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lobcorp textposts
if you think you've seen these before, i dubbed them here on my tiktok!
hi again
part 1, part 2, part 3, part 4, part 5, part 6, part 7, part 8, part 9, part 10
me: you see the best thing about ciel in wonderland is, after watching it a few times, you begin to notice the obvious parallels with the current manga series. for example, in wonderland he is held in court where all of his friends accuse him of heinous actions against them. this holds true in the manga when, due to his impersonation of 'Ciel,' he betrays everyone he knows. It's interesting that they thought so far ahead that this works as a type of meta foreshadowing, a 'what could have been' if you will.
political prisoner the CIA has paid me to torture: okay fine I'll talk just please stop telling me about this
The only thing I am scared of is that one day i will finally find these orbs that fanfiction authors are writing about all the time
Mending Purple Together
The third and final story to the Hurting and Fixing the Broken Series. (Read it on ao3 here |x|).
Summary: The end of the war is finally drawing to a close but the wars that are fought inside us reach out farther than can be seen. Like the ocean, emotions and thoughts are endless. They're wild and free, ever-changing and free flowing among itself. Going deeper than can be imagined and surfacing to either calm or raging waters. In times of need, Lance was always drawn to the water. It was his home and where he belonged. It flowed through his veins and gave him life in a world that surrounded him in blue and red.
Start at the beginning:
Seeing Red |x| (ao3) or |x| blog post
Fixing Blue |x| (ao3) or |x| blog post
Series |x|
Emotions are of the sea. The sea is ever changing. It is never the same color twice. sometimes it's the deepest blue, the kind that you could look into for ages and get lost in how mesmerizing it is. Sometimes it's green and so clear you can practically see the bottom and you wish you could dive right in and absorb the beauty of it all. The sea never feels the same way either. It moves and flows, the life within it’s deep waters continuing on whether the surface is calm or the roughest state it will ever inhabit. See, the sea is strong and full of power at times, rough enough to allow all humanity from wanting to be near. It can be beautiful and calm, but it can also destroy or turn ugly as outward forces begin to reside within. However, there is one emotion that stands alone, away from the similarities the sea shares with human feelings.
The sea cannot love as humanity can.
-3 deca-pheobs later -
“Lance! To your right!”
Pidge’s voice cut through the trained focus he was holding on the soldiers below. Quickly he flipped his whole position, rotating around his rifle ready to shoot as he sees the flash of silver come down slicing clean through the robotic body of the glara warrior that was about to end him. He could see the sweat droplets running down the side of Keith’s face slicking the edge of his overgrown bangs to his forehead. There was a determination set deep within his body- being let out through his gaze and labored breathing- as he picked up the sword turned back towards the boy he just saved, winking and then moving on to the next victim of his impulsive actions. Lance turned back to his previous subject, tuning into that same determination his boyfriend was putting into his own efforts.
Allura told them that this could be it. The final battle to save the universe, making all of the work that the team has put into being members of voltron worthwhile. If they failed everything would be over. The universe would crumble at the hands of Lotor and team voltron would be executed. No fame. No glory. No seeing their family ever again.
It had been a long time since Lance had seen his family. Well it had been a long time for everyone but it hits him really hard. He only really allows his mind to wander into that whenever Keith is around. And in the middle of a huge battle that the fate of the universe is depending on apparently. If he keeps distracting himself then there will be no Keith or family left to think about. He inhale a deep breath and adjusted his aim.
Aim. Fire. Dead.
Aim. Fire. Dead.
Aim. Fire. Dead.
He was like a broken record. Playing the same track over and over again. Aim. Fire. Dead. He never missed a shot anymore. Not unless his arm was injured or he had taken a beating and even then the aim was slightly to the right, usually hitting somewhere where the subject would still be injured. Allura took the last soldier out with a couple of hits and the room was clear- for now.
-
The mission didn’t start out as the battle to end all battles. It originated as a rescue mission. A little over two years before during a fight with Zarkon Shiro went missing. It was rough for everybody- especially Keith- which meant it was rough for Lance in a different way.
The two of them had grown close over the months since Lance had broken his hand and admitted his love for him. They were essentially the others second half. They were in time with one another in a way that the rest of the team couldn’t be. Obviously nobody could replace the bonds that they already had formed with other members of the team, but with each other it was something new. Keith had started breaking due to his uncontrollable affiliation with the enemy and Lance was still fighting away his self doubt. And though neither could do much to actually repair the other, they were around and helped as much as they could. The were being fixed together.
Or so Lance thought.
When Shiro disappeared something changed. Lance was now the right hand of Voltron. The second in command. Keith’s second in command. Always right behind Keith. He began to see the red from his past. The same red that had transformed itself into a passionate determined love morphed back into the anger that got his arm broken before. It started to mess with his mind again. But he couldn’t let it. So he gave up Blue and he gave up his pride and followed the direction that Keith wanted to go. The only person that Keith would listen to was Lance but beyond battles their interactions became limited. Keith didn’t want to talk, all he wanted to do was find Shiro. That is what everyone wanted, but no one wanted it like Keith did.
The thoughts started to absorb into his skin. Flooding and surrounding until nothing else was there. Lance couldn’t go back though. Not again. Not again. Blue wouldn’t open up to him anymore and Red wouldn’t listen like Blue ever did. She wasn’t truly his so why would she. So he went to the only place he could think of even if he was unwanted- Keith.
He had already started giving up on anything more than a friendship between him and Keith. It had been months and they grew close but nothing more and now with Keith shutting himself off so bad, all hope was gone. Showing up at Keith’s door was difficult especially knowing that what he was about to say was a sad truth that they couldn’t avoid. He was voltrons weakest link and he would be the one to go when Shiro returned. And Keith would agree.
Keith didn’t agree. In fact it was the opposite, but beyond slight teasing on his part with “Leave the math to Pidge” nothing much more was said. And then it backfired. Keith eventually left the team when Shiro returned. He would come in and out for a while but a few months passed and he stopped showing up completely to join the Blade of Marmora leaving Shiro as the black paladin and Lance has a permanent replacement. There was hardly a goodbye between them. Lance became mad but he wouldn’t allow himself to slip back into where he was again. No more breaking hands on walls because the boy you love left you and your team when you were convinced he cared. He trained. He participated in the campaigns. He trained some more. Sometimes he would stand outside of Keith’s room as if he was there. He would talk to Red about him sometimes, never anyone else. And sometimes he would even go into Blue’s hanger and attempt to make conversation with the lion but there was never the pull in the back of his mind as a response. But he would never go back to being how bad he was.
The day that Keith returned was a rough one for everybody. The team was being tracked by Lotor somehow and had been fighting battles almost on the daily. They were in the middle of a battle when the Blade figured out that the Shiro that had been with them was never real. Just a synthetic clone made to look like him and given his memories. To be fair, the clone never knew he was a clone until he started getting controlled. It hit the team where it hurt and after the barely won battle the team remained Shiroless once again and were in need of yet another black paladin. The reunion was rocky and turned sour quickly. Lance guessed that Allura had contacted the blade calling for Keith to return, but no one else had been expecting what happened. Months had gone by with no sign or attempt at contact from Keith and then one day while they were in the middle of a meeting the doors opened behind him and there he was, still in his Marmora armor, walking in as if he was just in his room and was arriving late. His hair had grown long enough to go past his shoulders and his face looked dark and sad. He had a scar that went from the middle of his chin just under his bottom lip and stretched down his jaw and onto the side of his neck. It was red and relatively fresh, as if it had just finished healing.
Everyone was silent for a moment as he made his way forward across the room. Lance heard Allura start to speak, then he started moving. He was angry. Relieved. Sad. Overjoyed. Keith always had a way of making him feel everything at once.
He saw a smile starting to form on Keith's face as he got closer. The scar seemed to stretch making the smile look different. They met in the middle with a shove of Lance’s hands on Keith’s chest. Hard and angry. No warmth in that greeting.
“Lance what the…”
“You think that you can just leave us- leave me- for months with no contact and then as soon as you get word that he is gone just walk in here with no warning. No form of preparation. You’re obviously not okay and you just… you just…” He couldn’t take it anymore. He was sure that everyone was in shock by his actions but he didn’t care. He moved forward again and Keith held up his hands as if he was expecting to be shoved again but rather Lance wrapped his arms around him as if he was never going to let go. “I was so worried. Why…”
“I missed you too Lance. We can talk later.”
Lance held on for a little bit longer until it finally caught up to him that there was an entire universe that needed the attention he was giving to Keith. They couldn’t afford anymore time right now. The team had their black paladin back and they had a mission to plan out.
Time went by. They trained. They fought. They survived. And then one day it went quiet. Lotor had to be planning something big for them. They waited around the castle for a few days, training constantly. Eventually they began advertising for the coalition once again. The movement was growing in their favor and it seemed as if Lotor was letting it happen. Between their team exercises and the recruitment they had downtime to themselves in the castle. Somewhere in there Lance and Keith became close once again. They trained together almost every night when neither of them could sleep because they were so worried about the possibility of the impending attacks. And when they were finished Lance would go back to Keith’s room to sleep. The only time he was in his room anymore was to change his clothes. And on nights when it was really hard for either of them they would go type in the coordinates of earth in the control room and sit in silence as they started at the reason for it all. It no longer mattered if they came out of the fight alive or not. As long as they could save the universe from falling into the Galra’s control, everything would all be worth it.
Which is why when they got information that Shiro, the real Shiro that started this crazy journey with them, was still alive the desire that they all had to go save him became such a risky mission. Allura didn’t want to risk the team to go save one person no matter who that person was. It took weeks of planning to organize an attack that Allura would agree to. The perfect rescue mission that would allow them to get the real Shiro back and make everything return to how it should be.
This of course worried Lance. Him and Keith were finally together. They were happy- well as happy as they could get with the fate of the universe resting on top of their shoulders. But would Keith step aside again if need be? Was their plan too risky? Lance had his doubts, and though he has started speaking up more when he was skeptical and forces himself to be listened to, he stayed quiet. He knew he was being selfish.
Allura told them to all get some rest before they were to set out. Lance knew him and Keith weren’t going to get any sleep, not when they had a battle ahead of them that could quite literally make or break everything that they had spent years working towards. They had spent the last few years of their teenage lives fighting an intergalactic war that was going to be put in slight jeopardy within the next few hours. They just laid there in Keith’s bed- holding each other close. Lance’s head was on Keith’s chest and even though he couldn’t see his face he knew he was as wide awake as him.
“Promise you won’t leave again.”
“Why would…”
“When we get Shiro back, promise me you won’t leave again like last time.”
“I promise.”
Lance couldn’t tell if he was lying in that moment or not. But it didn't matter because right then and there they were together and the world was okay.
It didn’t remain that way for much longer however. The castle alarms began to go off and instantly Lance and Keith were up and putting their armor on. Something wasn’t right. The alarms weren’t supposed to go off. They should still have time left. Lance and Keith broke off without a word running towards their individual hangers.
“Allura what is going on?” Lance heard Hunk’s voice over the comm system. He sounded exhausted but it was easy to tell that he was becoming anxious extremely fast. He was as scared as Lance was.
“Lotor must know about our plan to rescue Shiro. He has probably been anticipating this for awhile now. A fleet of his is making their way towards our position. If we move now we may be able to stop them, I already have Coran contacting members of the coalition. I’m afraid this rescue mission just became a full scale battle. The biggest one we have seen in a while.”
“Will we still be able to save Shiro?” Keith’s voice sounded calm over the speakers. His voice was deeper and less aggressive than it had been so many years before. He wasn’t going to let his personal connection with Shiro get in the way of the mission.
“I believe that we can if we play our odds right. However I'm afraid that will be a difficult task. Lotor doesn’t seem to be playing games anymore. He is ready for a fight. To have control over what he wants. This may very well be our final battle in this war, but if we succeed then I believe that Shiro’s rescue can be achieved.”
-
“Pidge get the doors!” Keith’s voice rang through the speaker. The urgency in his voice covering up the determination that had been displayed earlier. Where Lance was a broken record in battle, Keith was a grenade. He was powerful and explosive, you pull the latch and you set him off. Despite how sharp and mature he had grown over the years, he was still unpredictable and his impulsiveness still edged its way through. But none of that was present now. Lance could just hear it in his voice how nervous he was getting. The soldiers in the room were all taken out for now but they had invaded a ship to save their friend after already taking out many. All of them were exhausted and Keith wasn’t just worrying about their success but it was all becoming real to him that somewhere close by they would be finding Shiro- hopefully in one piece. If Shiro was truly located somewhere near, the lack of guards would not be something that will become familiar.
Pidge opened the doors from her location. It worried Lance that she was off by herself in the control room alone, but he also knew that if they were going to maneuver their way through the ship and find Shiro that was the best way to do it. Pidge could handle herself, especially since she essentially had full control over every door in the place. The other four paladins started off down the hallway ahead.
“Okay guys, when you get up towards the end this hallway splits up into two directions. I’m sure they moved Shiro’s location once they realized that we were coming for him. He could be anywhere at this point so you’ll probably have to split up.”
“Hunk you go with Allura and I’ll take Lance. Search every room you can. Pidge let us know if we are coming up on any trouble or if the other group needs more than two people.” Hunk and Allura nodded and went to the left as Keith and Lance made their way down the right side.
The hallway was long and relatively empty, not many doors. The ones that they did see led to abandoned rooms. The guards must have changed position as well and they obviously figured out how to cover their location because Pidge was having trouble finding them too. They opened a door that appeared to be an elevator type thing so they got on and took it down to wherever it lead.
“Any sign of them Pidge?”
“Actually I don’t have sign of almost anything. Where did you and Lance go? All that I have on screen is Hunk and Allura.”
“We got on an elevator and it’s taking it down. Do you have control over anything in the bottom areas of the ship?”
“I’m not sure. I can try and access them but they are doing something to block me out.”
“Hunk and I will be on our way over there. That must be where all of the soldiers went.”
“No, you guys keep searching where you are. Lance and I can handle it and you might find something useful over there. Pidge do you have any idea how Coran and Matt are doing with the rest of the coalition on holding off Lotor’s forces?”
“They seem to have it covered as of right now, but I would hurry in case they need Voltron soon.”
They began to slow down and both him and Keith held up their weapons ready to attack. The doors opened to reveal three soldiers waiting and ready. Keith lunged for one as Lance picked off the other two with his pistols. Those were the only three that they could see right now but the hallway was lined with doors that could potentially hold several more. Lance changed his bayard into a gun more suitable for their situation. Keith used his hand to open the first door, holding his sword up as if expecting someone to jump out. It was empty. As well as the next five. The hallway broke off into two parts again at the end.
“Pidge any sight of us yet?”
“Not yet.”
“We aren’t splitting up Keith.”
“We need to cover more ground.”
“If we get into a mess with a lot of soldiers, neither of us can hold off alone. We make a good team. I’m not letting you go alone.”
“Fine, we’ll go left first.”
They opened a few more doors and still nothing.
“Hunk, do you guys have anything yet?”
“We found a few prisoners but not much else.”
Keith opened the next door and the first thing out of it was a shot from one of the enemy's guns. It missed both of them and they lunged forward into the fight. There were quite a few soldiers in the room but not too many that they couldn’t handle it. Lance’s gun was able to get just enough that Keith could get the rest. At some point he took out his marmora blade and used both swords to fight off the oncoming targets. The room cleared and Keith opened the door that was on the opposite side. A few more soldiers came through, but again they were able to handle it. The next door led to another hallway. The ship was big, but if they were starting to run into more guards then they must be getting closer to something. In this hallway they found a few more prisoners to add to Hunk and Allura’s count but other than that nothing more than another elevator. It was a risk going down but they came here on a rescue mission and they needed to complete it.
Keith was noticeable nervous now, but only in his movements. His face was stone cold- determination setting back in.
“We are going to find him.” Lance said. He didn’t know why. Truth be told, they don’t know if there will even be any Shiro left to find. Or if there will end up being any one to find him if they run into too many guards.
The doors opened again and Lance immediately began firing off. Picking off four soldiers off the bat. Keith ran ahead cutting the heads off of two and once and then turning around to stab one through the abdomen. They had to be getting close. More and more guards were flooding into the room but Keith and him continued to push through. They were an unstoppable team together. All of the training and time they had put into perfecting their skills was shining through in their performance.
Keith opened a door and there were two guards waiting. Lance shot one but the other but Keith had to fight more with the other. Lance ducked on in. The room was wide. There were cage like areas built into the wall with several prisoners held in each one as if they were animals in a zoo. There were tables spread out across the room and structures that appeared to be similar to cryopods along the walls. Some of them were filled, others were empty. The room appeared to be some sort of hospital wing but it was probably used for some form of torture of experimentation instead of healing. Beyond the prisoners and Keith and Lance the room remained empty. They managed to free the prisoners and warned them about the possibilities that they may face if they run into any galra soldiers. One of the prisoners told them that the other prisoners were being held in the hallway beyond the door. When they parted ways, Keith opened the door and sure enough it looked like they had entered a prison. There were doors lining the walls that had singular windows looking into them. Lance and Keith went along looking for a way to open all of the doors. They had to open each individually. The first couple held two or three prisoners. The next one was empty. The next one Keith opened looked empty at first, but then Lance noticed there was a body curled up in the corner.
“Shiro!”
He remained curled up staring at the wall. Not responding to Keith’s voice at all.
“Keith I’ve got him, go open up the other cells.” He looked at Lance in response, the look of fear briefly showing through the hard exterior before disappearing as he nodded and took off. Lance slowly inched his way over to the man in the corner. He reached his hand out ready to touch the shoulder of the man that Lance used to idolize. Before he could get to him, the man turned and jumped up quickly, surprising Lance as he lunged forward wrapping his hands around his throat.
“Sh-Shiro! It’s- me… Lan- Lance. We’re here- to res…”
Shiro’s face looked wrong. His scar across his nose had been extended to go completely across his face and was also accompanied by another that traveled from his temple to his cheek. He had a black eye and a beard that was very gray despite him only being in his late 20’s. His hair was down to his shoulders and There was more white spread throughout now rather than gathered in the tuft at the front. His eyes were bloodshot and his hands and face were dirty. He was wearing the same clothes that all of the other prisoners were wearing- a torn purple shirt and loose fitting ripped shorts. If Lance didn’t know who he was, he would have been scared for his life- but something told him that maybe he should be anyway.
“No! You’re fake. You are always fake just like the rest of them! Voltron was defeated years ago, no one is coming to rescue me! You’re not real!”
“Shiro… pl- please… I’m real… I’m really- Lance…” It was getting harder to talk and even more so to gasp for air. Shiro was going to kill him.
“Shiro, let him go!” Keith made his way into the room. Shiro’s focus moved to look at the other paladin but his grip didn’t loosen around Lance’s neck.
“Why are there two of you! There is only ever one simulation! What are you trying to do to me!” He turned his gaze back to Lance, the look in his eyes got crazier.
“Shiro! Let him go, it’s really me! It’s really Keith! Look at my face, I have a scar. The Keith you know doesn’t have one!”
Shiro looked up and took a good look at Keith’s face. At the scar that was painfully noticeable across the bottom of his face. Shiro’s eyes softened and looked back between him and Lance and he let go. Lance immediately retreated to join Keith’s side.
“But… that’s impossible. You are all dead… Voltron lost… I. You must be fake.” Anger filled his eyes again and he started to charge forward. Keith also ran forward and elbowed him in the side of the head, knocking Shrio out.
“I’m sorry Shiro, it’s for your own good.”
“How are we supposed to get him back out? What if we run into more guards?”
“We’ll just have to carry him and work that out when we get there. But we need to move now. Pide, Allura, Hunk, we have Shiro and we are on our way back up. Free as many more prisoners as you can and then get back to where we came in. We need to get him to a pod as fast as possible and then we have a fight to get back to. “
They made their way back through doors and down hallways. The elevator doors that they needed opened before they got there and out poured soldiers. Keith dropped Shiro on the ground behind him and ran forward into action. They picked their way through the crowd and got Shiro and loaded into the elevator. When they got to their destination, more guards crowded towards them. Lance stayed back in the space they had occupied picking them off at a distance as Keith fought his way forward. Lance held up is gun to shoot again as he felt the push of a swing and his gun flew out of his hand and hit the wall. He fell backwards, helmet hitting the ground below him hard. His vision blurred for a moment before he saw a soldier coming towards him. He reached over and grabbed his gun holding it up to aim. Before he could get his vision back enough to shoot though the soldier was on top of him trying to get his knife past Lance’s gun that he was not using as a shield.
“Keith!” He cried out for help from the other paladin but he doesn’t think that he heard him. He turned his focus back to the guard that was fighting on top of him and pushed as hard as he could with his gun. He could hear Keith’s swords cutting through the crowd. It amazed Lance the power that his boyfriend had in battle. Meanwhile he was struggling to fight off one person. He never excelled at upclose hand to hand battle, but Keith had taught him quite a few things in their training.
The soldier managed to knock his gun to the side and he put his knife up to Lance’s helmet. He hit the glass covering his face, cracking the material.
“You really thought you could win against the Galra empire. You pathetic humans actually believed that your precious Voltron would stand a chance against the emperor” the soldier began as he hit the glass again making Lance wince. It shattered with the next hit getting all over Lance’s face. He could feel some of the shards cutting into his cheek. His face was exposed. “I wonder what it will feel like to kill a member of the great Voltron.” He put his knife up to his face next to his eyebrow. “Just how do I want to do it is the question.”
The tip of the knife pushed its way ever so slightly into his skin. He felt the blood began to rush from the area down his face. A scream erupted from his throat as the searing pain tore through his skull. The knife began to move downward cutting past his eyebrow, directly down. Lance couldn’t move. The only thing he could do was scream in horror and pain as the knife moved slowly down his face. Just as the knife was reaching his mouth, the movement suddenly stopped, the soldier falling over to the side dead. Lance’s hands came up to hold his face. The screams still tearing out of him.
“Lance! Oh my god we have to go now! You need to get to a pod immediately!”
Lance knew he had to get up, but the pain was unbearable.
“Hunk get here…”
The world went black before he heard the rest of the sentence.
-
“Lance… Lance… Come back to us. We miss you.”
Brightness flooded his eyes as they shot open. He opened his mouth and coughed up something that he didn’t want to think about and began taking deep breaths as if he hadn’t breathed in oxygen in years. As the brightness of the world began to dim, he slowly sat himself up and squinted at the sight in front of him. An empty beach with pure white sand and water blue and clear expanding for miles out into the edge of the earth. Varadero. He was home.
Joy filled his body, healing him from whatever state he had just woken up from. Lance pulled himself up from his resting place in the sand and ran towards the water he had waited for years to finally see again. He didn’t know how he got there or what happened to him he just knew that he had not been this happy in a while.
It was a perfect day outside, he was surprised he was the only person on the beach. The sky was clear and the sun was out but there he was, lonesome in the best place on the planet Earth. He ran into the water fully clothed and splashed around as if he were a child once again. He scooped the clear ocean into his hands and poured it on top of his head causing his hair to glue itself to his forehead. It was real. It felt so real.
He felt a nudge in his stomach- as if his body was pulling him. He followed as if on an invisible leash and turned to face the deserted sand again. The shops and buildings lined the background beyond the sand- as empty as the beach was. Lance began to walk out of the water and as he neared the shore he noticed that he was in fact not alone. There was a person- they looked short from the distance- but it was a man. He had medium length black hair from what Lance could see and was carrying an item of clothing in each hand. Lance walked onto the damp sand and drew closer to the man in front of him.
“Keith? Is that you?”
The man just smiled and turned around and began to walk. Lance followed closely behind curiously following the strange pull that was still present in his body that was now spreading to his limbs.
The man- Keith apparently- led him to one of the houses that resided close to the beach’s edge. It was relatively small compared to some of the others that stood ground along the beach. Elevated from the ground and yellow in color the memories of the house flooded back into Lance’s mind. It was their house. His family’s. The one that they stayed in when they visited the beach. He watched as Keith climbed the stairs and then stood on the balcony- waiting. Lance followed shortly, wondering what exactly was going on. He made it to the top and looked out at the view that Keith was looking at.
“I’ve been wanting to bring you here since I met you at the garrison.” Keith just turned and smiled at him. Lance just wanted to kiss him but he felt like he couldn’t for some reason.
“It’s almost over Lance. You need to wake up now.”
“Wake up? I just woke up on the beach about 20 minutes ago.”
Keith held up the two items of clothing that resided in his hand. One was his jacket, the one he wore all of the time in the early years of being apart of Voltron. It was his older brothers from forever ago. It was dirty and green and completely outdated but it was his favorite piece of clothing he owned. It reminded him of home when he needed it the most. The other was his helmet from his paladin armor. The original blue that he knew he truly was deep down despite being the red paladin for so many years now. It was scratched from the hardships he had faced in his past. The universe had been saved in that helmet- obviously, or else he wouldn’t be in the place he was.
“Why do you have those Keith?”
“You have a choice to make. I’m not going to tell you which one to choose, but we need you Lance.”
“What do you mean? We saved the universe, that’s why we are here.”
“You have to choose Lance. It’s time to wake up.”
Lanced looked between the two items. There was obviously something wrong. Keith’s voice sounded calm and soothing but it was beginning to worry Lance. His old jacket or his helmet. What did Keith mean it’s time to wake up? He continued to glance between the two and reached his hand out to touch the damaged piece of armor.
Pain shot through his head as soon as his hand touched the cool piece of armor. He covered the area over his right eye. It felt as if someone was taking a knife to his face. His whole body crumpled onto the wooden floor of the deck at Keith’s feet. He glanced up, looking at the man in front of him with his one good eye.
“Keith! What’s happening to me?”
“You’re waking up Lance. It’ll all be okay. Wake up now, we need you.”
The air around him began to grow really cold, making the hair on his arms and legs stand up from being not only wet, but also exposed in his shorts and tshirt. He looked out at the beach beyond. Everything looked so calm out there. In the distance he could see a ground of people all crowded around each other. His family.
“No, wait! I have to go see them!”
They all waved towards him, they could see him and he was about to “wake up” apparently.
“Keith please! I have to see them! I can’t leave them again!”
Lance tried to stand up but his legs felt weak. The pain in his eye was beginning to get worse. The world began to get brighter again but his vision was starting to blur and get darker around the edges.
“Please… Keith.”
The world around him faded to black.
-
The cold was chilling to the bone. It got underneath his skin and made its way through his body as he woke up. The next sensation was the brightness. It seemed familiar but this one took longer to go away. The world came slowly into focus and then he began to fall forward. He felt arms wrap around his stomach supporting his weight, keeping him from falling into the ground. He looked up at the face of the person who caught him- it was Hunk.
Hunk looked the same as he always had but over the years Lance hadn’t realized how much his best friend had really matured. His face had slimmed up from all of the training they do but he was still large in build. He looked older and less anxious about everything around him- rather he almost appeared calm except the more he looked at Lance’s face the more Lance noticed the worry begin to flood his eyes. His hair was longer now but he was still wearing his bandana that he loved and he had a beard. Lance doesn’t remember a lot but he was glad to see a familiar face- especially that of his best friend. The only thing that seemed off was that the world seemed closed off on his right side.
“How are you feeling Lance?”
“Well I’m freezing cold and am having to lean on you for support. So basically like every trip to cryopods. But something is wrong with my eyes, I can’t see out of my right one. Did something happen to my vision? Should I go back into the pod?”
“About that…”
The doors to the room opened and the rest of his team plus Matt flooded into the opening being led by Allura and Keith. Keith set his focus on Lance and walked straight forward, closing the distance when he finally made it to him with his mouth. Keith’s hands were on the sides of Lance’s face, keeping him close as he kissed him. When they finally separated, Keith's arms moved to his waist where he pulled him in for a hug and buried his head into Lance’s neck.
“You don’t ever worry me like that ever again. I thought we lost you.”
Despite them being in a relationship for quite a while now, there was hardly ever any public affection between them beyond holding hands and the occasional hug or kiss and even then they were initiated by Lance. It was just never Keith’s thing so it shocked Lance that he was being so open in front of the whole team. The rest of the people crowded around them as Keith let go of his waist but wrapped his arm around his shoulders as if to hold him up even though Lance was sure he would be fine by now.
“How are you feeling Lance?” Allura asked him. She looked a little worried, in fact all of them did. They were all staring at his face as if he had grown a third eye or something.
“Feeling almost as great as I look, Princess.” He smiled at her and gave her his signature wink. It was habit of his to “flirt” with her now after he had to spend any amount of time in a pod. He could hear the sighs travel around and could almost feel Keith roll his eyes in response.
“Yep, he’s fine.” Pidge said.
“No but seriously, how are you feeling Lance?”
“Well my body feels fine, but my vision is wrong. I can’t see out of my right eye. Do I need to go back into the pod for a little bit longer maybe? I might have come out too early.”
“Lance…” He watched as the faces of his teammates dropped to look at his feet instead of his face. “You can’t see out of your right eye because you no longer have a right eye…”
Lance just stared at Allura in shock. That couldn’t be right. He had to have his right eye. This has to be a mistake, that is the eye he uses to shoot and he can’t have lost it.
Shatter, pain, blood, black.
“No…” He held his hand up to his face. He could feel a line on his face that went straight down, almost to his lips, and sure enough it went straight across his closed eyelid that was missing the bump that would be normally remain there. He turned around to look at himself in the glass of the pod. His face was covered in small scars, but that he was used to- he just had a few more that have been added to his collection he got over the years of fighting. But now there was a red mark that traveled the length of his face, making his complection look dark and unrecognizable.
“We’re so sorry Lance, but not even a cryopod could fix what had happened to your eye. We did everything that we could with the limited amount of resources and time we had.” Allura’s voice sounded calm yet sad. He believed her though, he knew the risks of joining a war and now he was looking at the effects of them literally in the face using his reflection. He put on a smile and turned around to face the group.
“So Keith, do I look hotter with a scar across my face?”
Everyone rolled there eyes in response and Keith gave him a smile even though he could tell what Lance was doing. Hiding his pain within his jokes for the sake of everyone else. Always for the betterment of the team.
“Hunk, how is Shiro doing?” Matt chimed in. Lance turned and noticed that another pod was being used, occupied by shiro himself. He looked frail and still a little sickly but Lance knew the power that was hidden behind that look. He had experienced it first hand on the mission.
“He seems like he is healing well, but I think he will have to spend another quintant or so.”
“He will need some close supervision when he wakes up. Poor guy has a lot of catching up to do,” Pidge commented.
“Right. Well he is not the only one. I believe we have another member of the team that needs a run through of our most recent events.” Allura said as she turned and began to walk towards the door. “Lance, go freshen up and we’ll have a meeting in the control room in 30 doboshes.”
Lance took one last look at their former leader and turned back to Keith. Keith- still holding onto his arm- began to walk forward with him. They made their way back to Lance’s room to get a change of clothes so that he wouldn’t be stuck in the skin tight suit he had been wearing in the sleep pod. Over the years they had collected clothes and garments from the different planets they visited as well as buying a few from a few “Earth stores” in space malls and borrowing random clothing items from around the castle. But despite having all of this to choose from, he went with his old blue and white baseball shirt that had a couple of holes in the front from wearing too much. He was a little surprised it still fit him after so long but it had always been a little big and he didn’t think that his size had changed all that much. Instead of jeans he opted for his blue pajama pants. It was a recap meeting and he just got out of cryosleep- he was going to wear his pajamas.
“You’ll be okay won’t you?” Lance could hear the hesitation in Keith’s voice. He sounded scared of the words as if he was anticipating a bad response from them. Which he had the right to, Lance did in fact just lose his eye along with becoming the owner of a rather impressive scar.
“Yeah. I think I will be. I hope.” He looked up into the mirror that was on the wall of his room. Like with Hunk, Lance had never really paid attention to the changes that edged their way into his complexion over the years. Keith’s were extremely noticeable when he first came back- there was no way of missing the changes that took place over the time he was away from the team. It was the same with Shiro as well. Both people had obviously grown and their expressions had flipped from where they were when they first began this mission so long ago. But Lance- Lance had a hard time seeing much change in himself. When they arrived years ago at the castle- all Lance was able to see was a cargo pilot who got lucky. The second place winner- always one step behind the star pupil who had once again joined him. Never original. Never really needed. Just there. Now when he looked at himself he saw age. Lance never pictured himself to be the grown up type but he could see it in his own eyes the toll that war has taken on him but also hope- something that wasn’t present in the beginning. He was himself. Confident and genuine in his looks. He was roughed up but he had lost the selfish conceitedness that followed him around when he was 17 and now recognized his looks and how they remained despite the closed gash down his face.
He turned to look at Keith remembering how long it took him to get to the point that he is at now. He didn’t do it alone but he also would not be where he was now if he had attempted to take care of the situation himself.
“You know, I think that is the exact spot you were standing when you came into my room to apologize for making me break my hand,” Lance teased.
“If I remember correctly you broke your own hand because you were so head over heels in love with me that you couldn’t handle it.”
“Nope. I don’t remember it happening that way. Didn’t happen.”
Keith smiled in response but didn’t continue with the banter. He simply walked over to Lance’s door and opened it for the two of them to walk through. They made their way down to the control room where the rest of the team were waiting in their respective chairs minus Allura who was accompanied by Matt and Coran in the middle of the room.
“Ah Lance, Keith, please have a seat.” She pulled up the star map of the universe and suddenly they were all among the stars as if they were floating around in space right now. This was always Lance’s favorite part of this room. He liked the feeling of being surrounded by the stars. “This is the universe as we knew it when the four of you paladins first joined me and Coran about 5 deca-phebes ago.” She hit a button and the stars changed. Suddenly many of them were purple or red, with only a few lit up yellow. Lance knew what this was- it was the galra empire. They had seen this map on multiple occasions for planning but he doesn't remember the empire being so big when he first started.
“The purple is what was under full galra control, the red is completely destroyed planets and the yellow were all of the free planets remaining at the time,” Coran explained. All of them already knew this information though- it might have been the first time ever any of them were able to catch on to what he was talking about.
“And this is the galra empire as of right now.” Allura pressed another button and the entirety of what they were seeing changed. A few more red planets popped up but the purple planets significantly went down being replaced by yellow ones.
“Because of you and your work with Voltron- along with the help of the blade of marmora, Matt and the rebels and of course the rest of the coalition- we have managed to almost completely take out the galra empire. Prince Lotor is dead and the empire has begun to dismantle itself. There are only a few planets left that will just need some slight convincing and then we are looking at a universe free of the galra rule.”
“Woah woah woah woah… hold on there princess. Lotor is dead? How long was I in the pod for?”
“Just a couple of quintants. The battle that put you into that pod ended not much later on after that.”
“But how? You guys couldn’t even form Voltron! And not only that but you had two dying people to get out of the galra ship and into the castle.”
“We put you and Shiro into the red lion with some of the refugees from the ship and put in the castles coordinates. You guys went straight there but when Coran came and got you, you had lost a lot of blood. It worried all of us,” Pidge chimed in.
“It was insane dude. After Red left, we all boarded our lions and we’re coming up with a plan and Keith was all like ‘follow me’ and just straight up flew to where Lotors ship was. Pidge of course took care of the one we were on before we left it. But it was crazy, we took out so many enemy ships with just the four of us but Keith was on fire out there,” Hunk looked excited as he gave the details behind their victory not realizing how bad it made Lance feel that he wasn’t there to help fight.
“Wow you guys, so it’s really over? We get to go home now?”
“Well it’s not quite over. There are still a few small planets that are invaded by galra forces but those will be dismantled easily. You four, and hopefully Shiro when he is ready, are set to attend a few peace meetings in different galaxies. But once we finish those last few items of business, yes, you all will get to return to your home.”
She spoke as if the whole time they were here they were just some sort of intergalactic imbassadors arguing with other leaders over business matters. As if the last few years of their childhood hadn’t been taken away from them as they were swept up into a war that hardly concerned them when they joined. It almost didn’t seem real. If he wasn’t standing in an actual alien spaceship castle floating through the universe to a planet galaxies away from his home on earth, the whole thing seemed as if it could just be a fever dream. Some sort of hallucination that his mind had created to cover up something going on in his mind. Maybe he hadn’t actually been a pilot. Maybe he hadn’t fallen in love. Maybe he hadn’t been on the crazy dangerous adventure of a lifetime. Maybe it was all fake.
Keith must have noticed his soiraling because as soon as he felt the cool touch of Keith’s hand as it slipped into his own, he returned to reality. It was real. This was real.
“So princess, where to first?”
-
It was night time in the New Mexico desert that they had left years before after they entered back into Earth’s atmosphere.
They had said their goodbyes to Coran and the lions back in the castle when they finally completed their last mission and returned to planet Arus where the journey had begun. The five original paladins plus one princess and brother loaded into the blue lion as they had done so many years ago. They were finally going home. Lance had offered to fly since this would be the first time having been in Blue since the switch, but Allura had to take on the position seeing as Lance was still adjusting to having monocular vision. Losing an eye had impeded on his ability to perform certain tasks. He could still fly a lion but if something was in his blind spot he couldn’t see it in time to move out of the way. His aim was off a lot of the time when he shot now too. He had been right eye dominant when he used his bayard and though he was still really good with his left, it wasn’t the same. Not only that but it messed with his depth perception and so everyone decided it was better just to have Allura pilot them all back to Earth.
It was the most people that had ever been inside a lion at one time, the next most being the five of them when they arrived at the Castle of Lions. It was a tight squeeze but luckily they knew the ride wouldn’t be very long. In a matter of minutes they would be back on Earth. Home.
Lance let his mind wander to the possibilities of how much the planet could have changed. They didn’t even know exactly what year they would be returning to, even though they could take a pretty good guess. The world continued spinning without them and had no idea that because of them it was able to do so. He wondered if his family would recognize him. He wondered if Keith would come with him when he went home or if he would stay at his shack. Would they all be admitted back into the garrison? Would their story get out and they be world heros? Or would the only people on the planet to ever know about their mysterious disappearance be their families in the five of them? Would they even speak to each other in the years to follow, or would they all just remain apart of each others secret war driven past? Lance had looked forward to coming home and seeing his family again since they arrived, but now that he was leaving he realized that there was a possibility of him leaving his new family behind. He didn’t want to believe that that was even in the question.
The ride back to earth was silent. Moments later they felt the feet of Blue land on the hard desert ground.
“Now, be careful when you exit the lion. Coran said that the air here might make you sick from the smell and that you might be a little disoriented while trying to walk. It shouldn’t be bad on you guys since you have been in areas with gravity almost this whole time and exited and reentered other planets atmospheres perfectly fine.” She stared out at them sadly for a moment. “I don’t know how I could ever fully express how grateful I am that all of you- even if by mistake- found my castle. Without you the universe would have been taken over and the lives of uncountable innocent lives would have been taken. Our time together was long and rough and though I’m sad to see you go, you all have earned your freedom. I can only hope that the universe remains at peace, but I also hope that this won’t be our final goodbye. There couldn’t have been more brave and selfless people to become the paladins of Voltron.” They could all see her begin to tear up.
Shiro was the first person to go up to her, he took her hand in his and kissed it. “It was an honor to serve you princess- even though my service was of short time.” Her arms wrapped around him, holding him close.
“Oh I can’t take this anymore- group hug!” Hunk cried out while pulling every one in front of him towards Shiro and Allura to join their hug.
This really was the end of their adventure.
Allura opened up Blue to allow them go leave after they all said their goodbyes. They exited the lion for, as far as they knew, the last time ever. Lance put his hand on the cold blue metal after the entrance closed.
“Goodbye Blue. We had a good run.” He felt the dull hum in the back of his mind as if she was purring in response. They stepped back away from the robotic lion and watched as Allura powered her on and flew off into the night sky back out into the universe.
“Well now what?” Hunk asked the group.
“She dropped us off at the same place where we found the lion in the first place so we shouldn’t be all that far from my house.”
“You mean that wooden shack?” Pidge questioned. She was right, it wasn’t much of a house more than it was a shed like thing.
“Yes, Pidge. The wooden shack.”
They began making their way back towards the general direction where they believed the house would be. None of them actually thought out a plan for what their next steps would be once they made it back to Earth. Probably because it didn’t seem like reality to any of them yet. They were here. They may be lost, a little rough around the edges, and slightly queasy from the smell of the air, but they were all home and everything was okay now.
After what seemed like forever of walking around, Keith finally began to recognize some things around the area. The air was cold from it being nighttime in the middle of spring, despite being in the middle of the desert, and it almost felt as if it was going to rain. Lance kind of hoped that it would start. He missed the rain almost as much as he missed his family. Eventually they made it to the thing that Keith had called a house years before. It was still standing, but it looked like some of the windows had been broken through. Probably caused by the garrison after the four of them went missing with Shiro.
The sun was starting to rise in the distance which was good. It gave them a time estimate as well as light in a house that had no electricity.
“There will probably be people coming out to investigate what just landed in the middle of the desert soon. Probably the garrison, so we might not want to be here long. Do you think your radio still works Keith?” Shiro asked, making a point. They probably really didn’t want to be here when people sent search parties out. Especially the garrison. They probably got plenty of bad representation in the media after not just three of their members went missing a year before but also three current and one former student also disappearing. And all of them had seen how they were treating Shiro when he returned to earth. None of them wanted that. At all.
Keith went over and turned some of the dials on the several radios he had on a shelf. A few of them turned on blasting the static sound of an empty station out into the room. Keith turned the volume down on them and started flipping through stations. A few local music stations were playing songs that none of them had ever heard before. Keith just skipped past those unless they were on a commercial that might give them information on the date or time at all. Keith had found a news station that was giving them the weather, which gave them the date. The time was 6:30 in the morning on April 19th- no year added.
“Hey do any of you remember what frequencies the garrison used for communication? I might be able to find it if this one radio will work.” He hit the top of the one he had been messing with and it came to life. “Or not. Guess I didn’t change it after listening in that you had gotten back. I did spend a lot of time overhearing conversations on here.”
Shiro gave Keith a disapproving look before walking up to the radio and turning up the volume. It was only the crackle of silence that greeted them.
“Pidge, Hunk, Matt, my hoverbike was out back. Could you guys go see if you can get it to work again? We should probably stay here in case they say anything.” The three of them nodded and went out the door and walked around to the back where the bike was parked. Lance doubted it worked right now, if it even had any gas, being as it had been years since it was last used. But if anyone could get the thing to work again, it was those three. The three of them remaining inside sat on the couch waiting for a noise to be made on one of the radios.
“So what are we going to do when they get that thing fixed?” Lance asked. He was beginning to get worried about the fate of them all in the near future.
“Well, I have some spare money around here somewhere, so we can take that, hop on my hoverbike and fly down to the garrison if you guys think we could get away with it. Otherwise I figure we would just fly past it into the city and see if we can get somewhere from Albuquerque. I mean, I don’t have anywhere to go except here, but the rest of you have families to get back to. You can’t just stay out in the middle of the desert forever.”
“You aren’t really planning on staying here are you Keith?”
“It’s my only home Lance. It’s the only place I have ever lived outside of the house I lived in as a child in Texas and the garrison. Where else am I supposed to go?”
“Come with me. Back to Florida. You can meet my family and stay there for a while until we figure out what we are all going to do next.”
“I agree with Lance, Keith. You can’t stay out here in the house. It doesn’t even have windows anymore. If you don’t want to go to Florida then I’m sure you will be welcome to come with me to my parents house. They loved having you over the breaks when you were a student.”
“I can’t go to Florida with you Lance. You haven’t seen your family in who knows how long, I don’t want to get in the way of your reunion.”
“You won’t, I promise. But you just can’t stay here. I won’t let you.”
The door to the house opened, halting the conversation that they were having among themselves. Pidge stuck her head in through the crack.
“The bikes back on. I don’t know if we will all fit on there at one time though. I mean we barely all fit the first time and now we have an extra person. We could always try, but it might end up requiring two trips to wherever and you don’t have a huge amount of fuel left.”
Keith looked around the room and then back at Lance.
“Okay, we will figure it out in a minute. I have to grab a few things and then we can go.”
He began looking around the room for a few items. Almost everything had been knocked from the shelves sometime long ago during a search of the shack. He grabbed a bag out of a small closet that he had on a wall and began to put some things in it. He put his marmora knife in there, as well as two dusty books that had been knocked to the floor, and a blanket covered in several holes that was laying across the small dusty couch. He began to push the couch to the side and stepped on a few floorboards. One had a hollow sound when his food made contact with the wood and he got down on his knees to pry the loose board up. In there was wads of cash. More than would ever be expected for a guy that was living in a shack in the middle of a desert to have. He put all of it into his bag and threw the strap over his shoulder.
“I’m ready.”
“Where the quiznack did you get all of that money?”
“I’ve been saving it. And then my dad had some hidden here from when he lived here. And then he left me some when he went missing. Also just because I lived in a shack, we weren’t exactly poor Lance. I mean I got into the garrison, but I didn’t receive a full scholarship and I had my own hoverbike.”
“Fair points. I guess I always just thought that you had stolen the bike though.” Keith just rolled his eyes and the three of them walked out of the door and out back to where Hunk, Pidge and Matt were.
“Okay, I think we can all go at the same time as long as everyone holds on tight and doesn’t move a lot. It may be slow, but I’d rather be slow than risk not being able to get back. I think we should all just go straight into Albuquerque and figure out the rest from there. Pidge, Matt, do you still remember how to get to your house from the garrison, because we should go there first.” They both nodded in response.
Somehow they all managed to make themselves fit on the bike, balancing out the weight enough so that it was able to float completely off of the ground.
“Hold on tight, everybody.”
Keith began to move forward causing everybody to lurch forward. They might not have been going as fast as they could be, but it certainly wasn’t slow either. Keith flew straight ahead towards where the nearest road into the city would be. Once they made it to the road, they realized that it might look a little strange- not to mention a little illegal- to have so many people riding on a hoverbike at once, but they didn’t care. They had places to be. The sun had completely risen by now and the temperature around them had begun to rise. In the distance they could see the nearing city. At one point they passed a huge sign that read United States Galaxy Garrison: School of Military and Space Technology- next right. Lance just glanced at it as they quickly sped past, thinking of all of the things that could have been.
He blanked out for most of the ride, but somewhere in there Matt and Pidge had successfully navigated their way to the house that they had previously called home. He hadn’t been into the city since a few nights before their departure from planet earth, but it already looked different than it had when they had left. It made sense, they had been gone for years now. It was beginning to look like some of the civilizations that had been set up on other planets. Extremely futuristic and advanced. Lots of lights and almost everyone using hover vehicles now rather than on the ground cars- whereas before it had mainly just been bikes like Keith (which were big enough to practically be cars anyway). There were some new buildings that looked different from the modern that was modern when they left as well. But once they entered the neighborhood, everything looked as it was when they left it. The houses were still there as they had been for years and years. A few new ones stood out, but most of them were still the classic looking ones that they were all used to.
The Holt household looked like many of the other houses in the neighborhood. It was tan with the typical spanish style roof. Two storied and had a white garage. They figured the house still belonged to Pidge and Matt’s mother because the mailbox out front still read the Holt’s in big bold, red letters. Keith parked the bike in the driveway and they all got off the bike, hoping that she would be home. Matt grabbed Pidges hand as they walked up to the front door, the rest of the group following shortly behind. The doorbell rang.
“I already told you people…” She began as she opened the door, freezing when she looked up at her two children.
Lance had never seen Colleen Holt, but he had heard a lot about her. Her hair was down to her shoulders and there were hints of gray mixed in with the same light brown that covered Matt and Pidge’s heads. You could tell she was their mom, because besides the wrinkles that were beginning to form on her face the two now grown up kids were the spitting image of their mother. Her eyes were large, brown and sad. But right now she looked shocked- and as if she wasn’t breathing. She opened the door all the way slowly and reached her hands out as if she was going to touch the faces of the two kids she couldn’t believe were really there.
“Matt… Katie… Is that really you?” Tears were beginning to form in her eyes as the realization hit her that it was really them. Her arms wrapped around the back of both of their necks as she violently pulled them into the tightest hug that Lance had ever seen. Matt and Pidge let it happen as they wrapped their arms around their mother who they had not seen in way too long.
When they finally released each other, Mrs. Holt let everyone inside. They all gave a brief summary of the events that took place, explaining their disappearance as best as they could. Matt and Pidge would catch her up on the rest- filling in whatever details they could later. She was more than willing to let everyone stay there for the night to get some rest before they went out to find their families. Shiro would be staying with them for a while until he was able to go back out to San Francisco to try and find his parents. Meanwhile- Lance and Hunk would be going back to Florida where their families still remained and bring Keith along with them.
Lance and Keith were put in the spare bedroom for the night. Lance was so physically exhausted that it should have been extremely easy for him to sleep, but he couldn’t get his mind to rest. In just a few days he would be back with his family in Palmetto. But what if they weren’t okay? What if something happened to someone while he was gone? What if they didn’t recognize him when he got back? There were too many what if’s that were running through his mind. He knew he should be relieved to be back on earth where he belonged, but the only calming thing that he had at the moment was Keith who had already drifted to sleep hours ago. Eventually, during some point in the night, Lance was finally able to drift to sleep from the calming breathing of Keith beside him and the familiar sounds of planet earth outside.
The next morning after Colleen had fed them all an actual breakfast that they all devoured in matter of minutes and updated them briefly on the world as it was apparently almost six years from when they left later. She packed snacks for the three boys and insisted that they take her car since it was newer than Keith’s bike, it didn’t run on traditional fuel so they could get longer distances without stopping and since she mostly used her husband’s old car anyway, just for the sake of keeping it. Keith seemed hesitant to take the car, since he preferred his bike, but eventually gave in since they all couldn’t travel the full 26 hours on the back of the hoverbike.
This round of goodbyes was harder than the last ones with Allura and Coran. None of them in this moment knew what the future held for them. They had been connected in ways that no other people have been connected before- including being literally inside of their heads. Six years of saving the universe together and then suddenly it was over and they didn’t know when the next time they would be seeing any of the others again, if they ever would. Lance had to force the tears to stay behind. He had to stay strong. He hugged each of them individually, promising to get in touch when they made it to Florida. Hunk of course, called for a group hug again. Possibly the last one ever.
-
They dropped Hunk off at his family’s house. Lance and Keith didn’t stay around very long to see his mom’s reactions to him returning home. Lance couldn’t wait any longer. He was literally minutes away from him family and had been shaking so bad in the passenger's seat of the car for the past hour that Keith has asked him if he needed to pull over on multiple occasions.
Lance wasn’t sure why exactly he was getting so worked up about seeing his family. He knew he should be excited and relieved. After so many years they would get to see him and he would finally get to be home- the only place he could think about for the entirety of his space adventure. They would get to meet Keith and hopefully they would love him as much as he did. Maybe that was the source of his nerves. Or at least the thought that allowed for the others to form. To grow and fester that an infected wound that wouldn’t go away no matter what treatment it received. The wound has become Lance and Lance can never get rid of it no matter how hard he tries. Sometimes it just gets better for a while. Before, his family had been his treatment for it- and in space that job eventually turned to Keith, now he was about to have both.
Maybe it was time for it to completely heal.
Keith turned the final corner in the neighborhood, leaving Lance’s house to be only a blink away. His breath hitched in his throat as the car passed the familiar fronts of his neighbor’s yards. The red car pulled up to the curb and came to a stop. The driveway was full of cars, most he didn’t recognize. They looked newer, and they probably belonged to his older siblings. The engine cut off leaving the two of them in the dark, silent car waiting. Lance didn’t really want to go up right now. He was scared of what he would find. He knew it was still his home- but what if it wasn’t his home? He felt the cold touch of Keith’s hand as it folded itself over his shaking ones that rested in his lap.
“Are you ready?”
“I wish I was being asked that question six years ago instead of now.”
“What do you mean? Do you not want to go see them?”
“No. I want to see them more than anything in the world right now, but what if they don’t want to see me? What if too many things have changed and I can’t ever catch up again? What if they have moved on and left me in the dust? What if they don’t feel like my family anymore Keith? What the fuck am I supposed to do then?” He knew the thoughts were irrational, but they flowed through him. Taking over and controlling his thoughts. What if. What if? What if . It was becoming too much. Lance could feel his body starting to shake as the words rattled through his body, shaking him to his core. Becoming him.
“That is ridiculous, Lance. Of course they want to see you! Haven’t you seen how Pidge and Hunk moms reacted to them coming home. For six years, your families have thought all of you were dead at the age of 17. They are going to be thrilled when they find out their son is still alive. Lance, it’ll be okay. I promise. I’m here.”
He looked up at Keith’s face and saw how serious he was being. Lance didn’t have to look to know that he meant what he said though. Keith always took Lance’s moments seriously and always had Lance’s back. The problem wasn’t Keith though, the problem was Lance. It was always him. He knew everything Keith said was right but it felt so wrong that his whole body was rejecting it. Lance knew he couldn’t wait any longer for the inevitable though. He looked back down at their intertwined hands and squeezed his boyfriends in response to the one he was given earlier. I sign saying ‘I’m going to be okay. I promise.’
“We better go before it gets too late and everyone is asleep,” Keith said. He wasn’t pushing Lance but Lance took it as momentum to get up. He nodded and as he let go of Keith’s hand he opened the passengers side door and stepped out. He stretched for a moment as he waited for Keith to come around to his side. They locked hands again and made their way up the sidewalk to the blue front door of the house Lance had lived in his whole life.
Lance doesn’t remember ringing the doorbell. He doesn’t remember holding his breath. But his whole life comes back into focus when the door swings open revealing the aging face of his beautiful mother.
“Can I… Mijo…?”
“I’m so sorry Mami. I…” She paused for a moment, bringing her hand up and running her thumb along the scarred skin running down his face. A tear rolled down from his left eye and she stopped, reached forward and grabbed Lance, pulling him in as tight as she could. Lance wrapped his arms around her and leaned his head into her shoulder. Keith could tell by the way his shoulders were shaking that he was in tears.
Keith had seen Lance’s mother when they connected minds during training but not very often and definitely not recently. She was short, especially next to Lance who towered over her. Her hair was short and the same color as Lance’s but graying here and there. Her and him shared the same beautiful deep and soft skin. Lance seemed to get a lot of his looks from his mother, but Keith’s favorite were the eyes. As blue as the ocean and the holders of so much feeling and emotion. It was amazing. He just stood by watching as the two of them embraced each other for the first time in years. They didn’t break away until footsteps could be heard coming down the hall.
“Mama, it’s late. Who’s at the door?”
A girl with long brown hair and glasses came into the view of the doorway. She was about the same height as Lance, looked about 30 years old and was dressed in pajamas- obviously not planning to have come to the door.
“Hey Cami.” Lance waved to his oldest sister with his free hand being as his mom was holding onto the other arm as if she was never going to let it go.
“Holy fuck… it’s you!”
“Camilla! Watch your language!” Another voice came into the doorway. A man with a head full of gray hair and a trimmed beard. He was wearing a blue t-shirt and pajama pants, again dressed for something other than coming to the door as his daughter was. Lance’s father. “Son?”
Lance just stepped forward and brought his father in to a hug as he did with his mother. Mean while, Lance’s sister- Camilla- could be heard running into the next rooms announcing the return of the lost brother. Pretty soon there were six or seven people crowding around the doorway waiting to see if the word was true. Sure enough Lance McClain was back. He was finally home.
-1 week later -
The wind blew pulling a chill down his spine as little bits of hard sand came up to run over his legs and hands. The air was colder than normal and the sky was clouding back over for the second time today. It had rained earlier leaving the air lingering in the fresh scent from the morning shower. Most of the sand had dried on the beach and the sea was rushing around in the wind waiting to be stirred up again from the replenishing water that the sky was about to provide.
The beach was empty as of the moment minus Lance who had traveled down here alone. It was the first time he had been down to the beach since his reunion with his family only a week ago. Him and Keith hadn’t had time to come down here with all of the craziness that had followed with their return. So the moment the world began to mellow out for even a second, Lance followed the desire to run his hands through the white sand and waves and made his way on down here. Sure he felt guilty for leaving Keith alone in his house with his family but he was in the middle of playing some flight simulator game with his older brother Nick that he didn’t want to come between. Keith would be fine, they loved him from the moment Lance had said ‘this is Keith… my boyfriend.’
So he was alone. The only things to accompany him being his thoughts he can’t escape, the sea and old memories that danced around in his mind. Sure, this beach wasn’t Varadero with its lively atmosphere and green waters flowing with memories of a childhood from long ago, but it was something else special. It was the beach he spent most of his time on as a kid after they had moved here. It was where he belonged.
Lance tried not to think about the others. He hadn’t spoken to Pidge, Matt or Shiro much since their goodbye other than to tell them they made it. He tried not to think about Allura and Coran. Eventually he knew, the six of them would have to come together to come up with a plan on how they would address the fact that they were still alive to the world, but they had already saved the world so it at least owed them a break- so Lance decided he wouldn’t think about that either. It was hard though, not to relive the memories of a war in space. That was all he had known the past several years of his life and then it was dropped- the weight of the universe literally being lifted off his shoulders. He was as free as the ocean directly in front of him.
His mind began to wander as the sound of crashing water put him in a trance blocking out the entire world around him. He didn’t notice when the temperature began to drop more, or that the sun had begun to set in the distance. He didn’t notice the light footsteps coming up behind him either until a hand lightly fell on his shoulder pulling him awake.
“Your mom sent me down here to tell you that dinner is almost ready” Keith said as Lance turned his head over his left shoulder to look at his boyfriend smiling down at him. He watched as Keith’s face turned back up facing the sea out in front of him, hand still on Lance’s shoulder. Lance followed to where his eyes were looking. The scene in front of them was stunning. “So this is what you’ve been dying to show me all week, huh? It’s amazing.” Lance took hold of his hand and tugged him down to pull him in the sand beside him.
“We can go back in a minute. It’s always beautiful but it hardly ever looks like this.” The world may be cut off from his view on one side, but he didn't need both eyes to realize that this was the most beautiful thing he had ever laid eyes on.
The sky was cloudy and the sun setting causing the world around them to look purple. The reds and blues meeting in the middle, swirling their way around the clouds making shade of dark and light. The purple above was reflecting off the water making the forming and crashing waves of the never quiet sea turn a beautiful deep color unlike one Lance has ever seen. The world was still and silent in contrast of the recklessness of the ocean. It was the calm before the storm- waiting and preparing for what was to come. But how could anything ever go wrong when the world had the ability to look like this? Naturally beautiful and entirely mesmerizing.
Lance found the will to take his eyes off of the painting in front of him to look at Keith beside him. He was wearing an old green t-shirt of Lance’s and his black jeans. He had come out here barefoot and without a jacket as Lance had, obviously not expecting the temperature to begin dropping so much. The hair was standing up on his arms as the wind blew off the water straight towards him, but he didn’t seem to care. His long black hair was being forced behind him, clearing from his face and revealing a huge smile and soft eyes that looked happy and free- a look that Lance had rarely seen from Keith in the years he knew him.
There might have been an unknown impending future full of who knows what about to come for them but it didn’t matter in that moment. Nothing really did. Not the war. Not the future. Not his appearance and lack of vision that impaired the skills he had mastered in space. Not the seemingly constant, damaging thoughts that would make their way into Lance’s mind- making him feel hopeless and less than what he knew he was. None of it mattered because he knew that no matter what happened he would always have this and everything would be okay. When things went wrong- he could come back here, back home to this moment- and the world would find a way to fix itself again. Fixing him from his blue nature and allowing him to see the amazing red that his love right beside him, mending itself into a magnificent purple sea.
End .
I forgot I post stuff
Here are the Liyue textpost I promised XD
Fixing Blue
This is a second part to my story Seeing Red (found |x| for ao3 and |x| on my blog)
Healing must be one of the hardest things for the human race to endure through. Some are able to push through to the end easily, others struggle to make it all the way to the finish. And a handful, well, sometimes that healing process takes too much and pushes out the light before they even come close to the exit of the tunnel. Although everyone wishes that healing was an instant occurrence, it just isn’t and god knows if it ever will be. Even an ancient alien civilization far more advanced in technology than humanity wasn’t even able to perfect the seemingly impossible task.
For Lance, healing always seemed like it would be apart of his life. On his 5th birthday he had to heal for the first time after he fell off of the back of his sisters bike and fractured his arm, it took 4 weeks. The next time was 2 months after his arm was healed when he fell from the tree and twisted his ankle from landing wrong, that time is took only 8 days. The most recent major healing he had to endure before his departure to save the universe happened the week before being promoted to fighter class in the garrison. The day he found out Keith had been booted from the program started out being the best day of his life, but the moment he called home to tell his family he had a chance at moving up to what he came here to do, it turned sour. His abuelo died the next day, and Lance didn’t even get the chance to tell the person who believed in his dreams the most the news. That healing, will never be complete.
It only took a week for his arm to heal with the weird Altean cast on.
````````````````````
Moving was hard for him. It sounds stupid, but it's the truth.
Getting out of bed that first day ended up being too difficult a task after Keith’s “I need you” moment and Lance’s realization of how broken he had truly let himself become. So he didn’t proceed with the trying task and rather just stared up at the ceiling like he had done many a night, too drained to cry and too empty to feel or think anything else for the rest of the day. Night. Whatever it had ended up being before he finally closed his eyes and fell into a restless dozing. Hunk entered his room a couple of times after Keith left. The first time, he opened the door and brought in a bowl of the green slime they liked to call food.
“Hey buddy, you awake?” He whispered though he could clearly see that Lance’s eyes were in fact open. He made his way over to Lance’s bed and set the tray down on the floor next to the bed. “Oh no, shit Lance what happened?”
Lance didn’t respond.
Leave it to Hunk to recognize him in this state. Hunk had been the one to comfort Lance those difficult nights in their room at the garrison when he couldn’t sleep because of his loss. Hunk saw the mask fade away once Lance shut the door for the night and just sat there on the blue sheets of his bed telling him about all of the things he wishes he could have done and said but would never get to do. Hunk never tried to get Lance to sneak out like they had done before. He never pushed him to stay up late to play stupid games that Lance would come up with during the middle of a class when he finally stopped paying attention to what the teacher was trying to say. Hunk had complained about all of those things before, “Lance, come on we need to sleep”, “Lance we have a huge test tomorrow, neither of can afford to fail this one”, “Dude, Iverson is literally going to kill us if we get caught leaving our room this late”. But he never really meant them, and during those few days he wanted them to return more than anything else in his life, but he didn’t push. They would find their way back into his life after almost a week, not because Lance had gotten over what had happened, but because he realized that wasting his life was the exact opposite of what his abuelo wanted for his life, which is why we applied for the garrison in the first place, and slowly went back to living his life as he had been. But occasionally Lance would go back into those habits, and this was one of those times.
“You know I’m not gonna force you to tell me anything, but you know I’m here for you when you need me man. I’m always here”.
He didn’t want for Hunk to leave his room, but he also didn’t do anything to stop the exit. He just sat there in silence, listening to the sound of his own breathing and the harsh tone of his thoughts, wrestling around the inside of his mind.
Not much more happened that day. Pidge came in with Shiro to check on him, and she invited him to go watch her play their game that they had bought back at the space mall. She knew how much he loved to watch her play it, not in a creepy way though, when Pidge played it reminded him of when he would babysit and his younger brothers and sister would fight over the controllers and play the videogames on the small television in their little house. He didn’t take her up on her offer though, not today. Shiro just wanted to make sure his arm wasn’t hurting too bad, and honestly he had almost forgotten entirely about his arm if it hadn’t been for the restraint movement that he had when trying to bend it. Coran also came by to check on his arm and spent the first part asking questions but quickly realized that Lance was not in a chatting mode and switched it over to a story about when Allura had to wear one of these devices in her childhood. He was always good in that way, seeming to always pick up emotional cues and adjusting his ways to fit the needs. Sometimes he wondered if it was an Altean thing and then would remember that Allura never seemed to notice when he was feeling this way, but he really couldn’t blame her, she had much more important things to worry about and frankly probably didn’t care all that much on the kind of day Lance was having unless it directly affected team Voltron.
The last visit he got that day was another one from Hunk in which Lance spent the entire duration holding [and failing to] back tears as they sat on the floor leaning against his bed.
“Hunk, I fucked everything up. Why do I always fuck everything up.” There was a scratchiness to his voice that was unnatural and made him cringe with every syllable that left his lips. He sounded so broken and it just made him break a little more with every word.
“I talked with Keith earlier Lance, he feels horrible you know. You didn’t mess everything up.”
“Not with Keith. Well yes, with Keith. I fucking told him I loved him, Hunk! How is that not fucking it up? Not only that but I then proceed to punch a wall and break my hand. Who the hell punches walls? Fucking dumbasses, Hunk that’s who. Now Keith knows everything, and god knows everyone else probably does too, I don’t even know if I can pilot at the moment but I still promised Allura I would, and I’m just bits now Hunk. Ever since we got here I’ve been blaming everything on Keith but it was never his fault. This entire time I’ve been slowly unraveling and I was so sure it was his fault but it's not Hunk. It’s all me, I broke myself and I don’t know how to fucking fix it because all I ever am capable of is breaking”.
“Lance- that’s not…”
“Don’t tell me it’s not true Hunk! At this point I don’t even remember who I was before this, all I know is that I’m stuck here now and I just- I just need to go home”.
“I know, buddy. We all need to go home.”
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He came out of his room the next day.
Today was going to be the day Lance went back to being Lance. No one would look at him as a broken toy. No one would sit in a slightly uncomfortable silence around him in an effort to comfort. He wasn’t going to let them. Today was going to be normal.
The dark room around him slowly started to illuminate as the castle started powering on the lights for the day, starting a stinging sensation in his eyes that forced him to half squint in order to see. Without allowing time for regret, he achingly pulled back the covers exposing his uncasted arm to the cool air of the metal building. The floor sent chills up his legs as he grudgingly shuffled across the floor to grab his clothes from the closet like panel on the opposite side of the room. He really needed to ask Allura if they had any other clothes, because his blue and white baseball tee and jeans were starting to get a little too redundant to wear. His brothers jacket, however, that thing he would wear until the day he died.
The bathroom across the hallway was one that he and Keith shared since their rooms were right next to one another. Lance slowly made his way over to the door, knowing that Keith wouldn’t be using it at the moment. Keith always woke up unnecessarily early, like 2 vargas earlier than when the lights turned on. And luckily for Lance, that meant that he had also finished up in the bathroom way before Lance even was close to needing it, meaning that he could avoid at least one awkward encounter for now.
Lance tried to make everything like it had been before. Like it had been when they first arrived at the castle. When his efforts weren’t difficult and when he could look into the mirror and see hope and adventure rather than emptiness and disappointment. He tried. But no matter what he did, the water in the shower seemed just a little colder, the food goo mask seemed a little clumpier, and his face seemed a little more paler than it previously had seen. It seemed as though the color and comfort was draining away from the world; and it was taking him with it.
It took 3 tries for him to finally go to the kitchen. The first was after he left the bathroom. Once the door closed behind him, it closed up his lungs as well. He caught himself on the wall as the tried to breathe but wasn’t succeeding. Eventually he made it back to his room where he was able to calm down long enough breathe again. The second time was roughly 10 minutes later, after pacing around the room repeating “You can do this. Just fucking go McClain” and then proceeding to promptly open the door and then close it immediately after. The 3rd time was more or less what someone would call a success depending on who was being asked. As soon as the door closed, he reopened it and took a shaking step outside.
The lights in the hallway were spread further apart than the ones in his room making it appear slightly dimmer. It was also colder out here as the air ran through the hallways causing his nervous shaking to get slightly worse. He pulled his jacket around his tighter and took a step out. The walk down the hallway and towards the kitchen area never seemed as long as it had now. Every step hurt and felt like his legs were about to give out on him. His body and mind were weak from the last couple of days and he felt as if he could fall over and just lay there for hours until somebody came and found him, but he kept on going. Pushing through to a normal day.
“Well someone has to bring him food! Why can’t it be me?”
“Keith, you know why. We all already agreed…” Shiro’s voice traveled through the thin metal door leading into the dining area allowing Lance to hear it with ease.
Lance stood behind the entry way, breathing in one last breath before putting on a smile and pressing the button. Shiro paused with the woosh of the door and everyone's eyes were on Lance. The scene before him was not one that he was expecting. They were all sitting around the long table but not actually eating anything. In fact most of the food looked untouched. Keith was halfway between the table and the door with a bowl of food goo in his hand and with an exasperated looking Shiro standing next to his chair. Everyone was dead silent as Lance took a step through the door and for just a moment he thought his facade might fade away revealing his nervousness and uncertainty, but it didn’t. Rather, he took on his usual stride and made his way over to the table, keeping his arm near to him at all times.
“Well guys I know I’m strikingly handsome, but I didn’t think it was enough to leave a whole room speechless,” he managed to get out as he sat down. He heard Pidge and Allura sigh. He gave Allura a look and winked at her like he usually would after making a comment as such, and like clockwork she rolled her eyes back at him, but with that he noticed a small smile forming in the corners of her mouth.
“Well it’s good to see that you are feeling better, Lance”
“Of course Princess. I told you I would be fine, it takes a lot to knock me off of my feet.” Lance noticed that worried glance he got from Hunk after that statement but decided to ignore it. “Anyway, where did my food go?”
Everybody turned their heads back towards Keith. His face got a deep shade of red and he looked down. Lance saw Shiro sit back down out of the corner of his eye. Keith started shuffling his way back towards his seat next to Lance.
“Oh so now you’re trying to steal my food too? This rivalry is getting serious if we are messing with each others food now too”. He tried to control his voice, and it semi worked.
“I-uh, I was going to bring it to you… but I guess that isn’t necessary.” He eventually made it back over to his chair and set the food down in front of him. Despite Lance’s efforts to try and play off what had happened over the past couple of days, he could sense everyone was worried about the future relationship between the two paladins and what it meant for the future of Voltron. The tension in the room was becoming unbearable and the silence of the crowd wasn’t helping.
Lance tried to eat the goo as quickly as he could with his left hand, and though his efforts were snail like and the time dragged on for much longer than what seemed possible, he still managed to be the first person finished with their food.
“Well, if you guys would excuse me, I have some bonding to catch up on with Blue.”
“Don’t forget about the training later, Lance.”
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world Princess.”
He could finally breathe again as the door closed behind him.
----------------
“Hey there beautiful, did you miss me?” He asked while walking up to the ginormous metal paw that stood in front of him. In response, a purr like sound came from her as her head lowered allowing Lance to step inside the all too familiar area. The blue lights powered on around him and he closed his eyes allowing for him and Blue to become closer. Blue could read his thoughts, just as he could feel hers. He knew that she was worried about him and worried about him piloting with a broken arm and she knew that he was tired and scared for what was going to happen next. But they were able to take comfort in each other as always.
He doesn’t know how much time he had spent in the hangar with Blue but he didn’t care because it was the most relaxed he had felt in a long time. It wasn’t until he heard Allura’s voice coming over the castle coms telling him to report to the training deck that he finally opened his eyes.
Blue let him out and he took one final look at her before turning and running towards his room to change into the blue armour that he now called his.
He made his was towards the familiar area of the training deck but this time it was different. This time it wasn’t just memories of training or late night walks that would flood his mind upon entering the room. There would be the added image of Keiths face as he was screaming at him. Keith screaming at him back. His hand crumpling against the impact of the wall. All things he would rather not see. But he could do it. He did it for every other day before that and he can do it now. Maybe.
Hopefully.
The room didn’t suck the sound out when he entered this time. Allura and Coran were up in the control room and his fellow team members were gathered in a circle in the middle of the room talking amongst themselves. They probably wouldn’t have even noticed him if it weren’t for Alluras announcement.
“Oh good, you’re here. Okay paladins, since we can’t exactly do any team sparring exercises today we are going back to one of the easier team building exercises of the invisible maze.” Everyone collectively groaned at the memories of how painful the maze could be. “No complaining. We could all use a little team bonding and this is one of the easier ones. And, whichever team gets through the maze the fastest with the fewest mistakes gets to leave training early.”
“How is that promoting bonding, isn’t that just creating competition?”
“Precisely number four! You can’t have a team work well together if they can’t even have a safe and friendly competition every once in awhile.”
“And after the past few days, I believe we could all use a little fun.”
Lance already knew this wouldn’t be fun however. His bonding exercise partner was Keith and he had a feeling Allura and Shiro weren’t going to let him switch for today's competition. In fact, they were probably hoping that a competition would bring the two of them closer together. Lance didn’t blame them though, he understood that the events that unfolded in this very room only 2 nights before could have severe consequences and better try and stop them now before it hurts the team. Lance didn’t want to hurt the team anymore than he had.
He took one final deep breath in before glancing at Hunk, mouthing to him ‘I’ll be okay’ then striding on over to where Keith and Shiro were talking.
“Ready Mullet?” He asked the red paladin. Keith just gave him a slight smile before nodding at Shiro and replying “Sure thing partner.”
Pidge and Hunks maze went extraordinarily well as it always did. Hunk got a little nervous when giving directions like he always does, but it seemed more controlled than usual. Probably because he wanted to get back to trying to figure out how to create better food from food goo. Allura went with Shiro, but she only directed him rather than switching to be directed later. They always worked the best together, which was expected with them being the leaders and all.
It wasn’t until it was time for him and Keith to go that things started to go wrong. Lance could feel the anxiety starting to build up in him as he stepped into the maze. They always failed the maze. Never once have both of them successfully gotten through it without screaming at each other or purposefully running the other into the wall. Lance kept waiting for the shock that came whenever he ran into the wall but it never appeared.
“What the quiznack? Did Lance just go through the maze without touching the wall once?” He heard Pidge call from the control room over their coms.
“Wait I’m finished?”
“Yeah, congratulations boys. Now if you can do that again and maybe a little faster with Keith then looks like you two will be done with training for the day.” Allura replied.
“No but seriously. How did you two do that? You guys always bomb the maze?”
“I guess we just make a good team, Hunk.” He heard Keith let out. Lance could hear the amusement in his voice as he said it. Lance soaked that feeling in letting himself temporarily forget about the last few days and go along with the moment.
“Hell yeah we do!” He yelled back turning and smiling towards the room where everybody was standing watching him as he fist bumped the air.
Well, like everything else in Lance’s life, this started to fall apart as well. Lance got up into the control room and scanned over the map trying to find the best and quickest way out of there. That was the part he was good at, it was the speaking directions part that always got him. Ever since he was a kid things like directions took slightly more time to process than things like numbers and physical images did. He could feel the brief moment of happiness slipping away from him and feel the pull of anxiety and failure starting to take control again.
“Um, take two steps to your right and then head straight for another five steps. Small ones. Make sure they are small. Wait! Actually those were too big so stop.” The rest of the maze came out in hesitant statements and shaking words, but regardless Keith still stepped and turned as directed. Then he ran into the wall.
“Shit! Ow, come on Lance!”
“Oh God. Sorry, I- I meant left.”
“Ok, calm down Lance. It’s fine. Just think about it before you say things or we are going to lose points for aim rather than time.”
He hit the wall a total of 6 times. Which, is better than the usual count that is closer to 20 for each of them. Lance sighed in relief as Keith exited the maze rubbing the arm that took most of the shocks. ‘Shit that's his sword arm. Shit, great. Fuck he’s probably going to be mad.’
He felt Shiro pat him on the back but he didn’t respond. Words were being said to him but it was too much.
“Lan- Lance! Are you okay buddy?” He looked up at Hunk who was now holding onto his good arm supporting him so he wouldn’t fall.
‘So much for a normal day…’
“Lance I think you should spend your extra time off from training resting,” Shiro told him. He was giving him an extremely concerned look.
“Guys, what’s going on up there?” Keith asked from the floor of the training deck.
“Keith, could you help take Lance back to his room?”
“No! I’m fine. I can handle it, I have a broken arm not broken legs. I don’t need Keith to escort me, he already did that enough today.”
“Calm down Lance. You are really pale right now and… “
“Just shut up Pidge! I’m not a broken toy in need of fixing,” LIES. “I don’t need you guys treating me like a stupid child just because of a broken arm! You guys didn’t need to set up a competition to try and get me out of training early! I don’t need…”
“That is enough Lance,” He looked up into the hurt eyes of Pidge, the surprised eyes of Hunk and Shiro and the angry ones of Allura.
“I’m- oh God. No, sorry, I…” he didn’t finish the sentence, instead he just left the control area as fast as he could and walked back to the one place he knew would help him.
-------------
He could hear them talking about him over the comms as he walked towards the Bridge.
“There is something wrong with him besides just his arm.”
“Maybe he is more homesick than usual?”
“I think the other night just really messed him up.”
“Do you think he will be okay?”
When he got to his chair on the bridge he removed his helmet and pulled up the star map. The room around him grew dim and surrounding him were little spots of light representing every star, planet or sun that is around them. The star map always amazed him. How something so large could be contained to such a small area and even then it only showed was was nearby. There were just so many different things out there and none of them Lance had even known about when he left Earth. Oddly enough, the feeling of being so insignificant and small to such a large scheme of things did the exact opposite of what most people would think. Rather than make him more anxious it helped calm him and helped him focus in on what the real problems that mattered were.
He put in the coordinates for Earth and sat there while the image of it popped up in front of him. Small and blue just like a lot of the planets that were around him.
If he couldn’t go home, then why not at least look at it to give yourself a little motivation of what to fight for.
His mind became lost to him again, so much so that he wasn’t even aware of the person that had come in and sat down next to him. They sat there in silence for a long time just looking out at the various stars and the galaxies that were placed out in arm's reach of them. Neither one acknowledging the fact that the other was there. Just the two of them sitting amongst each other, small in comparison to where they were.
“Lance I…”
“I heard what you said.”
“What?”
“Yesterday. When you came into my room after arguing with Shiro. I was awake. And I heard you.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah.”
“Well I meant it.”
“I know you do. I could hear it in your words.”
“I don’t hate you.”
“I know.”
“I like you Lance… I actually really like you.” Lance could feel his heartbeat speed up as those words left Keith’s mouth. “And I was a coward for pretending this whole time like I didn’t. And for yelling back at you the other night when I could see that you needed help.” Lance felt warm as he became aware of Keith’s hand slowly covering his own in between them.
“I’m so sorry Lance. I’m so sorry I broke you.” Lance finally looked up at him while completely intertwining their hands together.
“It wasn’t you Keith. I was already a mess. Ever since we got here I’ve been a mess. It just became too much, I kept on piling on different things like you and our rivalry and not disappointing Shiro and trying to keep all of you alive and it just was so hard to do all of those things. And I broke. I spent so many nights awake trying to blame you for all of my issues and thinking that if it wasn’t for you then all of my problems would be solved but it wasn’t true. You didn’t break me Keith, that was all on me. Everything. From going off on you, to blaming you, everything was all me. All you did was play along with this stupid competition I created and looked great while doing it. If anything I should be sorry. Sorry that I hurt you, and the team and myself.”
“Lance, you didn’t hurt the team. Obviously. We were the ones most affected by the other night and look what we did today! We kicked Pidge and Hunks assses in the maze. If the team was affected, I think it would have shown today. If anything we are stronger than before.” He squeezed Lance’s hand as a way of reassurance and Lance squeezed back. “Oh my God look at us,” He said as he brought their hands up into the air so they could both see them. “It’s like our bonding moment that you don’t remember all over again.”
“Not exactly, this time you don’t have to cradle me as you carry my half dead body to the cyropods.” He said giving Keith a slight smirk getting an offended look out of Keith and a newly freed hand.
“I can’t believe I fell for you of all people,” Lance felt his face kind of drop at the statement. “It’s not like you made it hard or anything with your selflessness and stupid good looks.”
Lance didn’t know how to respond to that. He wasn’t used to getting compliments from people, especially Keith. So instead he just looked at Keith, smiled and leaned his head on his shoulder rather than taking his hand again.
“So what now,” he asked as Keith draped his arm around him carefully so that he wouldn’t bother Lance’s broken arm.
“Well now we try to fix you.”
“Keith, you do realize that I am extremely gone and that you alone won’t be able to do much.”
“Yeah, I know. But that doesn’t mean we can’t try.”
it hasn’t been edited but I know some people have been waiting a couple of weeks for this new part so I decided to go ahead and post it!





