#dickarren

[gettiandfriends]

dickarren married couple spicing up their sex life decide to try rping the first time they met except instead of dick passing out mid argument and robbing arren the next morning, they take the argument to an inn room upstairs and fuck it out

and the experience is so mortifyingly fulfilling for both of them that afterwards theyre side by side under the covers staring wide eyed up at the ceiling like. should we start our relationship over from scratch??

i do think that in the middle of this experience arren gets visibly emotional and dick asks him what’s wrong and arren is like (still in character) you’re gonna laugh at me but…..i just suddenly had this beautiful vision of us together in the future……living in a little house, raising animals, sharing our lives with each other and our loved ones, still not tired of it after years adventuring……..weird, huh. and dick is like (holding back tears) Do Not do this to me, arren samuel bones. not while we’re literally roleplaying our younger selves.

[gettiandfriends]

arren internally upon discovering this about dick

[gettiandfriends]

MOST IMPORTANT PICREW EVER MADE!!!!!!!!!

tyermat :^)

lukigetti suyingyulani granise

fandrew bc skye had the genius idea of using one of the horns for faori’s head

[gettiandfriends]

i think it would be so funny if in yet another oc crossover event mars happens to see dick with his hair down surrounded by woodland creatures and is like that’s the most beautiful woman i’ve ever seen

mars: please forgive my forwardness, i just haven’t been able to keep my eyes off of you all night. could i buy you a drink?

dick: oh gods i’m flattered but i have a husband

mars: you deserve two husbands (internally) i’ll fuck her husband too if that’s what it takes.

+

dick: (teaching local kids about nature, helping one up and wiping dirt from their cheek, playing hand games with a group of them, generally being quite good with kids)

mars, champion of a fertility goddess: (digging his fingers into his thigh) i need her to have my children.

mars separately meets arren and also thinks he’s hot. he absolutely does not make the connection that arren’s husband “dick” is the beautiful woman he keeps seeing around

when he eventually finds out he’s devastated bc he likes arren and is therefore unwilling to make a cuckold of him, but he can also tell he’s debilitatingly monogamous so the have sex with both of them plan is not going to fly

[gettiandfriends]

HOLY FUCK I GORGOT ARREN CANONICALLY DEVELOPED A FOOT FETISH VIA ARCANE CRYSTAL RESONANCE

dick would be mortified to find out, not because he’s judgmental of the fetish itself but bc he personally thinks his own feet look weird and also can’t help but think of feet in general as being kind of unclean

meanwhile dick considers it IMPERATIVE that arren NEVER finds out about the tentacle thing

if arren DID find out he’d initially be pretty surprised, but then frown and be like “i wish i’d known while i was at the wizard’s shop in the city, i could have picked up some scrolls of evard’s black tenta—“ and dick would start slapping his shoulders and screeching at him

[gettiandfriends]

dick and arren wedding attire……….*loud sounds of thinking extremely hard*

i almost wonder if dick would wear something dress-adjacent? like i think he’d pretend not to care, but secretly want very much to feel beautiful. but of course mel and suying would NOT let that slide

hair intricately braided and a flower crown at minimum. ohhHH AND MEL would be the one who makes it, bc when they were kids dick made her daisy chain crowns all the time and his happy smile as he placed one on her head was a memory she held super dear after he left

omg maybe the one she makes is even a little sloppy if you look at it closely bc it’s something she never got as good at as him, and she apologizes bc he could have made it better and offers to use magic on it but dick thinks it’s so perfect just the way it is

every time i try to form a single dickarren thought, mel muscles her way to the front of my brain instead. WHO WOULD WIN: OC YAOI OR A LITTLE SISTER

[gettiandfriends]

one day arren comes to the realization that he HAS actually seen dick’s brand of self-hatred before - in his stepmom, though he didn’t really pick up on it as a kid. he then immediately decides he can Not tell dick because it’ll both gross him out and drive him insane

arren: no, listen baby. listen to me. all i’m saying is that you’re two of the most important people in the world to me, and—

dick: (completely hysterical) I REMIND YOU OF YOUR MOTHER?!?!!?!!?

in arren’s defense, dick and lena just happened to have similarly colored upbringings but are otherwise very different people. and also arren is much much much more into taking care of his partners than any actual Guy Who Wants To Date His Mom

in dick’s defense, even considering the above, anything remotely approaching“you remind me of my mom” is challenging to hear from someone who’s seen you naked, and dick is particularly fucked in the head about moms in general

dick: (trying to convince himself it’s not a big deal) so like……do you want to call me mommy?

arren: (confused and wary but trying to be supportive) do you……want me to call you mommy???

dick: (turning pale) ough. i feel faint

[gettiandfriends]

6/14/23

brief dickarren misunderstanding where dick finds out suying still teases arren about how his first love ended up being a lesbian (joke) (they barely dated) (they were both relieved to break up) and when dick asks if arren really doesn’t mind he goes “course not. i love her”

dick is like yikes has this purehearted farm boy been holding a candle for his lesbian best friend since they were teens? at least he’s too respectful to say anything about it to her. ig that’s honestly pretty sad for him which is definitely why i feel unhappy. no other reason.

it gets sorted out quickly tho. eventually arren just explains that “she’s like a sister to me. when i look back on us dating i get the heebie jeebies, which is exactly why that turd keeps bringing it up” and dick is like oh. cool. meanwhile suying is looking at him SO knowingly