Lilith represents the unconscious behaviors in others that we may or may not recognize within ourselves. People who experience strong Lilith themes often attract situations that make them feel hated, judged, or misunderstood, but these situations are always meant to teach you something.
To me, Lilith is like an externalization of your shadow, as well as the alchemical process of transmuting them into your power. If we were never triggered by other people, we wouldn't become aware of the parts of ourselves that still need our attention. Most people believe they could never possess the behaviors they condemn in others, but that's rarely the case. We all project whether we realize it or not.
People "praying on your downfall" doesn't really matter. What matters is why it affects you so deeply in the first place. Why do you care if they are? If you're simply existing, not harming anyone and someone is triggered by your rawness, that's ultimately their own problem. At the same time, if someone’s reaction completely destabilizes you, there's probably something within yourself asking to be examined. A lot of people aren't consciously aware of their own triggers, which is why projection is so often unconscious. The only way to become aware of most of your unconscious behaviors is through other people. Relationships expose the parts of ourselves we can't see on our own.
Lilith isn't just about where people have beef with you or where you're ostracized. It's about the wounds that become activated through other people's behavior so you can trace them back to the root and heal them instead of letting them continue to control you. I’m just saying the beef can always be constructive if you're willing to learn from it.
In conflict, Lilith asks you to point the finger back at yourself and ask, "What does my reaction to this person/situation/behavior say about ME?" Contrary to popular belief, people aren't aware of a lot of their own behaviors and bullshit. Things outside of yourself shouldn't have that much power over your sovereignty and if they do, that's something to work through, not something to endlessly project onto the other person.
I used to have these insanely inflated reactions to certain behaviors I had been conditioned to believe were "wrong" or "bad.” What I eventually realized was that I had created self-limiting beliefs around the expression of those qualities. Once I started being more curious and open minded, the easier it became for me to be aware of my reactions.
The minute you stop looking outside yourself for evidence to confirm your already biased beliefs about how other people see or treat you, you'll begin to feel more accepted—not because other people changed, but because you stopped letting your fears determine how you show up. When you stop projecting your own shadow onto others, that's when you're able to fully be yourself.