
Lolita-Tips has a whole tag about body shape, which can be good to look up.
I made a whole post about how to coord a short skirt, before realizing that wasn't the question, so expect that in a few days.
