#aries incorrect

[underqualified-human]

Yuu: My crazy ass could never be a monarch. I'd just instantly go mad with power the second someone put a ring on it.

Malleus: What if I held you gently and we were happy together?

Yuu: ...

Yuu: Hmmm...

Leona: What if I supported your maniacal rise to power and we were evil together?

Yuu: HMMMM...

[underqualified-human]

Y/N: That's not a hawk, it's obviously a peregrine falcon. Facilier: How can you be so sure? Y/N: One attacked me as a small child. Facilier: Oh... that's- Y/N: It did not win.

[underqualified-human]

? Yuu, after stealing something from an RSA student: I AM ON SUCH AN ADRENALINE HIGH!

Epel: Yeah!

? Yuu: I COULD RULE THE WORLD!

Epel: YEAH!

? Yuu: I'M GOING TO MAKE OUT WITH THE CROWN PRINCE OF THE BRIAR VALLEY!

Epel: Yeah- wait what.

Malleus, in the distance: yeah!

[underqualified-human]

*Ace watching as Yuu and Grimm sort through an entire stove-sized box of Valentine's Day letters/gifts*

Ace: What do you do to them? Yuu: Fear is a powerful aphrodisiac.

[underqualified-human]

? Yuu, pointing at a statue of Ja'far: 40-year-old virgin lol

Jamil: Yuu, you can't say that about the Sorcerer of the Sands.

? Yuu: Nah, it's fine, he said it's okay, sometimes he calls me a 'desolate and pitiful oracle child' so it balances out

Jamil: There is so much about that sentence that needs explaining

? Yuu: Too bad your not getting any.

[underqualified-human]

I'm returning to my fanfiction roots and compiling some incorrect quotes I think apply to Kengan characters (did this instead of flufftober prep, so those definitely aren't coming out in time ¯\_(ツ)_/¯) also most of these are reader inserts because that's my niche lol

Lihito: I’m an idiot. Kaneda: Okubo: Himuro: Reader: Lihito: Kaneda: If you’re waiting for us to disagree, this is going to be a long day.

Lihito: We need more help. Maybe I should call my friends. Kaneda: ... Your what? Lihito: My friends. Okubo: Is he saying “friends”? Himuro: I think he's being sarcastic. Reader: No, no, no, this is delirium, he's cracked from being awake all night. Hey, Lihito! All of your friends are in this room. Lihito: I have other friends! You asked me to make new friends, I made new friends! It was a task. I complete tasks.

Reader: Fitness tip: never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness. Karla: Next time you’re working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice. Burn your ex’s house down. You can do it. I believe in you. Elena: There were so many mixed messages in that I can’t-

Reader, holding a python: Guys I impulsively bought a snake, what do I name him Kazuo: You did WHAT– Ohma: William Snakepeare

Reader: Gaolang and I don’t use pet names. Kaneda: I see. Hey, what do bees make? Reader: Honey? Gaolang: Yes, dear? Reader: Kaneda: Don't ever lie to my face again.

Kaede: Please, I'm begging you go to a doctor. Ohma: I'm sorry is this OUR stab wound? Stay out of it.

Reader, walking into a room: Sorry I’m late... I was... doing things. *Sounds of running footsteps progressively getting louder* Adam, out of breath: THEY PUSHED ME DOWN THE FUCKIN’ STAIRS!

Reader: What the fuck is wrong with you?! Setsuna: Wow, you could start with a 'good morning'. Reader: Good morning. What the fuck is wrong with you?!

Reader and Lihito skipping stones on lake Reader: It’s such a beautiful evening. Lihito, whispering: Take that you fucking lake

Hajime: What’s up guys? I’m back. Reader: What the- you can’t be here. You’re dead. I literally saw you die. Hajime: Death is a social construct.

Reader: I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it Okubo: Just rip the bandage off. Reader: It’s Kaneda. Okubo: Put the bandage back on.

Reader: I trust Kazuo. Kaede: You think he knows what he's doing? Reader: I wouldn't go that far.

[underqualified-human]

You know those projects you get in high school where you get a fake baby and have to take care of it?

[underqualified-human]

Self Aware[?] Yuu Incorrect Quotes 2

*During the Ignihide chapter*

Yuu, in a deeper voice than usual: IDIA, I HAVE COME FOR MY REVENGE!

Idia, scared shitless: Hold on we can talk about this!

-

Leona: So what's the first thing you notice when a guy approaches you?

Yuu: The audacity.

Leona: ...

Yuu: But most of you have enough of it to be attractive.

-

Yuu: If I die and he doesn't weep so hard that the sea gods can hear it, I don't want him!

*Frantic scribbling noises fill the air*

Idia: Wait what do you mean by 'if'?

Yuu: I think you know exactly what I mean

Idia: I really don't.

-

Ace: Oh good you're not busy.

Yuu, in the middle of a tea party with the rats, Grimm, the ghosts and Malleus: Actually Ace, I am busy.

-

Malleus: Hello, Grimm!

Grimm: Malleus, can I ask you a question?

Malleus: Sure! Anything!

Grimm: Why don't you go back to your own house AND STOP BOTHERING US!?

[he wants his friend henchman back]

-

*Vil notices a faint stain on Yuu's pants where something had been spilt the previous week*

Vil: Why are you wearing the same pants two weeks in a row?

Yuu: I only have one pair

Vil: What?

Yuu: Yeah it's called poverty, I don't expect you to understand it though

-

*Late night talk*

Jamil: One day I'd like to settle down away from the Al-Asims

Yuu, not missing a beat: In an itty-bitty living space?

Jamil, leaning closer: Yes, how did you know

Yuu, screaming internally: I-I also want that, minimalism is pretty appealing right?

Jamil: I suppose so

-

Riddle, scoping out his competition: So how did you first realise your feelings?

Azul: Yuu kicked my ass and I've been in love with them ever since

-

Kalim, urging him to confess: Just give it a shot, what do you got to lose?

Jamil: Hmm, let's see.

Jamil, counting off of his fingers: My patience, my dignity, my temper—

-

Anybody who overblotted: I think - I think I love you

Yuu, instantly: If you really loved me you wouldn't have missed

[Idia, regardless if he was the one confessing or not: *Wheeze*]

-

Yuu: Leona/Kalim, I'm going to need your credit card

Leona/Kalim, pulling out a wallet the size of a novel: Which one?