#elliottiguess

[autism-asks]

Good afternoon, everyone!

We are super excited about bringing original video content to Autism Asks. But that’s not the only thing we’re excited about!

We were recently contacted by Elliott, a trans masculine autistic, and asked if we were interested in content creators for the Autism Asks video channel. I talked at length with Elliott about his current videos and about what he might do in the future - and then discussed the idea with Sabrina to figure out how best to handle additional creators.

I am super excited to announce that Elliott is the first featured content creator on Autism Asks.

As he creates videos for his channel we will be adding them to his playlist on our own channel, and of course letting you know when there is a new release! We will also create new playlists as Elliott creates new series’ on his channel.

As of right now the entire library of Elliott’s first series, detailing his thoughts, feelings, and processes of transitioning, is available for viewing.

Why are we featuring this content?

Transition is clearly not for everyone but it is a topic that is exceptionally important to the autistic community. Many of us have a complicated relationship with gender and transitioning socially, medically, or both.

Within the next week or two we will be queuing the release of Elliott's existing videos and featuring them here and on YouTube on weekly basis. Alternately, you can view the entire series on our channel right now.

Elliott’s series is very frank about the often unsettling aspects of transition and may discomfort or trigger viewers. As of yet there are not content notes on individual episodes, so please take care when viewing. We hope to provide them in the near future. Until then, general content notes for Elliott’s current series are available for viewing as part of the play list description on the Autism Asks channel. Please review these notes before viewing.

I hope you like his series, and that you find it informative and helpful in understanding the process of transitioning as a trans masculine autistic.

- Sam

Featured Playlist - Elliott’s Transition

[aphelion-necrology]

Transition feels like giving birth to yourself.

Transition feels like giving birth to yourself.

It's painful. Sometimes it feels like it will never end. There's occasionally blood, often screaming, often tears. But at the end, you take that first deep breath and feel yourself filling with life, electricity rippling through you.

Y'know...

I never hated her. I only hated how she felt. She was beautiful. I loved her enough to see that she couldn't keep doing this. I loved her enough to recognize her suffering and release her. She created me; without her, I wouldn't exist.

Not many people get to say they were awake and present at their own conception.

We're lucky that way.

[aphelion-necrology]

Seven years apart and I'm still posing like this. . . . . . . .#ftmswithtattoos #ftm #trans #transandpierced #transandshirtless #transandinked #transgender #beforeandafter #transition #queerboy #queer #transman #me #elliottiguess #gayftm

[elliottiguess2-blog]

Coming out to my family, appointment for Testosterone, HERO, etc.

[elliottiguess2-blog]

#JustTransyThings

When you wear a full-length binder it feels like your pants are falling off. all. the. time.

[elliottiguess2-blog]

About coming out to my family

[elliottiguess2-blog]

Hey Mom, hey Dad, hey Chris,

I've been thinking for a long time about how to do all this - email seems so impersonal, but it's the best way for me to get all my thoughts in order.  I wish I could say all this in person.  It probably wouldn't be so well composed, but at least then I could see your reactions and answer your questions right away.  I'm still not sure how to say any of this, so I'll just get to it.  I joke a lot, but this is serious.

I am a transgender man.  

Not everyone knows about this, yet, but I wanted you to know before I announced it to everyone else.

I've been dealing with this for a long, long time.  Even longer than I've actually been actively conscious of it.  I can find references in journals from when I was a kid/teen about how I wasn't like other girls, how I actually thought I was more like a boy, jokingly calling myself  "a gay man trapped in a woman's body" and countless other things that were all hinting something to me through the years, but that I wasn't ready to confront head-on.  I had other, larger (at the time) problems that I had to work through, first.  A part of me wishes I had realized it sooner, but I know that I wasn't ready then.  Looking back, I can pinpoint a lot of my depression and my body-image issues did stem from my gender identity, but I didn't realize it at the time. I am currently in gender therapy to help me through this process, as it can get very confusing and hard to navigate at times.  I have been dressing exclusively as male for a while now and have asked those close to me to use male pronouns and refer to me by my chosen male name.  I also have a supportive network of friends that have been patient with me as I sort this out. Kean and I are still together and are trying to work through this, though it's difficult at times.  I've also been trying to get more active in community issues and have met a lot of good people at various events for racial and trans activism.  I'll be honest, it's actually all very scary, but with every baby step I take, I feel more and more like myself and know I'm headed in the right direction.

Realizing all of this and allowing myself to explore presentation which is more comfortable to me has helped me in enormous ways, and my depression and social anxiety have been improving steadily over time, the more I accept who I really am and show other people the identity I want.  The first day I dressed as a man I was immediately overcome by a feeling of relief.  People around me remarked about how much more comfortable I seemed, and how quickly I "settled" into it.  I know that this is not a complete cure for depression or for other issues in my life, but it has been improving my life overall.

This has nothing to do with Caitlyn Jenner or other trans people putting themselves into the public eye lately, though I am very happy that more people are becoming familiar with trans issues.  I knew this before Jenner came out, I knew this before Laverne Cox became famous.  This is not a phase.  This is not me trying to be cool or different.  This is not me being confused, it's actually me no longer being confused anymore.  This also has nothing to do with how I was raised or anything you did.  This is something that I was born with and is not anyone's "fault".

I am planning to begin medical transition eventually, starting with taking hormones probably sometime next year.  I am waiting to start because I want to take everything slowly in order to make the changes easier to handle for me and for those around me, and because of various money and social issues.

Please know that this was not easy to write, but that I love you all very, very much, and I hope that you can accept me and love me just as much.  This doesn't change who I was, my childhood, or the memories you have of me.  I'm the same person.  I'm just finally being honest with myself, and with others.  I understand if you need some time to process this or have questions, I will be here when you are ready.

Your eldest son/brother,

Elliott

[elliottiguess2-blog]

If you can’t handle me at my worst, then we are probably not compatible and should seek other partners

elliottiguess  (Probably the most important thing to remember about relationships.)