#feels trip

[takeafeelstrip]

I think I got so caught up in becoming the right person for you that I never stopped to wonder if you're the right person for me.

[raindrenchedasks]

Okay. Thought too hard about bg3 Got sad about Astarion. Here's why.

Alright. Elves don't sleep. They slip into a meditation and sort through their memories. Technically they CAN sleep under certain circumstances but most don't want to. Check out MR. Rexx on youtube for the full explanation. (I don't know the guy, he just explains things very well going through all editions and extra lore from DnD.)

THUUUS Astarion is either going through memories while he was enslaved or possibly further back before the vamperism. Now. Follow me on this.

Elves of all kinds sort of go through a recycling thing. They live, they grow to a certain age, strike out on adventures to make fun memories to relive when they meditate, and eventually, grow to want to stay put. Then die. AFTER THAT HOWEVER they go to a sort of heaven, with the elven gods, hang out and be free and joyous spirits. Then they're reborn. As babies and children, they remember those times as a soul before they start to forget. Eventually, the will have no memories of their past lives, or the inbetween. It's when they completely forget that time that they count as an 'adult' and the cycle truly starts again.

Accept. Not Astarion. He will never go back to that joyous time because of Cazador. And, if he was truly counted as an adult at that time, he has no memories of being free among his people or what ever past lives he had.

Astarion might not even be able to experience this if he dies. Because he is a vampire. (Not sure on that one so there may be hope.)

So, he's unable to even remember being truly free. That is until he meets Tav. His whimsical laughter, or pleasure seeking isn't just him being a rogue. He's building memories that he can meditate on, and feel joy about.

As a side note, Halsin may be 'old' by his own accounts, but he's not quite past his adventuring days yet. Old elves develop cataracts that look like little moons in their eyes. So Halsin has a few good years left in him.

[sabiekay]

A summary of my reaction to The Astronaut

[mamamittens]

Smooth like Butter

Aka: I take y'all on a feels trip and you can't stop me. (I'll roast Katakuri later lol, he ain't going no where)

Warnings: vague mentions of lost love but no specifics. No physical details about characters or reader given aside from "pretty thing".

The party was raging somewhere behind you. Had been raging for several hours now and you couldn't be damned to find out what it was about. You felt...

Empty.

Drained perhaps.

The world continued to spin around you, but left you firmly on your ass. What were you supposed to do now? They were your everything and now... Now they're gone. Did the particulars really matter at this point? You'd already obsessed over every detail. Every last fucking conversation about them, around them, and with them.

At some point you had to just... The dark ocean waters beneath you beckoned with moonlight rippling across the broken surface.

The breath you held onto slipped out softly. Like it was an accident you began breathing again.

"Keep looking so deep and the sea will start looking right back." Someone commented behind you. You spared them a glance but much like the days since... Then, their appearance was fizzled and faded. You think you spotted concern but certainty was beyond you now.

"Don't you have somewhere to be?" You asked, voice faint and raspy. They sat down next to you and sighed.

"I've always loved a good mystery." They hummed, "Must be something pretty serious to have a pretty thing like you looking at the sea like that."

You snorted dericively.

"Only what troubles every damn idiot." You mumble and they suddenly hum with inspiration.

Leaning over, they whispered with what must have been a smile.

"Who pulled honey from a beehive first. That has troubled many a damn idiot." The wistful tone as they said such a stupid thing pulled a shocked laugh out of you.

"No! That's not--I mean that is a good--no! It's... Dumber than that." You trailed off, looking back out at the sea again, "What am I supposed to do? I thought... Well, I was wrong obviously but... I thought it was forever. And isn't that a laugh? Should have known better and now I'm out here feeling sorry and stupid and... Like everything is empty now. Is this what love's supposed to be like? Everything until it isn't?"

It hurt but like an old injury kind of hurt. Aches when it rains or you think about the stupid situation that gave you it.

The silence felt heavier than the hand that rested on your shoulder. The touch warmer than the apathy that had settled over your bones. For the first time in forever you felt like the water wasn't closing over your head.

Just for a moment.

"It's like butter, I think." You looked over at them again, startled and worried that you'd poured your heart out to someone improbably more stupid than yourself.

They laughed at your expression.

"Well, doesn't hurt to have it, now does it? Goes with just about everything. But there are people out there that can't have it. Can't stand it. Never tasted it before in their lives. But toast is still toast without butter. You can still have cake. The world isn't closed off without it just... A bit smaller now. Putting big old sticks of it everywhere only does so much. Gotta spread it out or your just eating lumps of fat."

"I'll be damned.. that almost sounded inspirational." You commented and they smiled, giving you a hearty wink.

"Bet you a round of beer only improves it."

"You want me to buy you beer just to tell me I need to go on a diet? Can't say there are many worse ways I've been told that..." They snorted.

"I meant to buy you beer. If you think you can handle a few hours thinking about something besides how much you miss butter." They held out their hand and smiled. "I wouldn't mind distracting you for a night or two."

You snorted, taking their hand.

You could see yourself reflected in their eyes. Fragile smile bathed in moonlight.

"That was pretty smooth..." You whispered, letting them guide you to the party and far away from the water.

"Like butter?" They grinned over their shoulder and you tried to smack them, but your hands were firmly linked together still.

[jay-christine91]

I have cried so much in 48 hrs that I have my own river now

[zfiledh]

I was not expecting this specific feels trip for “Reaching Out”.

We now know what happened to Luz’s Dad. :( And the way Luz and Camila remembers him (by collecting and giving each other flowers as he once did when he lived) was a sweet and loving gesture that helped them bond since his passing. Realizing that this is the first time that she won’t do this with her Mom is so painful for Luz. 

Camila Noceda’s tears and pleading to Luz from “Yesterday’s Lie” now has additional nuance; she already lost her husband and to “lose” her daughter too...the pain. The unbearable heartbreak. 

This meta nicely summarizes Luz’s greatest character flaw: trying to solve everyone else’s problems to try to forget/avoid dealing with her own. I find this EXTREMELY relatable; I’ve buried myself in work and reading fanfics after I lost my sister to cancer more than 2 years ago.

Amity’s face when Luz finally tells her.

It is a testament to Amity’s awesome girlfriend status that she knows that Luz didn’t mean to set off the Abomiton’s alarm & bring Alador to the Bonesborough Brawl and offers to find flowers for Luz so that she could continue the “tradition” in the Boiling Isles. All while she was under time pressure to get back to the Brawl to figure out the cause of the ruckus...

Amity finally stands up to not just her mother, but also her father, and let’s him know that she’s not interested in pursuing a post in the Emperor’s Coven, she’s dating Luz, and her hair isn’t green anymore. At least Alador seems appreciative of the fact that her hair is the same color as the Abominations. And that “Mittens” has come into her own as a witch who will be heard, damn it!

Edric has some insecurities, and the B-plot helped to boost him up. Also, Emira should totally get a Bad Girl Coven shirt too; she did healing magic too!

Eda and Alador know each other, confirmed. Blight be warned, Eda knows about what happened with Luz at the Abomiton demo...

Luz is now experimenting with mixing up glyphs, and is most likely going to teach Amity how to draw glyphs (I have high hopes for this).

I do have one concern: will Eda use the mutation potion on herself????

Wrath did prove helpful about one thing: not everyone in the Coven likes what Belos is about to do on the Day of Unity.

Hunter is a fan of King’s book. LOL

Next week: we get a flashback episode! And...

Calling it now: King’s connection to the Titan!

[vulcanhugsclub]

An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works

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