if there’s one advice i could give on new relationships, it’s this:
don’t perform.
don’t try to be the ideal girlfriend or whatever version you think love is supposed to look like.
in a new relationship, it’s easy to get lost in the emotions. we start acting a little softer, sweeter, calmer. more like the kind of person we think the other would want, and less like ourselves.
we act on our own idea of what “the perfect partner” looks like. so giving. so patient. so endlessly nice.
but that’s when you start losing yourself. it becomes a performance. and if you don’t find your way back from that honeymoon phase, you stay stuck in that role. and with time that facade will fall. and with that your relationship might too.
you deserve love. you don't have to try so hard. do the inner work.
show your true self from the start. don;t avoid conflicts and those awkward, difficult conversations. trust me relationships always come back stronger from this stuff when both the partners are willing to make it work.
understand that love is rest. love is support at your worst and celebration at your best. its not a continuous act of trying to get the other to love you daily.
love is rest.
