#dead dad stuff

[memes4doom]

[frederickchiltonsdivacup]

I know that most people have never experienced this but there's 100% something to be said about that feeling when you're doing something, eating something, talking about something, watching something, making a joke about something, or making a face in response to something, and the whole time you're thinking that this is something that you do, something that you came up with, something that is completely and entirely yours, and then your mom or grandma walks by and says "Hey, your dad used to do/say/eat/enjoy that. We always thought he was weird for it. How did you know about that?" and the truth is that you didn't. You didn't know about it. You started doing this thing on your own, and now you have to accept the fact that the phrase "gone but not forgotten" isn't an observation about memory; it's also about genetics and habits and hobbies and facial expressions and preferences and feelings. As a child of death, you always thought that you were more independently shaped by your loneliness and your experience with pain rather than any parental influences, but you were wrong. Your father is still there.

If that makes any sense. Idk though.

[white-fanged]

Why do people tell me off for making dead dad jokes? What are you gonna do about it? Tell my dad? I don't think so

[petrichara]

It’s October and nine years have passed. I say it’s dark, it’s cold, it’s a season of grief. I don’t know what I’m missing, don’t know what it means. I can’t imagine a life with you here. You’re something I feel, not someone I know; the hum of the house and nobody’s home. I don’t mean to be cruel, I don’t want to forget you. I don’t want to see you in the lawn decor.

Still, the weather gets cold and you’re a creak in the knee. I’m sorry you’re a talking point, sorry you’re a myth. I miss you and I missed you. It’s all in the mist.

[thisperfectmonsoon]

hey old man.

it’s my third Father’s Day without you. grief implements new concepts of time, I guess. I’m always counting how long it’s been since.

in the beginning, I was hopeful. I believed in the healing power of time and distance, I believed in the capacity of my heart.

now? I’m just numb, I think. time hasn’t done anything but take away bits and pieces of you from my memory. I know you had such a full laugh, but I can’t hear the echoes as clearly anymore.

I lose myself in what life could’ve been, the things we could’ve done. I lose myself because you were the glue, and nobody has chosen me since you left. you made them love me then, you can’t make them love me now.

there was before your death, 33 years of before. and now there’s just this life after it.

[millybrowm]

happy father’s day to everybody out there with a dead dad. i see you. i feel you. we have each other.

[nobodyv05]

most if not all my crying sessions will somehow turn into i want my dad i miss my dad i havent seen him in so long

[professional-griever]

nothin like a lil grief spiral in the middle of the afternoon bc everything always leads back to that.