#asteroidtroglodyte

[the-uncanny-dag]

Doritos y lloroncitos @asteroidtroglodyte

Original post

[ratazom]

GODDAMMIT NOT AGAIN

[thatonerebelminiblind]

I’m trying to figure out what your pfp is but I must admit that I’m somewhat at a Loss

👉😏👉

[hopepunk-humanity]

A flower for your dash

What a pretty bloom!

[dejavudreamer7]

I have described The Ocean as a”Murder Chowder” before and would be happy to elucidate the many reasons it deserves that name if you would be so inclined!

I mean… I feel like I can understand why you’d describe the ocean as such, based on what context I already have, and I feel like I probably will not *like* any of the many reasons I don’t know, but I don’t ever plan to spend time in or on the ocean more than going waist deep at the beach very occasionally, so fuck it!

Tell me some disturbing ocean facts, @asteroidtroglodyte !

**don’t get me wrong, I love the ocean and have a deep respect for it, and it deserves more protection than we currently give it. But I love it from afar, you know?

[veloelo]

Tell me about these Phyrexians and their beliefs

Disclaimer: I'm going to say a lot of things in this post, and some of them may be wrong. Feel free to tell me I'm an idiot in the tags

The Phyrexians are a race of bio-mechanical creatures from Magic: The Gathering. They've been around in the lore sense near the start of the game, but I will be mainly focusing on the New Phyrexians, who left their home to invade a different people's home, because they are the main villains of the current arc and the ones I know things about.

They work around a substance called glistening oil. Glistening oil is a mnemonic liquid that holds their memories, stories ect... Its main feature however is the ability to infect other creatures and machines upon prolonged contact. This infection completely fucks you over, both mentally and physically, sapping your energy and manipulating your thoughts with its own whispers, priming you for the last step, compleation (yes i did spell it right). Compleation is the process of ripping off your skin and taking out your innards, putting a bunch of metal in there, and assimilating you into Phyrexia. Most of the time it also include brainwashing.

New Phyrexia is divided into five different factions run by the four biggest assholes in the multiverse and one guy who's actually pretty chill they are called praetors. There is:

Elesh Norn & The Church

Elesh Norn is the the leader of not only the leader of her domain but all of New Phyrexia, after she bullied the two praetors who didn't want to serve her. She is a fascist. She thinks that society would be better if everyone and everything was put under a hive-mind a strong leader's (her's) direct rule. Very strong and powerful and also incredibly terrified of one girl with a sword.

Jin-Gitaxias & Progress Engine

Jin-Gitaxias is a mad scientist with a complexity addiction. Jin-Gitaxias thinks that the world should run by smart people (him) and that anyone who doesn't know what a semi-conductor is should not have free will. He is also affably evil, showing an actual genuine want to help people... by brainwashing and compleating them. Conically a father.

Vorinclex & the Swarm

Vorinclex and his followers resemble more large angry bears than people. They don't really like sentience that much and think that everything would be better without this whole "society" thing. Subscribes to an ideology I'm going to call "evil darwinism". The person who should be in charge is the apex predator.

Sheoldred & The Thanes

The thanes are a collection schemers and their collection of brainwashed slaves vying for power. They also operate on "whoever is the most powerful is in charge" except it involves a lot more scheming. The only important thane is Sheoldred, a big evil spider lady who mind controls you with her voice.

Urabrask & The Forge

Urabrask is the only chill praetor. Instead of kidnapping and brainwashing people like the others, believes that compleation should only be a chosen fate, and allows the native population of the place the Phyrexians invaded (Mirrodin) to live area in his without being compleated. He also fucking hates Elesh Norn, and is in open(?) rebellion against her. Working with the Mirrans and the good guys to overthrow Elesh Norn and to blow up her stuff.

[doofnoof]

T-Tricck or?

TrEat?

👁️👁️

[voraciously-volatile-vulpini]

Voilà!

In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate.

This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is a vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished.

However, this valorous visitation of a bygone vexation stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin vanguarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition!

The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous!

Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you, and you may call me V.

A very valued vocalization from a vaulted "villian" and victor of values. A vexation to villains veiled in virtue and vanity, their ventures truly vile. The validity of the voice of vindication verily virtuous. To vanquish such vermin is to be the vanguard of the vox populi, venerated and valorus.

I am vivified and validated by your vocation of this verse Troglodyte.