𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝐹𝒶𝒾𝓇𝑒𝓈𝓉 𝒪𝓃𝑒 𝑜𝒻 𝒜𝓁𝓁, 𝓂𝓎 𝒹𝑒𝒶𝓇 𝒮𝓃𝑜𝓌 𝒲𝒽𝒾𝓉𝑒,
Hello, Snow White. How are you feeling so far today? I have missed talking to you like this, exchanging letters, even if we occasionally talk in your comments, haha. I hope you are in good spirits and taking time to focus on your well-being and stay connected with your true self. As always, I envelop you in a tight virtual hug.
And here comes my question:
“Is there really any value to this thing we call … living?”
"Anything that I never want to lose is always lost. This is how it's always been for me. Everything worth wanting is lost the moment I obtain it. And nothing I pursue is worth the cost of prolonging this life, this suffering."
I have been thinking about these quotes from Dazai today. If my question won't be too delicate, what, in your opinion, makes life worth all the suffering, Snow White? I want to hear your answer purely, not what other people might want to hear.
(If you don't feel comfortable answering it, please feel free to ignore it. I can find other things to ask.)
I couldn't find which post it was, but you were asked which of the BSD characters would want to be in a romantic relationship with you, and you answered with Chuuya and Dazai. You also said that you could actually fix Dazai. (I really hope my memory is not betraying me rn. 💔)
So, if you prefer, you can answer this question by pretending to speak to Dazai to make it more emotional (this is not a request!). It's entirely up to you.
Wishing you a special kind of day full of wonders.
First of all, my dear Berry, I should likely apologise because this took me so long to answer. 🥺♥️ I have been feeling fine, my dear; I hope you are feeling good as well? Thank you very much for the adorable words! ♥️
I think I wrote a kind of analysis mixed with headcanons on this, which should be in the Dazai masterlist. Though I haven’t really focused on this quote specifically, I used it as a reference to strengthen my points (if I remember correctly).
Your question is not too delicate; I will gladly answer it. Your memory is not betraying you; however, “fixing Dazai” was likely not meant in the way you might have thought. In that regard, I can’t even fix my sleep schedule, you know? How would I fix a grown-up, womanising, dangerously charming, perverted troublemaker?
Though I am confident in my ability to show him (in the most loving and patient way) that his life can have a purpose if he wishes for it. I have seen many writers portray his darling as his “reason to live”, but I find this idea to be very dangerous (for his sake; I am not talking about the hypothetical darling or myself in that matter). See the world through Dazai’s eyes for a moment. He doesn’t see any value in anything or anyone (oh, but he does; he values his friend Odasaku and Atsushi. He simply needs to see it). What happens if your sole purpose in life is another human being? Someone who could die, vanish, or simply be done with you, to put it brutally realistically? Well, you are doomed from the start.
The key here is not “Oh, I would never leave him”—I find this delusional. We are human, and anything could happen at any time. Only a purpose that can’t be killed and will live on even if you die someday can save you. This could involve helping others and finding fulfilment in doing so, like Odasaku, for example. It could also be about loving and being loved in general.
To put it more bluntly, I think Dazai searches for his “purpose for living” in the wrong places. He is likely so absorbed in his inner pain that he struggles to see beyond it. While I intuitively know how to help people out of such dark places (or rather “open their eyes”), I don’t feel truly equipped to do so with him. He could easily outsmart me; his significant trust issues would likely lead him to manipulate me in an effort to keep me at a distance, actively self-sabotaging in the process. I am unsure if my approach would work on him, but I would definitely try. That said, I suspect it would probably fail, especially since he “takes a liking to all women,” as we all know, haha.
I didn’t write this as if speaking to Dazai, but I hope you enjoyed it nonetheless! ♥️ I wish you a night full of wonders and sweet dreams, my dear Berry. ♥️
