random hatchetfield headcanons i have in no particular order of importance #2/?
mr. davidson is catholic. i will not be elaborating.
wilbur cross was one of the lead scientists who created the portal into the black and white, which was why he was adamant that he be the one to test it.
on that note, peip is a joint military group. john came out of the army, wilbur and xander both came from air force. colonel schaffer is a marine.
robert's siren cop is just an early appearance of officer bailey, to me.
boy jerry and gary goldstein are twin brothers. they're cousins to paul but the matthews (and lipschitzs) simply Do Not Associate. richie is never in any danger of being sent to abstinence camp.
there were murders when ted was at abstinence camp, but they weren't by lumberaxe. they were by jerry, who also attended camp that year and met girl jeri and handled his newfound attraction about as well as grace chasity.
on a related note, part of jerry's intense hostility to pete in abstinence camp and his certainty that he's romantically interested in girl jeri comes from the fact that ted and girl jeri were friendly during that summer at camp, which he, of course, took as blatant sexual interest. i cannot state enough how close ted came to dying that summer i have so many headcanons about ted and the jerries summer at abstinence camp someone pls ask me about them
daniel (stopwatch) is gary goldstein's son
the lauters and jagermans are both hatchetmen families. that's why solomon knew where to find the black book hidden in the witchwood, and why max has been afraid of ghosts his 'whole life'.
the perkins family were historically hatchetmen, through their father's line, but their father died when they were young — before any knowledge could be passed down.














