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A/N: I don't really care if people hate the Netflix anime, I love it. I want a season 2 right now.
the type of guy who would buy you a cowboy hat when you say you want to ride his cock
you don't have to wear the hat when you're riding him but he thinks it adds to the fun
a very touchy guy, he can never keep his hands to himself
Dante refuses to keep his hands away from your clit when you're having sex, it is a magical pleasure button after all, so even if you're doing most of the moving he still wants to give himself something to do
slaps your ass a lot, more often with just one hand but sometimes with both and always grabs you where he slapped, especially when he knows you're still sensitive
if you get tired he will lift your legs up, his arms below your knees and fingers interlocked with yours, before he starts hammering his cock into your sensitive wet hole
very chatty and will always tell you how much he's enjoying himself, or how hypnotized he is by the view of your pussy swallowing his hard cock, your pussy making his white pubic hair wet with it's slick, the slapping, lewd noise that your pussy makes when you lower yourself on him over and over
grins up at you and gives you a thumbs up when you make him come while riding him
when he wants you to ride him he will sit on the bed, pat his thighs and tell you to get on, and yes, he will absolutely also say yee-haw
has condoms in lots of different colors to make things more fun when he has to watch his cock go in and out of you
one interesting thing that he likes is to fuck you from behind but then he will stop, leave just the tip of his cock inside of you, feeling your pussy tighten, trying to pull him back in but he won't move
instead he tells you to ride his cock from this position
as much as he loves getting ridden he is still Dante at the end of the way, so of course he will find a way to be a cocky bastard about it
not like you didn't know that before you started dating, now your sex life is that much more fun, for having Dante there
𖹭 Roommate Dante walks around shirtless. Not even to show off, he's just comfortable this way. He sleeps shirtless, cook shirtless, works out in the common room shirtless.
𖹭 each time he went out of shower he loosely wrapped the towel around his hips, purposely exposing his vline leaving you some space for imagination. He'd tease you while approaching closer in that state, the smell of his shampoo and hot skin driving you crazy.
𖹭He didn't bother with knocking, just bragged into your room whenever he needed something, which resulted in walking on you while you changed countless of times. At this point he was pretty much familiar with your body curves.
𖹭 your roommate left his underwear everywhere. You had to pick up his boxers from the most random places in the apartment.
"Dante, that's literally disgusting" you picked up a pair of those that were thrown over your laptop.
"Jeez, stop being dramatic. Those are the ones that been in laundry recently. I mean I think so... Yeah..."
When it came to your underwear, whenever you hang the laundry, he can't help but take closer looks. When you weren't around he'd sometimes pick them up imagining he just took them off you.
𖹭 Dante steals food constantly. You buy snacks; they’re gone within minutes. If you ever order pizza he appears out of nowhere like a summoned demon. Each time you catch redhanded he says things like: “You weren’t eating that, right?” while already holding the last slice in his mouth. The fridge is a disaster. Half of it is strawberry sundaes, pizza boxes, energy drinks, and things you’re pretty sure expired weeks ago.
𖹭He leaves weapons everywhere. You’ll casually find a sword leaning against the couch or guns sitting on the kitchen counter like it’s normal household clutter.
𖹭 despite acting messy, he notices everything about you. Your routines, your moods or even what kind of day you had just from the way you close the front door. And that's where his affectionate side kicks in, he prepares a meal for you, gives you a massage, listen to your rants while his hand strokes your hair, his mouth whispering praises of how good you handle everything.
𖹭 flirting was waaay too normalized between you two. He'd casually call you all those petnames like "darling", "honey", even "wifey" while he watches you cooking for him through half lidded eyes. He steals your attention on purpose. If you’re focused on something, suddenly he’s talking closer, leaning against your shoulder, nudging your leg with his boot, hand brushing against your thigh.
𖹭 Dante invades personal space constantly. Leaning over your shoulder. Resting chin on top of your head. Sitting way too close. Resting his arm along the back of the couch behind you. Living together meant accidental intimacy everywhere. Brushing past each other in the kitchen, he'd usually grab your waist gently to move you out of his way. Limbs tangled when you two cramped on the couch. And at times he'd even give you a playful smack on your ass whenever he passed by. That was definitely his favorite one.
𖹭 He developed this habit of touching you before speaking. Thumb brushing your wrist, hand at your lower back, tilting your chin towards him casually. He knew that way he'd get your attention.
𖹭 Dante can't stop looking at you when you wear his clothes. Especially if you walk out in one of his shirts unknowingly looking so comfortable in it. You usually didn't wear any bra under them which of course never escaped his sharp eyes. That's exactly why he loved giving you his oversized shirts. He'd often wrap his arms around your waist out of nowhere, sliding them slightly up till your breasts freely rested against his forearms.
𖹭 whenever arguments got a little more heated up he'd always find a way to flirt the way out.
"You're so pretty when you're yelling at me, babe. You can continue if it makes you feel better."
He'd pick you up and seat you on the counter standing between your legs.
"Don't look with those angry eyes at me. Makes me wanna kiss you senseless"
𖹭 he'd ask you to help him shave his stubble. You on his lap pretending you're focusing on the job entrusted, avoiding his knowing gaze while his hands roamed over your thighs and waist, sometimes "accidentally" sliding in the pocket of your shorts.
Hello Dehlia! I happened upon your blog after my sudden re-surfacing obsession with DMC and would like to know what it would be like to have the DMC guys as your bestie ride-or-die bitch?
DMC MEN as your best friend hcns.
Hi sweetheart! Of course, hope you enjoy <3.
Characters: Dante, Vergil, Nero and V
WC: ~3300
My masterlist
Dante Sparda
Your partner in crime. Your worst influence. He is the friend your mom, teachers and the church warned you about.
And despite it all, he is your emergency contact.
The type of friend you can call at 3 a.m. because you are spiralling, and he will always show up.
(Complaining the entire time, obviously.)
"You know I'd fight God for you, but waking me up before breakfast is reeeally pushing it."
Dante forgets important things but remembers the most unnecessary, useless details about you.
Your birthday?
"Isn't it... around spring?"
Your job?
"Something-something with numbers."
Your relationship status? A complete mystery to him.
But he does remember:
Your favourite band from middle school,
Which one of the members was your crush.
Exactly how cringe you were about it.
He has you saved in his phone under a stupid name or an inside joke so obscure it would require a five-hour explanation.
The type of friend who is always — Platonically and shamelessly — flirting with you.
If you know him, you know it's never serious. It's just the way he is programmed.
"Heyyy, hotshot, how ya doin'? Don't you miss me?"
"No."
"Well, fuck you, me neither."
If some guy is bothering you, Dante instantly pretends to be your boyfriend and has way too much fun with it. He commits to the bit like he’s trying to win an Oscar.
It's so over-the-top it makes the other guy uncomfortable, but shame is not a word in Dantes vocabulary.
Now that we are on the topic, I have to clarify how overprotective he is of you. In his own way, obviously.
Like an older brother, he acts nonchalant, and he insists he "Totally doesn't care," but he does. He’s hyper-aware when something feels off, and sometimes that makes him a little overbearing.
In his defence, he lost too many people in his life; he can't afford to lose you, too.
"Text me when you get home, yeah? This ain't Wonderland, and there is a shit ton of demons out there."
Once, it was late at night. And he couldn´t walk you home, so... he just handed you Ebony and called it a day.
"You know how to use a gun?"
"No...?"
"Well, you point at the bad thing, pull the trigger, then hear something drop, and that's about it."
“Dante, I cannot use a gun.”
“Why not?”
“For starters, I don’t know the technique.”
"The general technique is that you gotta try to aim at something that isn't you."
"Well, no shit, but— "
"Alright, gotta go, babe. Bye!"
His methods are a bit insane, but hey! They work. (Kind of)
Dante is genuinely a pretty funny and chill guy. He always tries to cheer you up and lighten the mood. Especially when things are bad.
You can vent to him, and he will listen to you, plainly and unjudgmentally. Just don't expect him to open up in return or receive deeply sensitive, articulate advice.
At best, you get:
"Yeah... that sucks. Wanna get takeout?"
A guy like Dante doesn't open up to people easily. So if you’re his friend, chances are you’ve known each other for a long time, like Trish and Lady.
What's that? You want to meet Trish or Lady? Do not fret! Dante loves to introduce you to everyone in his orbit. He likes his people to know each other; it's like he is subconsciously building a little found family.
Which means you're probably close to, or at the very least, familiar with Trish, Lady, Patty, Morrison, Vergil and Nero.
And yes, you're part of this family whether you asked for it or not.
Dante is the kind of friend with whom you always end up sharing the most outrageous stories, "The Hangover"-level anecdotes.
Waking up in a hotel room you definitely didn't book? Check. ✅
Marrying a stranger in Las Vegas? Check. ✅
Gambling all your money, winning double, then gambling again and losing everything? Check. ✅
Ending up at a police station for a crime you two might have committed, accidentally or not? Check.✅
Even if you are a low-key and responsible person, you always end up in the craziest situations with him. It's like reality collapses into chaos whenever Dante is involved.
The type of guy who always invites you over for takeout. However, you will end up paying every single time.
"Sorry, sugar, this one's on you. But don't worry 'bout it, I'll get it next time."
You both know he won't, but you accept it at this point.
Yes, he owes you money. Even if you are as broke as he is.
Dante has depressive episodes more often than he lets on. You know when they happen: he becomes quieter, more pessimistic, cynical, and he sleeps too much or too little.
Dante, at his worst, is completely avoidant. He won't answer your calls or texts for weeks. Sometimes, because he is on a job, but other times, he is trapped inside his own head.
So occasionally, you're the one who has to show up and drag him out from his misery.
Dante won't ask for help, not openly. But he will ask you to hang out and have a drink at weird hours for no apparent reason.
To sum up, Dante is a complex person; his mind harbours many monsters, guilt, and nightmares, but despite all of this, he is an excellent friend.
The type of guy you can't help but love. Even if he is driving you insane.
Vergil Sparda
Being friends with Vergil is not an easy task. This is not a role for the faint of heart.
Having a thick skin is strongly advised (More on this later)
That said, if you somehow manage to become his friend, congratulations. You are very likely his only best friend for life.
Aside from Dante, of course.
Due to the lack of healthy relationships in his life, Vergil is an intense person with an all-or-nothing mentality.
This manifests in many ways, one of them being his complete inability to process and reciprocate casual kindness like a normal person.
For instance, you can do the bare minimum nice thing to him, and he will either take it completely for granted or malfunction entirely.
"Here you go, Verg."
He stares into space for a solid five seconds.
"If you require any enemies eliminated, you shall inform me."
"I just lent you a book, Vergil."
"I see..."
He is loyal. Not in a normal, friendly way, but in the way a guard dog is loyal. He will defend you in your absence, death-glaring anyone who disrespects you, or intimidating anyone who pushes their luck.
(He would stab them if given the opportunity. Unfortunately for him, Dante now supervises his activities, meaning Vergil is no longer allowed to kill people indiscriminately. This greatly offends him.)
Say what you want about Vergil, but he's a man who gets shit done...in his own way.
"My boss has been bothering me an awful lot lately. He is such a creep."
Vergil opens a portal, disappears, and returns five minutes later.
"He has been dealt with."
"What— what do you mean by that?"
"He has been dealt with."
You don't make any other follow-up questions, and that's for the best.
His version of “hanging out” is peaceful co-existence. He is perfectly content reading beside you while you silently do something else: drawing, crafting, knitting, studying, working, or reading another book.
While conversation is allowed, silence is preferred.
In the same vein, the easiest way to bond with him is to be bookish or interested in poetry.
It's just an infinite pool of conversation topics that do not qualify as tedious small talk to him. (Something that Vergil very openly loathes)
While not a talkative man at all, he is surprisingly eloquent when insulting people. Especially the ones he cares about the most. Cleverly bullying people is his way of showing camaraderie.
So, yes, he roasts you a lot. You'd be surprised at how much you get read by Vergil; he can be reeeally sassy if he chooses to.
"You have a rather simplistic approach to logical thinking."
"It seems competence continues to elude you."
Or in conversation:
"I didn't sleep much last night."
"Evidently."
"I think I handled that well."
"Objectively, no."
"Sometimes I struggle to stay focused."
"I have no doubt."
(I did warn you about the thick skin. Befriending this bastard is not for beginners.)
Thankfully, he tolerates your insults back.
"So, you chose that attire willingly?"
"I refuse to receive fashion advice from a crusty Edwardian man whose last time you washed your coat was before the fall of the Roman Empire."
Judgmental, he has the meanest side-eye known to mankind.
You know you’re his best friend when, after someone does something idiotic, Vergil immediately locks eyes with you across the room and is like:
"Can you believe this moron?"
Most would disagree, but I think he loves gossip.
He will deny this vehemently. He insists he is not nosy, and yet he knows everything.
He is always silently listening to people, and he remembers everything. Therefore, he can't help but know everything about everyone; he wants to act nonchalant and uninterested, but he can't.
"Admit it! You love gossip."
"I do not concern myself with trivial matters."
"Then, how did you know she was cheating on her boyfriend?"
"Please. Even a blind man could see the infidelity."
Or, alternatively:
"Hey, Vergil! Did you hear about—?"
"Yes."
He is not a "mom friend" by any means, but he somehow knows your schedule and responsibilities better than you do.
"Aren't you supposed to be elsewhere?"
"It seems punctuality still remains a challenge for you. You are one hour late for your appointment."
Vergil is a cold, aloof man.
He doesn't sugarcoat, offer empty reassurance or give compliments lightly.
However, he deeply respects discipline, hard work and endurance in the face of adversities. If you feel like you’ve failed or want to give up, he does not dismiss it.
"You endured what most would not."
"You remained in the face of misfortunes. Commendable."
"Do not falter. It will pass. "
Unfortunately, he has a remarkable talent for making concern sound like a threat/ insult.
"You are not use to anyone being feeble, dehydrated and sleepless. Unless you seek failure, correct this."
"You forget yourself. Humans cannot tolerate physical strain as demons do. Take a break, you fool."
"You look pathetic. Have a proper meal. We will speak later."
"Attend to your health. No one else will, and neglect has consequences."
But sometimes — sometimes — he gets it right.
"You will succeed. It is inevitable."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because you cannot escape fate."
"That's... surprisingly sweet of you, Vergil."
"Do not get used to it."
Nero Sparda
Nero is not subtle about his thoughts or feelings. If he likes you, you'd know.
There is very little slow burn in y'all's friendship. If you are an extrovert, you'll link instantly. If you are an introvert, he simply adopts you.
The one emergency contact that is actually competent. He answers the phone immediately, and before you even finish the sentence, he is already grabbing his jacket and keys.
"Hey—"
"What's up?"
"Shit, I'm sorry, Nero, I think I might—"
"I'm on my way."
He is fiercely protective. He believes you have to protect your people with your blood, sweat and tears. And to him, friends are family.
Although this is very earnest and honourable of him, Nero is a man who thinks with his heart first and his brain eventually.
If you are wronged, even if it is not a big deal, he will overreact.
He has a tendency to stand directly in front of you, argue with anyone, and escalate situations at record speed.
Sometimes it helps, because he would absolutely fight god for you.
But sometimes it does not help. Like, at all, he will actually make the situation ten times worse.
Similarly, he will defend you in conversations even when you’re not there.
"No, you don't know them. They are not like that. You know what? Fuck you, you better watch your mouth before talking shit about them."
Also, if someone interrupts you mid-sentence.
"Hey, man. They were talking."
If you have beef with someone, Nero now has beef with them, too. He forgets the details, but remembers the vibe.
"I don't like that person"
"You met them once."
"Yeah. Didn't like them. Vibes were off."
Nero is too honest for his own good.
"You look like shit. No offence."
Or, alternatively, if you're not wearing makeup:
"You good? You look sick and tired."
"I'm fine. I'm just not wearing any makeup."
"Oh— Shit. Sorry. Fuck me, I guess."
Unlike Vergil or Dante, Nero actually tries to be emotionally open. Sure, he is clumsy; he overcorrects, overshares or blurts things out.
The same applies to emotional support. He doesn’t always say the right thing, but he genuinely tries.
Strangely enough, he is excellent at hyping you up, even when it makes absolutely no sense.
"You could totally take them in a fight."
"They are twice my size, Nero."
"Yeah, but you're more... fiesty. Like an angry kitty against a Rottweiler."
Or alternatively, while watching a movie:
“Okay, but like… if the situation were right, you’d have a chance with them"
"With who? Pedro Pascal? Be fucking for real."
"Nah, you'd totally have a shot."
He loves his friends with a passion. He thinks you are way cooler than you actually are, and no amount of logic will convince him otherwise.
You will get dragged into his domestic life. He introduces you to Kyrie and Nico immediately. He doesn’t mind if you stay the night or if you make yourself at home.
Needless to say, you probably get along with them, too.
Nero is that friend who cannot whisper to save his life, nor be subtle.
"Hey, Nero. Be subtle, but behind you is my ex."
"HUH?! WHERE?!" Violently twist his head like the girl from The Exorcist.
He’s the friend who constantly tries to get you out of your comfort zone. He makes you try things you normally wouldn’t, even if you’re shy.
"Okay, but it doesn't matter if it sucks, or if you make an ass of yourself, it'll be a great anecdote later."
"Thanks..."
Also, invites you to places at the last minute and acts surprised when you can't go.
"C'mon, it'll be fun."
"Nero, it's 2 am on a Thursday."
"So...?"
I feel that he loves spontaneous field trips.
“Hey, wanna go somewhere?”
“Where?”
“We’ll figure it out on the way.”
If someone flirts with you badly, Nero physically recoils and makes exaggerated gagging faces behind them.
"Oof, that was a tough watch, man."
Nero is the friend you have all your drunk stories with. Unfortunately, he remembers every single one perfectly. Especially the embarrassing ones.
He has at least 100 unflattering but hilarious photos of you, which he uses exclusively as reaction images in your private chats.
I know I've been nagging about how loyal and how much of a good friend Nero is. Which he is! But truth to be told, he is terrible at keeping secrets.
He will beg you not to tell him anything sensitive because the guilt will eat him alive. Yet, you tell him anyway.
He lasts maybe ten minutes.
Then he sprints to Kyrie.
Luckily for you, Kyrie is a much better confidante.
He is insanely competitive over the dumbest things imaginable, especially games:
Video games, card games, Monopoly, and don't get me started on UNO.
“The fuck you mean I gotta draw twenty-eight cards?! Fuck this stupid game! What color? GREEN?! I don’t have green!”
"What do you mean you don't have green? You have half the deck in your hand!"
"I know! I fucking hate this game..."
Anyway, Nero is by far the most normal of all the Spardas. So, treasure his friendship; he is a golden boy.
V Sparda.
Like Vergil, being friends with V is a slightly surreal experience.
For starters, he is objectively a strange man. I don’t think that needs further elaboration
Second, V comes as a full package deal, because wherever he goes, his familiars are not far behind. You don’t just befriend V; you inherit Shadow, Griffon, and Nightmare as part of the arrangement.
Someone artistic or introspective will likely get along with him best. Similar to Vergil, you get bonus points if you enjoy poetry. He loves to read and talk about books with you.
If V is your best friend, it means he is always there for you.
Physically.
No, like, literally.
I mean it, V has a habit of materialising out of nowhere beside you and scaring the absolute shit out of you.
“Greetings.”
“WHAT THE FUCK — since when have you been there?!”
“Enough. Either way, here I found this book you might enjoy.”
Like a good friend, he does check in with you, but in a very odd way.
He disappears for days, sometimes weeks, then suddenly appears at your door at midnight and asks how you are, like it's the most normal thing to do.
"V? Do you know what time it is? And where have you been?"
"Irrelevant questions." (A pause) "I have been meaning to ask you, how did your job interview go?"
If you’re feeling down, V isn’t the best at traditional reassurance. He tends to stand there awkwardly, clearly wanting to help but unsure how.
He isn’t terrible at emotional support, but he does have a habit of quoting poetry at the worst possible moments.
"Grief is but love enduring..."
"V."
"Apologies."
You and V are a trauma-dump duo. About 75% of your conversations are just venting. He listens without judgment because his threshold for weirdness is nearly nonexistent, so nothing you say fazes him.
While he isn’t always comforting in a conventional sense, he is actually one of the better Spardas to talk to emotionally. He’s not as closed off as Vergil or as avoidant as Dante, and he genuinely has a way with words. (Unlike Nero)
“You do not need to suffer for your endurance to have meaning. Your persistence speaks for itself.”
What’s the antonym of pushy? Unobstrusive? Well, that’s V. He is quiet, respects space, and minds his own business.
He’s the type of friend you can go months without talking to, then pick up right where you left off, as if nothing happened.
Like Vergil, V is unintentionally funny, and unlike Vergil, he’s significantly less intimidating. So, he is just an overall more approachable and entertaining person.
However, he has no concept of conversational momentum. You’ll be mid-rant, and he’ll calmly interrupt with something like:
"This reminds me of a line by Blake."
He is also that one friend who laughs last because he didn’t get the joke in time.
You try to teach him modern slang, and he tries.
"That was... 'Based', was it not?"
That one friend who never knocks and never closes doors behind him. And once you’re close, he borrows your things constantly. Nine times out of ten, you don’t even notice they’re gone.
Most of the time, he returns them before you realise. But sometimes… he forgets.
He doesn't do all of this on purpose; he is a bit absent-minded.
One of your favourite activities with him is watching bad movies and trash TV. He observes closely, analyses deeply, and somehow understands very little.
"This narrative is... ambitious."
V is odd, gentle, present and surprisingly sincere. As your best friend, he turned into a quiet constant in your life. I told you, it is a surreal experience to have him in your life, but it is no less special.
Author's Note
Miss me? (Say yes, please), I closed the request temporarily so I could catch up a bit with them. As soon as I write a few more, I'll open them again. Ideally, sometime in January. I have plenty of requests half-finished because headcanons for Dante and Vergil come easily to me, but I struggle a tad with Nero and V.
Although I'm not one 100% sure of this blog, I might correct it in the future: I had a lot of fun writing this, especially the dialogue, but I think it is a little bit dull and monotonous to read. Like, it could be funnier. However, I think it's an overall decent set of hcns.
One more thing! I was thinking of finishing some Christmas Headcanons. But I'm not sure I will finish them on time before the holiday. I might publish it after Christmas. If so, would you guys be interested either way?
A/N: Nero with a pregnant fiancée? I need Nero to be a girl dad so bad, I'm going through withdrawals–
HE'D BE SUCH A GOOD DAD BRO I CAN'T—
"Do you need anything? Another pillow? Something to eat or drink? I can cook something.."
He would literally do anything for you, make you comfortable, since you're going to be his future wife and the mother of his children.
He's going to be patient, sweet, and so, so, so caring for you, it's almost unbearable. Nero wouldn't leave your side unless it was the bathroom, and even then, he'd be waiting by the door in case you needed help with anything.
He'd be hovering, but not in an annoying way. He's just so fucking happy that your future child was growing inside of you. Like a puppy following its owner around after they'd gotten a treat.
When you broke the news to him? He was so surprised, his brain probably buffered before it registered to him that he was going to be a dad.
And if you were pregnant with twins? It was fucking over, he was so ecstatic, he went out to scream to the whole neighbourhood that he was going to be a father of two. (I just see him doing that)
Telling Dante and the others was easy, but Vergil? Vergil already somehow knew. Don't ask me how, but he just did.
"Holy shit, my nephew finally had the balls to do it ra– eughuhuh—" "Dante, shut up. And congrats you two!"
Lady and Trish would be the ones in charge of the gender reveal party, since God knows Dante would fuck the cake up and just turn it into a gender reveal pizza.
When the cake revealed pink, Nero was awestruck for a solid 15 minutes, realizing he was going to be a girl dad. He placed the cake and hugged you, burying his face into your neck to hide his happy tears, knowing Dante would tease him about being such a softy.
In the later stages of your pregnancy, he'd help you with things as simple as carrying light groceries or cooking.
"Shhh, let me do this for you since you're carrying my little princess in there." "Nero. It's just eggs."
He would definitely talk a lot to your unborn baby, feeling how she'd gently kick.
Nero would do that thing where he'd carry your stomach to give you some relief, and he'd massage any sore areas where he could.
Prepared and ready for almost anything, listening to your midwife and OB, but totally panicking on the inside when the time finally comes when you are about to give birth.
And the first time he held his baby girl? Absolutely adorable, it'd rot your teeth. He was so scared to hold her at first, but he managed with some coaxing and encouragement. Dante took a picture of it too, dw.
"My god, she's beautiful.. just like her mama."
That's some of it– I might write an actual fic for it when I get the motivation, but I gotta feed the coup with what I have stored in my head!!! There might also be a pt.2 for this :3
🌷 pairings: dmc men x fem!reader
🌷 warnings/tags: just fluff + probably OOC
🌷 author's note: i have really bad dmc brainrot but ive never even played the games (don't ask how this happened) LOL. i kinda see these as crack hcs since im not actually familiar with their canon personalities but i hope u can enjoy it regardless!
DANTE SPARDA
always picks the worst/unhinged dialogue options bc he wants to see what happens
starts laughing if it ends up with people getting mad at each other, bonus points if they start fighting for real
"Ooooh no, he didn't like that! OH SHIT, HE PUNCHED HIM! GET HIM!!"
refers to every protagonist as dude, regardless of gender or species
adores mariokart. gets waaaay into the motion controls and nearly destroys the living room coffee table
sits behind you while you play and narrates everything to piss you off. makes a big deal when you mess up to tease you
"In a world... where she messes up every single quick-time-event-"
absolutely cracked at rhythm games, just dance is his SHIT. also really enjoys osu!
loves playing coop with you and distracting u with tickles or kisses till you get mad
he loooooooooooooooooooooooves making you mad bro is a master at ragebait
VERGIL SPARDA
he says games are a waste of time, but once he finds one he likes he will memorize every mechanic almost instantly.
huge fan of strategic games. his favorites are fire emblem, civ and mahjong. mahjong counts right?
loves playing mahjong online with other losers and beating them. however is sooo annoyed at all the fan service in mahjong games. he likes playing riichi city but had to turn on the family friendly setting and only plays with the default character.
hates RNG. avoids gachas like they are the plague
you normally game in the living room while he sits next to you reading a book. if you start to get emotional over the story, he will arch an eyebrow. he ever so slightly leans into you to comfort you
you definitely notice and give him a pointed look. he sees you staring, but keeps his eyes focused on the book. but damn him, you can see a little smirk form in the corner of his mouth
pretends like he isnt paying attention but definitely is. gets invested if the story is really good
makes a surprisingly good partner in coop games. he'll act annoyed but will carry you anyway lol
teaches you how to play mahjong so you both can play
you love it when he explains things to you
whenever he catches you staring lovingly when he explains the rules to you, he blushes a tad and his eyebrows kinda raise in surprise. but its sooooooooooo subtle.
he catches himself pretty quick but you dont miss it hehe
NERO SPARDA
loves horror games but jumps at EVERYTHINGGGG LOL ITS SO CUTE
screams like a bitch honestly
gets weirdly competitive about mario kart. he will not hesitate to obliterate you with blue shells but he'll give you lots of smooches after to make up for it
always wants to name his character something stupid.
"I'm calling him Boob lord" (he would name a pokemon this)
teases you if you get flustered over flirty game characters
"Is your face red?? Oh my god, it is, are you serious? You're gonna fall for that? It's so corny!"
thinks he can do better hehe gets a bit jellyyyy
loves couch coop. will sit way too close and will flick u in the forehead if you cause him to lose
"No you forgot the- oh my god, fine, I'll get it!"
Thanks for all the love on part one, much appreciated. FSYH is not finished but it’s also not fleshed out (pure brainrot) so if you have ideas you would like to see here, you’re more than welcome to comment or send an ask my way.
Happy reading!
Part one Part three Part four
6:57pm.
You were waiting at the front doors of a grand hotel lobby. Enzo assured that this was an intel only mission, however the heavily armed security posted on every corner had you thinking otherwise. Whoever was in there was considered a risk, and while you hadn’t known Dante for long, you doubted his ability to act tactfully.
As another man held the hotel door open for you, you politely waved your and in rejection, “Just waiting for someone, thank you.”
The man looked down your figure once more, sending you a wink before disappearing inside. You fought the urge to cringe in disgust, and looked around once more into the dark street. It was bustling with traffic as cars pulled into the valet parking, you hoped Dante would be here soon. You were starting to freeze you ass off in this thin dress, although floor length, the fabric did nothing to warm you.
A low whistle called from behind you, “Damn sweetheart, holding out on me earlier were you?”
As you turn around you can blatantly see Dante staring you down, his eyes glued to the way the dress highlights your curves. It’s not really the low cut of the dress that gets him going though (although it certainly helps) it’s the deep red colour you’ve purposely chosen to wear. The symbol alone, the idea that you’re an item is enough to make his mind jump off the deep end into his fantasies.
“Can’t show all my cards now can I?”
“Guess not,” he mutters absently, watching the way your heels clack against the stone pavement.
Once you’re close enough, you lean in, “Did Enzo send you the target details?”
Naturally, Dante reaches forth to place a hand on your waist. To outsiders you look like a couple getting comfortable, and he’s fighting to keep the act up. “Yeah, some hotshot boss man right? Has information on some demon hoard,”
“Not just a demon hoard, rumours have it that he has access to his own portal, did you read all of the report?”
Dante hums dismissively, his thumb circling your hipbone, “I was thinking about other things,”
“Like what?” You scoff.
“What’s our backstory?” He questions, eyes peering up at you.
You frown, tilting your head, “Sorry? I didn’t see a backstory in the plans,”
The man laughs, gently tugging you closer as he watches another couple walk through the doors of the hotel lobby. They nod towards each other out of curtesy, “I’m thinking we met through work friends, everyone said you were too good for me, but I, ever persistent, refused to back down,”
You laugh out of disbelief, “Are you forming our dating history? I don’t think that’s necessary, no one is going to pick up on that,”
Dante looks down at you, his expression shifting into a tense furrow, “They are going to catch us in an instant if we can’t blend in, I’m not risking that.”
This makes you pause, the break in his usual flirty character makes you second guess yourself. When you look over your shoulder into the hotel lobby you can see multiple partners chatting and drinking. Had Enzo set you up for failure? This didn’t seem like a usual business gathering. The fancy dress code, affluent crowd, and security made it seem more like a private gala.
“How long were you chasing me before I agreed to a date?”
Dante smirks, “Three and a half failed attempts over two months,”
Your eyebrow quirks, “Half attempt?”
The man sighs, waving his hand in distant memory, “You were drunk, I drove you home, and you kept spouting on about how handsome I was—”
You raise your hand with a scoff, “Not likely,” you tap your chin in though, “How about, I agreed to a fake date at a work function to avoid an ex boyfriend?”
Dante hummed, “A jilted lover huh?” He shuffles closer, in the name of keeping up appearances, he justifies, “Seems likely, poor guy I’d almost pity him.”
You shake your head in disbelief, you’re almost tempted to break out of his grasp but the thunk of car doors behind you signals that people are still walking past into the building. Instead of shying away you lean forward, tilting your head and completely invading his space.
You raise your hand, a manicured finger gently tracing his cheek, “Well, he was a disappointment. His ego couldn’t keep up with his performance, if you know what I mean,”
Dante feels a spark crackle down his spine, he’s pleasantly surprised by your adaptability. Most people like wouldn’t humour him for this long, and he’s starting to mourn that he’ll never experience this again.
His eyebrows furrow together in confusion. You roll your eyes, “Don’t make me spell it out for you Dante, have a little bit of taste,”
His sly smile gives him away, “I’d never disappoint you darling, promise,”
You hum, “We done now? I know I’m getting paid overtime, but I have got to get to my bed at some point tonight,”
“Can I join?” The quick response makes you slap his arm. Not wanting to humour him longer, you grab his hand and turn around. Dante falls in step with you as you walk towards the lobby doors, he props the door open, ushering you in with his other arm around your waist.
A door man greets you instantly, offering to take your coat. You smile warmly, turning your back towards him but before he can step forward, Dante intervenes by placing his body between your back and the doorman.
“Allow me, sweetheart. Why don’t you go ahead and find our table?” Dante murmurs.
You can see the doorman back off instantly from the corner of your eye. When you look over your shoulder at Dante, you can see why. His gaze looks murderous as he slips your coat off, you mentally applaud his dedication to the role.
Following his lead, you nod both to him and politely at the doorman, “Sure, don’t take too long,”
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he murmurs, gently dropping a kiss on your shoulder before backing up. The slight feel of it makes you pause, a tingle remains in the spot but you refuse to make a deal of it. Instead, you look over at him once more to see him walking towards the coat room before making your way into the venue.
The person of interest tonight it Marcus Wicks, a man with some very deep pockets, and interesting ties with some unorthodox scientists. Information on him is limited, as he has done a good job sticking close to the shadows or having other informants do his work for him.
You catch sight of the man as you walk over to your table, he’s standing near the corner, surrounded by what you assume is associates chatting around him and security behind him. He looks over his shoulder to ensure they’re there before being pulled into a conversation.
Paranoid much? You look over the name plates on the table, stopping when you see yours and Dante’s. You’re not sure how Enzo managed to get you both into this venue, but you’ve learnt not to question it if it’ll save you the headache. You’ve barely just sat before the lady to your left turns to you.
“My, my that gown is gorgeous, what a beautiful colour,” she gushes.
You smile politely. “Oh, thank you, you’re too kind. I could say the same about you,”
The lady waves her hand, “Oh, this old thing. I didn’t even bother buying a new dress, I’ve been to so many of these things by now, they’re starting to get boring. I’m glad to see a new face,” she grins, “Are here with someone?”
You lean in closer in an act of interest, if she’s been here for a while she could offer some insight about Marcus. You’re about to ask but she cuts you off with a wide flourish of her hands, “Wait! I’ve got the perfect guy for you! He recently moved here, tall, good looking,” she leans in a closer with a whisper, “Rich too,”
A hand drops on your shoulder, “Goodness sweetheart, trading me in already?” You look up to see Dante had made his way over, “I know I was in the doghouse but I didn’t think you’d get rid of me that fast. What can I do to make it up to you, my love?”
You laugh, placing your hand over you chest and on his, “Don’t be dramatic, I was just about to introduce you,”
The lady in front of you gasps, “I’m so sorry! I just assumed because you had no ring, my husband is always telling me to think before I speak, oh god how embarrassing,”
You smile in reassurance, “Please, don’t apologise, it’s not a big deal,” you pat Dante’s hand, “This is Dante, my partner,” the sentence rolls off your tongue smoothly.
Dante squeezes your shoulder, “Pleasure to meet you…” he draws out.
“How rude of me, I don’t believe we introduced each other. Vivian,”
You introduce yourself in turn. The first thing you learn about Vivian is that she is one nosy lady, she has gossip on just about every person present in the building. Dante stands as a steady shadow behind you, thumb rubbing the juncture of your shoulder and collarbone gently as he half listens, half surveys the room.
“Mr.Wicks, or Marcus, is a new addition to our little events. I can’t remember who invited him, he just showed up one day and quickly became a popular patron,” Vivian takes a sip of her wine, “Probably because he has all the money in the world to burn,”
Your eyes widen, “He really has that much?”
“That much, and more darling. He’s got a very successful data broker company that keeps his hobbies afloat.”
Dante leans over your shoulder, “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to introduce myself to the others,”
You look over at him, “Sure, I’ll see you soon,”
You watch as Dante walks over to a group of men nearby the open bar. He bumps his elbow into one of the men in a friendly gesture, shaking his hand with a broad grin. He’s a natural at this. You almost shake your head in disbelief, it’s like he has a pull that draws people in. One that you’re starting to fall victim to.
Vivian chimes in, “You two are gorgeous together,”
To save yourself from an embarrassing flush, you reach for your drink, “Thank you,”
“No, really, I’ve never seen a man so enamoured,” is that jealousy you hear? “It’s like you fit in each others shadows, a complete match,”
You take a sip of your drink before responding. Pondering how you should go about this conversation, “We’re not perfect,” you laugh, “We’ve had our fair share of fights, that I can assure you of,”
Vivian hums thoughtfully, “What’s your secret then? What keeps you two together?”
At this, you grin, “Stubbornness.”
After a few moments you manage to get out of Vivian’s spotlight and steer the conversation back to Marcus. You lean that his hobbies include everything about demonology, and portals.
“Gateways to other dimensions, he calls it,” she waves her hand dismissively, “I couldn’t tell you anything else I tuned out after that. Honestly, what a load of garbage right? Who believes in any of that?”
You nod and take it all in while Vivian has another sip of her drink. Heavy drinker. While what she has told you isn’t anything new, it’s good to have your information solidified by another person.
Before your conversation can continue, a man walks up on stage, “Ladies and gentlemen if you could please make your way to your seats. The event will start soon.”
You watch as every begins to weave between tables to their seat, whispering to each other. It’s not long before Dante drops himself down beside you, he places his hand on your thigh and leans over to whisper in your ear.
“How was your gossip session?”
You hum, “Information was confirmed, nothing new though. What about you and your gentlemen club?”
You can hear Dante inhale, his hand gently rubbing up and down your thigh, “Afraid the club brings bad news,” this makes you frown, “Apparently Marcus is unveiling a project tonight for his loyal followers,”
You tense, rigid enough that Dante squeezes your thigh in reassurance, but that alone is clarification enough of your suspicion.
“He has a demon. Here?” You murmur, trying to keep your breathing even but your heart rate has picked up.
“Yes,” he exhales, “You should sneak out now, I can meet you—”
The lights abruptly cut out, you can make out a screen being lowered as a projector clicks on. When you look over your shoulder you can see Dante is already seeing the same thing. Security closes the door and swiftly locks everyone inside.
“So much for plan A,” Dante mutters.
You don’t know how he can be so calm. Well, you do know, demon hunter and all, but you’re freaking out. Heart rate elevated, your breathing gets heavier, and you think you’re getting dizzy but that could either be the alcohol or paranoia talking.
“I’m not going to let anything happen to you,”
You whip your head around, facing him directly, “You can’t promise that,” you hiss hysterically, “We don’t even know what we’re up against,”
Vivian looks over at you quizzically, concerned about your rising tone. You smile pleasantly, and pat Dante’s chest patronisingly. She smiles knowingly before turning back to her husband.
Dante leans closer, talking lowly, “Have some faith in me please, sweetheart, this is my job we’re talking about,”
You search his eyes, in the light of the projection screen you see nothing but confidence. Everything from his expression to his body language suggests he has nothing to fear.
You close your eyes and breathe in deeply, when you look back at him, he has an unreadable expression on his face, “I swear Dante, if I come out of this with even a scratch, I’ll be pissed off,”
Marcus makes his unassuming entrance onto the stage. There’s nothing out of the usual with his appearance, just an average looking business man if you didn’t know any better.
“Ladies and gentlemen, thank you for joining me tonight. As you may know, all your efforts and contribution to my project has come to fruition,” he raises his wine glass, “Please join me in a drink, for this is a celebration of our hard work.”
Applause erupts around the room, you hesitantly join in but Dante remains still with his arm draped across the back of your chair. The rooms becomes quieter as security rolls out a large cage, the contents are covered— typical— by a white sheet.
Marcus goes on, with what you honestly think, is a tangent about his passion for otherworldly dimensions and demons from hell. You can’t find yourself tuning in as much as you should, far too distracted by the cage that sits quietly on stage. Why is it quiet? You would have thought the demon inside would be kicking up a storm in its captivity, but not even the sheet is moving. Is it sedated? Who has their hands on demon grade sedative?
You tense when Marcus walks over to the cage, “And now, the moment you’ve all been waiting for,” his hands grasp the sheet, “Feast your eyes, on what is only the beginning of our journey.”
The sheet flies off with a flourish, falling to the ground below the stage, gasps sound from around the room including your own.
The cage is empty.
“Oh, fuck,” you panic.
“Fuck.” Dante sighs.
A strange shadow crosses the projector lens, cause the screen to flicker. You look up at the ceiling, in the darkness of the room you can see a bulking shadow. Hovering right above you.
You clench Dante’s thigh, “Dante—”
“I see it.”
Through your peripheral you can see him gazing up at the ceiling, “Get under the table.” He demands.
You don’t really want to let go of him, it feels more dangerous separating from him than finding cover. Hesitantly, you start to shuffle off your chair slowly to not cause suspicion.
Vivian looks confused as you go, “What are you doing?”
You’re already sitting on the floor when she asks, you make a shushing motion, “Follow me,” you whisper, taking her by the wrist and not taking no for an answer.
Once you’re under the table, she asks again, “What on earth is going on?”
You can hear a chair dragging across the floor beside you, “Where is it then?” Dante calls out. You cringe at his brash attitude.
“Where’s what?” Vivian she asks quietly.
You don’t answer, but Dante does, “The demon? I was promised I would see one tonight.”
You can’t see Marcus’ expression but you assume it’s not a friendly one. You can hear footsteps closing in, security probably, trying to search the perimeter. A unearthly growl reverberates across the room, silencing everyone.
You can see Vivian open her mouth but you slap your hand across it before she can speak. She’s frowning, you’re about to try and placate her when something heavy drops onto the table about your head. It rattles the cutlery and you can see wine glasses fall off the edge.
“Wow,” Dante whistles, “Now that’s what you call an entrance.”
The room erupts with screams, people frantically getting out of their seats and dashing for the exit. You stay perfectly still, even as the table worryingly starts to rattle and tip.
“What is that?” Vivian cries.
“A demon,” you try to say as evenly as possible. You can hear Dante in the background trying to lure the demon off the table.
“What?” Suddenly she looks around frantically, “My husband, what about—”
“I really wouldn’t suggest leaving here right now,” you whisper, “Wait for Dante to lead the demon off the table,”
She stares at you for a moment, “You’re being serious,”
Sounds of cutlery falling crashes around, “Yes,”
“And just what does you partner do?”
You look away, “He’s a demon hunter,”
“A demon hunter,” she frowns, “How did you get in tonight? Who do you know here?”
You sigh, looking at Vivian squarely, “Now is not the time for the full story but I think you’re smart enough to piece it together anyway,”
Vivian looks at you for a long moment, “I want to get out of this alive,” she says finally.
You nod, “Me too.”
You both agree to stick together in solidarity, holding each other’s hand tightly. You hear the demon screech terribly above you.
“That one hurt big guy? Why don’t you come do something about it?” Dante taunts.
Heavy footsteps crack the table, causing splinters to rain down on you. They reach the end of the table, slowly you shuffle back, bringing Vivian with you. When you reach the opposite end, you hesitantly peek out from under the cloth, you can see the stage, now empty, but surprisingly no blood spilt. You hope it stays that way.
You can see an emergency exit door beside the stage, you could make it if you dashed for it. The tablecloth drops as you slip back under, you tug your dress up and reach for your heels.
“What are you doing?” Vivian whispers.
“Take them off,” you respond, “We have to make a run for it.”
Vivian quickly follows your direction. With heels abandoned, you wait for Dante’s signal. Listening carefully you can hear something being thrown before landing with a thunk, the demon responds with a resounding roar.
“I have enough knives to throw to last me all night,” is he being serious? “Are you gonna make the first move? Or do I?”
The table creeks once more, you grab Vivian’s hand. “Get ready.”
The table tips with the demons weight, exposing your place of hiding. You take your chance as the demon launches itself at Dante. Keeping low you dash for the emergency exit door, Vivian close behind you. Vivian lets out a terrified gasp, alerting the demon. Its head whips in your direction but you keep going, dragging Vivian even closer.
The demon is about to turn around when Dante runs for it, you only catch a glimpse of it but you swear you see him summon a sword out of nowhere.
“Oh no, I’m not done with you yet.”
You shoulder the exit door open, shoving Vivian through and then slamming it closed again as if that would be enough. Once it’s closed, you grab her hand again and leap down the stairs until you see the doors leading outside.
You gasp, breathing heavily. It’s not safe yet but at least you’re out of the perimeter. It’s raining heavily now, and you’re getting soaked to the bone.
You glance over at Vivian in her deep purple dress, she wraps her arms around herself. “What do I do? My husband…is he alive?”
You swallow, “I don’t know,” you whisper, “But Dante is doing all he can, don’t lose hope yet.”
She nods absently. You can hear police sirens in the distance.
Not long after, you were ushered away from the lobby doors by paramedics begrudgingly, despite explaining you weren’t hurt. But they insisted you get out of the rain to avoid hypothermia, so now you sit increasingly anxious in the back of an ambulance with a blanket over your shoulders. You can hear gunshots, even a few windows shatter.
It felt like forever before it finally went silent. Moments passed before you saw police securing civilians out of the building. You leap out of the ambulance, despite the worried shouts of paramedics you run for the doors. Staying behind the parked police but looking anxiously.
Familiar white hair can be spotted easily amongst the crowd, “Dante!”
You can see him more clearly now, his clothes are torn from what looks like claw marks. And there’s bloodstains, of either his or the demon’s you can’t be certain. His head turns in the direction of his name, spotting you instantly. He walks over, mid-conversation with the police, which irks them you can see but they don’t try to follow him.
“Missed me?” He smirks.
You exhale, relieved to see him okay, “All pieces of you accounted for?”
“All the important ones anyway,”
He smiles, tucking your drenched hair behind your ear, “I told you, you’d be okay. Look you even made it out with no scratches. Damn, I am good at my job,”
“You scared me half to death,” you exasperate.
Dante looks at you for a moment, “You care about me, sweetheart?”
Your eyes widen at the insinuation, you look down at your bare feet to avoid his gaze. You were just put through an intense situation, one that you were nowhere near prepared for. And you don’t appreciate that being downplayed.
“Yes, I do care, for you wellbeing,” you hiss, “You are one of my hunters, and what you did in there was reckless at best! Taunting a demon like that, are you fucking stupid?”
“I like it when you call me yours,”
“Don’t deflect the conversation—”
He steps closer into your space, you’re practically chest to chest, and the height difference causes you to look up.
“I am fine,” he emphasises, “Renowned demon hunter, remember? I know my limit, and I don’t need you to worry about me,”
“You’re impossible,”
Dante shrugs, “Get used to it angel, because you’re going to see a lot more of it.”
You can head Vivian in the background shouting her husband’s name, when you look over you can see her leaping into his arms. You let out a sigh of relief, you’re glad they got reunited. Her husband hugs her tight as she sobs into his arms.
“Saw what you did in there, brave of you,”
You look away, “Kinda stupid separating them though, worried her for nothing,”
Dante hums, “He was lucky this time that I was there, you though, you saved her. Sure we can’t make a hunter out of you?”
You look up at him, eyebrow raised. “Maybe not,” he second guesses, “Then who would greet me after my missions?”
“Enzo?” You guess.
Dante scrunches his nose, “Nah, he’s no way near as hot as you,”
You roll your eyes, “Walk me home?”
Dante nods, removing his damaged jacket and draping it over your shoulders.
writing these is so funnnn. i lowkey want to make nsfw headcanons for their devil triggers, too, but we’ll see.
as always, thank you for reading and hope you enjoy !
yours, obscura
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
Dante is literally a lap dog. He’s the more needy one after sex - hands glued to your limbs, head buried in your skin. He’s a sensitive guy deep down, and he needs the reassurance that you’re not just gonna up and leave him after getting what you wanted. He’ll go as far to lay on top of you just to ensure you don’t leave the bed too soon.
He’ll of course make sure you’re okay after. He’s already got a drawer in his nightstand filled with snacks and water on hand to feed you, replenishing any nutrients he might’ve sucked out of your body. Big on post-sex cuddles and pillow-talk.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Dante loves his arms, but more specifically: he loves your face when he flexes his muscles or lifts a piece of furniture without breaking a sweat. He walks around the house and office shirtless just to show them off.
If we know Vergil to be an ass man, it’s only right that his twin is a tits guy. I mean, we’ve seen Dante ogle at those adult magazines - the man loves a good rack. But with Dante, all tits are in fact created equal. Any shape, size, color - doesn’t matter. He’s grabbing them, squishing them, shoving his face in them. I think he also has a thing for thighs. Let him lay between them and he’s in heaven. He’s even offered you a crumpled five dollar bill to squeeze the life out of him with them.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
This man is FILTHYYYY. You know Deepthroat by Cupcakke? Yeah, he’s blowin’ bubbles with sperm. No matter the gender, Dante is a fiend - begging to be covered in your release.
When Dante comes, it’s more of a dribble/gush, than a straight shoot of ropes. ‘The fountain of youth’, he calls it. Dante doesn’t care where it goes as long as you’re happy, though he’s partial to covering your chest in cum, watching it drip down only to lick it off himself.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
Panty thief. ((God, I hate the word ‘panty’)). BUT IT’S TRUE. Your favorite pair will always go missing and sure enough, Dante has it either in a drawer at the office or stuffed into the inner pocket of his coat. It’s mostly for the reason you think, but he also keeps it for sentimental reasons. He’s a sentimental guy, after all. You two always squeeze in a good fuck before he leaves for a job, and he’s sure to swipe up the pair you wore that night as a reminder of you and what he’s fighting for, keeping it zipped up in the pocket by his heart.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
Dante ACTS like a Casanova, a real playboy, but in reality, he’s scared as hell of intimacy. He’s had a handful of one night stands and drunken hookups but they served more as distractions than actual points of experience.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
Cowgirl, sideways 69, leapfrog (variation of doggy)
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Laughter is necessary in the bedroom for Dante. His job is awful, his life is literally hell - he needs the light moments with you to unwind and remind himself that there’s more to life than killing and being miserable.
This man thinks he’s a comedian. He’s telling you a damn knock-knock joke, expecting you to say ‘who’s there?’ while your mouth is wrapped around him. This being said, Dante is excellent at reading a room. If the situation calls for more serious or passionate love-making, he can switch off his playful side for a while.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
C’mon, we’ve all seen the man - he’s hairy. Soft silver hair starts at the stubble on his chin and goes allllll the way down to his damn ankles. Would probably be inclined to trim his nethers, if he was home more often or if you had a preference for it. Otherwise, it’s homegrown and all-American, babeeyyyy.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Big ol’ teddy bear - kisses all over, sweet words murmured in your ear. Dante isn’t the most materialistic or showy lover, but he’ll make you feel like you’re the most prized diamond in the world. Takes his time with you, makes sure you’re comfortable and he’s doing everything right before he even thinks about getting off. Big on communication, wants you to talk him through it as he does to you. He’s not the most romantic man, but he’ll definitely do his best to keep you happy and loved.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
Dante will jack off if the wind hits him wrong. It’s an outlet for him. When he’s sad, angry, happy, whatever. He’s not all that good at expressing his emotions, so having a moment of release sort of helps him let go of whatever is on his mind.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Breeding, humiliation, edging, impact play, pet play. Anything where Dante can let loose and let his guard down. All of these are reciprocal - he’s a true switch. Loves to have you bent over his knee, hand marking up your ass as punishment one moment, to flipping the tables and having you walk him around the house with a leash.
PRAISE KINK. Dante is a glutton for your words. He’ll sit and pout til you tell him he’s a good boy, or how pretty he is. There have been multiple occasions where he’s come just from praise alone, cock twitching in the air as you whisper compliments to him.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
Really anywhere he can have you, doesn’t matter to him. He’s always busy, so he’s taking any chance he can get. The default is usually the leather couch in his office, since he’s there more than he is home.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
Dante loves a good sext. Send him a picture of you in an old band shirt of his or a message about how much you miss him, and he’s almost causing a five-car pile up on the freeway just to turn the car around as fast as physically possible.
Is also stereotypical in that if he comes home to you splayed out on the bed in a piece of lingerie, he’ll literally (and I mean, literally) tear his clothes off as he scrambles to you.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
Sex for the sake of sex is borderline a no for him. If you two have been together for a while, it’s different, but if not, he’s not putting out. Not only does he have trust issues, Dante has a lot of insecurities and trauma. He’s not fucking someone just to watch them leave him - it hurts too much.
Dante’s a pretty easy-going man otherwise. If you’re happy, he’s happy.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
I know I said Vergil is a munch, but man, so is Dante. But in a different way. Dante is a tease, and loves to get you riled up in the most mundane situations. He’ll be stationed between your legs while you watch a movie in the living room, lazily licking stripes just to keep you on edge, or squatted behind you as you try to cook dinner. He’s a nuisance, really, but there’s no use trying to shake him off. He’ll get whiny and huff around til you let him keep going.
Dante is more of a giver. He almost never asks for oral and usually dismisses it, unless you ask specifically. But if anything, it’s more for you than him, knowing how much you love to gulp down his seed.
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Dante has a tendency to get a little too enthusiastic, unless he’s purposefully trying to play the long-game and tease you. He’ll try oh so hard to go slow for you, make it last, but he just gets too excited. He can’t fathom that someone is actually letting him fuck them, and damn, you look perfect underneath him. If he slows down at all, it’s only because he’s trying to have a sliver of self-control as to not come prematurely.
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Quickies are the norm for you two, not that Dante minds. Again, he’s often shuffling a lot so it’s rare that he can set aside a whole lot of time for you two. Any opportunity with you is fair game.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
I feel like it’s obvious that Dante is an adrenaline junkie. He loves the thrill of new things. He’ll go as far as his partner will take him, as long as it’s within reason and no one gets seriously hurt (or arrested).
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Back to back to back to back. The devil blood in him works overtime when he’s in the mood. Even if you’re wiped after two rounds, he’s pulling you back down by your ankles, asking you in that bedroom voice you love so much to give him one more, to show him how good and sweet you can be.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Dante is a big fan of toys. He’s holding a vibrator to you while he does paperwork, or he’s shackled to the bedframe with a gag and cage around his tip. Probably wouldn’t be all that experienced with them initially, but once you two are comfortable, he’s happy to acquire a good collection.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
The most annoying, frustrating man you will ever let into your bedroom. Dante loves to tease more than he might even love fucking you. He’ll spend hours saying suggestive things, grabbing your ass, toying with your clothes, only to walk away and act indifferent until you beg him to give in. It’s borderline evil.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Dante never shuts the fuck up. Ever. Doesn’t matter what you’re doing, who’s on top, where you are - he’s either talking or moaning. He’s an extremely vocal lover. The neighbors have already put in two noise complaints from how loudly Dante groans and swears when you two are together.
Constantly in your ear, mumbling nonsense and praise. Whiny, loud, and obnoxious - and you wouldn’t have it any other way.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
There’s no section here for top/bottom, unfortunately, so I’ll put this here: loves to get fucked as much as he loves to do it himself. Whether you got the parts, or you gotta use a strap for it, the man is more than happy to have his head pressed into the pillows as you ram into him. He’s a sloppy, whiny, needy bottom, and I’ll die by that.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
As with Vergil, Dante is not a small man. Only an inch shorter than his twin, he carries a lot of height. I think it’s canon (?) that Dante is not as big as Vergil in the meat department. I’m banking on a hard 7, soft 5. Grower, for sure. What he lacks in length is made up for in girth.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
It’s damn near incessant, even as he ages. Dante hasn’t honed in his devil side as much as Vergil, which means he has less control of his hormones. If he’s not too stressed, he’s constantly waiting for the next moment to get his hands on you.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
Dante will literally pass out the second his head hits the pillow. He’ll stay awake for a bit to make sure you’re all good, but the second he lays down, it’s lights out. And he’s out for the entire night, snuggled into your side and snoring away til late morning.
Hugging Headcanons for Dante, Vergil and Nero that have been in my head
Dante: Isn't much of a hugger since he keeps people at arm's length. Literally and figuratively. There's a part of him that thinks he's a curse and his affection brings people to ruin. I see him as being tactile in back pats, shoulder clasps and ruffling hair. He'll linger in your space, not too close but enough that you know he's there. When he does hug someone, it's a full on hug. He's got both arms wrapped around you while swaying from side to side. Sighs against your hair because it's been a while and he used to be so affectionate when he was smaller. There's relief in the sound like he really needed this. When he pulls back, he keeps his hands on your shoulders for a second before pulling away.
Nero: I think that even if his adoptive parents didn't like him much, Nero still received hugs from Credo and Kyrie. Then his arm changed and he distanced himself from them and everyone else. The fear that he'll be found out if someone gets to close became suffocating. If you initiate a hug, dmc4 Nero would hold one side of his body far away from you, basically just giving you a side hug. He'd also grumble about it the entire time but he doesn't push you away. Even when the sling comes off old habits die hard. I think Nero almost always gives side hugs either because he's in a rush or the distance makes him feel less on edge about the affection. However, I think if you melt and wheedle him enough, Nero would give you a proper hug. It's not tight, his arms are loose like he's waiting for you to spook and wrench yourself away from him. He rubs your back and gives you a gentle pat pat when he pulls away. Never makes eye contact afterwards, he looks off to the side and complains about you being sweaty and needing a shower even if you smell like a garden of roses
Vergil: Oh man, the amount of time and trust you need from this man to get One hug is immense. Touch has equated to violence and pain for him for a long time now. He can't remember the last time someone gave him a tender touch just because they could. I see him as the type of person who prefers to share space to show affection like hanging out in the same room in silence. He's like a cat, he wants affection but he'll lash out if you give him said affection before he's ready for it. Vergil will teleport right out of your arms before they fully close around him if you don't give him a warning. Asking him "can I hug you?" Will result in a harsh look. Most of the time, he scoffs and walks away but the one time he gives a single terse nod, he's tense as a board. He doesn't hug back the first time or the second time but he doesn't stab you either. If he didn't want to be touched, you'd Know. His face is stern as it always is and maybe, if you knew him well you'd be able to read the slight twitch of his brow. After a while of desensitizing him to affection, of asking and not demanding, he'll raise one arm to wrap around you and rest his chin on the top of your head
