Teaching = connecting
Teaching, at its core, is a deeply human endeavor. Beyond instructional strategies and curriculum outcomes, what often sustains teachers through the demands of the profession is not just the act of teaching itself but the relationships formed within it. Human connection in the classroom is not a sentimental bonus; it is a central, evidence-based contributor to both teacher effectiveness and well-being.
Educational psychology increasingly acknowledges teaching as an emotionally laborious and relational practice. As Hargreaves (1998) asserted in his seminal work, The Emotional Practice of Teaching, "Good teaching is charged with positive emotion. It is not just a matter of knowing one's subject, being efficient, having correct competencies, or learning the right techniques." Rather, good teaching “arises out of the relationships teachers build with their students.”
This idea is echoed and expanded upon by Sarah Mercer (2016), who emphasizes that language teaching in particular is inherently affective and relational. She argues that the quality of interpersonal relationships in the classroom significantly impacts both learner success and teacher well-being. Teachers who feel connected to their students are more likely to experience intrinsic motivation, job satisfaction, and resilience (Mercer, 2016; Yin et al., 2019).
From a cognitive science perspective, the social brain hypothesis suggests that our brains are evolutionarily wired for connection (Dunbar, 1998). Social interactions stimulate neural circuits related to empathy, reward, and meaning-making suggesting that the emotional bonds we form in classrooms are not only psychologically satisfying but neurologically reinforcing. This could explain why something as simple as a student’s enthusiastic participation, or an appreciative glance during a lesson, feels deeply rewarding.
Positive psychology offers further insight. Fredrickson’s Broaden-and-Build Theory of Positive Emotions (2001) posits that positive emotional exchanges such as those between teacher and student enhance our cognitive flexibility, build resilience, and create upward spirals of well-being. These brief yet powerful moments of interpersonal resonance contribute not only to teacher flourishing but to more dynamic, trusting classroom environments.
In practical terms, these human interactions can turn a routine lesson into something meaningful. A simple “thank you” after class, a student bravely asking a question, or the shy learner finally laughing out loud, these micro-moments of trust and joy are small, but they accumulate. They are often what teachers remember long after the term ends.
As a language teacher, I often receive affirmations from my students, verbal and non-verbal, that they feel safe, seen, and engaged. These connections don’t just help them learn. They help me teach.
There are days when I enter the classroom exhausted, uncertain, or quiet from life’s weight. And then, something shifts. A student greets me with a smile, another asks a follow-up question from yesterday’s lesson, and sometimes the quietest one says, “I like today’s activity.” These may seem like small things, but in the life of a teacher, they are everything. They remind me that presence matters. That being human in the classroom isn't a flaw; it's a gift.
And so, while we prepare our materials and plan our outcomes, it’s worth remembering that no learning happens in a vacuum. The relational space we co-create with our students may be the most powerful pedagogy of all.
It is in those shared silences, honest laughter, and mutual care that we not only build understanding but belonging. And in that belonging, we teach and are taught in return.
How do you nurture meaningful connections in your own learning or teaching spaces?
Selected References:
Fredrickson, B. L. (2001). The role of positive emotions in positive psychology: The broaden-and-build theory of positive emotions. American Psychologist, 56(3), 218–226.
Hargreaves, A. (1998). The emotional practice of teaching. Teaching and Teacher Education, 14(8), 835–854.
Mercer, S. (2016). Teacher well-being and the complexity of language teaching. In Gkonou, T., Tatzl, D., & Mercer, S. (Eds.), New Directions in Language Learning Psychology (pp. 103–123). Springer.
Yin, H., Huang, S., & Wang, W. (2019). Work environment characteristics and teacher well-being: The mediation of emotion regulation strategies. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 16(24), 4701.
Dunbar, R. I. M. (1998). The social brain hypothesis. Evolutionary Anthropology, 6(5), 178–190.
