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Im so fucking tired right now. I feel like if I look away from my screen for a second im gonna pass out.
My friend told me something to day that hit me harder then it probably should have
(stop here if you don't want to know my feel bads)
i think the worst moments are these moments of painful lucidity and clarity after days of delusion. i feel stupid and empty and void because the truth is i am those things.
life and my psyche are doing such a number on me lately.
im thankful I at least have my boys to keep me somewhat rooted in actual reality.
but man am i fucking bummed the hell out right now at the reflection of actual true reality.
i see why i just spiral back in to it.
my brain and my body feel like a caged animal desperately longing for anything but the 4 walls of my prison
MS Realizations
I've had several people at work tell me that "i'm losing my shine". It's really starting to hurt. It's not like I'm trying to lose it and I'm just so exhausted to try to mask my pain. Do I have to try to mask all day? It's so tiring it hurts more.
I really wanna know how he feels about me out his own mouth so that I can get over him like this is sooo draining