Self Care with DID; Mandatory Vacations
[[DISCLAIMER: This is how we manage an aspect of self care in our system and something that works for us. This very likely will not work for all, if not even most systems, but it is a bit of an aspect of how we function that has helped a lot so I felt I would discuss it in case another system found it useful. It has helped us a lot the past year or so in healing and maybe something similar could help you.
It does though require a decent bit of communication work and skills to be established and a certain dynamic that not all systems can use, so it isn’t applicable to all systems.]]
Since I came back I created this general concept of “Mandatory Vacations” where no matter the level of bad timing and “it might disrupt our function if X takes a break” where essentially the whole system is notified and understands that said alter is not allowed to do much of their job and is mandated to either relax in the inner world, sit down and process whatever is tearing them apart, or just front and do absolutely nothing related to trauma, stress, or life of sorts. Meanwhile, similar to a day at work when too many people call out, the other surrounding alters split the work that the one on vacation was responsible for and pick up the slack.
It is something that has become a bit important in our system that has very high tendencies to indulge in duties, responsibilities, and work to neglect issues that need to be addressed, things that need to be processed, and rapidly deteriorate. Our system was crumbling apart without this as most of our parts were long since deteriorated and struggling to keep up with their work. When I returned, I essentially did almost every role in the system since everyone needed a mandatory vacation to reset themselves and get their minds in the right place to work
You can’t save others if you can’t save yourself sort of mind set applies to systems and roles in a system.
That being said, I guess it is my turn to take a mandatory vacation despite me being the one who is meant to issue them to others since Lucille and Riku “benched me”. So I guess until I am “better” I get to just like... pass as a male, enjoy shortered hair, listen to music that I like, and I dunno, play Hitman and Tetris.
It is odd finally having this turn around to be my turn after over a year of being back and around and having this protocol in place, but I do have to say I am glad I did add it as a protocol. It really did help.
