⋆˚🗽꩜｡ the subway | rin itoshi wc 1.1k, angst/no comfort, ex!rin itoshi, messy breakup, one sided (rin is barely in this 😭)
i saw your green hair, beauty mark next your mouth. there on the subway, i nearly had a breakdown.
god, there he was. rin itoshi. your stupid, arrogant, green-haired ex boyfriend.
on public transportation? thought he was too good for that?
whatever. you were going to ignore him. wouldn't give him the satisfaction of seeing you. of knowing you still thought of him.
that you hadn't gotten over him. that you thought of him everyday.
that you were trying your best not to crash out on the fucking train right now.
that your eyes couldn't help but dart to his stupid fucking hair, the dark green locks your hands missed being curled in. that you wanted to stare into his stupid fucking teal eyes and blow away his stupid fucking long ass eyelashes off his face when they fell again.
no. he didnt deserve to know. that fucking asshole. god, you needed to calm down and get over it. you didnt need to breakdown over that asshole.
your gritted your teeth and looked down at your phone, mindlessly scrolling. fuck that guy.
a few weeks later, somebody wore your perfume. it almost killed me, i had to leave the room.
your friends had invited you out to a party. they knew you were still hung up on rin and wanted to try and help. some alcohol and some new faces could help, right?
wrong.
it was so loud, so packed. so many bodies, pressing against each other and bumping into you. the fluorescent lights didn't help the mood, they just annoyed you even more.
moving out of the mob, was hard enough, but then you had to scavenge and hunt for an empty seat, or anywhere to stand and be by yourself.
finally, you found an empty corner of the room and retreated to it immediately. standing there awkwardly, you watched all the people there. guys you had never seen, girls you didnt know. just a bunch of random people. you couldnt even see your friends.
thankfully, also no sign of rin. that would make your bad night horrible.
your head hit the wall as you sighed loudly, before a white haired guy with a green streak came up to you, obviously trying to flirt. you were mid eyeroll when you smelled it.
him.
what the fuck? was he here? no. he couldnt be.
he wouldnt be. rin would never come to something like this. hed rather be at home watching horror movies.
and of course, he wasnt here. this guy, whatever his name was, was the culprit. he was wearing rin's cologne. the one he always wore no matter what.
the one that clung to his hoodies and shirts. the ones you would steal and wear. the ones you would smell when you missed him.
like the shirt you had at your house. the one you hadnt washed in two months. the one that you didnt give back to rin, but you hadnt touched. the one in the corner of your room, just laying there.
ugh. you were gonna be sick. before bile could rise to your throat, you huffed and pushed the guy away. bumping into whoever and not caring, you finally made your way outside and breathed.
fuck this party. you texted your friends that you were leaving early and got an uber.
everywhere you fucking went. it was always rin.
its just another day, and its not over 'til its over. its never over. its just another day, and its not over 'til its over. its never over.
everywhere, everyday. it was nonstop. every fucking thing reminded you of him.
god, you were fucking hopeless. he wasnt even that good of a boyfriend! you practically had to beg for his attention.
so why the hell couldnt you move on? how did everything remind you of him, if he never did anything?
had rin become so ingrained in your life that a life without him just wasnt possible? when did that happen?
why? why did he become so important?
why did he leave? why werent you important too?
weeks had passed by now since the party. your friends were upset, but they could sympathize with you.
you didnt want them to though. you wanted them to slap you and call you stupid. help you realize you were better off without him.
but they wouldnt. they couldnt.
because maybe deep down, they knew too. knew rin had become a pillar in your life.
even if they didnt know why or how, they knew he was.
unfortunately, you did too.
you wished the fucking pillar would collapse and leave you alone.
'til i dont look for you on the staircase. or wish you thought that we were still soulmates.
you tried to stop yourself from thinking that every knock on your door was him. that every loud stomp on the stairs was him coming up. that every sigh from behind you was his.
you tried.
and you tried not to think about if he thought about you. if he was as torn up as you. if it hurt him to fall asleep without you.
if he cried deleting pictures on his phone. how quickly did he delete them? how quickly did he change his password to his phone? did he even change it?
or were you so miniscule in his life that those numbers meant nothing to him now. that he could keep his password as your birthday and not have a breakdown after unlocking it.
you couldnt.
you tried not to think about if he thought you were still soulmates. if he thought you were the love of his life still. if he thought you were still the most beautiful girl in the world.
did he? fuck.
because you still thought he was your soulmate. you still thought he was the love of your life, the guy you were gonna marry. the guy you would have kids with and grow old.
you still thought so. you didnt fucking want to, but you did.
it had been almost four months and you were still seeing him everywhere. still looking for him everywhere.
fuck!
how much longer would it be until you didnt? how much longer till you could go outside and not wish he was waiting for you?
how much longer till you didnt see his stupid green hair in your dreams? till his cologne didnt make you sick?
till he wasnt your ex? till he wasnt rin itoshi?
till he was just another guy on the subway?
but im still countin' down all of the days, 'til youre just another girl on the subway.
˚⋆𐙚｡authors note𖦹.ᡣ𐭩˚ — rinrin!!! the subway has been stuck in my head OH MY GOSHHHH so freaking good and i had no ideas sooo this came out 🙂↕️ blue lock angst is my strong suit i think 😝🙏 send requests pls i wanna write ☺️