#borderline?

[morp]

once a friend called dad "borderline abusive"

[pennedbylisse]

i am convinced i either have borderline personality disorder, which leads to monthly premenstrual exacerbations or I have PMDD because it is NOT normal to feel this unstable before my period.

it's not the food cravings, the fatigue, the bloating, the cystic acne that bothers me. It's the way my relationship burn in my flames and i constantly feel guilty that i can't control this rage. it's the oscillation between being at my prime during the ovulatory phase and crashing down like icarus a few days later to the lowest of my lows. and it's a monthly thing!

i want to unalive myself. the rage wants to swallow me whole. but if i just sit still for a few minutes, it passes within a day or two and it's baffling to me how i can go from wanting to end it all, ruin it all, sabotage every good thing i have going for me and switch within a matter of hours to loving life again, having goals, having plans, having a healthy dopamine loop.

and you can't reach out to the doctor that's supposed to know how to handle this because they'll just place you on blood-clot-causing pills like a stupid dollar-store bandage over this massive crater of a problem.

I DON'T WANT MEDS THAT CAUSE MORE PROBLEMS

I WANT A SOLUTION. I WANT TO BE IN CONTROL OF MY WILL, MY MOODS, MY DRIVE.

I want to get off this hormone ride. it's not fun. it's never been fun.

[6ad6ro]

.

[perksofbeingaborderline]

4/2) except the last day. We really got to know each other on the last day he was here. It’s been maybe two weeks and I can’t get him off my mind. I keep thinking of things like a friend request as signs that he likes me. Not just this but I fantasize about us and make up things about him or fill in the blanks of whatever I don’t know. Like I could just see us having wine together at the cafe across the street. Is this defined as borderline? Or is it just one symptom out of place, one problem?

hiya anon, thanks for the asks. honestly, I don’t think this defines borderline, but I see how this could be one puzzle piece of borderline. It sounds like when borderlines have a favorite person. On the other hand, though, I had friends in college who had behaviors like this, and they were not borderline. Do you have other symptoms that make you think you might be borderline? Either way, I think it’s worth exploring why you have intense feelings for these men. Are you trying to fill a void? Are you bored and need someone to chase? Are you avoiding something by fixating on love/chemistry? just some thoughts. Wishing you love and light and all good things 💜💜

[gaylor-taylor-blog]

I really wish I could see a therapist that would actually help me. I know for a fucking fact that I'm borderline but since I can only see the therapist at my school who can't diagnose or anything I have to live with being on the wrong medication that doesn't do anything because someone talked to me for 5 minutes and just said it was anxiety and threw me on medication without any coping mechanisms or anything. Why can't I just get the fucking help I need.

[emmiedemon]

I’m kinda curious as to wtf is actually wrong with me.

[cutmefromthelight]

ah, I just love it when Criminal Minds villifies bpd :))))))