Oh we’re spiraling today. Cool. Cool cool cool.
I just need to say this somewhere before I go be a productive member of society:
I feel like I’m actively mourning two of the fandoms that raised me. Like—built me. Shaped my brain chemistry at age ten. Taught me what longing is. What almost is. What could be if they just turned around is.
And now I’m sitting here watching them maybe… hard confirm ships?
And I’m not even mad in a pitchfork way. I’m just—
…quietly devastated in a “you just changed the physics of the universe I’ve been living in for 20+ years” kind of way.
Because the thing is—what made these ships special (to me) was never canon.
The “this could be something or it could be nothing and that’s what makes it hurt.”
It was the ability to build something that felt real inside the lines they gave us.
Like—compliant with canon but still ours.
And if the story suddenly goes “no actually THIS is the answer, this is the definitive endgame, close the door, lock it behind you”—
I’m not rewriting canon, I’m writing against it.
And I don’t know if my brain likes that. I don’t know if my heart likes that.
Like genuinely, embarrassingly sad.
Because I don’t want to lose the feeling of these characters belonging to possibility.
And also—while we’re here—
People can have more than one epic love in a lifetime.
I know. I KNOW. Nobody wants to hear that because we all want our ship to be The One™️.
But like… life is messy. Love is messy. Timing is messy.
You can have a love that changes you and a love that stays and a love that almost was and all of them can matter.
Ok. Ok. I’m good. I’m normal. I’m clocking in. I’m answering emails.
I’m a functioning adult with a job and not a woman grieving fictional slow burns on a Wednesday morning.